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[challenge entry] satire
(Frogcloset (noun), Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:54, archived)
# BEN BRADSHAW!
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:02, archived)
# RACIST.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:08, archived)
# Year for chumps!
(asciifaceofbob bob bob bob bob bob bob bob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:08, archived)
# This made me smile,
but you really need a comma in there ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:22, archived)
# Puns were funnier in the 80's
(mr_flibberly, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:53, archived)
# I like this :)
(I helped save b3ta! Rebel biscuit stercore sumus et nos esse novimus, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:16, archived)
# I like this too :)
(I helped save b3ta! Crystal Magnet Like a diamond geezer, but better, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:29, archived)
# This deserves a lot more comment :D
Utter brilliance!
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:30, archived)
# Heh heh
Heh.
(I helped save b3ta! brainstuff can eat a whole shredded wheat, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:58, archived)
# I got given an iPad today.
So I naturally got naked in the office and played with it.

Sadly there is no redtube, as it has no Flash.

Clearly NSFW - may contain elements of ME!ME!ME!ME!ME!

Also it is made of pine.
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:30, archived)
# LOLSOCKS!
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:32, archived)
# Army officer issue.
Specifically pulled up for that 'Scandinavian' feel.
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:33, archived)
# Naturally.
(I helped save b3ta! Kamikaze Stoat £4.09, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:34, archived)
# My fat gut
looks like a cheeky happy face.
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:35, archived)
# With gills.
(I helped save b3ta! Kamikaze Stoat £4.09, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:36, archived)
# Cthulu!
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:40, archived)
# So you got 4 iphones taped together and sold as a new product
Well done you!
(I helped save b3ta! epiphany coming live from sweden, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:35, archived)
# I haven't.
I have got a piece of pine with stickers, front and back.
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:35, archived)
# Oh, so you've got an ipad then
(I helped save b3ta! epiphany coming live from sweden, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:36, archived)
# ;)
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:41, archived)
# ipods. It lacks the basic features of a phone.
Mind, so did the iphone for a good while.
(I helped save b3ta! Kamikaze Stoat £4.09, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:38, archived)
# It's a pointless bit of kit anyway
(I helped save b3ta! epiphany coming live from sweden, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:39, archived)
# I have it on good advice
that if you aren't hyped up about the ipad, you aren't thinking about it hard enough.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:54, archived)
# So it's an ipod touch, but bigger?
(I helped save b3ta! epiphany coming live from sweden, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:56, archived)
# THINK HARDER
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:57, archived)
# actually that would be a good slogan
"Getting bored of our products? THINK HARDER ABOUT THEM, MORE OFTEN."
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:59, archived)
# I would buy *anything* based on this.
Anything.
(I helped save b3ta! brainstuff can eat a whole shredded wheat, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:53, archived)
# no
ipod touches have more functionality than ipads! ipod touches can actually run two applications at once! like listening to music while surfing for porn! can't do that on the ipad.
(I helped save b3ta! AgentMuu hentai coordination, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 20:13, archived)
# It's really a mirror with an apple logo stuck on the back, isn't it?
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:37, archived)
# No.
It is pine.
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:40, archived)
# Try not to get splinters
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:23, archived)
[challenge entry] TJ: just cos I'm bored
here's the b3ta election so far using the BBC's seat calculator



edit/ by the way, SOCKSY!
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:43, archived)
# Nicely.
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:44, archived)
# What I'd like to see is what the map would like
if it was coloured according everyone who came second.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:53, archived)
# don't forget that blue mixed with orange either equals black or it equals white
depending on whether you're using light or paint.

MAN THIS IS SO DEEP
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:56, archived)
# blue and orange with light
makes a pale pinkish purple.

With paint it makes a mucky brown.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:59, archived)
# cyan and orange make yellow with light
teal and orange make black with paint

SO DEEP
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:01, archived)
# err what no they don't
red and green make yellow with light.
cyan and orange make pale green.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:04, archived)
# STOP TRYING TO MESS WITH MY DEEP POLITICAL INSIGHT
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:16, archived)
# Sadly, I think you'd be disappointed to find
it would be very close to being just the exact opposite of this
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:56, archived)
# there'd be more Lib Dems, I suspect.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:00, archived)
# There'd be at least 17 more.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:03, archived)
# depends on the system used
in a literal what %age of the votes did they get system (which would never happen) they'd have got over twice as many MPs as they actually did in the last election
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:20, archived)
# I'm talking about how many constituencies they came second in at the last election.
The talk of any system other than what was used in the last election is meaningless.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:29, archived)
# My reply was to gronkpan (although I don't know if he was talking about PR or not)
It's difficult to find out the answer to your question without trawling through the results of all 650 constituencies, and I'm not that bored, but I refer the honorable lady to the answer I gave some moments ago - I think you'd be disappointed to find out how few that would be.

The relatively even geographical spread of Lib Dem support compared with the other two main parties means that PR is the only way they'd be likely to do much better than last time out
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:35, archived)
# I don't have enough knowledge of how your political system works to offer any real insight
I just thought it might be funny to offer an arbitrary number.

