*farts*
So, what's everyone's favourite lollipop flavour?
( Comma, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:40, archived)

Lemony!!!

(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:41, archived)

good ship

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:42, archived)

Salted beef

( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:42, archived)

Your cunt

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:44, archived)

*spreads legs*
Lick me.
( Comma, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:45, archived)

Hundreds and thousands?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:46, archived)

that's the yeast

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:49, archived)

then me please :)

(Borderline Schizo, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:47, archived)

*videos*

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:48, archived)

No

(0800221155 Coldseal windows, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:51, archived)

hmmm
made a lot of cash on monopoly live today

*runs*
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:25, archived)

I don't understand it,
do you have to wait entire days to see what happens?
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:26, archived)

did you fund some nasty blowing up things?
with your ill gotten gains
( Dill, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:26, archived)

I made a fair bit on celebdaq overnight
thanks to Prince William :)
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:27, archived)

What's he done?
Wanked a goat?
( Comma, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

Fuck knows..
but his price went up
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

wouldn't be the first time
?
( Dill, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

I have made billions
It gets me hard.

As do you.

*breathes*
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

*sedates*

(s0WmVHAwZgpG, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:39, archived)

Hullo all
Currently delving into my first ever imageready animation! it's all done, but when i come to save it, it comes up with a message saying "because jpeg, png and wbmp do not support animation, imageready will only save the currently selected frame". I am almightily confused, nay, terrified, and ever so slightly annoyed (its taken me ages to figure this out). Could any of you lovely people give me an idea as to what to do?
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:18, archived)

Hello
Would you like to see puppies?
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:19, archived)

Oooh, fluffy ones?
Preferably fluffy ones, thankyou.
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:20, archived)

They are in my shed in the woods
just follow me
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:22, archived)

pssst Mykey
I've put the axe under the box of acid behind the lawnmower
( Dill, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:24, archived)

We can make our 'special' soup:)

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:27, archived)

I've got just the thing to stir it
un-zips
( Dill, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:28, archived)

I'll start preparing the cream

( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:28, archived)

careful
don't spill any
( Dill, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

Don't worry,
my aim has improved a lot.
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:33, archived)

Hmmm......
.....
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:25, archived)

save it as a .gif
it'll be under 'save as', or export or some crazy jive
(Naughty Tortoise, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:22, archived)

Alas
When I do that, it only gives me the options to save as html or jpeg. Thats when I go to "save as optimised". when i go to just plain old save as, it comes up with only psd.

*tears hair out*
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:24, archived)

in the optimise window you can change it to gif,
then save optimised
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:25, archived)

*light comes on*
aaaah....thankyou! watch the board,it'll be up in a short while : )

also- how do i make sure size and so on are all acceptable?
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:26, archived)

the other options on optimize,
less colours and more lossy = lower file size,

just fiddle with them all till you like it
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

Hmmmm
HSF^tm
(Naughty Tortoise, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:25, archived)

It needs to be a .gif,
but I use Animation Shop so fucked if I know what you have to do.
( Comma, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:23, archived)

Go to Window (top) and make sure Optimize is ticked then look at that window.
Click the Preset box to change the quality settings. When it looks OK, go to File - Save Optimized As...
( chobb ,ø¤ºGREATº¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºRAPISTº¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºRECOMMENDEDº¤ø, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

My call centre closed because although they've been trying to filter out London numbers
some were still getting through and it's not nice.

They've sent us all home 4 hours early

/edit: it must be serious. They're extending the 6 o'clock news for it so they can tell us what happened...
( Shoosh up your lips Not state-funded, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:45, archived)

'Hello, im calling from Norwich Union insurance'
'Did you know accidents can happen at anytime and if you or a member of your family are suddenly injured in an accident...*beeeep*'
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:47, archived)

hehehe Just so you know, I don't enjoy my work.
( Shoosh up your lips Not state-funded, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:50, archived)

Don't worry, you can consolidate
all your crap little jobs into one easy-to-manage monthly crap job... ;-)
(dognutz, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:15, archived)

I know i have

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:16, archived)

Imodium
is wonderful stuff
(dognutz, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:17, archived)

What does your call centre call about?

