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This is a link post Woman survives after being buried alive by bear
according to Russian media
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:49, Reply)
This is a normal post Also reported in that publication:
siberiantimes.com/weird-and-wonderful/news-and-features/news/granny-gives-bears-their-marching-orders/
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:55, Reply)
This is a normal post Siberian lols
"'March, march away from here immediately' - she shouts as they retreat, adding a Russian swear word for good measure"
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:00, Reply)
This is a normal post those sweary bears, it shouldn't be allowed

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:01, Reply)
This is a normal post That's actually quite an interesting website
Here's another gem: siberiantimes.com/science/casestudy/news/n0207-mammoth-could-be-brought-back-to-life-in-siberian-reserve/
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:02, Reply)
This is a normal post Just in time for lunch

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:20, Reply)
This is a normal post Gosh, that must have been unBEARable for her.

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:10, Reply)
This is a normal post UrsusVsH3r
(a new section in the Siberian Times)
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:17, Reply)
This is a normal post I bet there was a big paws before she was found.

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:28, Reply)
This is a normal post At lease she escaped a grizzly death

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:30, Reply)
This is a normal post It's ursine of the times.

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:54, Reply)
This is a normal post did she hear the bear shit in the woods?

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 15:14, Reply)
This is a normal post maybe not
#tappen
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 15:53, Reply)
This is a normal post No shit!

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 16:21, Reply)
This is a normal post No diggitygrisly

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 19:25, Reply)
This is a link post I guess we'll be getting more newsletters?
Sell shares in the ginger fuhrer.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:11, Reply)
This is a normal post
Rob has trouble eating bacon sandwiches too.

I wish we could have that nice Mr Blair back.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:41, Reply)
This is a normal post Which insecure job future are you?
CLICK TO FIND OUT
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:45, Reply)
This is a link post He only left the bloody door open
silly prince charles
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:06, Reply)
This is a normal post *Writes letter*

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:52, Reply)
This is a link post re flight of the bumblebee
some japanese dude shredding it at about 300bpm
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:00, Reply)
This is a link post [prolly dont click this link if you value work
I got 12 first ever go

beat THAT
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:57, Reply)
This is a normal post As you say
dangerously addictive
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:05, Reply)
This is a normal post ok, 14 first go

17 second go. good fun
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:08, Reply)
This is a normal post bitch

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:11, Reply)
This is a normal post can't get higher than 18

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:54, Reply)
This is a normal post well youre better than me

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:56, Reply)
This is a normal post 17 first go

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 20:43, Reply)
This is a normal post i got 13

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:11, Reply)
This is a normal post I got the sack

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:15, Reply)
This is a normal post 19 on my first go.
Dabnammit!
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:20, Reply)
This is a normal post 20x7 on my second go.
I consider that game done, time for some work....
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 14:14, Reply)
This is a normal post 12, then my boss walked over
So yeah. Oops.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:28, Reply)
This is a normal post 13
and i hate you
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 14:00, Reply)
This is a normal post bloody hell, where did that hour go??

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 14:01, Reply)
This is a link post Nah mate, you were right the first time
BBC reporter has James Naughtie moment.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:35, Reply)
This is a normal post Gold :D

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:41, Reply)
This is a link post The Simpson's voice actor quits
He voices Burns, Ned Flanders. Principle Skinner among others.
Not sure if they'll kill of the characters or get a new actor to voice them?
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:35, Reply)
This is a normal post they can't expect the show to last forever
I'd kill it now
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:41, Reply)
This is a normal post He's 71, prolly not got long left anyway

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:42, Reply)
This is a normal post Blimey he's 71!
He's looking very well on it
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:42, Reply)
This is a normal post Crikey - he makes up about half the cast.
I expect they'll be trying to get him back by any means necessary.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:42, Reply)
This is a normal post after 26 years they must have enough in the archive to splice his lines
and judging by the current series, it will cover any eventuality
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:48, Reply)
This is a normal post Good for him.
I think he has been pretty critical of the series decline anyway.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:46, Reply)
This is a normal post Thats the thing about voice actors
You can replace them, and no-one can tell the diddly-ifference
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 15:40, Reply)
This is a link post Absofuckinluteley unexpected!
My whole life is a lie.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:38, Reply)
This is a normal post spam