The number is: seventeen.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:38, archived)
# it's a good number
i like it
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:39, archived)
# I just did a little experiment with that toy though.
Giving 50% of the vote to one main party and 25% to the other two.

When Labour have 50% of the vote, they win 467 seats.
When Conservative have 50% of the vote, they win 450 seats.
When Lib Dem have 50% of the vote, they win 532 seats.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:39, archived)
# The problem with the lib dem section is that 'when' becomes 'if'.
Not trying to shit on anyone's parade, maybe this will encourage a few people.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:44, archived)
# I mean "when" as in "when I put those figures into the whatsit there", of course.
But it would be some good propaganda for them. It means a vote for Lib Dem isn't necessarily as wasted as a lot of people seem to think. Actually their biggest enemies seem to be the "others".
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:47, archived)
# You've made a lot of good points
I have to say though - there is no such thing as "good propaganda". It seems good when you agree with the message, but it is never good.

How do you fight two heavily financed propaganda machines? That's a tough one. Fighting it with propaganda just perpetuates the shit.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:51, archived)
# All political material is propaganda.
It's "good" if it gets people to vote for you.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:52, archived)
# Ok, rather than using the word "propaganda", try the eastern bloc term "transparisma"
I find it to be a bit more descriptive - transparent messages to gain power.

If you're going to put all political messages under the propaganda umbrella (even if, let's say for theory's sake, the vast majority of people voted with the exact message you were shouting), then let's differentiate propaganda from transparisma.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:58, archived)
# Google returns no results for "transparisma".
All political leaflets published by political parties are produced with the aim of convincing people to vote for them. They don't need to be lies as such, they only need to be persuasive in some way. It may simply rely on the audience's general tendency not to be very good at interpreting facts or understanding statistics.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:03, archived)
# sorry, I don't know how to spell it in cyrillic
I hope that doesn't get in the way of the concept
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:07, archived)
# I'm just a bit generally disappointed in the propaganda round here at the moment,
they're all of the form "Vote X, because if you vote Y, Z will win."

I'd rather see something more along the lines of "Don't be put off voting X by people who say they can't win."
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:10, archived)
# I live in a different country so my views are just those of an outsider looking in
That being said, Lib Dems in England have an uphill battle. There is no shame in being the underdog.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:14, archived)
# Yep, I agree to the tips of my toes
I've been telling Lib Dem organisers to stop banging on about two horse races and make some proper principled arguments. The whole point of being a Liberal is not being a reactionary arsecandle.
(I helped save b3ta! John Q Wagonwheel Spent, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:17, archived)
# All three of them are playing the "two horse race" card here at the moment.
It's insane. The latest Labour one tells me that the Conservative candidate is hoping I'll vote Lib Dem. I was kind of under the impression that he'd want me to vote Conservative. But I guess I may as well now, anyway. What are they trying to do here? Make me strategically vote Conservative? I'm sure as hell not voting Labour, because then the Tories will win!
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:24, archived)
# Labour think the Tories want you to split the Labour vote by voting Lib Dem.
Baffling logic thought up by constituency organiser drones. Surely people vote Lib Dem more because they hate both the Tories and Labour, or because they like our policies. Bizarre tactical voting is an illusion.
(I helped save b3ta! John Q Wagonwheel Spent, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:31, archived)
# The Tories aren't going to win here
unless almost everyone who voted Lib Dem last time switches parties. The idea that the Tory candidate is rubbing his hands at the thought of people switching from Labour to Lib Dem is completely absurd.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:39, archived)
# Ooh, isn't this the talking shop.
We've gone all heady and political. I think your estimates of percentage of vote/realistic seat share might be the wrong way round. But don't tell anyone, or they might do one of them 'tactical' votes.
(I helped save b3ta! John Q Wagonwheel Spent, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:58, archived)
# It's not my estimate.
The BBC did it.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:00, archived)
# Well, here are some other ones!
Currently it takes:

96,481 votes to elect a single Lib-Dem MP,

44,306 votes to elect a single Tory MP,

26,860 votes to elect a single Labour MP.
(I helped save b3ta! John Q Wagonwheel Spent, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:04, archived)
# that's that even geographic spread
The LDs will need 40% of the vote to win compared to Labour's 30% because Labour's support is concentrated in certain areas, however, the difference between 20% and 50% for the LDs is huge because they're spread out all over (really this just exposes how crude the BBCs toy is).
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:46, archived)
# The Guardian toy is quite good
But disturbingly inaccurate. Then again, all polls are.
(I helped save b3ta! John Q Wagonwheel Spent, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:00, archived)
# Ok I'm going to wade in here and suggest that the only important percentage is the one that GETS YOU THE SEAT.
I think British people have some weird dichotomy between "power thirsty bastards" and "our lords and ladies".