( Dugs - The artist formerly known as Dugsybaws, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:50, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/625058
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:51, archived)

My bandage is fine
It doesnt need bumming
( Dugs - The artist formerly known as Dugsybaws, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:52, archived)

Card protection
and identity protection and home assist and key cover.

We also activate one of the bank's debit cards.

As I say, I don't really enjoy it (mainly because of the people we talk to)
( Shoosh up your lips Not state-funded, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:57, archived)

And on that note, I'm going back to my hotel for some tournedos
au revoir b3ta
( Dugs - The artist formerly known as Dugsybaws, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:00, archived)

Someone misses his bah-WOON:
www.b3ta.com/board/ (compo entry halfway down)
I feel awed by the sheer spasticity of it.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:43, archived)

Pffft
BIGGER!
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:45, archived)

whoa
we're going to need a bigger board
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:47, archived)

Jesus
Couldn't he have made them any bigger?

I think the lad has been well and truly inspired by this compo.
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:48, archived)

It pleases me that he hasn't let the fact he's only got MS Paint dampen his enthusiasm.
It should win some award for 'most unintentionally funny post of the year' or something.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:51, archived)

10 out 10 for effort though

( Dugs - The artist formerly known as Dugsybaws, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:52, archived)

To be honest nothing on there made me pfft.

( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:55, archived)

I say we breed them out:)*
www.muslimfriends.com/?tid=122


*This post is not meant to offend anyone in any way shape or form or discriminate
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:39, archived)

SHE'S WEARING A TOWEL!
*This post is not meant to offend anyone in any way shape or form or discriminate
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:40, archived)

Are you going to add
that line to every one of your posts?
( diffy maybs, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:41, archived)

Well it is a litigious(sp?) society

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:42, archived)

I'm not sure even the hyperactive bawbags of the b3tan males
could outbreed 1.3 billion of them.

*pulls up britches and cocks ten-gallon hat*

But we can damn well try.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:43, archived)

Im up for it

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:44, archived)

Me too.
*loves teh dusky laydees*
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:47, archived)

Mmm husky ladies

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:48, archived)

ladies
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:48, archived)

*dies fwapping and happy*
images.google.ch/images?q=queen+rania&ie=ISO-8859-1&hl=en&btnG=Search+Images
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:52, archived)

*joins you*

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:54, archived)

bah
what's wrong with pale-skinned and freckly?
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:00, archived)

Nothing, in itself.
I'm all for diversity*.
But you have to admit, she's a sweetie.


*amongst a pile of women involved in a depraved lesbian orgy
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 18:02, archived)

Ok my foriegn food bitches
Anyone tell me what a "tornedo" is and should I order it for dinner tonight? I asked a few guys here and they wouldn't tell me what part of the cow it's from.

I'm scared it's a arsehole or a hacky-sack.

Google didnt provide me with much help
( Dugs - The artist formerly known as Dugsybaws, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:37, archived)

it's MEAT! what more do you need to know??
(it's fillet or sirloin or ribeye and it's spelt tournedos which is probably why google didn't help)
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:40, archived)

Ahhhh!
Damn those French attempts at writing a menu in English


/edit - Oooh! They look nice. Thats my dinner sorted
( Dugs - The artist formerly known as Dugsybaws, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:40, archived)

Tournedos with an s.
/Le pendent
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:42, archived)

oh bumbandages

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:44, archived)

This is an egotistical post just to say:
BYE! I'M GOING HOME!
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:33, archived)

Cheerio

Blair has quite a good suntan.
( Smokey Bacon Crisps smell good, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:34, archived)

well thank fuck for that
now that he's gone we can get out the booze and strippers
( VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:34, archived)

I misread that as
eat the booze and strippers
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:38, archived)

Buh-buy!
*presses face to the window to watch you leave*
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:34, archived)

window underside of the coffee table
leave do your dirty business
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:38, archived)

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?
THE POPE?
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:36, archived)

I'm already home
and I want to be well enough to go out
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:39, archived)

Right I'm going down the pub
I shall return later drunk and then fuck you all up the arse with a broom handle...