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:47, Reply)
This is a normal post Spam
cunt
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:48, Reply)
This is a normal post Cunty spam cunt.
Your whole life is a lie.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:06, Reply)
This is a normal post Oh, bye then

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:17, Reply)
This is a normal post Your whole cunt life is full of cunting spam.
Fuck off.
Mods, this cunt always does this. Slap a ban on his spamming ringpiece.
Thanks *spoons*
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:21, Reply)
This is a normal post of all the websites in all the world it baffles me when spammers pick this one
is our small cohort of jaded peurile timewasters some sort of desirable target demographic?
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:08, Reply)
This is a normal post They think it will get them backlink rating improvements in Google
They are wrong, because b3ta is coded to make that impossible.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:41, Reply)
This is a normal post SPAM: ELIMINATED

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:48, Reply)
This is a normal post Good, but,
not enough blood and guts. Could do with less spam as well
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Nonce.

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 15:44, Reply)
This is a normal post You've been kitten'd

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 16:17, Reply)
This is a link post Join the fun
Countdown how much time is left until Johnny Depp's dogs are killed
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 5:49, Reply)
This is a normal post Doggone!

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:15, Reply)
This is a normal post Pet smugglers support terrierism

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:15, Reply)
This is a normal post cant they put them in quaranteen?

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:18, Reply)
This is a normal post
quar c
mmm yum, hotdogs!!
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:38, Reply)
This is a normal post I hope they get killed
so I can start a band called Depp's Dogs Dead
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:18, Reply)
This is a normal post Your first hit will be 'Terrier Burier'

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:23, Reply)
This is a normal post Woofanasia?

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:25, Reply)
This is a normal post 'Edward Deceased Hounds'?

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Ouch.

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:00, Reply)
This is a normal post When I last went to Oz the customs dog found a sealed peanut bar in someone's luggage
I thought the Aussies were more paranoid about terrorists than we are?
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:30, Reply)
This is a normal post
someone's luggage my ass.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:11, Reply)
This is a normal post
ass arse
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:12, Reply)
This is a normal post Dead man walkies. We got a dead man walkies here.

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:47, Reply)
This is a normal post I wonder if it'll be death by hanging
or will the dogs think they're going for a walk
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:51, Reply)
This is a normal post A few suggestions here from a link yesterday
www.cookyourpet.com/html/euthanasia.htm
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 15:16, Reply)
This is a link post How to snap like a diva

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 2:33, Reply)
This is a normal post I like this.

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:28, Reply)
This is a normal post *click*
*click*
*click*
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:32, Reply)
This is a link post Crow revolution!
A kestrel tries to force a Jackdaw out of a nesting box....Jackdaw unleashes some chuck norris type shit. After 3 minutes another Kestrel arrives to try and inject some spunk into the right carrion

Don't fuck with jackdaws.

Quite old but no glass cockenspiel.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 1:28, Reply)
This is a normal post Blimey!
What a carrion!
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 6:35, Reply)
This is a normal post They made a Rookie mistake!

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 6:48, Reply)
This is a normal post Stupid birds


... am i doing it right?
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:03, Reply)
This is a normal post Cor-vids like this are amazing!

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:13, Reply)
This is a normal post They'll be raven about it for ages

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:17, Reply)
This is a normal post Jackdaw dropping!

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:30, Reply)
This is a normal post
That kestrel is a craven coward.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:11, Reply)
This is a normal post the robin bastards!!!

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:20, Reply)
This is a normal post Yeah but who's the real thief?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=_4BBp28_ZLk
(, Fri 15 May 2015, 22:04, Reply)
This is a normal post 3:25 "Leave it Kes, he's not worth it!"