Don't like being called British? COMPLAIN TO YOUR LOCAL MP.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:41, archived)
# It's interesting to note how the Lib Dems are all on the coast
Oh they do like to be beside the seaside
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:02, archived)
# I'm surprised there aren't more Lib Dem voters on B3ta to be honest.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:08, archived)
# I am utterly opposed to PR
otherwise they are grand.
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:15, archived)
# same here...
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:17, archived)
# I'm very glad to hear this
For some reason everyone seems to spunk over PR and I've never liked the idea. I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one.

(Unless you refer to the Lib Dems. In which case... errr, I've only ever voted Lib Dem. :( I don't *like* them but I can't bring myself to vote Labour and am extremely unlikely to ever vote Tory.)
(I helped save b3ta! boris the spider, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:47, archived)
# I like Lib Dem only in the sense that I like them more than Labour and Tory,
and my decision to vote that way has more than a hint of strategy to it.

PR would turn the entire principle of democracy in this country upside-down.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:50, archived)
# DAMN RIGHT
I liked the Lib Dems better when they were pledging to raise taxes to cover their manifesto - it was refreshingly honest. Then unfortunately they started stabbing their leaders in the back until they got one who looks like a clone of David Cameron but is even more boring :( I like Charles Kennedy, I'd vote for him.

Disclaimer: I did actually vote for Menzies Campbell. If you live in North-East Fife you're more or less required to by law.
(I helped save b3ta! boris the spider, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:59, archived)
# Tax rises are still in there
50% top rate for those earning 150,000 or more.
(I helped save b3ta! John Q Wagonwheel Spent, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:06, archived)
# I like this
(Though I'd add that it's easier to promise tax rises when you know you're unlikely to get voted in and have to try and force it through. Still, I like it.)
(I helped save b3ta! boris the spider, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 18:01, archived)
# It's not so bad
The party just hasn't made the case for it properly yet. You'd think we'd have had long enough to do so. The Electoral Reform Society has a good little book on it though.

I may be a sad act.
(I helped save b3ta! John Q Wagonwheel Spent, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:55, archived)
# PR marks the death
of minority group representation, particularly for rural voters.
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:48, archived)
# The function of an MP is to represent his constituents in parliament,
not to represent his party in parliament and in his constituency. They may act like that already, but the problem would not be solved by embodying it in the constitution.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:55, archived)
# And PR allows for the election
of multiple parties of almost every viewpoint. You go to the representative you choose. It's no harder to stand as an independent. I think you've succumbed to a few PR myths here.
(I helped save b3ta! John Q Wagonwheel Spent, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 20:35, archived)
# Hahaha
:D
(herman:D, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:43, archived)
# Good lord man
you've ruined my eyes.

can you use two 'digits' at the same time?

and also i hope you disinfected that seat after that picture.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:43, archived)
# My nudity is photoshopped.
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:44, archived)
# how disappointing!

(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:49, archived)
# i bet you've gone all soft.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:51, archived)
# Yes, I was pretty close to vinegar too
I'd better dig out an old Cherie Blair pic to finish off over
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:53, archived)
# I'm not exactly sure what you're trying to show us with this post.

But clearly, it's art.
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:50, archived)
# I might not know much about art
but I know what I like.
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:04, archived)
# TGMTRFH
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:15, archived)
#
(iamgoingtohell, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:12, archived)
# Hahaha
Not that much of a new idealogy ideology though!
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:14, archived)
# ideology
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:21, archived)
# thankyou.
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:23, archived)
# thank you
;D
(I helped save b3ta! xihpete A neutrino walks straight through a bar, with v>c., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:25, archived)
# ha ha
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:26, archived)
# Thank you.
(I helped save b3ta! Just Flange, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:26, archived)
# Pedantic cunt.
:P
(I helped save b3ta! xihpete A neutrino walks straight through a bar, with v>c., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:22, archived)
# *flounces off*
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:28, archived)
# Regeneration cabbages!
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:16, archived)
# Arf!
Here's a not-worth-own-thread pic... the only candidate with green credentials...
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:17, archived)
# I trust him more like this
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:18, archived)
# *Zaps with distergrator ray on instinct....*
Bloody centre right Martians....
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:18, archived)
# Venusian, actually...
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Mekon
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:19, archived)
# Bloody hell!
I always assumed the green ones came from Mars
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:20, archived)
# A nice idea nicely executed
although not much basis in political fact
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:24, archived)
# nicely done
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 16:16, archived)
[challenge entry] For people too young to remember...
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:11, archived)
# nice bulge!

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:13, archived)
# Pffft
It was her handbag!
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:14, archived)
# A HAAAAANNNNNDBAAAAAAG?!?
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:17, archived)
# She's just had it stuffed

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:18, archived)
#
www.youtube.com/watch?v=oyuoUwxCLMs
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:23, archived)
# A haaandbaahahahahag?!

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:53, archived)
[challenge entry] heh heh
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:15, archived)
# clickety
how can people even contemplate voting for those bastards?
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:20, archived)
[challenge entry] Mostly cos they don't like those other bastards either.
Clearly we need constitutional reform to break away fomr the 2 party system in order to gain a more representative government in the future (although how the fuck the lib dems have failed to capitalise sufficiently over the last 20 years astounds me). That will not be achieved by voting Tory this time.