Cheerio
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:29, archived)

can you make sure it's a plastic one please?
I don't want to get splinters
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:31, archived)

first no bacon
and now no arse-splinters?

what kind of a sick deviant are you??
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:32, archived)

some kind of hippie
by the sounds of it
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:43, archived)

*waits impatiently*

( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:31, archived)

Way ahead of you pisswimp

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:32, archived)

I'm so sick an tired of being reasonable.
I was just on the main board for ages getting really bogged down in a big politcal debate. So I put it to you, ladles and jellymen: who is best, East or West?

Hint: we get to eat bacon, drink teh booze and perv at girls in skimpy tops in the summertime.

(editorial note: this post is not intended as incitement to a serious debate)
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:17, archived)

oh
I thought you meant london.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:18, archived)

as soon as people stop trying to compare two items and decide which is best, the better.

it doesn't matter.
each to their own.
( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:19, archived)

Note my edit.
Come on though...bacon...
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:19, archived)

but bacon is manky
and so is tea
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:22, archived)

You have no place on this board
Go....and never return...

*shuns*
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:23, archived)

She was one of us


*also shuns*
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:24, archived)

*cries*

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:29, archived)

And I thought were such a nice, normal girl.
You'll be telling me you don't like fun next...
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:23, archived)

well
many people don't like what I consider fun...
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:27, archived)

You must buy me that dogging tshirt

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:29, archived)

But without bacon, there
would be no norks.*

*WARNING: May contain spurious premises.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:24, archived)

I haven't eaten bacon
in probably about 17 years
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:28, archived)

You must have eaten LOADS before then.
You have camel tits.
AICMFP.*

*...fondle, please.


( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:30, archived)

camel tits?
NSFW
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:33, archived)

OMG THATS SO OBSEEN!!!11
CALL TEH POLICE ITS PEADOFILES!!11!
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:36, archived)

tea is shit
bacon kicks arse.
( asparagus time Is in Brazil., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:29, archived)

Up yours, Johnny Foreigner!
*slurps for En-ger-land*
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:33, archived)

Pork is the future
See

www.infinitytrading.com/pork_belly_futures_options.htm
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:21, archived)

*Porks*

( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:24, archived)

I have to say west
but even with all that lovely Bacon we still those fucking frogs just over the way...
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:21, archived)

I guess that you mean middle east
and not the lands of sex tourism and heroin?
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:22, archived)

Norwich?

( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:24, archived)

Sex tourism in Norwich
is Sunday lunch round your mum's.
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:26, archived)

*rifles through knicker drawer while Mum's stirring the gravy*


yes, 'stirring the gravy' could be euphemism
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:31, archived)

I mean 'East' in the 'lazy fuckwit journalist' sense
of the 'the Islamic world in general'.

But Hindus are forbidden from eating burgers, so it might as well go for them as well.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:25, archived)

Not true
They can eat veggie burgers


/Irritatingly pedantic
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:28, archived)

ly pedantic
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:28, archived)

Its almost like you want to die horribly:)

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:30, archived)

Fred West!
He da best!
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:23, archived)

He fucks girlies
With sliced off breasts.

*feels ashamed of self*
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:26, archived)

BOOBIES!
*turns into a political debate*
( MrA, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:23, archived)

I live in the
East midlands, which is way better than the West midlands. Depends where you are standing though, if you are on the west coast of Wales, Birmingham is east etc.

