I hope you're not a farmer.
Bingowings 2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:29,
archived)
thats a amzingyou looked into my brain and pulled my fantasies right out
(
Yeknom. Incontinence and Premature ejaculation? Easy come, easy go.,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:30,
archived)
Thought i'd have a go at this colourisation lark!
What do you think for a firster?
Naive Amoeba Bored Cig,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:17,
archived)
Very good!Better than the coloured version of Gone by the Wind.
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:19,
archived)
Gone by the Wind?Don't think I've seen that one.
Is it by Metro Goldwyn Astronaut?
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:23,
archived)
Is it by Metro Goldwyn Astronaut?
your spelling is terribleand I'm not interested in your sexual preferences.
picture is very good though.
EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT
Did I forget to put a :-) - It was meant as a joke ! - I come back and find people have taken offence !
Pah! sorry - I am old and my mind works too slowly..
(picture is very good though.
EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT
Did I forget to put a :-) - It was meant as a joke ! - I come back and find people have taken offence !
Pah! sorry - I am old and my mind works too slowly..
beaubodor blogless,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:19,
archived)
i don't even understand what i've spelt wrong.. Naive Amoeba Bored Cig,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:22,
archived)
ohhhhhhhi thought maybe it meant like, firster as in virgin etc etc
and just because i like putting my knuckles in bums doesn't make me a bad person?
oh wait, yes it does..
(and just because i like putting my knuckles in bums doesn't make me a bad person?
oh wait, yes it does..
Naive Amoeba Bored Cig,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:24,
archived)
It's not the knuckles that make it wrongIt's the forearm.
( Bingowings 2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:28,
archived)
i'd count the elbowas officially wrong
( Yeknom. Incontinence and Premature ejaculation? Easy come, easy go.,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:29,
archived)
spelt wrongLYDont get your adverbs and adjectives confused.
edit: How rude. Woo to colour pic!
(edit: How rude. Woo to colour pic!
Paper Tiger,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:23,
archived)
i'm tired and rather dizzyand have a bad case of AAMS (adjective adverb mixing syndrome)
( Naive Amoeba Bored Cig,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:25,
archived)
ohh thats nicei wonder how it was done .. i have only ever done the real thing - with photos and oil paints
(
connor,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:20,
archived)
they had to be very careful with the 'product positioning'*
*in the photo shoot context, not the marketing context
beaubodor blogless,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:13,
archived)
Fun Socks is acceptable language these days
Enigmatic ™ Voice No More ©,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:16,
archived)
not round these partswe still cover up table and chair legs as stipulated by Queen Victoria.
( beaubodor blogless,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:17,
archived)
those two sheepmust get so bored/tired, they don't get to fly..
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:10,
archived)
whooshthat's the sound it made when it went straight over your head
(
GrandmaOfShoes,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:20,
archived)
mich auch/determined NOT to be left out if things involve sheep
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:22,
archived)
How duncelike I feelYou'll have to excuse me. It's been a long day
(
owain2002,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:23,
archived)
haha that's alrighthope it's been a long day for the better rather than the worst
( GrandmaOfShoes,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:24,
archived)
I'm not sure to be honest =S(See anim below somewhere)
( owain2002,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:25,
archived)
hahahaha aceness!and evening by the way, i couldn't hear a word you said last night.... there was lots of noise then i heard someone shout "He's hanging on the roof!" and caroline hung up
( lemony,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:13,
archived)
i had forgot about that: )
to much beer i think
(to much beer i think
pippy is a truck,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:15,
archived)
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
sof sof,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:46,
archived)
OK, As promised...Here's my deafo dad getting the news of a lifetime:
Note one: The Welsh translation is only important towards the end
Note two: Yes, my dad is that stupid! Unlike the animation of my mother, this one is 99.9% authentic. (He grabbed a glass at the end, not a bottle)
(Note one: The Welsh translation is only important towards the end
Note two: Yes, my dad is that stupid! Unlike the animation of my mother, this one is 99.9% authentic. (He grabbed a glass at the end, not a bottle)
owain2002,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:07,
archived)
Nope, butI do live in a small Welsh mining village...
( owain2002,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:18,
archived)
at least there was no doors CDcongrats.. if that's the right word.. or well done, yes, well done is better.
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:10,
archived)
hahaBut who are Beth and Pam? I bet they put you up to telling him. :)
Well done though, couldn't have been easy.
(Well done though, couldn't have been easy.
Fronkle99,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:10,
archived)
It wasn'tBut I'm all happy now. Any ideas on how to introduce them to my "friend"?