(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:24, archived)
[challenge entry]

(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:25, archived)
[challenge entry]
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:26, archived)
# This post from barryheadwound says it all, for me
www.b3ta.com/board/9994667
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:24, archived)
# indeed, very true
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:27, archived)
# Is that Gerry McCann?
Where's Maddie? I mean Maggie?!
(daunkle, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:54, archived)
# No it's David Cameron!!!!11!!!!
sauce
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:56, archived)
# Out-mutha fucking-standing.
(I helped save b3ta! The only Dave is pushing things forward, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 17:26, archived)
# Seeing as Lucy Pinder was giving £50s outside our window for Ladbrokes this morning
(I helped save b3ta! sepang 's favourite day is, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:38, archived)
# hoof!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:39, archived)
# Leg it!
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:41, archived)
# Filly boy.
(I helped save b3ta! Richard Shitheels, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:50, archived)
# Neigh, Sir - you may shout yourself horse but t'will never be so.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:57, archived)
# Haha glue
(I helped save b3ta! epiphany coming live from sweden, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:51, archived)
# It's funny because it's glue!

(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:14, archived)
# I'd love it if a glue manufacturer were to sponsor the Grand National.
That'd be fantastic.
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:17, archived)
# Something about glue.
:D
(I helped save b3ta! xihpete A neutrino walks straight through a bar, with v>c., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:24, archived)
# Westwood
(iamgoingtohell, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:29, archived)
# Is that the Thatcher?
Or Boy George?
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:32, archived)
# Boy Thatcher?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:33, archived)
# Tony Blair!
/lolotics
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:35, archived)
# Bummerbummerbummerbummerbummer cameleon*
*Cheri may not actually be a cameleon
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:38, archived)
# WHO'S IN THE HOUSE?
(I helped save b3ta! Richard Shitheels, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:35, archived)
# :)
b3ta.com/links/213517
(theswollenbeef where there's a will there's a wank, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:37, archived)
# O_O Fuuuuck.
(I helped save b3ta! Richard Shitheels, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:43, archived)
# Fucking hell


(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:13, archived)
[challenge entry] A vote for Fresh Water Mole is a vote for sanity

(apologies to FWM, etc...)
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:20, archived)
# *VOTES CHEDGE*
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:20, archived)
# horsecock
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:30, archived)
# *clicks*
COMPO IT!

(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:31, archived)
# Oh my fuck I love this :D
(I helped save b3ta! xihpete A neutrino walks straight through a bar, with v>c., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:27, archived)
# That appears to be
a Portmeirion Botanic Garden charger plate. Full of goodies. WHY isn't it on my desk?
(I helped save b3ta! wuffle, the b3ta bunny 's flea collar isn't working on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:55, archived)
# *VOTES*
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:21, archived)
# This has my vote
in the election of LIFE.

*clicks*
(I helped save b3ta! Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:28, archived)
# Jeremy should be given a full campaign.
(Blythy Pop Quiz Hotshot..., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:30, archived)
# :)
I &hearts Jeremy
(theswollenbeef where there's a will there's a wank, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:36, archived)
# WOOOO
Vote for jeremy!
(I helped save b3ta! Saner, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:05, archived)
# Hahahaha!
Silly horse!
:D
(I helped save b3ta! Fresh Water Mole loves his baby boy more and more every day, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 11:24, archived)
# minutes to spare
www.b3ta.com/newsletter/issue423/
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:13, archived)
# 1ST LOL
(I helped save b3ta! Richard Shitheels, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:13, archived)
# yeah baby.
(I helped save b3ta! HairyTwatter certified eel and sodium salesman, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:16, archived)
# If I wasn't between jobs with nothing better to do I wouldn't read this...
but as I've finished the BBC and TechRadar its all I have left
(Hockmiester Ka Ka, Tukki Tukki!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:18, archived)
# yay!
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:21, archived)
# And, prey, just what time do you call this?
Hmm? Hmm?

See me after class.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:26, archived)
# Oooooh! I take it all back cos I gots mentioned!
*Does the "I'm a media slag" happy dance*
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:33, archived)
# Oh well,
My song didn't get in :(

I can pimp it here, though: Trololo with English lyrics and me performing it, on location in my Moscow flat.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=83Gl6UnH-ZE
(I helped save b3ta! giant_squid, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:31, archived)
# This is brilliant!
You have the arm movements down, and are dressed appropriately :D
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:35, archived)
# Ta
:D
(I helped save b3ta! giant_squid, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:41, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:53, archived)
# lololol!
(I helped save b3ta! Crystal Magnet Like a diamond geezer, but better, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:15, archived)
[challenge entry] In Surrey, no one can hear you scream....
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:07, archived)
# Bloody hell, I'm just eating a sausage roll
you bastard!
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:08, archived)
# you are Happy Toast
AICMFP
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:09, archived)
[challenge entry] ew - at lunchtime?
also: not worth, etc...
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:13, archived)
# Haha I was just going to do that!
I mean photoshop that pic, not fellate our next PM, maiden!
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:16, archived)
# maiden?
I kind of rushed this, thinking it was only a matter of time before someone did it anyway.
Saved you the trouble, I suppose.
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:18, archived)
# Maiden, the b3ta user and part-time psychologist...
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:20, archived)
#
not me, no
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:21, archived)
# oh that's who you are
bloody confusing!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:25, archived)
# ?
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:27, archived)
# am I now doubly confused?
is monge, maiden?
Is it Friday yet?

