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This is life
touch my bum
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:28, archived)
*Gropes*

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:28, archived)
I love you more than a leper loves doughnuts

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:32, archived)
I just turned on b3ta and an arse is offered my way.
It's like Christmas.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:32, archived)
Lets fuck.

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:34, archived)
My penis isn't going to reach that far so I'll have to be your bitch.
I hope that's all right.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:37, archived)
Oh Neptune you're so fine
you're so fine you blow my mind

HEY NEPTUNE
*clap clap clap clap*
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:41, archived)
You can get fucked after that performance down there.
Whore.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:42, archived)
BITTER.

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:43, archived)
I thought we had something special before I found out he was putting out all over the place.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:44, archived)
just remember the good times

(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:45, archived)
THE GOOD TIMES WERE ALL A LIE.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:45, archived)
there, there
*hands neptune a clean tissue to dry eyes*
(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:46, archived)
I thought he loved me.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:45, archived)
I TOLD YOU FROM THE START I WASNT A ONE MAN WOMAN MAN

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:44, archived)
I want a do right all night man.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:46, archived)
If its any consolation
if I were gay and knew what you looked like I would totally make you my one and only.
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:48, archived)
You probably wouldn't if you knew what I looked like.
Great personality though. Possibly.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:50, archived)
see, it's not all bad then is it

(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:51, archived)
Giggedy Giggedy

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:42, archived)
My mate chucked a kebab at one of the cheeky girls. Not sure which one.
Large donner with extra chili sauce since you ask.
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)
Lets fuck.

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:37, archived)
Oi.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)
I knew that would get you going.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:43, archived)
When I was 14 I shouted
'fuck off, you have no friends'

to The Cartoons of Ooh Ee Ooh Ah Ah Ting Tang Walla Walla Bing Bang Fame
(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:42, archived)
I'm home from my holidays.
Rejoice.
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)
Maffy Waffy!
Hi babe, show us yer pants
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:36, archived)
Also, lets fuck.

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:37, archived)
Also, oi.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)
Erm... Let me put on a clean pair 1st.

(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:50, archived)
im listening to hands to heaven by breathe
kill me now
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)
I'll get the mallett......

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:35, archived)
I love that response!
Lets fuck.
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)
I fucking hate you, you cunt.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)
maan you are OUT

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:39, archived)
now now children
play nicely
(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:39, archived)
He's a fucking filthy slag who doesn't deserve anything nice.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:41, archived)
even filthy slags need friends though

(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:42, archived)
Well, hello

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:50, archived)
we're back to the hello's again

(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:52, archived)
Show us yer pants
hope that helps

love you,
Broadsword x
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:54, archived)
such a charmer!
how can I resist
(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:56, archived)
You're the woman.

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:41, archived)
While I appreciate a new thread after an hour and a half of that last crap...
I would rather not. Sorry, no ofence.
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)
Lets fuck.

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)
Yeah, I hope you get AIDS and die.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)
Aww, wuv wuu too :)

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:42, archived)
Never on a first date.
/not a slaaaag.
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:41, archived)
Broaders is enough slag for you both...

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 15:51, archived)
Hello! Old person posting.
I was going to start my thread spamming our bash on August 15th but I understand that upsets some folk so I'll not do that.
click here to see a serious debate on this issue.
So then, my question is...
What question should I start a new thread with?
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:02, archived)
I dunno, but the answer is that I'm settling down with a cup of tea and a sossy sandwich.
So I've won the thread.

LOL, FOOD.
(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:05, archived)
I'd TOTALLY like a nibble on your sossy sandwich.

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:06, archived)
SUP MY TEA YOU SLAG.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:06, archived)
I WANT YOU IN ME.
AND BY IN ME I MEAN I WANT YOU TO MAKE ME BREAKFAST.
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:08, archived)
and by breakfast he means pregnant

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:10, archived)
God damn, I wanna be impregnated by Noit HARD

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:14, archived)
*sends you a spunky rag and a turkey baster*

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:20, archived)
I love it when you talk sexy and that

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:21, archived)
I'm totally recording a hard rock version of a Frank Sinatra song
RIGHT NOW

I'm bored of it though, inspiration is not with me today

I might do something else involving going outside for a bit
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:05, archived)
Are you coming to the Dublin Bash?

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:05, archived)
STOP INVITING PEOPLE
I get scared.
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:06, archived)
It's okay, I'll protect you.

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:07, archived)
*feels warm inside*

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:09, archived)
Oh dear.
Have you pissed yourself again?
(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:47, archived)
I think I'll go to that
haha, will I bollocks
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:09, archived)
im going too
where you flying from?
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:10, archived)
Rochdale International Airport

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:11, archived)
You're not invited anyway, you old cunt.

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:13, archived)
I'm bored today, I want to go down town but I'd end up spunking all my money away on crap I don't need
I think I'll go to the pie shop instead and spend the afternoon overdosing on lard and meat
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:16, archived)
Good stuff.
Get booze and sweets.
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:31, archived)
Frank's shopping list:
booze
fags
pies
sweets
more booze

my life is just a non-stop party
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:37, archived)
I need to look into that.
Travel and such. It's been years since I went to Dublin.
(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:10, archived)
Spamming bashes is wrong.

(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:10, archived)
Your question should be: Why am I such a cunt?
It's official
(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:06, archived)
Hahaah
Did you make that?
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:07, archived)
No I didn't
The old attention seeker made it himself. I still have no skillz in that department.
(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:09, archived)
Pfft

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:13, archived)
She nicked it out of my profile
where the rest of my tasteful art is housed.
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:10, archived)
Haha, what the fuck?

