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# Tom Watson the MP of hackgate fame has just tweeted a request for B3tans to photoshop 'Theresa May's migrant cats'
twitter.com/#!/tom_watson/status/121251080150585344

Do you want to? You're not his photoshop bitches and all that, but it's right to pass the request on.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 16:59, archived)
# what's the pay like?
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:00, archived)
# I think it's the same rate as all photoshops on b3ta
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:01, archived)
# sweet!
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:02, archived)
# Win!!!!
:D
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:12, archived)
# Is that cop doing a wee?
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:15, archived)
# give it a minute and he might be
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:18, archived)
# Just fiddling with his extendable baton.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:25, archived)
# Miaow !
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 18:35, archived)
# Ah.
Mild sense of self loathing and occasional kudos.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:02, archived)
# Cold, dead eyes of a killer...
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:21, archived)
# Hahahaha
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:22, archived)
# this is worthy of an FP
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:31, archived)
# NEVER FORGIVE!!!!!
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 4:02, archived)
# Now he can be deported!


Hooray for TOAA!
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 18:33, archived)
# nobody is ever going to read or notice this
but it's removed, not deported. Failed asylum seekers are removed (or not as the case may be). If fucking Teresa fucking May can't get it right, what hope is there for the rest of you/us/them?
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 22:41, archived)
# I read it.
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 11:00, archived)
# I read it.
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 19:40, archived)
# Actually
I am his photoshop bitch.

Thought this was as good a time as any to go public.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:00, archived)
# So THAT'S why I'm not his bitch anymore. Bitch.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:01, archived)
# You just can't stop offending people, can you? :p
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:04, archived)
# Oh noooo I did it again, mum :(
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:07, archived)
# No wonder Tom Watson MP won't forgive him either
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:08, archived)
# just looking for tom watson
he loves his pies
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:09, archived)
# don't misunderstand Tom Watson MP
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:10, archived)
# Does he lack humanism?
According to the Daily Fail he didn't lack funding!



Oh wait, who am I meant to be taking the piss out of again.

Jesus, there's so many fucking walking parodies these days I don't know what to do.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:14, archived)
# is his how a discomeats person gives birth?
With incessant leg throbbing?
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:16, archived)
# Very small groinal accordion
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:18, archived)
# which one hastily beats with the fuck trumpet
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:19, archived)
# I would go to this concert.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:20, archived)
# Just avoid the drummer
his stick beats into everything
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:20, archived)
# yes
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:19, archived)
# Nooooo, not the parody paradox!
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:16, archived)
# Parott Piled Parody Paradox Parity Party
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:20, archived)
# Let me get this straight...
A retired snooker player has gathered layers of self-referential imitative works in order to mock himself, and the sum of such imitations has led to a situation which defies logic... or at least each parody contradicts the premise for the other parodies. And this confounding situation has itself created changes in the symmetry of physical quantities under spatial inversion - and there's a big, fuck-off party about it? Am I invited?

apologies for how twattish the above sounds
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:30, archived)
# hell yeah
bring a bottle

also, bring an empty bottle, incase the toilet breaks
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:45, archived)
# I'm gonna need something wider if it's a number two.
Have you re-dug the flowerbeds lately? Only, I could turn them over after I've been.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:53, archived)
# nah it's ok
I'll just leave an anonymous tipoff to the police that there's a body buried under them.

Should have that hard soil fixed in no time.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 18:21, archived)
# Is it definitely him?
This could be the new 'Virgin Money'...
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:01, archived)
# it is him
well if it's not he's fooling over 50,000 people which is pretty impressive
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:04, archived)
# Perhaps we should then
seeing as he did such a sterling job of taking down Murdoch.

Tell him I'll definitely do it if he'll give me a PSVita to replace the PSP I won from Virgin Money.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:05, archived)
# Does he follow you, or do you follow him?
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:19, archived)
# no thanks...i'm busy
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:01, archived)
# What are you?
A Labourite 'shopping bitch?
(This is the correct response, isn't it?)
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:01, archived)
# someone asking b3ta to shop something for them
this always ends well
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:02, archived)
# he'll never forgive you
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:04, archived)
# ^ this ^

Let the mayhem ensue ...
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:05, archived)
# I'd want a free pizza wheel
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:02, archived)
# what's the bet we'll see a whole lot of 'shops of Tom Watson urinating on Theresa May whilst holding a cat?





*fires up photoshop*
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:03, archived)
# Good to see b3ta get back to normal
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:05, archived)
# ^
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:28, archived)
# *closes photoshop*
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:06, archived)
# oh well, that's my idea ruined...
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:09, archived)
# ding dong
Fire it back up again
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:10, archived)
# I ... get..
mixed horn!

want mixed horn? Ok, take ten minute!
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:15, archived)
# I have the two T(h)eresa Mays combined
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:18, archived)
# not safe for anywhere
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:22, archived)
# did you soil your pants?
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:29, archived)
# i sicked a little
then made this


Teresa May and her pussy
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:37, archived)
# i'm trying my hardest not to squint or look at this from far away
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:40, archived)
# go on you know you want to
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:42, archived)
# ok, i did
but luckily it ended up just looking like a cdc

phew
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:43, archived)
# Smells the same at any distance.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:43, archived)
# Luckily I was going to do it the other way round.
Theresa May urinating on a cat while holding Tom Watson
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:33, archived)
# he really just wants to see some sexy Theresa May photoshops
/avoids pussy joke
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:06, archived)
# Let Beau Bo do it
It's more his scene
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:07, archived)
# Indeed he's probably already on the job
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:09, archived)
# I thought he'd retired.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:10, archived)
# I hope not
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:24, archived)
# By jove! this chap has lavished!
"used parliamentary allowances to lavish"

LAVISHED

!!!