edit: no, clearly not.
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:33, archived)
# Vote for Horsecock!
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:35, archived)
# It's nearly Saturday,
that's how Friday it is!
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:47, archived)
# haha vote plums
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:20, archived)
[challenge entry]
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:33, archived)
# Foiled again!

Click for bigger and 300+ more doofers.
(I helped save b3ta! Matazone has new icons, but is keeping this one, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:57, archived)
# Thor?
It wath bloody agony!
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:00, archived)
# Why do people always build tinfoil hats with a pointy antenna?
Surly that will only help. Someone needs to come up with a flat design.
(Hockmiester Ka Ka, Tukki Tukki!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:03, archived)
# Reserch has been done:
people.csail.mit.edu/rahimi/helmet/
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:04, archived)
# It's quite long. I may be a while
(Hockmiester Ka Ka, Tukki Tukki!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:06, archived)
# So actually tinfoil hats help rather than prevent. Another government trap and wasted blue peter hours.
(Hockmiester Ka Ka, Tukki Tukki!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:08, archived)
# Yep, that's the kicker.
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:11, archived)
# ha ha :D
On a more serious note though, I think I might have really started to develop a fear of lightning in real life :(
can anyone explain how phobias kick off in an otherwise healthy 30 year old chap.
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:03, archived)
# You're a mental.
$540 please.
Next.
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:12, archived)
# Ha ha thanks
You don't get that kind of honesty on the NHS
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:13, archived)
# you said 'otherwise' so what else is wrong
(Hockmiester Ka Ka, Tukki Tukki!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:14, archived)
# Catch-22
"Fear in the face of danger that is real (and immediate) is a product of a sane and rational mind"

Okay, so lightning isn't exactly immediate...
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:23, archived)
# You're getting old
and increasingly obsessed with your own mortality as your years run out. In particular, you're obsessing about risks to your mortality now that you no longer have the carefree attitude of your youth.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:40, archived)
# :D

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:06, archived)
# we are just the playthings of the Gods
bloody Gods
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:10, archived)
# and in 1991 the roles reversed for a short while.
Thank you bitmap brothers
(Hockmiester Ka Ka, Tukki Tukki!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:13, archived)
# Ouch I beth that twas a Thor-Point with you :D
:D
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:17, archived)
# That's great!
(I helped save b3ta! Crystal Magnet Like a diamond geezer, but better, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:18, archived)
# Ol' Man Sissy Pants


Click for bigger (54 kb)
Grow a pair, grampa!
(danielgoodm AntlerBoyStudios, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:41, archived)
# That grampa
Such a wuss.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:51, archived)
# oh yeah?
*wields knife and demands sex*
(I helped save b3ta! Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:53, archived)
# Oh shiney!
*gives sexing*
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:54, archived)
# hmm
that didn't work out as I planned

*limps away*
(I helped save b3ta! Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:58, archived)
# You scare me, dood.
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:06, archived)
#
Scared already? You're just like Ol' Man Sissy Pants, but worse!
(danielgoodm AntlerBoyStudios, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:08, archived)
# You don't know the half of it
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:11, archived)
# That implies one can have sex without wielding a knife...
Will wonders never cease?
(I helped save b3ta! Foxglove -- it all ends in tears anyway..., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:14, archived)
[challenge entry] One year, someone needs to have this slogan. Logic dictates that they will win.
(__, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:40, archived)
[challenge entry] IT'S A TRAP!

(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:44, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:45, archived)
# hahahhaha! I just imagine him saying "Woah, I think this shit just kicked in!"
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:46, archived)
# Haha

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:07, archived)
[challenge entry]
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:36, archived)
# You can choose my plums any day, love.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:36, archived)
#
these just get more and more funny, always worth a new thread when you've got a tired and repetitive idea
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:36, archived)
# one more
and you'll win twenty quid
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:38, archived)
# Yay for Plums :D
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:38, archived)
# bah, I've already pledged my vote to melons.
;D
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:38, archived)
# It's all good and sweet in the Fruitist Society
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:39, archived)
# not if you voted "Gooseberry"
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:41, archived)
# Yes that's true you'd be a 'fool' to vote for that faction
:D
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:43, archived)
# well, they'd get their just desserts
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:44, archived)
# And would 'crumble' under the weight of public opposition
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:46, archived)
# true, but as they have they fat little fingers in all the pies, it would matter not, to them
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:48, archived)
# Then we simply put them in 'custardy' :D
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:49, archived)
# Then they'd be in a jam.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:51, archived)
# Well, I'm discustard with all the candieddates, they're just a bunch of tarts
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:51, archived)
# Pastry-faced wimps, the lot of them.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:53, archived)
# Bet they'd turn straight to jelly if they got any power.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:55, archived)
# They'd certainly be reduced in such a sticky situation.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:56, archived)
# Silly Prodigy!
Plums cannot hold pen, how can they vote!
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:39, archived)
# YES!
I withdraw my vote for fish and I'm voting plums instead!
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:45, archived)
# Fish and plums is there a pattern emerging here?
or is it just my dirty mind ;)
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:47, archived)
# and Melons
don't forget melons
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:48, archived)
# I did not vote for melons
but perhaps I should've.
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:49, archived)
# Very interesting that you should find melons abhorent yet you're all for the Plums and Fish
:D
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:51, archived)
# o_O
*hides back in the closet*