Personally though, all foreigners are cunts as are half the indiginous population.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:24, archived)

west
practically no contest
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:27, archived)

SPACE!
You can do all those things WHILE FLOATING IN PURE SCIENCE!
( Kamikaze Stoat £4.09, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:34, archived)

thus it is
thus, and thus it has allways, and ever have been! thus!
( slippery doctore, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:11, archived)

why oh why oh why
can't I post anything to this board this afternoon???? aaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!!!

[edit] apparently I can, though this post is timestamped 17.09 and the page didn't finish loading on my PC until 17.16...
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:09, archived)

eerrrrr
you just did.
( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:11, archived)

Unless this post is a figment of my imagination
have you not just done so?

/confused
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:12, archived)

I have vodka:)
This makes me a happy bunny:)
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:14, archived)

I have the pox.
This makes me an itchy monkey.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:16, archived)

I have another 2 hours 45 minutes at work
This does not even make me slightly turgid.
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:17, archived)

Even with a bevvy of Belgian beauties
to fwap over?
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:20, archived)

Most of the nice ones have gone home already
*wanks dispondantly in the direction of the less unattractive people left*
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:24, archived)

*middle-aged, male manager wonders why Lonewolf is staring so intently at him*

( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:27, archived)

I don't know
but I just managed to colour in my eye with eyeliner...it hurts :(
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:12, archived)

strange
colour.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:14, archived)

?
Je ne comprends pas.
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:15, archived)

nicole

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:16, archived)

PAPA!

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:16, archived)

PISS ON MY MIND!

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:17, archived)

ewww
I know they were depraved but watersports.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:20, archived)

BAN THIS SICK FILTH!

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:20, archived)

THIS SICK FILTH BAN!

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:21, archived)

Papa?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:17, archived)

*pisses on your mind*
...although not much. It was a pretty fucking obvious response.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:21, archived)

english pedants
edit edit: ok here we go:

i need some advice.
i'm writing a letter to ask studios for a job.
would you consider the following to be too informal or otherwise inappropriately written?

hamsterfight.co.uk/drafts/sjl.html

i need to put across some personality in this letter, since i'm sure they'll just bin it if they read a bog standard generic opening paragraph.
( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

you
should put at the bottom.

p.s I have enclosed a fiver.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:55, archived)

fiver picture of me doing a "goatse"
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:57, archived)

quess
it depends on which job is being applied for.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:00, archived)

I have 6 years of experince in recording audio to computer based systems, using various PC and Mac software
(Uncle Vinnie, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:55, archived)

thank you
edit: fuck my CV had lots of spellign mistakes in it - i've got them all now ;)
( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:56, archived)

You're welcome. Also...
"I hold a batchelors degree"

This should this be "bachelor's" (unless you did a degree in Super Noodles).
(Uncle Vinnie, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:59, archived)

I would *be* grateful?
In case you hadn't noticed...
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:00, archived)

delete it all and write:
"they said it all in Spiderman, ciao"
( mrlogic is copying your beard, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:55, archived)

you have been
"....main engineer or nearly two years"?

the rest of it sounds good to me though :)
( robh, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:56, archived)

thanks

( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:59, archived)

I think saying you are a 'sound' engineer is too informal, no matter how hip you want to look.

edit: Batchelors is wrong I think.
(stop looking at my goats you bag of spunk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:56, archived)

yes it is, i've corrected it now.
( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:00, archived)

What is wrong with sound engineer?
I have a friend who is a sound engineer, it is a proper job title. There are only so many things you can call it, none of which detract from, or add to his worth as a potential employee.
( Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:04, archived)

'Sound'
as in:

"Yeah mate that was fucking sound night last night"
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:09, archived)

innit
(stop looking at my goats you bag of spunk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:11, archived)

Safe, sorted, large, carpet, wicked

( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:20, archived)

this
i could call myself any combination of the following words, but really they amount to the same thing:
studio/recording/sound engineer/technician

i can also technically call myself an acoustics engineer, but that is a slightly different thing - my interest in which isn't what it used to be.
( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:09, archived)