( owain2002,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:11,
archived)
dress up like circus performersand launch him out of a cannon in through the window during dinner.
guaranteed to make it less awkward.
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:13,
archived)
guaranteed to make it less awkward.
Just bring him aroundwithout telling your Dad. If he has to think about it he'll probably have all sorts in his head. But if he meets him like that then he has no chance of getting any questions ready.*
Bring a bottle of wine of course.
*May be awful advice.
(Bring a bottle of wine of course.
*May be awful advice.
Fronkle99,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:14,
archived)
Bring him to dinner as a friendAnd then say "Dad, please pass the salt to my gay lover".
( wayward.,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:17,
archived)
In factThis would have worked better if you hadn't told him you were gay already. Use one of those flashy things off Men In Black.
( wayward.,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:19,
archived)
I'll go do it right now...Also, I'll speak in english next time
( owain2002,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:21,
archived)
Why were you telling him in Welsh anyway?It's a silly language
( wayward.,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:12,
archived)
Indeed it isBut he is a silly man, and insists the entire family speaks it
( owain2002,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:13,
archived)
Serves you right for not havingany Js in your alphabet.
( Bingowings 2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:13,
archived)
But we have letterslike ch, ll, dd, ng, â, , , etc... Much more fun!
( owain2002,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:17,
archived)
hah, crazy. Just reminded me,I had to go to Cardiff a couple of weeks ago over the Severn Bridge. Got a bit more closer to Cardiff and saw a digital motorway sign with
"RDHT CHPEPP'S". I made a funny remark to myself about the crazy Welsh language, but 3 miles later realised it was a truncated traffic warning for The Red Hot Chilli Peppers tour.
("RDHT CHPEPP'S". I made a funny remark to myself about the crazy Welsh language, but 3 miles later realised it was a truncated traffic warning for The Red Hot Chilli Peppers tour.
Fronkle99,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:21,
archived)
no reason for this reply.i just like chevrons.
(
parttimedogfish is a Born-Again Reincarnationist,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:27,
archived)
Js are the most important though.How can you get a job, have some juice, go to a gin joint or be a Jew?
[edit] Or play cards? No K,Q or J? Blimey.
([edit] Or play cards? No K,Q or J? Blimey.
Bingowings 2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:17,
archived)
yet half the population is called jones
MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:15,
archived)
hehewell done!
( parttimedogfish is a Born-Again Reincarnationist,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:27,
archived)
SE was right...(
parttimedogfish is a Born-Again Reincarnationist,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:06,
archived)
it is,i was only joking
:-)
(:-)
parttimedogfish is a Born-Again Reincarnationist,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:09,
archived)
good one,i'll add it to my stand up comedy material.
( Sunshine Elephant,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:06,
archived)
oooohvery nice.
if i were you, i'd call the first one "coffee machine monkey."
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:03,
archived)
if i were you, i'd call the first one "coffee machine monkey."
it looks more like an inverted toilet to me(this means i like them a lot)
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:04,
archived)
the mindpiss !arf .. it does look like a toilet i suppose
( connor,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:06,
archived)
yeah, now tell us or grandma and i will beat the shit out of you![punches fist into open palm repeatedly]
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:11,
archived)
ok i checked on 4rthurand mindpiss does not mean what i think it means
boo hiss
i prefer my meaning :)
and i have stick with a nail - so run !
(boo hiss
i prefer my meaning :)
and i have stick with a nail - so run !
connor,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:14,
archived)
top mashagewoo
( MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:14,
archived)
!hug?don't mind if i do
*extends arms*
/awaits hug
(*extends arms*
/awaits hug
GrandmaOfShoes,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:00,
archived)
blimehyou'd think people'd learn not to stand in front of me
*bums*
(*bums*
lemony,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:03,
archived)
argh!!your bumvirginity is trying to eat my petunias, take it back! take it back!
( lemony,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:09,
archived)
thatis the best sentance EVER.
