(gronkpan@vomitinglarry.bsky.social,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:07,
archived)
That is so fucking sad.
So is that article's author, my fuck what total lying twaddle. Not a fucking honest word in the whole fucking thing.
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:12,
archived)
To be a proper liar you have to learn to lie for Jesus.
The shame manifested itself physically, resulting in him losing his hair and purging his body into his socks while shouting "JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! Into your hands I give myself. Left a bit! Oh yeah!"
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:18,
archived)
"He was terrified, I still remember the look on his face . . . it was...very hard...for him, as it was for me"
"I could just see a really broken, unwell man. At that point I found it really quite hard...in that instance it was really hard...However, she maintained...vomiting...and apparent pain. I feel a little bit foolish...but I...beat myself...In the...back,'' she said."
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:27,
archived)
Also
Alterboys, teenbrides, pets, household products or any thing else that can be warmed in a microwave.
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:28,
archived)
also, to bring up my own cancer experience (yet again)...
...i have extremely strong doubts that anyone who is married and has close friends could manage to fake diagnosis and treatment without those close to him puzzling things out rather quickly. it's a huge part of therapy to bring in partners and friends to help with treatment, rides to and from hospital and clinic, and to speak with doctors and nurses about pill regimens and the like.
there's almost zero chance that he faked this on his own.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:31,
archived)
That's a confusing;y written article, right there.
"To conceal the two-year cancer lie which he hid from his wife and family, he sent phoney emails to his loved ones from non-existent medical practitioners."
Surely he's concealing the porn addiction, not the 'cancer lie'. I think the author meant "To maintain the two-year..."
Oh well, anyway.
(The Alchemistking of the needlessly complicated,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:26,
archived)
Jizzing for jesus
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:28,
archived)
oh no! addicted to porn!
how awful - but the knowledge he gained in kicking that habit ought to help him give up his addiction to nonsense superstitions like 'god'.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:27,
archived)
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 5:26,
archived)
God can save you from all your addictions. All you have to do is..do you know what? I'm tired of discussing this subject.
I'll type this story out for lolz and enlightenment.
My ageing father was a Eucharistic Minister for the Catholic Church, taking Communion to the sick and or mental kiddies (and old fuckers).
I questioned his belief in the transubstantiation or Bread-to-Jesus miracle. He was convinced that it happened so I asked him if a mugger accosted him on his way to deliver the Christ into a dying mans face, would he defend the Actual-JesusTM in his pocket.
No, he said. I'm sure the priest wouldn't think it was worth my life to defend it, so I'd just hand it over.
"BUT HE FUCKING DIED FOR YOU!" I shouted.
I think he won though as he told me to fuck off to bed and stop drinking so much.
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:35,
archived)
hahaha!
when i was in uni a friend of mine was shocked to learn i'd never been to a church service before (my parents were agnostic, i grew up an atheist). so, he took me to his rancid little pile of blocks and i watched the whole hilarious scene play out. he was catholic, so at the end (or near it, whatever) of the show the chief nun-herd started handing out crackers and juice. i wanted to go get some, but my friend panicked and physically restrained me so i couldn't - apparently unbaptised people like me can infect the jesus remains if we bite into it.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:43,
archived)
It may take a couple of weeks to get through but it's worth it.
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:47,
archived)
it's great so far. thanks!
"...a cheap excuse to make accusations illustrated by cheesy woodcuts of hook-nosed jews hammering nails into communion wafers and lurid tales of blood-spurting crackers..."
too bad that's too long for a sig.
"no harm come to a cracker" works, though.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:53,
archived)
Unbaptized : aka 'You haven't paid for your dead god parts yet'.
They just are very coy about the ticket and what it costs.
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:49,
archived)
Heh..
..It costs your soul
(Evil_Tedis collecting wooden giblets,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:53,
archived)
Yes, but first they'd like your time, money and children.
THEN they want that too.
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 3:03,
archived)
i just want your money and children.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 5:55,
archived)
We just need someone who wants souls and we'll have a full service pantheon.
Need a trendy name for the cult too. May I suggest "buttsexodonkians"?