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:07, archived)
OMG Tha test is rong!!1!
(at the end of the day)
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:07, archived)
Prooves.

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:09, archived)
In one of those frames, Jermy Kyle looks a lot like Sexface.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:42, archived)
Friz Birthday subthread

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:08, archived)
Friz Death Threat sub-subthread

(Nalr I'll get the coals, you bring the burgers., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:09, archived)
Careful now
Probably
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:12, archived)
Hey, nothing stopping me from making a placeholder...
You can't stop me!

/trafalgar square plinth
(Nalr I'll get the coals, you bring the burgers., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:15, archived)
Is it your birthday?
I'd totally say happy birthday right now, y'know, if I liked you.
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:10, archived)
well done with that whole successfully being born once thing

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:14, archived)
Although I think there must have been
a bit of a squeeze-on when the head came out, hence the fat face.
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:17, archived)
A twat-tearing mug only a mother could love.

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:20, archived)
maybe his mum farted as he came out
that can cause terrible birth defects
(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:21, archived)
haha or something, probably

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:25, archived)
i lol'd and done wees

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:26, archived)
*passes tena lady pad to rosalicious*

(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:27, archived)
Hello newish person

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:30, archived)
hello broadsword
how can I assist you?
(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:31, archived)
I was just saying 'hello' y'know, to be polite and that
though it appears you are a lady which I didn't previously realize.

Fancy a shag?
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:33, archived)
crested or spotted shag?

(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:36, archived)
Sadly my answer to this has been censored

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:44, archived)
probably for the best

(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:49, archived)
Feel special Neddy...
I never had any of this when I came back :(

They poured scorn upon me, not love :(
(Nalr I'll get the coals, you bring the burgers., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:44, archived)
I feel so special
like a teenager being groomed on the internet by a 50 year old trucker called Dave
(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:47, archived)
Hello newish person

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:48, archived)
Oi
Join the queue!
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:36, archived)
Never mind that, I'm off to the Pearse Museum, then having a big steak dinner cooked for me, then I'm going to the pub.
How are you people celebrating my birthday?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:26, archived)
I've been sellotaping fireworks to budgerigars

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:27, archived)
You'd be doing that anyway.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:27, archived)
I've celebrated with a haircut
and soon I'm off into town to go birthday present shopping (not for you though, sorry abut that)
(I helped save b3ta! minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:28, archived)
Is this your boyfriend's birthday, then?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:28, archived)
it's on monday
We'll be celebrating in Dublin
(I helped save b3ta! minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:29, archived)
It's not actually my birthday til next weekend, but I'll be away then.
The purpose of today's celebrations is to give the people of Leinster a chance to show their respects.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:30, archived)
they really do need a proper outlet for such respect
it must be frustrating only being able to show it once a year
(I helped save b3ta! minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:31, archived)
The Leinster rugby team are doing an appearance in the shops opposite my local today.
It's good to see them taking part in the festivities.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:33, archived)
I got a new jumper.

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:28, archived)
What's wrong with shirts, then?
Why do you hate shirts?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:29, archived)
shirts are male blouses.

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:44, archived)
I'm drinking a bottle of 1.79 euros wine. Want a glass?
Happy birthday!
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:30, archived)
i can only assume that it is actually vinegar

(I helped save b3ta! minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:31, archived)
It's really not that bad, I'm pleasantly shocked

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:34, archived)
Lidl just keeps getting cheaper.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:31, archived)
Pfft, there is a Lidl 5 mins from here
I only bought the stuff as a test, wasn't expecting much but it's certainly drinkable. I haven't dared try the 1 euro stuff yet.
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:35, archived)
Where are you?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:36, archived)
I don't like to say again in case I turn into Limey Treat

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:40, archived)
You're in cr3's bedroom?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:43, archived)
Is there some b3tagossip I'm unaware of?
a threesome with cr3, spangolin & limey treat you say?

blimey
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:44, archived)
There is now.
Apparently they had eight arms like Vishnu.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:46, archived)
I'm so fucking aroused right now.

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:49, archived)
hit your bellend with the wine bottle
that'll sort you right out
(I helped save b3ta! minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:52, archived)
Now I'm even more aroused.

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:54, archived)
put your bellend in the wine bottle
that'll definitely sort it out
(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:54, archived)
Silly Neddy, broadsword cock is not cork

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:59, archived)
screwtop?

(I helped save b3ta! Neddy shucking chit funt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:00, archived)
You saucy minx

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:04, archived)
oh man for a couple of euros more you get a nice one :P

(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:43, archived)
IT'S NOT YOUR BIRTHDAY IT'S MY BIRTHDAY YOU FUCK

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:33, archived)
I know. My birthday is next week.
It's all explained up there.

*points to the subthread*
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:34, archived)
I don't got no time for no subthreads, bitch

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:35, archived)
Did father christmas bring you any nice toys?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:35, archived)
Your parents and his parents fucked at probably around the same time.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:38, archived)
OH, GONZ

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:39, archived)
Nonsense. Friz is a mere child.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:42, archived)
I'm primal screaming your name from the roof of a speeding automobile
with a pig's head in one hand and a burning copy of the bible in the other.