Beware of sounding like a ponce.
If you mean 'sound', say 'sound', not 'acoustic' or 'audio' or whatever. People appreciate plain English.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:14, archived)

i'm not using ponce language for the sake of it
the title of the degree i hold is Acoustic Engineering.

however, i am currently employed as a sound engineer.
( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:20, archived)

Hmm. Wasn't suggesting that was the tone you were going for!
I guess you should describe yourself as whatever you do at the moment.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:31, archived)

OK doug
It's not too informal - but you still lost me by the end of the first paragraph. Admittedly I don't recruit in your sector - but you're not really selling yourself enough there. Oh and of course you're wanting to move on to bigger and better things!
(lemonymillenniumbaboon, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:56, archived)

noted
come to think of it, i no longer like that phrase.
( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:02, archived)

where I have been the main engineer fornearly two years
( grindforcolumbine Terrorism is bloody rude., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:57, archived)

I am
363 days older than you

aicmfp
( diffy maybs, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:57, archived)

you need a unique selling point
what makes you different?

It doesn't matter if its not earth shattering but you must have one
(negative armadillo There never was much hope..just a fool's hope., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:58, archived)

His cock looks like a tiny banana?

( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:01, archived)

Swap the
If at any time there are any engineer vacancies at your studio...
paragraph with the
I am currently working on a freelance basis at...
paragraph
(Naughty Tortoise, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:58, archived)

Sellotape a used condom to the letter.
And don't bother tying a knot in the end of it.

That'll get you noticed.

Especially if it has brown smears on it.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:59, archived)

sing it to them, in the key of G,
and stun them with kazoo solos
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:00, archived)

and accordian.
you can never have too much accordian
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:04, archived)

You've held a job for 18 months from May 2005?
What year are you living in?

Do they still have cars in the future?

p.s. your birthday is the day after mine. Different decade, though.
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:01, archived)

no.
as of may this year, i've had my job for 18 months.

hmm... maybe that does sound ambiguous. i'll change it.
( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:04, archived)

unfortunately speculative letters are likely to get binned
(my wife works in evil HR) - but it's worth a shot when leads are hard to find otherwise.

Make contacts in your trade, and keep your ear to the ground. Read the trade papers or BBS or whatever there is.
Personal contacts are so much more useful in an industry like this. Do a freebie for someone if they're short-handed or swap tips on using some of the kit or software.
At least then you might hear of vacancies coming up at other studios, and if your face is already known, you'll stand a far better chance of getting an interview...

...and keep your CV up to date - you never know when a chance might come. Good luck.
(dognutz, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:03, archived)

yes i realise this
I have made some good contacts through my current work, but I have to keep trying on all fronts.
( sex and dougs and rock n roll, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:06, archived)

why oh why
are richard and judy so popular?
he's such an arse, and she's like a bumbling wrinkly toad
grr, i don't know why they wind me up so much, but they do. ok, breathe
( bookerina, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

And the abc1 schedule is fucked up
Old Scrubs should be on, but it isn't
( Rev. A-MOL is lurking around these parts again, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

Hahaha.
Bumbling wrinkly toad. Quality.

I liked it when i heard Sonya off Eastenders being described as having a slug head.
( grindforcolumbine Terrorism is bloody rude., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

'She looks like a bulldog licking piss of a thistle'
Is still my fave
(about Michelle Bass from last years Big Brother)
(Naughty Tortoise, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:52, archived)

A (very) similar one:
Colleen McLoughlin looks like a Bulldog licking piss off a nettle.

Much stingsting
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:07, archived)

everyone is waiting for the day Judy snaps, punches out Richard and takes a shit on the coffee table,
still a few minutes to go
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

how has richard not been caught shagging around yet?
he must do. he's actually quite handsome and she looks like a pre-surgery jabba the hut.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:50, archived)

yes he's known in some circles as
Dick Madly
(negative armadillo There never was much hope..just a fool's hope., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:53, archived)

you fancy him then ?
You want his big hairy man cock pounding your willing love peach endlessly ?