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 6:25,
archived)
that works.
and we're all waiting for the second coming of jacob dyer.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 7:51,
archived)
that's usually my reply to people who slag scirentologists.
at least those con artists are partially open about the whole thing being a $cam.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:55,
archived)
Well I think that's debatable that they are open about it being a crock,
It's just easier to prove given some drunk twat just made it up in recent history.
(JeruWar and Piss,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:57,
archived)
no, i meant that it was open knowledge that it costs money to participate.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:58,
archived)
Ask them what happens to African AIDS babies.
This is especially horrid if they are catholics. What of limbo, bitch? Purgamotherfuckintory? What about cunts what live in tha jungle or forests and shit.
Braaaaap.
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:55,
archived)
I think C of E churches are more easy going though, I'm fairly sure my mother took me to do the non transubstatiation communion once despite not being spirit wetted.
You can also pretty much abuse modern local vicars these days too, because they are unfeasibly dull and accommodating.
"What's that you want to film a monologue of your defaming the concept of religion in the vestry? Oh well as long as you don't disturb the other parisheners."
(JeruWar and Piss,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 3:04,
archived)
Ladies without annulments in addition to their divorces like my mother are unworthy too
the filthy whores.
(hankemurphy, I'm a mess,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:55,
archived)
Sell her.
That fixes the whole thing and works by both rules new and old.
I think you can even bang her once the sale is done, if you wanted.
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 3:05,
archived)
Nice.
(hankemurphy, I'm a mess,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 4:02,
archived)
if you remind people that marriage laws are just extensions of property agreements...
...they'll get annoyed and nail you to a stick too.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 4:05,
archived)
I once had a friend who went a bit mental after a rough relationship, and ended up going crazy religious to the extent where she would talk to god.
I asked her to ask him some questions for me. The responses managed to get passages from the bible, which god had supposedly said himself, wrong.
She didn't see this as 'questioning' her faith though.
(JeruWar and Piss,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:45,
archived)
i was in a band with a guy who did a similar thing.
he rewrote the lyrics of our songs to be jesus-fondling pap. they were all shit songs anyway so it didn't matter, but they were suddenly more wonderful that magic gold to him at that point.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:49,
archived)
I find that if anyone is "deeply religious" they have no fucking idea what the bible has in it.
Just nod and call them twats. They deserve it.
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:50,
archived)
Short bus!
*licks windows*
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:01,
archived)
i rode the shortbus in High School :D
...this was not it.
(PedroHinCome along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:34,
archived)
(JamnogSardines in her eyebrows, lobsters up and down,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 2:32,
archived)
and on that electrifying bombshell, goodnight!
got to be at work in 7 hours.
(coobeastieUsed to Be in Evil Gazebo,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:04,
archived)
giga twats
be accurate if you want to invoke SCIENECE
(Rotating Wobbly HatThat's not a banana. THIS is a banana.,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:05,
archived)
Jigga!
It's jigga, goddamnit!
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:06,
archived)
zigg-a-zigg-ah watts
please try to keep up
(Rotating Wobbly HatThat's not a banana. THIS is a banana.,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:08,
archived)
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:12,
archived)
The day that Sporty Spice was voted head of the International Body of Weights and Measures was the day the music died.
Four zig-a-zig-ahhs to the pound? Sixteen four bar harmonies in an imperial pint?
The woman's insane.
HP bidet.
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:13,
archived)
DAMN YOU MELANIE CHISHOLM!
DAMN YOU TO HELL!
(JeruWar and Piss,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:16,
archived)
The only thing she got right was three Melanie Blatt lips to the ounce.
The whole "seven tubs of Shippams paste per seven tubs of Shippams paste" was her darkest hour.
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:20,
archived)
happy day to you.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:49,
archived)
wants!! :D
(prodigy69broke b3ta and made everyone leave,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:05,
archived)
I've been dancing so hard that my big toes are bleeding :D and :(
(the_rhyme_ministerhas a little bit of gold and a pager,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:20,
archived)
That's what you get for wearing high heels.
Try flats next time.
Or a bunglow if you have access.
(JeruWar and Piss,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:24,
archived)
It's what I get for wearing shoes slighty too small for me.
I do love stilletos though.
(the_rhyme_ministerhas a little bit of gold and a pager,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:28,
archived)
I wear shoes which are constantly too small for me.