Sorry about not making much effort ... I'm a bit tired.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:34, archived)
King James or Good News?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:34, archived)
The original of the Codex Sinaiticus

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:36, archived)
King James or Good News Codex Sinaiticus?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:44, archived)
i wore a raspberry beret
the kind you find in a second hand store
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:41, archived)
Raspberry Beret was Prince's best song.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:49, archived)
i dance in the car like a mong when its on

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:50, archived)
i've hired a skywriter to write "FUCK YOU GRANDAD" over your house

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:42, archived)
*readies Barret 50mm*

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:43, archived)
i lifted up my foot for 5 seconds.
the left one.
(I helped save b3ta! scott,, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:57, archived)
sandal or espadrille?

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:58, archived)
flipper

(I helped save b3ta! scott,, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:00, archived)
I'm sure i speak for us all when i say
PHWOAR
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:06, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/6291690
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:59, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/2687060
(I helped save b3ta! scott,, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:04, archived)
Aww, there are a couple of people in that thread that I quite miss

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:05, archived)
I walked up to the village and got fucking soaked, to collect the car.
I had many drinks last night in your honour. They sell Churchward's cider for three euro a bottle in the Den. Good times.
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:58, archived)
I blame cider for my downfall last night :(

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:03, archived)
Haha, poor Broady.

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:05, archived)
Yay sympathy :)

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 14:08, archived)
Hello, miseries
I'm in a Wetherspoons in Chester, prior to the races. I'm wearing CUFFLINKS and everything. I'm now finishing the 2nd beer and on the hunt for steak. How are you lot? I do hope all is well and that Friz didn't die. Also, food etc.
(I helped save b3ta! Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:50, archived)
oh god,
The chester mutton dressed as lamb day.
(I helped save b3ta! MrA, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:52, archived)
Be fair.
It's not quite like the Aintree ladies day.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:06, archived)
Always bet on black.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:52, archived)
I thought it was the greys that always win?

(I helped save b3ta! TY&GN, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:53, archived)
I'm wonderful thankyou

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:52, archived)
My new hammer drill cuts through concrete like butter
POWER TOOLS! You lot should be ashamed.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:55, archived)
For 3 years now I have asked for a really good cordless drill for Christmas and no-one is taking me seriously
How am I meant to make things?
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Sp@m, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:06, archived)
You're a woman
stay away from that stuff. It's better in the long run.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:09, archived)
We got a really good one from B&Q for £30
It's served us well. Lots of drilling.
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:10, archived)
I asked for and got one of those when I left my last job.
They also got me a bench to go with it. I was really pleased they listened to me. I had the obligatory bunch of flowers too though.
(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:11, archived)
I hope you drilled them

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:15, archived)
No, I dumped the flowers.
I hadn't asked for them.
(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:30, archived)
I gave away an electric plane the other day
I made some doors and sliced my knuckle off. Good times
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:10, archived)
Eugh
Owie :(
(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:25, archived)
I sliced lines into my fingers with a grinder when I was trying to re-lay a floor quickly.
I was moving house and didn't notice till the day before when I moved a sofa that one of the kids had spilt a drink underneath it and it had lifted the wooden floor. I was desperately trying to cut the wood down to size and stick it back down and move out at the same time. I didn't notice till later what a mess I'd made of my fingers.
(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:28, archived)
I have an electric can opener, does this count?

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:25, archived)
Only if you're capable of injuring yourself with it

(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:29, archived)
Well, if you stick your finger in it...

(Nalr I'll get the coals, you bring the burgers., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:32, archived)
there are definitely no baked beans inside my elbows

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:34, archived)
i just ate an egg butty
with ketchup. it was fucking nomilicious.

time for the beach in the next hour or so methinks
(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:00, archived)
I've got the hangover from hell
plus points: I'm alive
negative points: I genuinely have no idea what I got up to last night
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:04, archived)
I am expecting to be exactly like this tomorrow
Except I am going out with the people whom I volunteer for, and I am vice chair or their board of directors this could all end very badley.
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Sp@m, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:07, archived)
Same here.
My friend is have the Irish leg of her wedding tonight. I expect to be fuckered.
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:13, archived)
I've got a nasty feeling my bruising is from trying to break into my apartment complex last night
what I'm unsure of is why I was trying to break in, my keys are right in front of me
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:14, archived)
oh god.
first bedlol for the night here in Aus!
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:21, archived)
I like to give young ladies bedlols

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:22, archived)
etc.

(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Sp@m, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:05, archived)
Very good thanks, after a mini-bash last night.
Now I have bacon, egg, sausages etc etc so I am just about ready to face the day.
(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:09, archived)
Cool, who was at the mini bash?

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:12, archived)
It was basically everybody on earth apart from you.
You spoil everything.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:18, archived)
I heard that Esme Wesme caused cancer by stirring her potatoes the wrong way
could just be a rumour of course
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:20, archived)
She whispered nasty things to Osama Bin Laden when he was at school and caused all Islamist terrorism.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:22, archived)
I heard she caused AIDS just by surreptitiously breaking wind in a school assembly

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:23, archived)
She was the snake in the garden of eden.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:24, archived)
Now I'm aroused damnit.

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:25, archived)
:(((

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:23, archived)
Oh, great, I'm at work.
BORED.
(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:21, archived)
And isn't Chester a nice place.

(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:34, archived)
lol
suks 2 b u
lol
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:36, archived)
I NO!

