I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF
IT WAS LIKE AN IRRESISTIBLE FORCE PULLING US TOGETHER
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:25,
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Her boyfriend is Russell Brand
He's not entitled to an opinion.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:39,
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Infectious diseases are the ultimate in sharing.
AIDS will one day unite is all in the harmony that can only come from everyone having AIDS.
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Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:27,
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God damn!
I saved this pic off the BBC site earlier, was gonna do my first ever b3ta photoshop with it! Pipped to the post!
Nicely done though, have a woo and a *click* :)
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Tue 1 Dec 2009, 11:11,
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Nicely done though, have a woo and a *click* :)
Hiya sweetchunks!
It's Len Fairclough off of 'Corrie' in the 70's. Bit of a 'Kiddy Fiddler' by all accounts
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Adamson#Allegation
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Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:04,
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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Adamson#Allegation
Really? Then all I ask for is a set of knuckledusters & five minutes alone with him in a soundproof room.
Unless he's dead.
In which case, huzzah!
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:07,
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In which case, huzzah!
TO-PIC-AL!
haha
I even remember the joke at the time about Mike Baldwin climbing a ladder outside Ken and Deirdre's house to see Deidre and Len Fairclough climbing it later to see Tracy.
God I feel old.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:25,
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I even remember the joke at the time about Mike Baldwin climbing a ladder outside Ken and Deirdre's house to see Deidre and Len Fairclough climbing it later to see Tracy.
God I feel old.
ummm dunno
In other news I've been made redundant for the 3rd time in 3 years. Do I win a prize?
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Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:05,
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Oh shit, sorry to hear that.
Seems to be a lot of it going round. Lots of people on QOTW saying their xmas pressie is a P45. I have been staring redundancy in the mouth for 2 years now (i've got used to it now).
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:10,
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worst time of the year for it
that's terrible fella
sorry to hear about that
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:11,
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sorry to hear about that
Kinda new it was coming
got some xmas pressies in for the kids already but it does mean bloody aldi frozen turkey again though. arghh
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:29,
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You have my sympathies & best wishes - which may not provide food or shelter, but are genuinely intended..
.. chin up, Boff.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:13,
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damn - not good.
get pro-active is the only thing I can recommend - get your CV to every company you can think of in your field whether they have jobs advertised or not
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:28,
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I just realised
she is Dilbert's mom
support.kdupg.edu.my/others/it%20humor/DILBERT/dilmom.gif
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:35,
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support.kdupg.edu.my/others/it%20humor/DILBERT/dilmom.gif
Are we Zalgoing on the second frame there?
Also, I would buy this game.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:04,
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parenting skills
Thanks for the wishes all. Past my bedtime! Gnite
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:54,
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Thanks for the wishes all. Past my bedtime! Gnite
haha, that's ace
unlike the show, which is dogshit telly at its worst
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:45,
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Reminds me of the sex tetris game doing the rounds on t'internet in 1997
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:45,
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The only way for this show to excite me would involve the use of acid instead of water, and razor-sharp metal instead of polystyrene..
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:04,
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Stupid Einstein forgets Burton's theory of cost increase versus ingredient reduction
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:39,
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You have to admit that Burton's theory doesn't take the Katie Price, or "Big Gob", variant* into account
I really don't mean variant but I can't think of the word I want... dammit! It's going to bug me until I get it
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:44,
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Gah!
It's the "variant". The bit of the formula which could be any (in this case) size in the world
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:48,
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But it can have imaginary size
Hahahahaha.
I'm going to commit suicide now.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:51,
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I'm going to commit suicide now.
no need to commit suicide, I'm sure the pitchfork waving crowd will be outside your window soon.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:53,
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Wagon wheels are smaller than they used to be. They used to be bigger than a normal biscuit
and available individually, but now there just normal biscuit sized and in packets of eleven.
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Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:45,
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OI!
According to that the Aussie wagon wheel is and always has been larger than the UK one! We're being ripped off!
(And kebab's got no fucking grounds for complaint. PAH. I'm going to write to the Daily Mail about this, I can tells yer that.)
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:51,
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(And kebab's got no fucking grounds for complaint. PAH. I'm going to write to the Daily Mail about this, I can tells yer that.)
"The biscuit itself is round to represent the wheel of a wagon (hence the name)."
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:51,
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*checks edit history*
I remember them at about 3 inches around so I stand corrected (although, I still haven't seen them in shops for ages)
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:56,
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If you think Wagon Wheel insertion will be more comfortable with lube, then yes.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:59,
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he forgot about the b3ta rulz of goatse proximity
1hand + anotherhand + circle = potential goatse
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:52,
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There used to be a rim on the Wagon Wheel that added extra dimension, but string theorists stole it away..