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:58, Reply)
This is a normal post I love the bit where jackdaw just struts around a bit and then leaves :)

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:11, Reply)
This is a normal post Jackdaws are ace

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:56, Reply)
This is a link post I was getting bored of drones
However this guy has rekindled my interest. Bit shaky here and there, but you can't fault him for effort and imagination
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 1:11, Reply)
This is a normal post I used to think there were cameras everywhere.
Now, with the spreading of drones, I realise how much "everywhere" was still left to fill with cameras.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:11, Reply)
This is a link post Short film meant to be aired before the Empire Strikes Back found

I'm not into Star Wars, but this may interest some of you?
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:51, Reply)
This is a normal post I *MUST* remember
That when a girl comes back to my slum I pass my self off as a film director by the virtue of film posters in my bedroom....(and perhaps as the director of Guinness for the "i'm here to study poster")


EDIT: Edit
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 0:02, Reply)
This is a normal post He was a bit crap at fighting :(

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 0:08, Reply)
This is a normal post It's just a flesh wound

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 4:59, Reply)
This is a normal post that's pretty much how supporting features were..
mind numbingly boring. Modern adverts are far easier to sit through.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:08, Reply)
This is a normal post I vaguely remember that
and have often wondered what the film I saw before Empire Strikes Back was.

"..He saw Black Angel but was never quite sure if what he saw was a film, or something he had imagined." BBC article

Now I know!
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:36, Reply)
This is a link post The Day Your Arse Caught Fire...
Chyort voz'mi!
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:45, Reply)
This is a normal post More of this sort of thing.

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 0:06, Reply)
This is a normal post It is a metaphor for life.
You're warming your spuds by lifes fire,it all goes up in flames and then someone comes along to 'help' you by kicking you in the ass.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 0:09, Reply)
This is a normal post My friend's dad wrote that song.

It was about her conception :/
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 0:15, Reply)
This is a normal post Oooh yes!
The actual words "I just died in your arms tonight" originally came to Nick Van Eede while he was having sex with his girlfriend. The French phrase "la petite mort" ("the little death") is a metaphor for orgasm. After writing down his version of the phrase, he later used it as the opening line to the song as well as using it as the chorus.

Should be 'died in your clunge'
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 0:33, Reply)
This is a normal post The metaphor of death equated with orgasm is not exclusive to French literature. It is, after all, the climax.
I can't be arsed to look for examples but it's common to Chaucer and Shakespeare. See also the ingestion of food being called consumption, the act of fucking being called the consumption of a physical relationship, and pneumonia and TB, for centuries resulting in almost certain death, being referred to as 'the consumption'. It's disputed, but the breathlessness that lung disease causes was compared to the breathlessness of a good shag that is so all consuming, hence 'the consumption'. I'm fairly sure the same metaphor is found in classic Greek and Latin lit.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 1:06, Reply)
This is a normal post

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 1:45, Reply)
This is a normal post ?

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 1:56, Reply)
This is a normal post Probably too much vodka in his piss-stained trousers.

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:09, Reply)
This is a normal post Story of my life :(

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:55, Reply)
This is a normal post
Looks like he got lucky there with cotton trousers, synthetic would have melted and destroyed half his skin.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:17, Reply)
This is a normal post They look like Tabs 'weekend' trousers .......
.so Im told.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 14:17, Reply)
This is a normal post it's not funny
my ass is on fire
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 19:53, Reply)
This is a normal post Put your donkey out then!

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 23:17, Reply)
This is a link post The day her car caught fire
something something something smokin' hot russian.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:19, Reply)
This is a normal post hairspray and then lighting a fag perhaps?

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:22, Reply)
This is a normal post Breathing vodak fumes and lighting a cig?

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:40, Reply)
This is a normal post 1:15 "Hmm... maybe I should just back away slowly..."