(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:39, archived)
*bums*

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
Still hungover
And alone. The others are being lazy and aren't up yet.
(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:23, archived)
*bums*

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:33, archived)
Ooh

(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
haha, look at your fucking face and your pube beard and your fucking hair you fat spastic hahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:48, archived)
Hello gilgy wilgy plopsy poo

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:49, archived)
hello gorgeous
I might have some food in a minute!
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:51, archived)
OMG OMG OMG
Keep us informed on what you eat!
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:52, archived)
i cant wait!

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:53, archived)
alright rosalicious

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:54, archived)
alright broadsword

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:56, archived)
I'm totally sitting around in my pants contemplating wine for breakfast right now

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:57, archived)
same here but for lunch
shall we?
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)
I will if you will

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:01, archived)
yes lets!

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:01, archived)
Cheers!

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 13:06, archived)
Hello Fatties.
Internet hero JMG has just got home from another success outdoors.
Please make something up or moan at top speed whilst I go brush my teeth.
I have perfect teeth.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:16, archived)
I fucking hate you and your perfect fucking teeth.
My teeth have given me nothing but fucking grief and pain for the last 4 years. I just had my wisdom teeth out. All four of them. my face is all puffy and chipmunk like. You cunt. Why aren't my teeth perfect too?

Glad to hear you had a good day though :P
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:18, archived)
Sometimes the dentists says "You really DO have smashing teeth, there".
He's right, you know..
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:24, archived)
There was nothing wrong with them health wise
I just had an overbite and teeth that wouldn't come through. :( They're lovely and white and even.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:28, archived)
Hello JMG,
Bluestar, Foldsfive, Druid and Malchick are here.

BS and FF are going to Brighton soon.
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:18, archived)
Have you rigged the room with explosives?

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:25, archived)
Is this your way of telling us you've just been to Asda and now have some toothpaste?
Which brand?
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:18, archived)
Baldgate.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:25, archived)
I'm going to start buying Colgate now.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:26, archived)
I'm going to get my haircut
by a flamboyant man who wears Prada. GOSH he's good.
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:20, archived)
You be careful there.
There's a great puffter & Handsome Gav story we really should share over BEER some time.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:26, archived)
He's jolly smashing and well worth the money.
Beer, I miss beer. I should order some more boozeless beer online.
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:35, archived)
You flimsy handed love sponge.
Get some REAL beer. With BEER in.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:36, archived)
Flimsy!?
How dare you!
I'm sitting here in a multicolored teeshirt with a Dead Sea mud facemask on.
I'm the pinnacle of modern masculinity.
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:45, archived)
Hello JMG. I am in my office
doing my time sheets in order to get paid for last weeks work. Mrs HB is in the kitchen making food and doing the women's work.
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:22, archived)
I applaud this.
I applaud this fully.
Well played, the Team HB.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:26, archived)
JMG, I am very hungover
:(
(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:22, archived)
Chin up. Water in.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:26, archived)
I don't have any moans JMG.
Watching saturday kitchen and thinking about the leftover tandoori chicken in the fridge that will make a nice sandwich. yum yum.

How are you?
(I helped save b3ta! rosie posie tingly bongly, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:24, archived)
Splendid indeed.
I, being incredibly famous on the internet. Was smuggled in to a hotel last night.
I've totally slept and not paid a dime.

Another victory on the road.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:27, archived)
I am trying to watch a film
but the couple next door are throwing things at each other

I'd like to open a "projectile marriage counselling centre" where enraged couples throw stuff at each other in a safe environment
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:27, archived)
Like soft play but for fat wives.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:28, archived)
WHERES MY BIRTHDAY MESSAGE, JMG

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:33, archived)
I WISH TO VALIDATE THIS DAY'S EXISTANCE. POSSIBLY GOING AS FAR AS PUNCHING THE FAT GENTLEMAN SAT NEXT TO ME, IN THE ARM.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:35, archived)
AND MANY MOOOOOOORE

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:36, archived)
I've now hit him three times.
I'm making up for missed Friz birthdays of yesteryear.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:37, archived)
Can I give you one instead?

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:36, archived)
No offence, but who the fuck are you?

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:37, archived)
Are you old enough for Alzheimer's yet?

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:39, archived)
I was considering attending the Chap Olympiad this afternoon.
but £15 for a ticket? they can cock off.
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:34, archived)
Break in.
Top hat, tails, win the 100m RARR.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:36, archived)
I need to phone my boss to say all the stuff has gone down the shitter

I might wear a cape to help steel myself
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:35, archived)
Any trouble. Add me as a reference to your C.V.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:37, archived)
I should be doing work that im not getting paid for
but instead i am procrastinating by delurking for the first time in ages.
(zombiejosh wrow, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:38, archived)
I'm preparing fresh vegetables that I just harvested from the garden.
Primarily to upset the deep-fried fatberdeens.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:41, archived)
I'm making a scene on their behalf.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:55, archived)
my teeth are fucking fantastic
my weekend has gone to shit. anyone fancy the zoo with me?
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:43, archived)
Can't...
but have made Gonz promise to sort out a dinner date for you, me and him sometime.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:44, archived)
i do not bash :(

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:44, archived)
I know. He told me.
If you don't come, we can eat your food.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:45, archived)
sounds like a recipe for disaster
you giant Rhino.
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:46, archived)
We've already had Sickrik's effort.
What's the shittest joke you know?