(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:53, archived)
# Shut it, Sigmund!
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:48, archived)
# I sense a recurring theme in your electioneering
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:47, archived)
# Vote vote vote...
It's always vote with his electioneering!
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:49, archived)
[challenge entry] Ahh bless.........


Click for bigger (50 kb)
(RobertSmith'sHair I'm only here because they found me., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:20, archived)
# I've no idea either
I'm troubled by the idea whoever I vote for one of these twunts will be elected - I feel so frustrated that my vote won't make one jot of difference.
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:29, archived)
# I'm a lot more shallow than that
I'm troubled that Rob never manages to release the newsletter in time for lunch these days :-(
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:34, archived)
# We should stage a revolution and overthrow the Rob Oligarchy!
"What do we want? Newsletter out on Time! When do we want it? Errr... on time?"
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:36, archived)
# I once went on a Legalise Cannabis march - that was irony defined:
"What do we want?!"

"Legal cannabis!"

"When do we want it?"

"Erm ... as soon as you can ... please ... cheers ... hey! Who's hungry?"
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:39, archived)
# Yay!
We can vote in a NEW Rob!

Everyone called "Rob" - stand for nominations please and tell us what YOU will do for US.

Or we could have a coup and install in a team of military Robs. They will do what needs to be done.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:43, archived)
# Militarised, weapons-grade Robs.
Like it, centurion, like it.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:44, archived)
# And they'll be famed for On-Time (OT) newsletters
RobOTs, we should call them.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:48, archived)
# and we could fly them around over Jamaica
Making them RobOTs in de skies.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:52, archived)
# pffft...
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:56, archived)
# I say put rail transport first.
Trains foremost. RobOTs in de skies.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:02, archived)
# Tony, Tory, Tony, Tory...
They look almost the same. Coincidence?
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:46, archived)
# PoliticLols
(I helped save b3ta! NinjaBadger hides in the bushes and gives you TB., Sun 11 Apr 2010, 17:24, archived)
# y'know? I love to stay bang up to date with the News...
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:02, archived)
# Ummm....
Errr...
(SpangleDangle >->)))'>, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:03, archived)
# 0_0
I am expecting a gimpsuited man-bear with a 11" cock wearing a rubber David Kelly mask to step out from behind the curtain any second...
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:03, archived)
# *wonders if ^that^ will be my random quote on the stats board...*
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:08, archived)
# haha
but it only uses subject lines I think
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:10, archived)
# I am expecting a gimpsuited man-bear with a 11" cock wearing a rubber David Kelly mask to step out from behind the curtain any second...
like this?
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:16, archived)
# ha ha
You've made it all your own :D
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:18, archived)
# haha
Cherie is just out of shot in her 'gear'
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:05, archived)
# we do not need to see this
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:05, archived)
#
not
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:06, archived)
# we don't?
*stops Googling....*
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:07, archived)
# I beg to differ
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:08, archived)
# your all gay
all of you
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:10, archived)
# Your mother's gay.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:11, archived)
# Your Marvin Gaye
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:14, archived)
# Sitting on the Dock of the Bay watching the Rain again?
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:15, archived)
# GAY!

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:17, archived)
# Sitting on the cock of the gay.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:35, archived)
# and so is her Wife!
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:15, archived)
# Oh
My
God...


Also:
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:15, archived)
# which part of it, the bad pun, or the naked Blair?
:D
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:18, archived)
# Everything!
*puts head in washing machine on boil-wash*
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:19, archived)
# *takes advantage*
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:30, archived)
# good lord!
Mind if I join you in the Washing Machine?
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:27, archived)
# Most certainly. *sets for extra rinse*
:)
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:28, archived)
# think I need to rince my head
I've still got the most excruciating headache
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:31, archived)
# *drops monocle*

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:45, archived)
# What a lovely pair of tits
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:48, archived)
# stretching the truth...
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:47, archived)
# strangely
pleasing to my eyes
(I helped save b3ta! beaubodor blogless, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:52, archived)
# Noons' :D


Inspired by the previous punnage..
(I helped save b3ta! w00tAlohrs Où peux-je cacher ces noix de coco?, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:44, archived)
# Ew - Heman's clutching his number two.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:45, archived)
# haha
Dave's getting all hiphop with the kids (front page of BBC news)
newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/47614000/jpg/_47614509_newcameronlong_ap.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:58, archived)
# Davey Cam droppin top style on the grand slam
Pickin up votes like pimpin out bitches Dave Cam's party got the finest stiches which you paid for, mug, 'cos 'ees a robber a teef an you'll know when he's around because he ain't beyond belief.