I will gladly have it back if its not wanted *sniff*
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:13,
archived)
I will gladly have it back if its not wanted *sniff*
[makes horrified expression]i'm not sure i like that.
but i won't say anything about pictures about george bush and tony blair being cunts or tits or twats or twunts, since everyone else seems to enjoy them.
but to look on the bright side, i admire your ability to look at that picture long enough to shop it.
after coming out
bert and ernie decided to adopt a baby of mixed race
mongychops,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:52,
archived)
They aren't gaythey're just life partners
;)
(;)
koit WWW.HIGHASAKOIT.CO.UK,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:59,
archived)
parpwoo
tj: anyone have the answer on how to extract .sfv files? and if they do can i please have it
(tj: anyone have the answer on how to extract .sfv files? and if they do can i please have it
Punked I Love Vectors,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:00,
archived)
goffs innit
inspired by an afternoon in Kensal Green cemetery
Gribbley,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:49,
archived)
i hate squirrelsthey're always after my nuts
that pun hurt a lot
(that pun hurt a lot
The Incredible... accident free since,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:58,
archived)
mimbo's protest for higher wage was highly constricted by the global mime laws
Sunshine Elephant,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:43,
archived)
your face sold here? MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:46,
archived)
hiam i the only one who thiks this is rubbish
he can't even draw
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:47,
archived)
he can't even draw
yes.edit/to the only one who thinks its rubbish. not the drawing.
calihal,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:47,
archived)
he's making something in ms paint,but he's rubbish at drawing, so i have no worries.
( Sunshine Elephant,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:50,
archived)
you cockburger Yeknom. Incontinence and Premature ejaculation? Easy come, easy go.,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:48,
archived)
ahhe's sill a cockburger
Yeknom. Incontinence and Premature ejaculation? Easy come, easy go.,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:51,
archived)
yesyou're a relation it all makes sense now
/loses all spare change
ah piss
(/loses all spare change
ah piss
GrandmaOfShoes,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:48,
archived)
Oh, sush!
edit: Ah, now I've seen your profile, everything becomes clear. Carry on, then!
mechamatsimpsk,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:51,
archived)
I've gone off in my pants again.
Holy fuck! It came out black!
Bingowings 2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:47,
archived)
I've had the gush for a while.I hope I'm not piling the pearls into St Peter's dress, huh?
( Bingowings 2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:57,
archived)
It is like trying to tighten up a screw with a maggotand trying to keep the lob in a sexy twat, that is very tricky, but I guess it is better than squirting up your squit to death.
( Bingowings 2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:02,
archived)
I'm listening to it now.Loads of noise breaking out over Yorkshire right now due to DJ Amyl Right-Mate at the Salty Gob in Leeds.
( Bingowings 2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:08,
archived)
Great styleand moving more into gags as well.
You are maturing like a fine wine sir..
(You are maturing like a fine wine sir..
beaubodor blogless,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:50,
archived)
fastest PS I've EVER done :)Guess the movie..
Seam-Fucking-Less
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:40,
archived)
Seam-Fucking-Less
yappy bastard dog and other dog in water: the second encounter GrandmaOfShoes,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:41,
archived)
is that the one with the dogs and the water?oh and the yapping of course
( lemony,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:42,
archived)
well it's the sequel.more yapping, and the dogs are played by different dogs.
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:42,
archived)
ahhhh, the original cast are probably so dosed up on crack that they don't know what day it isit's terrible how things can go to new stars' heads
( lemony,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:44,
archived)
Why does the one on the righthave bats wings for ears?
(
Coctail,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:47,
archived)
it's jesus.that's what jesus looks like.
don't make fun of jesus.
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:48,
archived)
don't make fun of jesus.
thats how i like 'em!!wet and smelling of dog food!
( Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:42,
archived)
swimming border collie and yorkshire terrier? MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:42,
archived)
they've made a movie of it? parttimedogfish is a Born-Again Reincarnationist,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:43,
archived)
you've gone way off the mark there:)
( MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:49,
archived)
Rollerball?
Space Jam?
I'm stumped.
(Space Jam?
I'm stumped.
Barry Chuckle III - the troll with a soul.,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:55,
archived)
new ad campaign
Reagan's fucked up (in the pic and literally) but I can't be bothered to fix..
EDIT - slightly fixed
beaubodor blogless,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:35,
archived)
hehethat clown gives me teh fear (despite working for McD's)
( MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:37,
archived)
Haha you work for Macdonaldsthat means chav's buy their lunches off of you
( GrandmaOfShoes,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:39,
archived)
and argue with meI find it most amusing to slip insults into 'conversations' with them and they don't realise
( MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:40,
archived)
haha i piss the people off at the drive in"hi, i'd like some large flies and two slawbelly milkshakes please"
"what milkshake?"
"slawbelly"
"ok sir, Strawberry?"
"yes slawbelly"
("what milkshake?"
"slawbelly"
"ok sir, Strawberry?"