I don't even know what that means.

Because I'm a product of the failed [conservative][labour][no lol, there isn't a 3rd choice really, I mean.. hahahaha no 'completely fucked' isn't really a good party title is it]* education system.

*delete as appropriately biased
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:12, archived)
# :)

(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:13, archived)
# Hahaha
on a related note, I'm sure Christine Hemming was in our building today, so have this again:


(I only recognised her from having photoshopped this)
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:13, archived)
# Pfft...
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:14, archived)
# pffffft
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:17, archived)
# Hahahahahahahaha
Could watch that all day :)
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:20, archived)
# *finally stops watching*
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 13:41, archived)
# "these are going straight down murdoch's mouth"
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:15, archived)
# I've got Boris Johnson arriving in London with his cat
That any good Tom?

(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:15, archived)
# Whats twitter?
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:21, archived)
# it's like friends reunited
except the people aren't your friends
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:23, archived)
# Noone on twitter has any friends
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:54, archived)
# i think it's a birdspotting site
i could be wrong
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:24, archived)
# It's like Facebook for people with no attention span.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:24, archived)
# what's a
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:27, archived)
# it's w
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:40, archived)
# o
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:58, archived)
# Top Secret Government Spy Site
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:29, archived)
# I had beans for lunch
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:40, archived)
# That bit of skin between the twat and the shitter.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:43, archived)
# Perineum 2.0
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:47, archived)
# Immigration Control
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:32, archived)
# Meanwhile, back in Bolivia:
(, Thu 6 Oct 2011, 14:59, archived)
# It's going to be Virgin Media all over again
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:47, archived)
# Ironically, Tom can't see any of this because b3ta's blocked in Parliament :P
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 17:54, archived)
# it's good that the government blocks the government from seeing what happens in the world
just think of all the rational decisions they might otherwise make
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 18:41, archived)
#
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 18:03, archived)
# haha
I for one welcome our kitten-bearing overlords
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 18:17, archived)
# Hahaaha
Sorted
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 18:44, archived)
# seamless....
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 19:01, archived)
# play yourself off keyboard may
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 19:27, archived)
# Read the Tweet thing and realise Tom Watson's been directed to this thread
so thought I'd add a link to my effort (further up the board)

b3ta.com/board/10560672
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 19:40, archived)
# I like this.
Van doors!
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 0:15, archived)
# I'm peaing this down here, cos of what Rob said about it being in this thread

I wonder if the right honourable gentleman is regular enough on b3ta to be familiar with all our strips, memes and flouncers. Otherwise hardly any of these are going to make sense.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 21:06, archived)
# Coming over here, looting our petshops...
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 21:13, archived)
# I ain't nobodys bitch - but what the heck!

(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 22:06, archived)
# Another Childhood memory ruined
*Sobs*
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 22:41, archived)
# Sorry
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 22:49, archived)
# Kitty Politics

Keep cats out of politics I say, they only have their own interests at heart.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 22:48, archived)
# In the interest of balance.
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 23:17, archived)
# Just in case
anyone was wondering just what story May was thinking of:
original immigrant cat story
(, Tue 4 Oct 2011, 23:35, archived)
# So a big non-event really
The moggy was just used as further evidence of a genuine long standing relationship with a British citizen, a situation which can be used to confer a right to stay in the UK.
(, Thu 6 Oct 2011, 12:42, archived)
# Opening the door to more systematic abuse
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 0:11, archived)
# I like this
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 9:21, archived)
#
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 8:53, archived)
# Bloody gingers, sneaking into the country...
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 9:10, archived)
# I didn't spot the request to put them in this thread
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 9:24, archived)
# That UK flag/map logo
looks like Britain is being bummed by Europe. Quite apt really.
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 10:03, archived)
# DEE... DEE... DEE DEE ELL \o/
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 10:27, archived)
#
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 13:43, archived)
# It was Kitty Söze what is the ringleader and stuff...
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 14:36, archived)
# Someone's bound to spoil this eventually...
Kitty Söze is the one on the end.
(, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 18:56, archived)
# *knock, knock*
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 15:22, archived)
# seams like a good place to break a duck...
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 17:01, archived)
# The Minister's Cat
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 17:13, archived)
# sweet!
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 18:08, archived)
# ...
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 18:09, archived)
# in for a penny & all that


oops!

(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 19:15, archived)
#

(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 19:42, archived)
# Waves
twat

It's a puppet!
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 21:36, archived)
# and one more
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 22:22, archived)
# it's like the railway kittens all over again- but in reverse....ish!
(, Thu 6 Oct 2011, 5:01, archived)
# with apologies


PS by way of balance we should also demand some photomontage of Tom Watson brandishing a pizza wheel, no?
(, Thu 6 Oct 2011, 9:05, archived)
# These are not the cats you're looking for.
(, Thu 6 Oct 2011, 12:02, archived)
# Cats in disguise, hiding before our eyes
(, Thu 6 Oct 2011, 12:54, archived)
# Fuck off
Helping labour win a political point?
(, Sat 8 Oct 2011, 11:36, archived)
#
Image and video hosting by TinyPic
(, Sun 9 Oct 2011, 0:30, archived)