You want him to push your legs back over your shoulders so he can get in deeper ?

Dirty cunt.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:53, archived)

You write Richard and Judy fan-fic porn
AICMFP
FTYJQERBWETUIOIEWQEBH
(Naughty Tortoise, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:57, archived)

Fucking wogs.

( sprinkles ITS AN ISLAND, morron, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:44, archived)

We beleive you now
no need to constantly prove your username day in day out.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

Cunt.

( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

good
video that.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

Twat.

( grindforcolumbine Terrorism is bloody rude., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

Go take a trip on a bus,
mong-weasel.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:46, archived)

Mong weasels
give me the fucking horn.

Imagine it.

A vulnerable little weasel with a tiny balloon covered in dribble.....
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

where are my underpants?

( MrA, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:46, archived)

On Brian Blessed's
bedside table.

With bloodstains.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:48, archived)

I don't often do this
beacuse frankly you are not worth the energy but:

Fuck off, you ignornant, snot nosed, spoilt little brat. Nobody gives a toss about you or your thoughts on anything. Trying to be 'controversial' when you don't have two brain cells to rub together just shows you up for what you really are which is the very definition of the word cunt.

/end rant, click 'ignore'
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:50, archived)

This.
By the fucking shovel-full.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:52, archived)

That.
But a little more.
( grindforcolumbine Terrorism is bloody rude., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:52, archived)

This.
Although I would have added the adjective "spanging" before shovel-full
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:53, archived)

Just got back from the South Bank
area - there's an erie calm in parts of London at the moment.
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:40, archived)

The traffic cameras and that
make me think Cillian Murphy is about to lumber into shot.
( Rev. A-MOL is lurking around these parts again, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

I've just been walking about Kentish Town
and it's business as usual.

Although all the buses say "Not in service" which hasn't stopped people sitting at the bus stops.
( rob, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

Apart from one job I had at the Royal National Hotel (very near bus blast)
I got everything done today, far less traffic than normal.
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:43, archived)

Whilst muttering islamic prayers
and strapping 100lbs of C4 to their torsos?
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:44, archived)

Strapping
100lbs of Friends, Hollyoaks and Big Brother to their torsos?

Nut-job.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:48, archived)

arrghhh
get out of my head :)
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:50, archived)

100lbs
of channel 4, what like loads of tellies showing big brother ?
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

OMG!!!!!1! Has anyone told the housemates?

( Rev. A-MOL is lurking around these parts again, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:50, archived)

Yes
To both baldmonkey and you.

*sigh*
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:56, archived)

Friend in Vauxhall
has buses running there.

Maybe they're less concerned about south Londoners..
( Dekazer, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:46, archived)

Buses are only stopped
in Zone 1. I think Vauxhall is zone 2.

/busspotter.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

Camden's the same

( mrlogic is copying your beard, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:52, archived)

strikes me as odd
that we're so outraged about 33 people dying and london being effectively crippled by a couple fo bombs when this sort of thing happens regularly in other countries (where "we" are the bombers). We don't really care then, do we? Is that just because it's in a poor country where the people aren't really real?

Edit: don't read this post, or any of the replies, it's utter shite, not really sure what I was going on about to be honest - maybe I'm having a nervous breakdown. *goes for cigarette*
( mrlogic is copying your beard, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:37, archived)

You mean jokes and shit?
Check this board and the main. There have been enough jokes and stuff throughout the day.
( Rev. A-MOL is lurking around these parts again, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:39, archived)

no no, jokes are fine
it's just the reaction by the western world

BBC don't put on a special every time a suicide bomber blows up some people in iraq

i think that's my point, not really sure what i'm talking about, but i feel a bit unbalanced. maybe i'm still a bit shook up
( mrlogic is copying your beard, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:46, archived)

The same reason that
your local paper doenst headline stories that happen in fucking Paris.