Or something.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:02, archived)
# I just can't stand that bloke
I mean, I can't stand ANY of them but he's just a twat. I can at least appreciate why people voted for blair the first time, as he came across as being ok, before being outed as a twat. Cameron has skipped that stage.
(I helped save b3ta! Victor Meldrew, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:04, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:46, archived)
# He-Man was well written
It had a super script.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:46, archived)
#
I didn't get the last one either, but woo for He-Man Friday
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:46, archived)
# Deary me...
:)
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:47, archived)
# oh lord
*spangs*
(I helped save b3ta! the wub - guide onion for the blind, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:50, archived)
# The power of two-do?
(I helped save b3ta! joefish It's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:50, archived)
# oh good lord
TJ for maths people:

if 58% of people read a newspaper in 1994
and only 34% of people read a newspaper in 2008

what is the decline (as a percentage) - my brain says 24% but I bet it isn't

(I last did maths in 1988)
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:54, archived)
# Lobster over Wednesday multiplied by Green.
Take the remainder, multiply the second and invert the answer to get the full, "freshly-washed stoat" feel.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:55, archived)
# this is for a high-level presentation
I don't think they want anything about stoats


I'll put a weasel in
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:58, archived)
# This diagram should help:
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:58, archived)
# ooh
I think stoat will go down better then
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:00, archived)
# And you can tell just by looking that that stoat is freshly washed.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:09, archived)
# I say! :O

Have this pea
(AceFox may contain traces of nut..., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:55, archived)
# 41.4 percent decline
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:56, archived)
# correct
although only about 64% of those who read newspapers in 1994 are still reading newspapers in 2008
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:56, archived)
# Hmmm..
Im guessing perhaps the decline would instead be what percentage of the people who read papers stopped reading them.. so you would need to consider the drop there not just the difference between the two numbers. Don't make me work it out please :P
(I helped save b3ta! w00tAlohrs Où peux-je cacher ces noix de coco?, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:57, archived)
# 58/100 = 0.58
34/0.58 = 58.6206896551724137931034483 (confusingly)
100 - 58.6206896551724137931034483 = 41.3793103448275862068965517, so I guess that's the decline as a percentage.
(_Felix 's school of dance and occult sciences, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:57, archived)
# that's what I said, although I rounded up to 41.4
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:59, archived)
# Yeah but you didn't show your working
:P
(I helped save b3ta! The Coast Of Yemen, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:00, archived)
# And I provided my doings.
No wate what's the word ... workings.
(_Felix 's school of dance and occult sciences, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:00, archived)
# Well I'm autistic, I have no idea how I got the answer - I just did.
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:05, archived)
# oo ta
and thanks monge

(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:05, archived)
#
you're welcome, but I can imagine why you might not have trusted the answer without the doings
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:07, archived)
# no but the question
states 58% and 34% of people - if there are 100 people, 58 of 100 read in 1994 and 34 of 100 in 2008 meaning a drop of 24% - whatever the value is for people is 100%, and the percentage decline relates to this value
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:09, archived)
# wrong
there is a decline of readership of 41.4%
24% less of the population now read a paper
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:14, archived)
# the question doesn't state whether its readership or population
just asks for the decline, so both are right
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:16, archived)
# Mighty Nibus asked for the decline.
And clearly demonstrated the ability to subtract 34 from 58, so I'm pretty sure the answer to his question is 41.4%.
If it's for a presentation, he probably shouldn't say 'it is both 41.4 AND 24 percent'.
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:21, archived)
# so because he got 24%
the answer must be 41.4%? Nibus I think he's calling you thick
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:26, archived)
#
okay, let's split the difference - the answer is 32.7%
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:36, archived)
# I can't decide
if you know I'm being silly or if you're getting wound up
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:40, archived)
# I can't decide if you think 32.7 was a serious sugestion :)
edit for clarity: no, I wasn't taking it seriously - I'm glad I correctly assumed that you weren't either.
Nibus clearly lost interest some time ago...
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:41, archived)
# Yep, that could be right too
sometimes I see BBC news articles treat a percentage drop in this way and I get confused, but they're an official national institution and hardly ever make lots of typos so it must be a valid way to do it.
(_Felix 's school of dance and occult sciences, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:15, archived)
# the percentage decline is the percentage decline of the percentages.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:15, archived)
# if Percentage Decline is the name of a mathematical rule
then it should have captials, and not be written in lower case where it could be misinterpreted and generalised
I stopped doing Maths after GCSE, but I have an English degree so I'm now attempting to baffle you mathematicians with linguistics
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:25, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:32, archived)
# percentages of percentages
there could be MORE people reading the newspaper, if the population has increased enough

percentages of percentages are always a bit meaningless
(Darth Vodka, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:54, archived)
# HI IM SKELETOR
(I helped save b3ta! pzyko Query failed., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:57, archived)
[challenge entry] Cowardly, heartless idiots.
(I helped save b3ta! An Eagle in Your Mind, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:42, archived)
# nice work
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:43, archived)
# excellent!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:44, archived)
# Ooo, lovely work
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:44, archived)
# this is brilliant
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:44, archived)
[challenge entry] very good
Brown makes a very good cowardly lion.