There's these two biscuits walking down the road and the first one says to the other one 'where do you live then?' and the second one says 'fuck off, I'm not telling you that, you'll be round stealing my washing'.
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:08, archived)
What's white and wriggles accross a dancefloor?
Come Dancing
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:10, archived)
A little paper bag goes to the Doctor, claiming of feeling unwell.
After several weeks of tests, the Doctor tells him that he has AIDS.
"I can't have AIDS", says the little paper bag. "I'm not gay, not had a blood transfusion, not had unprotected sex, not shared needles or anything like that"!
"There's only one explanation then..." says the Doctor.
"...Your Mother must have been a carrier".
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:11, archived)
*high five*

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:11, archived)
Bill and Ben in a bath
Bill said "Flobabobadob"
Ben said "If you loved me, you'd swallow"
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:11, archived)
What is red and invisible?
No raspberrys.
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:14, archived)
I don't get this joke:
How do stop 4 white men from raping a white woman?

Throw them a golf ball.
(I helped save b3ta! SickRik float like a camembert sting like a brie, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:48, archived)
white men like playing golf
like you could throw a basketball to a group of black men and they'd run after it


you orange thicko
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:49, archived)
Wow, that's a shit joke.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:50, archived)
neither does the rest of sickepedia.
-2
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:50, archived)
*adds to best ever jokes list*

(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:51, archived)
The golf ball represents guilt
It's a metaphor I think
(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:51, archived)
and shout "FORE"

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:53, archived)
+ SKIN

(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:57, archived)
i like that joke

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:53, archived)
There was nothing funny about that joke.
At all.
Sorry! not trying to be mean or nothin'. Just saying.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:58, archived)
+no offence good times forum etc

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:09, archived)
yup that too

(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 11:16, archived)

"Hello Class 3C, I'm your new science teacher. My name is Mr Harvey, and today you're going to learn some fucking respect."
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:59, archived)
I hate jenpots.
I love her vagina.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:05, archived)
even with sexface muck up it?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:06, archived)
I hate sexface.
I hope he dies soon.

edit: Happy Birthday Friz xxx
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:00, archived)
What got you out of bed on the wrong side, grumpychops?
edit: some fuckwitted brass band have just started playing "Abide With Me" outside my window. Now I'm very annoyed.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:01, archived)
not out of bed yet
/lazy
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:02, archived)
I'm going to cook an artery-clanging fry-up
for some reason I woke up at 5 this morning, and now I need something to do.
Then I'll listen to the cricket.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:05, archived)
Hello you.
How's tricks?
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:02, archived)
excellent
and your fine self?
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:02, archived)
Can't complain.
Fed up of house hunting hassle but otherwise great.
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:03, archived)
Hello stranger
How's Aus???
(Eeh Blah Gum, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:05, archived)
has he raped you too?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:03, archived)
Any particular way you'd wish for him to go?

(Eeh Blah Gum, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:03, archived)
I'm having Cheese on Toast for breakfast
IT'S STILL MY BIRTHDAY
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:43, archived)
Put Branston on it
this will improve matters.

oh, and happy birthday
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:45, archived)
Then throw it in the bin and slap yourself for being a foodwrong.

(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:53, archived)
You went to Australia
contributions to food so far:
- Vegemite
- Peach Melba
- Kangaroo burgers

Questions?
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:54, archived)
And am teaching them how to cook.
A bit like the colonists of yesteryear, but with less chance I'll get sacrificed to some imaginary being.
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:57, archived)
I'll build you a wicker man if you like
it might take a while, I'm shit at basketwork.
I'm thinking of joining the Army, to meet interesting people and then shoot them.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:58, archived)
Dude, don't.
Last resort maybe, but you're smarter than that.
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:59, archived)
I thought so
but I fancy playing stupid for a while.
Might get me in shape, at least.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:00, archived)

in shape shot at
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:02, archived)
Bullets bounce off me
I'm far too beautiful to die.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:03, archived)
yay for calories

(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:45, archived)
KEEP POSTING SO WE KNOW YOU ARE STILL ALIVE

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:48, archived)
i bet hankster is dead

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:49, archived)
I bet he's shagging some bird off the telly

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:51, archived)
i was watching childrens telly this morning, i fell in love with some blonde chick, not the stumpy bird, she sickens me

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:52, archived)
Orville.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:52, archived)
happy birthday

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:48, archived)
happy birthday friz
and all that bizniz
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:51, archived)
How old are you
I know, lets count the onion rings to work it out. HAHAHA fat.
(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:53, archived)
*sniggers*

(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:53, archived)
I'm guessing about 30

(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:53, archived)
deffo mailing the modz bout dis

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:55, archived)
I have a stupid question.
Did you in the UK switch to Digital TV like us in the states? It is so friken retarded after YEARS of us changing analog for digital.
(Dog Biscuit Boy MY AMERICAN BARF IS TASTIER,THAN YOURS., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:28, archived)
Digital?
We're currently crowded around the wireless.
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:29, archived)
WAH I WAS BANNED FOR AN HOUR
THIS HURT ME SO I'M BLAMING YOU, FRIZ.
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:31, archived)
Dude, shut up

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:31, archived)
b3ta means a lot to mongychops. Don't make fun of him being upset

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:32, archived)
friz i never for one moment thought you had gone running to the mods, i always assumed it was one of the mods over reacting as usual to the forum posts on your behalf

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:33, archived)
Ah

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:34, archived)
So, you ARE okay?
I am worried.
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:35, archived)
don't you think it is a bit off to tell people that you 'are having a hard time of it'?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:35, archived)
This was weeks ago I said this to [a mod]
When I was having a bit of a breakdown. But that was 'cause I was looking for advice.