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:57,
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a sense of perspective?
other than those I can't think of anything.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:24,
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bumming leads to friction leads to heat leads to goatse-style hole :(
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:32,
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'cos I'm cruel
I'd make this 3D and insert it halfway through James Cameron's 3D version of Avatar and watch the audience shit their pance
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:28,
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haha
tape terrorists eyes open and force them to watch this 24/7
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:29,
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uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh,
uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh,
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:29,
archived)
SCIENCE.
BUT
What is the chap on the front cover of the frog's newspaper reading?
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 8:27,
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What is the chap on the front cover of the frog's newspaper reading?
needs more "this compo is shit" and
"my idea was better but nobody voted for it".
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 8:38,
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haha
www.b3ta.com/questions/imagechallenge/post571475
NOBODY VOTED FOR IT
This is a lie, it appears to have been fairly popular, but since Rob posted a shit idea just above it that no-one sane would have voted for, that's what got run.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:49,
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NOBODY VOTED FOR IT
This is a lie, it appears to have been fairly popular, but since Rob posted a shit idea just above it that no-one sane would have voted for, that's what got run.
Oh, it's NOSY wives
I saw this last week and thought it was NOISY wives, which made no sense but made me laugh
Now I get it, and I also laughed... again... er...
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 8:50,
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Now I get it, and I also laughed... again... er...
Ning!
TJ: I fking despair, I really do. I was asked to send a bunch of logos to a client via a third party, who has now replied asking fo them to be put in a word document before sending on. JUST SEND THEM AS I FKING SENT THEM. Why did I bother optimising and resizing them then?!
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:01,
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heheheh
the paaaaain
I had a technical manual to format the other day, from a very large automotive company, most of whose stuff is in Framemaker or ID
not this one - the fuckers had done it in Excel
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:12,
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I had a technical manual to format the other day, from a very large automotive company, most of whose stuff is in Framemaker or ID
not this one - the fuckers had done it in Excel
Then they'll come back and say
"these logos are rubbish quality. This work is appalling, we're not paying you"
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:12,
archived)
yep
and they'll upload them in the wrong aspect ratio.
"They look squashed"
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCC etc
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:19,
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"They look squashed"
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCC etc
word document?
Oh man!
I take it they're going to use them internally only and never have them commercially printed
Some people have NO idea
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:13,
archived)
I take it they're going to use them internally only and never have them commercially printed
Some people have NO idea
if this is too obscure
say so and I'll hack off a limb in apology
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 6:59,
archived)
BADGERS??
WE DON' NEED NO STEENKING BADGERS!
*whew...retains limb*
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 7:05,
archived)
*whew...retains limb*
I used to hear that on the radio
Al "Jazzbo" Collins said it all the time...
the original:
"Badges, to god-damned hell with badges! We have no badges. In fact, we don't need badges. I don't have to show you any stinking badges, you god-damned cabron and ching' tu madre! Come out there from that shit-hole of yours. I have to speak to you."
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stinking_badges &
www.rudebadmood.com/badges/index.shtml
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 7:41,
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the original:
"Badges, to god-damned hell with badges! We have no badges. In fact, we don't need badges. I don't have to show you any stinking badges, you god-damned cabron and ching' tu madre! Come out there from that shit-hole of yours. I have to speak to you."
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stinking_badges &
www.rudebadmood.com/badges/index.shtml
I've seen it used in a third movie (don't recall which)
and of course, parodied in many tv skits
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 7:47,
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Weid Al Yankovich
It was used in the movie UHF where the Mexican pet show host receives some erroneously delivered badgers. I'd bet your money (not mine) that the character was inserted into that movie just for the sake of that joke.
Well that line, and the one about terrapins being Nature's suction cups. *licks terrapins and throws them up out of camera shot to accompanying supup sounds* :)
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 8:44,
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Well that line, and the one about terrapins being Nature's suction cups. *licks terrapins and throws them up out of camera shot to accompanying supup sounds* :)
I am going to make a point of trying to squeeze the phrase erroneously delivered badgers in my presentation today
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 8:57,
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(inserted into that movie just for the sake of that joke) No doubt.
I don't recall the terrapin thing, but am now on alert :D
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:13,
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I'm good thank you!
I can rarely get on here these days due to office being moved around :(
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:50,
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no
edit: just an image I messed with--why that one, I can't recall
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 7:23,
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*peas badger pic*
i've not yet mastered pea roasting on the old mobile. :\
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 7:43,
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Happy Candle!
Please may I hijack your thread and invite all /boarders to this.
www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/21400
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 8:10,
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www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/21400
I've got nothing new in dom.
no reason posting my old shit over and over
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 5:41,
archived)
A pair of fine peas. Venus is perhaps best of show of anyone's efforts so far.
Mofaha's little girl, boy and dog being the front runner. My best so far I think is...