They are basically the only pair of shoes I own, bar a pair of black leather shoes I only use for vaguely formal wear, and I've had them for god knows how long. They are say they are a size 6. I have size 9 feet.
(JeruWar and Piss,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:30,
archived)
Mine are 13s and I need 14s really.
I'm going to sleep now. BRAP.
(the_rhyme_ministerhas a little bit of gold and a pager,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:32,
archived)
Son?
(wibblywobbly- helping ugly people get laid since 1982,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 1:22,
archived)
I'm downloading a large torrent so I've been avoiding the webternets to save on bandwidth speed. Besides, it's been nice to lie in bed all day catching up on my reading :] 'Ning yourself!
Fantastic film. I also downloaded Full Metal Jacket, as suggested by P3L3, which was brilliant. I still have Apocalypse Now to watch, but I'm downloading Vista because the software's corrupted on my other computer.
(BloopFri 16 Jul, 22:10,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 0:03,
archived)
fucken ace
edit: fuck, it's tomorrow already. good night all
(mictoboyshitting in your cunt since,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 0:04,
archived)
Tops :D
Lovely work :3
(MrPineapple.co.uk - TSHIRTS FOR SALE. I GIVE YOU GOOD PRICE.,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 0:04,
archived)
We're gonna need a bigger blimp.
(Sea Trampthe thinking woman's 8 Ace,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 0:05,
archived)
mindpiss V V V V
(coobeastieUsed to Be in Evil Gazebo,
Sun 31 Aug 2008, 0:08,
archived)
Heh!
9.15am the morning after Roy Scheider blew himself up in that still-unexplained Flymo-nuclear-masturbation tragedy-cum-farce, I had my pic of a matchbox with the "we're gonna need a bigger box" caption primed and ready to go.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 23:11,
archived)
WHAT!
You kid misterbat from andriod cleberity? He has sniger on tlevisoin for fantsie in old day. But dont remember who her marred to for skis death. And always do way instaind mother
(discomeatsThis canoe,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 23:12,
archived)
my 7xl is not yet invented.
earth people!
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 23:13,
archived)
sorry, just the most incomprehensible youtube comment I've seen
:D
(discomeatsThis canoe,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 23:15,
archived)
must be below my threshold, as i can't see it.
(postbearhas metal knees,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 23:16,
archived)
I'd just open the gif in PS and check but I HAVE CS3 SO I CAN'T
(mofaha┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 21:51,
archived)
I was thinking someone had found a way round that
is it still shit then?
(BloopFri 16 Jul, 22:10,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 21:56,
archived)
There's no way to import a gif and preserve its original frame delays.
That's really the problem.
(mofaha┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 21:57,
archived)
ahh, i get it
ta
(BloopFri 16 Jul, 22:10,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 21:59,
archived)
^THIS^
WITH DRAMATIC BIG LETTERS
anyone got a copy of PS7 for a mac?
(JahledThree shades of black,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 21:58,
archived)
What the FUCK is a mac?
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 22:23,
archived)
Utter power
Model Name: Mac Pro Model Identifier: MacPro3,1 Processor Name: Quad-Core Intel Xeon Processor Speed: 2.8 GHz Number Of Processors: 2 Total Number Of Cores: 8 L2 Cache (per processor): 12 MB Memory: 2 GB Bus Speed: 1.6 GHz
(JahledThree shades of black,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 22:26,
archived)
It's not a raincoat then?
(Bingowings2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 22:33,
archived)
Somewhat impractical
it seemed like a right slog up the stair case
(JahledThree shades of black,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 22:35,
archived)
THIS WAS MY 25K POST! MISSED IT!!!
(MstandotI suppose I should post more often.,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 21:42,
archived)
WAY TO GO!
I CAN THINK OF NO BETTER CELEBRATION OF A BRN!
(We are the lemonirked your craw on,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 21:51,
archived)
Congrats!
(mofaha┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 22:01,
archived)
Congrats, Stan
you spoil us with such erotica
(JahledThree shades of black,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 22:16,
archived)
congrats
:)
(kingsuperspecialis in an audience, wanking furiously,
Sat 30 Aug 2008, 22:20,
archived)