My life's improved a lot since.
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:37, archived)
i'd sue for a breach of confidence, personal details leaked online shocker
pages 2,3,4,5,6,7,8, 10 and 11, tits on 23
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:38, archived)
the only thing that annoyed me was that the mod in question expected us to know that you were having a hard time
how the fuck was that meant to happen? we had no idea
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:39, archived)
McDonalds was closed

(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:37, archived)
I fucking hate americans.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:29, archived)
awww to bad

poor baldmonkey
(Dog Biscuit Boy MY AMERICAN BARF IS TASTIER,THAN YOURS., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:30, archived)
To bad.

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:30, archived)
its reely to bad

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:32, archived)
American's r shit

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:33, archived)
POOR
FRITZY
(Dog Biscuit Boy MY AMERICAN BARF IS TASTIER,THAN YOURS., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:34, archived)
Who the fuck is Fritz
/ac
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:35, archived)
Eye hope thay WMD there ohn cuntry too smithereens.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:35, archived)
definately reely to bad
the looser
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:35, archived)
Yeh.
Theirs no escaping it.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:36, archived)
I wannna fuk u in the ass. BOTH YOU AD FRITZ

(Dog Biscuit Boy MY AMERICAN BARF IS TASTIER,THAN YOURS., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:38, archived)
Not yet
we're still operating on both, with the switch planned in the next two years. Seems likely to fuck up, though.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:31, archived)
Really?
you guys are planning to switch to digital like us?
(Dog Biscuit Boy MY AMERICAN BARF IS TASTIER,THAN YOURS., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:32, archived)
Where's my birthday message?

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:32, archived)
Much like a huge number of sensible decisions by our beloved government
this one is rubbish too.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:33, archived)
Apparently, there's places in the UK which have already switched to 100% digital.
Unfortunately, they're in the middle of fucking nowhere, and the local authority had to subsidise the boxes...
(Nalr I'll get the coals, you bring the burgers., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 10:07, archived)
hey you.
how's tricks?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:35, archived)
Hi VC
Not too bad, might have to move house soon. I'm going to console myself with a massive, artery-clogging fry-up.
You ok?
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:41, archived)
I've got neural augmentations drilling episodes of Torchwood continually into my brain
Kill me
(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:32, archived)
Use them to download porn instead
that would be much more fun.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:34, archived)
I can't, I paid £142.50 for these nanobots and all they want me to do is watch Torchwood and cooking shows

(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:38, archived)
Moohalaa won't let me have sex with him
So I'm going to blame JMG

/mongychops logic
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:25, archived)
This is a shit thread, Friz

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:26, archived)
Oh it's okay, I'll probably blame SexFace

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:26, archived)
Why so?

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:27, archived)
Because he has nothing to do with it

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:27, archived)
Oh, I see

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:27, archived)
I wish you were dead

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:28, archived)
You just made me laugh so hard some stitches tore.
and now my mouth is bleeding.
you cunt.
/giggles
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:29, archived)
BLAME SICKRIK
Or something
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:29, archived)
Happy birthday to Friz and other bon hommy.
but more to the point, the mods don't owe you anything. If they want to be self-serving power mad lunar ban-cans they can. b3ta isn't some state run service that you deserve fair and equal treatment on. It's a website run by a few people for their own pleasure. They can do what they like. Fuck off if you don't like it. etc.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:20, archived)
oh fuck off and have another breakdown you spastic,pehaps this time your brain will get a massive clot on it and you'll become funny

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:23, archived)
Will you really take me fishing?

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:25, archived)
yeah, alright

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:29, archived)
Good.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:30, archived)
Can I just say
I've no idea why people are pissed off at me. I only found out this morning why people are annoyed. And I need them to know I had nothing to do with it
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:24, archived)
Now what have I missed?

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:28, archived)
People were banned. People blamed me.
I'm like JMG.
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:30, archived)
no one blamed you friz

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:31, archived)
ARE YOU OK?

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:32, archived)
It's my birthday
Birthday thread please x
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:51, archived)
Fat chance.

(I helped save b3ta! lazygamer VS tittybiscuits, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:55, archived)
A scan of the popular page, and apparently I'm trying to kill myself

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:56, archived)
I'm not entirely sure what happened here
Did I make a YouTube of me offing myself?
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:58, archived)
First I've heard of it.
Then again, this is the first time I've been on here for days.
(I helped save b3ta! lazygamer VS tittybiscuits, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:00, archived)

hkudkgflhlhglg
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:27, archived)
Wormulus?

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:31, archived)
the very same

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:38, archived)
and
either someone stole his username OR more likely, he's saved it himself for a third non-triumphant de-flounce later this week

www.b3ta.com/~Wormulus
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:42, archived)
I got stepped for an hour for saying "I wish Friz was dead"
the mods think you're "having a hard time" and we're not allowed to say nasty things about you

mike got stepped for a lot longer, mongy too
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:59, archived)
Bloody hell
That's probably why I'm getting so much animosity from them.

It is original and hilarious
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:08, archived)
See, what they do is, anything post, they're overtly cautious
Thank you for telling me why though. They've been ignoring my gazzes.
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:09, archived)
so ... you're not having a hard time?
I'm very confused, I assumed you'd made an announcement here and I'd missed it
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:13, archived)
No. People have seemed to announced that for me

(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:32, archived)
I wish Gilgamesh burns his toast
and makes unappetizing scrambled eggs today
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:11, archived)
MODS! MODS! MODS! MODS!