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 5:57,
archived)
The accordion should say BONER instead of HONNER.
just saying is all
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 6:59,
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I'll make that edit sometime
since you would prefer seeing a boner squeezed ;0
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 7:03,
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I can do that *
* grow a moustache.
Happy hydrocarbon incendiary device day!
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:59,
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Happy hydrocarbon incendiary device day!
oh nicholas
i only have 36 headshots to complete all challenges for the intervention :D
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:33,
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Nice!
I didnt use it at all. only the M21 and the barratt.
So far all I've used is the M4 and the USP. 4 bullet penetration away from extended mags and maxed apart from kills and headshots on it :D
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:36,
archived)
So far all I've used is the M4 and the USP. 4 bullet penetration away from extended mags and maxed apart from kills and headshots on it :D
Oh, the US of A
Americans keep shouting at me on xbox as I get lots of lag :(
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:45,
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I assumed you were nearby
because of something you said once. Don't recall now what that was.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 3:02,
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eek!
do you anything about the original image?
I want to know if that's a mummy or a statue
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:43,
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I want to know if that's a mummy or a statue
I'm really not though...
Only had half a bottle of Innis and Gunn.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:08,
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Only like, the best beer I've tasted.
It's the only beer aged in oak barrels apparently. It has an after taste of toffee... Phwoar.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:11,
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Oh, I like beer
But that stuff that looks and tastes like piss as Im a big fairy
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:12,
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Do you mean Fosters?
Because that does not deserve to be called beer.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:15,
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Yes, that kind of beer
I havent drank any beer in over a week :(
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:16,
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Im old... I need to drink less :(
And work more, and not stay up late and play xbox and stuff
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:17,
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Old? Pah. You're really very young compared to nearly everyone I spend time with at the moment!
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:22,
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It's not like it's a massive age different though.
Four years, that's all.
Us 18 year olds aren't bad, you know :)
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:34,
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Us 18 year olds aren't bad, you know :)
Anyway, I'm off to bed, you leaking vessel.
Catch you in a while :) x
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:38,
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some thooperdooper model
maybe a Victoria's Secret model?
I got the image from a paparazzi site
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:09,
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I got the image from a paparazzi site
I'm not what people would consider a 'dog person'
but yours looks like one I wouldn't mind sharing a roof with
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:16,
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it looks a bit like
that kid from the Cher movie about the kid that had a strange face.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:08,
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Strangely not...
I think it's because I died my hair dark again on the weekend, and it reminds me of the last time I was dark and back then I was on here aaaalllll the time. Getting back into character or something :P
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:55,
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Ill how?
I've got a mega sore throat. Makes me sound all sexy husky...
I think I ought to go to bed soon.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:01,
archived)
I think I ought to go to bed soon.
I don't have any corks
Just a toilet that I can run to when I need to
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:05,
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That feeling that your whole insides are going to drop out your arse is not something I would wish on anyone
least of all a poppet like you :(
Get well sooooon.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:07,
archived)
Get well sooooon.
Im going out for a nice meal tomorrow
I is having steak, hopefully that'll sort me out :D
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:08,
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Best of luck :)
Gonna have to buy me an awesome steak at some point soon, it's been too long.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 2:16,
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
no, hang on, I don't get it!
HAHAHAHAAHHAHA
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:12,
archived)
no, hang on, I don't get it!
HAHAHAHAAHHAHA
It's like he quickly swallows it, forces it through his system then they remove it from the other end..?
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:12,
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No actually he has a huge amount of them up his butt
and each time he swallows one it pushes out the next.
Probably...
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:17,
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Probably...
LOL!
There's nothing you can make up the interwebs can't provide for real anymore is there?
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:26,
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i worked in the beverage industry for a few years.
...giggled like a schoolboy whenever the maintenance guy would announce over the PA, "blow the pig on line 23"
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:28,
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I sincerely hope none of those have ever been inserted into people.
Also, where it says 'providing turnkey services' at the bottom, I read it as 'providing turkey services' and now I'm imagining that inside each pod thing, there is a beautifully cooked turkey that can be delivered at any time... *sigh*
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:27,
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who wouldn't enjoy the clean you can only get with the Super Javelina
The SUPER JAVELINA is totally covered with wire brush straps in a slight spiral pattern
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:32,
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I literally just shuddered at the thought of one of those up my poop-chute.
Although, I have always envied goatse's astonishing cleanliness and that might just be how he acheived it.
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:37,
archived)
They also use pigs in the oil industry, and those are REALLY large pipes...
( , Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:52, archived)
( , Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:52, archived)
...it would be cool to have a turkey shoot up out of your kitchen drain just minutes after ordering
( ,
Tue 1 Dec 2009, 1:33,
archived)
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