"yes slawbelly"
GrandmaOfShoes,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:42,
archived)
luckily I don't work at a drive-throughI just get the chavvie fuckers who hang around town all day
( MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:44,
archived)
haha i make it my mission to piss of the drive through workers as much as possible"another routine is, i'll have a burger and don't spare the horses, i find they're the tastiest bit..."
"what?"
"burger please."
"what about horses?"
"don't spare them"
"i'm sorry we don't serve horseradish here"
etc...
("what?"
"burger please."
"what about horses?"
"don't spare them"
"i'm sorry we don't serve horseradish here"
etc...
GrandmaOfShoes,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:46,
archived)
arfcustomers with a sense of humour make it almost worthwhile
( MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:55,
archived)
You will answer all my questions....
Marillion's Marble Loo loo loo, I got some apples,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:30,
archived)
![[challenge entry]](/images/board_posticon_c.gif "Challenge Entry: Make up stuff to sell on Ebay"){kind=small}
*opens up ebay**starts pricing up 100% kittens clothes*
( 100% of Gibbon,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:33,
archived)
*looks up from make-up mirror*i thought you were dead.
( 100% of Gibbon,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:35,
archived)
play nicely you two*gives 100pcg a chinese burn and pulls 100% Kitten's ponytails*
( bleepbloop,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:44,
archived)
*charges towards bleepbloop wielding blunderbuss, whilst using £1000,000 bukkake guard for protection* 100% of Gibbon,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:52,
archived)
Self-TJTo the Masters of b3ta.
Why not include some sort of "Refresh" link that simply links to the board?
If I understand correctly, people doing "Refresh" or F5 will have all the images reloaded too, with quite a waste of bandwidth/time...
(Why not include some sort of "Refresh" link that simply links to the board?
If I understand correctly, people doing "Refresh" or F5 will have all the images reloaded too, with quite a waste of bandwidth/time...
frox,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:33,
archived)
because it caches the images so it doesn't cause problems to refreshersand a button like that would eat up the b3ta bandwidth
( GrandmaOfShoes,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:34,
archived)
I am not sure...I did some experimetns, and F5 seems to hit a second time my server's logs.
But maybe it was just an HTTP HEAD command... dunno.
(But maybe it was just an HTTP HEAD command... dunno.
frox,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:36,
archived)
true!someone on here has list of all IE shortcuts in their profile!!
( Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:43,
archived)
??At least in Netscape, I see no difference between F5 and CtrlF5.
Will experiment more...
(Will experiment more...
frox,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:45,
archived)
I believe in netcrapshift-F5 is the equivalent of interweb exploder's ctrl-F5
( --=| Daz |=-- has been masturbating over a picture of you since,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:49,
archived)
it's usually a normal GET + if-modified-since headers...(
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all foreskin of the apocalypse,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:08,
archived)
Yeah, I agreeIt would be nice to have a 'live' version of the board, which works more like live chat.
( Coctail,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:38,
archived)
but then your reading something and poofits gone besides someone made a page like that a while ago!
( Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:41,
archived)
F5 (normal reload) will in most browsersre-request the page, and then request the images IF they have changed since last requested (if-modified-since / e-tag headers).
A click on a link to an already downloaded page that has proper headers set (no-cache etc.) will reload the page, but will probably NOT re-request the images. This will reduce the bandwidth for the image servers, but only by about a 300 bytes per request or so, assuming the webservers for the images are well-behaved. Ofcourse 300 bytes x 10,000 unnessisary requests per image is still 3Mb per image..
You can check this on firefox if you have HTTP headers plugin (not installed now, sorry).
(A click on a link to an already downloaded page that has proper headers set (no-cache etc.) will reload the page, but will probably NOT re-request the images. This will reduce the bandwidth for the image servers, but only by about a 300 bytes per request or so, assuming the webservers for the images are well-behaved. Ofcourse 300 bytes x 10,000 unnessisary requests per image is still 3Mb per image..
You can check this on firefox if you have HTTP headers plugin (not installed now, sorry).
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all foreskin of the apocalypse,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 23:06,
archived)
In fact I hate all retaillers of stationery/Hale and Pace
( enthusiastic amateur delurked at:,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:30,
archived)
Did you hear the one about the man who ate stationery?He said it was his staple diet.
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:31,
archived)
woowhat have they done to you?
( MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:31,
archived)
They done stapled my l'il fella against thingsWhich is not fluffy or niceness. =(
(,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:33,
archived)
bad staplescarry on not liking them
( MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever,
Sun 18 Jul 2004, 22:34,
archived)
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