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:14, archived)
I hope your cat shits on your kitchen floor
and you step in it in bare feet!


omg step me step me! *prances*
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:17, archived)
I AM HAVING A HARD TIME, YOU CAN'T SAY THAT NOW

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:18, archived)
wow spew the vitriol
can I join in?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:20, archived)
Its like i said yesterday
We seem to get modded one week on,one week off.
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:34, archived)
There's a line
and you just shagged its mum
(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:29, archived)
Hope you have a lovely day, Friz dearest.

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:02, archived)
you know I'm almost tempted to say "get fucked".
But it's your birthday so I won't be nasty. /massive hugs and luff.
Happy birthday.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:06, archived)
get fucked

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:14, archived)
that cartoon of yours made me giggle by the way.
you tosspot.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:17, archived)
I ran out of ideas for it very quickly
www2.b3ta.com/host/creative/10642/1211161108/Episode6.gif
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:20, archived)
bring out the honda accord!

(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:21, archived)
Happy fuck off moonface.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:28, archived)
Oh my god congratulations on the ability to be alive on a day where the earth is positioned round the sun roughly as it was when you were born
You're like some kind of amazing super hero. Still Alive Man is here to say don't do drugs kids. Unless they help you with creativity, then it's alright I suppose.
(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:30, archived)
YES
People are annoyed that it's my birthday!
(__, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:33, archived)
I want one now :(

(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:39, archived)
Happy Birthday lovely Friz ! :D

(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Sp@m, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:55, archived)
happy birthing canal day

(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 9:01, archived)
My god it's dead.
where the fuck is everybody?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:25, archived)
in all likelihood...
many are interfering with their neighbours' children or livestock
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:30, archived)
where in oz are ya again?
.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:31, archived)
Victoria.
Right near the beach, about as far south as you can go before being in the water. :P
why poppet?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:32, archived)
coz...
i was just showing some aussies around my city this week. they're from tasmania
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:33, archived)
Oh yeah? Tassie is kinda the butt of all jokes here.
Tassie is further south then I am, but I'm about as far south as you get before swimming to Tas!
Whereabout in Tasmania are they from?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:34, archived)
donno.
but they seemed nice. moving here for 14 months. (here being toronto, canada).
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:36, archived)
Nice.
I've always wanted to go to Canadadialand. I hear they have real proper thick snow up there in winter.
/has never seen snow.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:37, archived)
i'll send ya some...
it was a shit winter this year. far too much snow. two feet in one day, and when the wind blew it around, the drifts were four feet high.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:39, archived)
four feet high?
holy crap. that's like...shoulder height on me!
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:41, archived)
not usually...
toronto's not usually that snowy in wintertime. it's a pain in the ass to shovel.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:42, archived)
Tug, send some this way.
Norwich needs more snow...
(Nalr I'll get the coals, you bring the burgers., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 8:59, archived)
shush now, I'm stratocasting

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:38, archived)
fuck me...
you're up early...
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:40, archived)
he wants to get into your pants that's why.
:p
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:46, archived)
i'm shocked
what kind of cheap slut does he take me for?
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:47, archived)
how...
are you feeling, by the way? you were laid-up for a while, no?
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:48, archived)
I'm okay.
My back is almost better after tearing a muscle in it two weeks ago (finally have a near full range of movement!), and am just starting to get over my wisdom teeth being yanked out on Tuesday. These two weeks break have been crap! /laughs
And you - how are you?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:54, archived)
doing alright.
still at the office at the moment. wisdom teeth are lots of fun to get out, aren't they? i looked like a bloated chipmunk who'd been orally raped.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:55, archived)
aha yeah they're a scream.
I was looking very Sigrid Thornton-slash-chipmunk for a few days. Now I'm just back to chipmunk. It's very noticeable because my face is fairly angular normally, and I'm all puffy.

What're you doing in the office? sticking googly eyes to everything?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:57, archived)
heh, no.
that'd be fun. actually still working.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:58, archived)
working? as in actual work?
WTF man - you're on b3ta! Procrastinate! that's what it's for!
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:00, archived)
can do both, believe it or not...
waiting for a few stories to come in, then have to edit and slap into the paper.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:01, archived)
are you a journo then?

(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:02, archived)
bingo...
i work in the sports department.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:03, archived)
Nice.
I'd like to be a journo but at the same time I wouldn't. I love writing but not for deadlines. And so much of the news seems to be about pain and misery and suffering. If I'm going to write I want to write something happy!
Is it a major paper you work for?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:05, archived)
deadline writing...
is a skill that not everyone has. i've seen brilliant writers who churn out drivel when they're forced to work quickly.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:14, archived)
See I can do it, I can do it really really well,
I just hate it. Give me thirty minutes and a opinion topic or a topic with basic info and I can churn out about 800 words. I do this really well for exams in school - I just really dislike it - and don't see the point in writing like that when it takes all the pleasure out.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 7:19, archived)
I'm in a travelodge
not too bad really, but the location is fucking naff. Right next to the main road.

But I am near the GCHQ. yay
(I helped save b3ta! Jinxy13 is hating the S key, right about now., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 6:46, archived)
Name the book
"But let us come to Alexander, who was a man of such great goodness, that among the other praises which are accorded him is this, that in the fourteen years he held the empire no one was ever put to death by him unjudged; nevertheless, being considered effeminate and a man who allowed himself to be governed by his mother, he became despised, the army conspired against him, and murdered him."