Local news for local people.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:51, archived)

yeah yeah yeah
read my edit
( mrlogic is copying your beard, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:53, archived)

Yep

( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:39, archived)

No we care more when it's London
becuase it's nearly us.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:40, archived)

erm...
it's close to home...? so naturally we're going to be more affected... I would have thought the answer to your question was obvious. Nobody likes to see civillians blown up - oh except for terrorists
(lemonymillenniumbaboon, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:40, archived)

And Bush.
AICMFP
( grindforcolumbine Terrorism is bloody rude., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:43, archived)

this is actually
a good point
you're Michael Moore AICMFP - back!
(lemonymillenniumbaboon, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:44, archived)

that's what I mean
when a suicide bomber in iraq blows up a bus full of kids, we go, oh dear that's a shame, but here, 33 grown ups khark it and we're shitting ourselves. I don't really knwo what my point is, but it just seems wrong somehow. Of course, when Princess Di died, the whole fucking country cried (except b3ta, of course, my saviour) which seems like too much compared to this.

/struggling for equality in outpourings of greif
( mrlogic is copying your beard, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:43, archived)

i understand what you're saying
but it's all about proximity - we're being made aware of our own mortality. Let's face it 1 million people starve to death in Etheopia (sp?) and we don't flinch, if an old lady starved to death in the house next door, we'd all be completely freaked. it's OK, it's a normal coping mechanism.
/edit - www.b3ta.com/talk/624872 - put it a lot better!
(lemonymillenniumbaboon, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

you're all right
i still think it's weird though
( mrlogic is copying your beard, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:48, archived)

b3ta didn't exist when Diana died
although I personally remember working out how to play God Save The Queen on a spanish guitar as a tribute.
( rob, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

How many of those clocks did you sell in the end?
If there had been a b3ta, the board would have been a sight worth seeing that day, I'm sure...
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:50, archived)

sounds like a potential contest idea...

( Staticgirl, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:13, archived)

it's easy, don't grieve for anyone,
grieving is for the families and people who actually knew them.
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

that's like saying that you should be as sad when a stranger's mum dies as when your mum dies.
it's proximity and the threat to yourself.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

Poor people
aren't worth much, so fuck them.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

you can fuck poor people ?
*Rushes off to Wales*
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:42, archived)

Your so right.
We are all evil.
You dumb fuck.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

no need for that
i'm not saying we're evil, i'm saying that it just seems unbalanced
( mrlogic is copying your beard, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

I'll unbalance you in a minute, sunshine.
Now get to your fucking room, without any fucking dinner you fucking clit-twutting fuck.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:04, archived)

Hahahaha!
Once again, the hairless simian saves the day.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

Would you care more if your mum died, or if your great aunty died?

(Naughty Tortoise, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

Depends

they might care more about Great Aunt coz Mum was a drunk who kicked the shit outta him and sold all his toys for more booze, Great Aunt could have stepped in and saved him therefore he'd care more about Great Aunt

*only saying this as I don't have a mum or great aunt, but would shout from the rooftops if her 'birth' mother died*
( diffy maybs, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:55, archived)

So what...
You think that people in Afganistan are going to be mourning about this attack?

Of course people are more concerned about local issues. Thats why we have local news.
(R-T-C Got arbitrage profits?, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/624915
( mrlogic is copying your beard, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:53, archived)

Monkeys
It's all explained perfectly by the Monkey Sphere...

Clickety click
(MSB Load universe into cannon. Aim at brain. Fire., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 17:08, archived)

My baby is kicking

I shall miss the kicks when it's born

and the fact that it's quiet
( diffy maybs, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:35, archived)

If you want to employ
me to kick you in the stomach after it's born 'd gladly do it...

*laces up DMs*
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:37, archived)

but you would have to be
inside me...
( diffy maybs, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:39, archived)

I think
he'd like to be inside anybody.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:40, archived)

*bums*


/predictable
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:42, archived)

The deal is getting better and better...
You'd best get stretching so I can get up there...
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

hehehe

i cant bearly move hun, let alone stretch.

what will my husband say though, he hasn't been inside me since March...must be cobwebs by now
( diffy maybs, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:44, archived)

Well that's OK
when you give birth I'm sure you'll rip your kipper anyway so that should help things.