But there's only one way to settle this election, the Queen calls CONKERS!

(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:44, archived)
# At lest the Queen's right masectomy went well
(I helped save b3ta! @><|= w0nu!) or cunt to my friends, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:04, archived)
# :o!

(I helped save b3ta! w00tAlohrs Où peux-je cacher ces noix de coco?, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:46, archived)
# Cameron's no Friend of Dorothy
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:48, archived)
# Lovely stuff!
The Clegg one works way too well.

:D
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:48, archived)
# ha!
a brain!
a heart!
the nerve!
(I helped save b3ta! pzyko Query failed., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:00, archived)
# nicely
..
(I helped save b3ta! beaubodor blogless, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:53, archived)
# ha ha
very nice!
(I helped save b3ta! @><|= w0nu!) or cunt to my friends, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:04, archived)
[challenge entry] 0_o
(I helped save b3ta! brown-wings Made with three kinds of butter, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:33, archived)
# Ooo, nine votes? That's lovely, do you have a big family?
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:35, archived)
# Wish I'd thought of that
Would have been a good punchline *sighs*
(I helped save b3ta! brown-wings Made with three kinds of butter, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:36, archived)
# ninja it
then delete your post above
then we can all call Tribs a twat for repeating the joke
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:39, archived)
# Oft imitated, seldom funny, that's me!
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:41, archived)
# haha
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:44, archived)
# haha
nice phone Griffin.

also - is anyone here thinking of standing as an MP in the future? Be warned!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:37, archived)
# Fantastic. :)
What a genius.
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:40, archived)
# The People's Favourite*
*may not be The People's Favourite
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:23, archived)
# No... can't see what you've done.
At least it's not Widdecombe *shudder*
(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:24, archived)
# I'm working on another...
*sings* "Especially for youuuuuuu..."

;-)

Edit: The arm took way too long to do.
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:25, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:38, archived)
# make it spin! make it spin!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:38, archived)
#
It will be tomorrow and no-one would understand by the time I managed that :(
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:40, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:48, archived)
# That's about right, actually; He would just
love to spend all day licking himself.
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:51, archived)
# That
has has made me reach for the mind bleach
(I helped save b3ta! Traducer, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:21, archived)
# sorry
(Rattlehead all time with the gay, forever touching, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:29, archived)
# o_0
Ye gods...
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:30, archived)
# oh my
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:31, archived)
# oh good god
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:34, archived)
# It can be hard to realistically draw cum
I know, I've tried it.

But you have succeeded where others failed.
(I helped save b3ta! brown-wings Made with three kinds of butter, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:35, archived)
# I tend to have no problem in drawing cum
unless I've a had a few drinks
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:38, archived)
#
drawing drinking
a few drinks some draw
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:40, archived)
# ew!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:43, archived)
# yeah - here's my effort...


(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:41, archived)
# be honest
that's a photograph of the original that you did a tribute on
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:45, archived)
# Ewwwwwww!
'did a tribute'

*bokes*
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:47, archived)
# haha
www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=tribute%20wank
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:48, archived)
# Oh lord, no....
:(
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:50, archived)
# nice, but why the hell would I want to:
"buy tribute wank mugs, tshirts and magnets"
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:53, archived)
# that's grasping for income!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:04, archived)
#
oof
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:09, archived)
#
busted
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:47, archived)
# shopped images only please etc
I'm looking forward to his cartoon
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:24, archived)
# *ahem*
cartoon untimely death
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:26, archived)
# The cartoon is pretty awful
It's well designed, but a cartoon of a podcast is just rather dull.
(I helped save b3ta! Scrambled Edd www.eddsworld.co.uk, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:31, archived)
# Hahahaha!
Probably the only time I've laughed at Gervais.
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:29, archived)
# :)
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:29, archived)
#
NSFL
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:38, archived)
# Oh, bloody hell....
Mindbleach, please nurse!
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:41, archived)
# FUCK

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:53, archived)
# Top of the gnops!
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:46, archived)
# Mr Cre!
How's the world with you - all well I hope?
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:49, archived)
# Yeah, not too shabby

Up for a job interview in a couple of days, and enjoying my motorcycle lessons ;)
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 12:52, archived)
# Fingers crossed for you, sir!
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:02, archived)
# Cheers

How are you doing? Back in that London?
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:04, archived)
# I am indeed.
Safely back in the metropolis, thanks be!
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 13:21, archived)

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