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:13, Reply)
This is a normal post Classic Citroen behaviour

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 14:02, Reply)
This is a link post The Day the Earth Caught Fire
Haven't seen it for ages.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 22:25, Reply)
This is a normal post The easy way
To tell if someone will ever make it as a journalist is to ask Earth Saved or Earth Doomed? No hack would ever want to write Earth Saved. Filmed in the old daily express office, when it was a newspaper as opposed to a seedy porn baron's joke at truth's expense.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 22:28, Reply)
This is a normal post That last part of this is epic.
Only parallel I can make is 28 days later.
World Saved. World Doomed.
World.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 22:56, Reply)
This is a normal post great film
feels unnervingly relevant nowadays.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 0:44, Reply)
This is a link post Must have been...
...posted ?
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 20:59, Reply)
This is a normal post About £1.50
I'd take quite a few and ebay them.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 21:04, Reply)
This is a normal post This is why we can't have nice things...

(, Wed 13 May 2015, 21:12, Reply)
This is a normal post OK, I'll let you have one for the same price I got it
CANDLES!
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 21:14, Reply)
This is a normal post DECCA CANDLES,!!!!!

(, Wed 13 May 2015, 21:22, Reply)
This is a normal post ooooo candles

(, Wed 13 May 2015, 21:26, Reply)
This is a normal post Happy Candle-wank!!!

(, Wed 13 May 2015, 21:41, Reply)
This is a normal post Birdseye potato candles.

(, Wed 13 May 2015, 21:46, Reply)
This is a normal post Dem candlez b trippin

(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:06, Reply)
This is a normal post Happy Decacandles!!!

(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:34, Reply)
This is a normal post Happy CANDLE DAY!!!
A decade of your life wasted here :)
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:39, Reply)
This is a normal post someone should flim a tshirt popping out of a hole and edit it into this video when the people press the button.
Just for lols.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 21:58, Reply)
This is a normal post If only we knew someone who was good at animating stuff...

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 0:16, Reply)
This is a normal post Why the fuck don't they advertise the alternatives then ?
Where are all the nice sweatshops ? Fucking Birmingham - Not anymore.
Can't even buy decent lace in Nottingham anymore.

The only answer is second hand shops. Yay!
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:02, Reply)
This is a normal post Yeah, but where's the fucking 'give me my coins back' button?
Also, nice that they managed to salvage 30 seconds of 'hand over mouth' out of 15 hours worth of people who don't enjoy being preached at and just walk away.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:31, Reply)
This is a normal post So only cheap clothes are made in sweat shops,
and the more you pay for clothes, the more the person who made them gets. Got it.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:37, Reply)
This is a normal post Yep that's spot on
Nike trainers for example cost almost £80 to make and they sell some onto us at a loss, becuase they are generous.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 11:17, Reply)
This is a normal post needs more uplifting music

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 7:38, Reply)
This is a normal post I would hammer the "buy" button.
Fuck shit like this by mediacunt budget-bonos, who happily guilt the unwary as a means of self-promotion.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:09, Reply)
This is a normal post I wouldn't press either button
I'm not the kind of idiot who buys a t-shirt I'm unlikely to ever wear from a vending machine, just because it's cheap.

I but t-shirts when I need them, and then I buy ones that are *FABULOUS*
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:52, Reply)
This is a normal post a few pence a day to live on..
and if everyone stops buying these clothes?
They don't have a job. woo.
aren't we all so awesome that we can donate €2..

What do you think happens if you buy the Tshirt? Do you think that the vendors say "wicked! that's €1.90 profit for us!! get more T shirts" or do you think they give that T shirt for free and donate that €2 themselves anyway?.

Hit buy or donate it matters fuck all. all that happens is one way you get the shirt. they still get the donation. for whatever good it does.

What this machine does is trick people into giving money. if there was a refund button, I'd hit that.
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:20, Reply)
This is a link post Animal cruelty
Disgusting, poor monkey.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 20:54, Reply)
This is a normal post Fucking hell
He meant that a
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 21:39, Reply)
This is a normal post Oof.
Dwarf kicking reaches new heights.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 22:31, Reply)
This is a normal post Yep

Also definitely a new low.
(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Ha ha ha!

(, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:16, Reply)
This is a normal post well choreographed - must have taken some rehearsal

(, Wed 13 May 2015, 23:36, Reply)
This is a normal post hahaha
weeeeee
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:34, Reply)
This is a normal post hahaha
also the comedy bonk on the head
(, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:45, Reply)

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