Poor bloke - must have an arm like popeye at them moment.
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:46, archived)

yeah bless him
I've had to adjust all his t shirts to allow for the rippling muscle

his mum doesnt know if she should be proud or not

edit/ what an awful sentence

"I'm sure you'll rip your kipper anyway"
( diffy maybs, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:48, archived)

_
kick it back!!!
(dernuke - ARTCRAP, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:37, archived)

They get replaced by screams for a bit
and then in a few months, they start kicking you again.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:37, archived)

I've always thought they do this to abort themselves

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:38, archived)

yay

( rob, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:40, archived)

It'll kick you plenty enough once it's escaped

and headbutt you, bite you and batter you on the bridge of the nose with the telly remote control *still hurts two days later*
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

My

Chi never did that, to me...

Hubby gave his Nan a black eye when he was a few months old

She's an old witch so I have always loved hearing this story
( diffy maybs, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

everyone wins - except us
the extremists need the politicos for their cause and the politicos need the extremists to justify their police state

if Al Qu'da didn't exitst they would need to invent it

mmm

now theres a thought
(Betty Bo Bibster, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:33, archived)

You are casting pearls among swine
Or talking bollocks to those who dont give a fuck.

One or the other.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:34, archived)

What can I do
for the 30 minutes I have to stay at work (to look decent)? Other than work, obviously.

I'm bored bored bored. Cheers bitches :D
( Dekazer, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:35, archived)

Rhymes with Bank
and ends in "ooooooohhhhhhhh"
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:36, archived)

Tits, webcam,
the solution is staring us in the face. Or rather, will be.

Edit: or www.funnygames.nl/spelletjes/803.html
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:37, archived)

Why would I want
to look at someone's tits on a webcam?
( Dekazer, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

*looks outside, sees no police*
*talks freely on this board*
( MrA, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:35, archived)

vere are your paperz, comrade?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:36, archived)

For you, Tommy, ze var iz over

( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:38, archived)

*bribes*

( MrA, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:42, archived)

*speaks in German accent*


*passes freely*
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:46, archived)

Al Qaeda
is a term created by the US allowing them to prosecute members by racketeering laws. It's a cover-all term for Islamic Extremists.
( Rev. A-MOL is lurking around these parts again, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:35, archived)

pretty true
its like the Russian mafiya. Not a single entity with a defined structure, more loose association between similar groups.
( MrA, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:38, archived)

yes, a thought,

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:35, archived)

Al-Qaeda didn't, and they did.
Unfortunately, the BBC scooped you by a year or so.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:36, archived)

Power of Nightmares
I wished I'd taped that. Could do with rewatching.
( Rev. A-MOL is lurking around these parts again, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:38, archived)

It was ver good
and I am also kicking myself for not having taped it.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:40, archived)

Class
You can get it over Bittorrent.
(MSB Load universe into cannon. Aim at brain. Fire., Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:56, archived)

A bloke walks into a pub singing and playing a lute
the landlord says "You're BARD !"
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:39, archived)

Woodworm walks into a pub
and asks "Where's the bar tender?"
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:40, archived)

What if it was a laminated plastic bar ?
He'd be fucked then wouldnt he ?

Fucking larval cunt.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:42, archived)

Arg...
I just got a tip off that there was an incident involving two trains about 500 yds. from my house, and there were large numbers of police, fire and ambulance in attendence.

So I grab and prep my DV camera, and leg it down to the site, only to find that all that has happened is a train struck a cow.

Now I'm bloody knackered.
(R-T-C Got arbitrage profits?, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:32, archived)

FREE STEAKS AND MILK!

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:34, archived)

Stop being anti jewish

( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:39, archived)

this

( hazzamon I've nothing better to do, Thu 7 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)