/bored
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:22, archived)
The Prince? Somebody just blurted
that at me
(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:29, archived)
Gold Star to them then, but not you.
You get a dead arm. *punch*
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:30, archived)
If you Googled it, your armpits will be infested by the fleas of 1000 camels.

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:32, archived)
Nope, was blurted at me

(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:33, archived)
By the magical unicorn you keep trapped indoors?

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 4:00, archived)
the words blurt and prince
suggest a frog
(rigby happened on (and with added toothache), Sat 11 Jul 2009, 4:10, archived)
Being a Blurtee
is never a nice thing... :(
(I helped save b3ta! kitaro is all, like, "Nifty Biscuits" 'n that..., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 4:00, archived)
Roger Red Hat
by Sheila K. McCullagh
(I helped save b3ta! weaver., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:30, archived)
DAMMIT
:(
(I helped save b3ta! weaver., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:31, archived)
Haha, yes!
What mishaps will those pirates get into today?
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:31, archived)
hehe
did you ever read Six Dinner Sid?
(I helped save b3ta! weaver., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:38, archived)
No

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:46, archived)
The very hungry caterpillar.

(I helped save b3ta! Lord Gnome, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:38, archived)
That is the best book ever!
FACT.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:51, archived)
I disagree!

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 4:00, archived)
course you would
You is just arguing for the sake of arguing!
"I could be arguing in my spare time.."
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 11 Jul 2009, 4:16, archived)
tl;dr

(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:43, archived)
You so want me.

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:46, archived)
Is it obvious? :C

(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 4:40, archived)
know any other books where the author has described a song
then had it commissioned?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tq2vxmlXVTM
(rigby happened on (and with added toothache), Sat 11 Jul 2009, 4:09, archived)
You know what, right
I could do with cocking someone right now, any volunteers?
(I helped save b3ta! Kris Fucking Kristofferson, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:18, archived)
I need something to stir my drink

(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:19, archived)
My wife has got a clit like a fucking Saveloy
will that do?
(I helped save b3ta! Kris Fucking Kristofferson, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:21, archived)
She'll drink it up her vag and spit it in my face
I've fallen for that trick once too often. Not again, sunshine, not again...
(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:22, archived)
Foiled

(I helped save b3ta! Kris Fucking Kristofferson, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:25, archived)
I just shit, sorry.

(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:20, archived)
I'll cock your shit no problem
then walk away whistling whilst still remaining awesome
(I helped save b3ta! Kris Fucking Kristofferson, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:22, archived)
You sure know how to sweet talk, babe.

(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:27, archived)
Yes I do
and don't call me Shirley
(I helped save b3ta! Kris Fucking Kristofferson, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:29, archived)
Jenpots was looking for cock, earlier.
Are you free next saturday?
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:23, archived)
Why do you fuckers plan things
when I'm either broke, busy or both?

You cunts.
(I helped save b3ta! AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:25, archived)
What plan, I'm just trying to get people together, you missed my birthday.
You tool.
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:42, archived)
I'm rocking out that day.
We're playing an amusingly named festival. It's called "Cock Rock" HA! Rock. That like stones. And Stones is another name for balls. See, told you it was amusing.


Oh, it has cock in the name too.
(I helped save b3ta! AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:46, archived)
hahahaha.
Where is that being held?

I got back in touch with Dr Kitteny Berk, which is very nice indeed.
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:48, archived)
Cockermouth.
Really? Wow. There's a name I've not heard of in ages.
(I helped save b3ta! AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:59, archived)
I know, it was weird.
I discovered a google contact from him, it all started from there.
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:00, archived)
I'm drunk enough to say yes.
I've met you. Once. I only remember little bits. But we've met.

I gonna go wank. Anyone want to send me naked pictures of their partners? Please? I'm sad, lonely and desperate! *cries while wanking*
(I helped save b3ta! AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:24, archived)
I think I need to go bed.
I'm getting too excited.
(I helped save b3ta! AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:27, archived)
We've met?
You're not "Rog" are you?
(I helped save b3ta! Kris Fucking Kristofferson, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:29, archived)
Yeah.
I went down south to see a lovely b3tan and came home via Newcastle. I was hijacked by Harpski and force fed drink. We gave a tramp money. It's not exactly a skipping in meddows story. But I do remember some shit. I was pretty much drunk from the second I got to Harpski's to the second I got on the train the next morning.
(I helped save b3ta! AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:36, archived)
Don't forget the sizing contest.
and wheel chairs in the toilets.
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:41, archived)
I remember that too.
Was it you who pushed him to the bar? And people actualy moved to let you order first?

Who was it? He was really tall with impressive sideburns.
(I helped save b3ta! AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:44, archived)
No, I think Jonas was involved in that.
I remember them being unhappy about us 'playing' with the chair.
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:47, archived)
Yeah. He was sat in it
pretending to be a spaz. I think it was the spaz impressions they were more upset at. Not really the use of the chair.
(I helped save b3ta! AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:49, archived)
hahaha
Whoops/
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:00, archived)
Wait, wait, wait.
What about my answer EH!
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:42, archived)
Not next Saturday
But the following defo!
(I helped save b3ta! Kris Fucking Kristofferson, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:44, archived)
Hurrah
I'll see if I can organise something for then as well/
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 2:46, archived)
Haha, cock, yeah.

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:00, archived)
Oh now, you're frothing at the gash.

(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:01, archived)
They can all fuck off.

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:02, archived)
*keeps head down*

(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 11 Jul 2009, 3:05, archived)

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