
Re-posting - even for the compo - must NOT be done in a new thread, right?
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 9:35,
archived)

Unless you are actually vic reeves, i dbout this is you.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 9:49,
archived)

ahem...
"Depict your true self or your user name via whatever artistic medium you desire"
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 9:53,
archived)
"Depict your true self or your user name via whatever artistic medium you desire"

Vic Reeves is his user name.
Edit : I mean James Moir's user name, not Vic Brown's
*Goes for a lie down*
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 10:04,
archived)
Edit : I mean James Moir's user name, not Vic Brown's
*Goes for a lie down*

My shopping is getting rusty. In my defence, those really are his features.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 9:26,
archived)

( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 10:01,
archived)

was just thinking about you when I saw Bud had come to the end of his road. Goodcat.

I am still grieving, but this is part of what we must endure when we choose to love. He was worth it. I shall cry from time to time, but always remember him fondly, and love him endlessly.
From the good news desk: I have KITTENS
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 3:42,
archived)
From the good news desk: I have KITTENS

you can check my FB for kitteny goodness if you like
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 3:54,
archived)


and yes I shall have a look at your kittens later!

I gave up tobacco last year though, so that's less passive smoke for Mr Moon.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPIsLzPB3tg
~~~\o/~~~
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 3:27,
archived)
~~~\o/~~~

good and chunky in a Danzig kind of vein

I'm watching the Tour de France and b3ta simultaneously. Help.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=BLKHhifylfc
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 4:42,
archived)
www.youtube.com/watch?v=BLKHhifylfc

: D

seems like a picnic after those clips
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 4:50,
archived)

You look like your carrying quads!!! beautiful inflation.
next time tell us how your belly feels and don't hit it.
make beleive you're really carrying 4 babies!!!
imagine what it would feel like if you were in labour????
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 6:34,
archived)
next time tell us how your belly feels and don't hit it.
make beleive you're really carrying 4 babies!!!
imagine what it would feel like if you were in labour????

There are lots of fake inflation vids on youtube, I used one to make this

( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 6:37,
archived)



Just the thing for a sleepless 4:30am.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 12:29,
archived)

then thought it was perfect as is.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 1:17,
archived)

and realises what an utter cock he's being.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 9:55,
archived)


AICMFP
Edit: Having actually met you, I'd say this is pretty good.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 23:43,
archived)
Edit: Having actually met you, I'd say this is pretty good.

did you post this thingy some time ago here?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGbfKZrUsK0
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 0:45,
archived)
www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGbfKZrUsK0


but the only hit in b3ta search for that URL is you posting it yesterday, Kaiser.
HAVE A BANG ON THIS NUMBER MAN

but i'm still wondering where it came from
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 1:14,
archived)




and I made this placard. Any good?

but then again: abetterkuwait.files.wordpress.com/2011/08/orwell-huxley.jpg
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 23:23,
archived)

I must save it somewhere before I watch Big Brother and the shopping channel.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 7:53,
archived)

That crazed, strained expression, just barely keeping it in...
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 23:23,
archived)

RACIST. Im protesting against you portraying brown people as the fringe of society, who are only good for sticking stuff erm... together.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 23:32,
archived)


This week is your chance to go from a faceless web entity to a publicly known, crimewatch photofit picture.
Depict your true self or your user name via whatever artistic medium you desire. Challenge suggested by Bourbon Fox, voted for by you.

What the fuck was this all about?
www.b3ta.com/board/10402621
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:51,
archived)
www.b3ta.com/board/10402621

Or those foreign sweets you got on holiday
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:54,
archived)

those were the epitome of limited number of panes comic
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:55,
archived)

(I was really embarrassed when that hit the FP) :D
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:54,
archived)

And on my birthday, too. I take that as a good sign.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:56,
archived)

Basically, the cock is not domesticated
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:58,
archived)

Suggests such a gangly run
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 23:13,
archived)

Except for mine... I look like a hideous narcissist.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:54,
archived)

they make it hard to see what's going on
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:51,
archived)

while a cat flies a biplane
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:56,
archived)

Fraser's away and there haven't been many suggestions or votes for new challenges this week, so I've gone back in time and picked the most popular challenge suggestions that didn't get chosen in the last 2 months:
Spaghetti/Pasta - make something out of pasta like you did at school or shop something pasta related
Fuck about with comic covers - fairly self explanatory
Make TV/Movie character's lives easier - i.e. If jack in 24 had a Time machine
Self Portrait - depict your true self or user name in whatever artistic medium you desire




Vote fast, God wants to get to bed soon
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:24,
archived)
Spaghetti/Pasta - make something out of pasta like you did at school or shop something pasta related
Fuck about with comic covers - fairly self explanatory
Make TV/Movie character's lives easier - i.e. If jack in 24 had a Time machine
Self Portrait - depict your true self or user name in whatever artistic medium you desire




Vote fast, God wants to get to bed soon

cos I now work til 9:30 on a Wednesday
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:30,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:39,
archived)

just to be on the safe side
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:35,
archived)

The creative outlet of choice for six-year-olds. At least, that's what leading pedagogs seemed to think when I was that age.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:39,
archived)

With glitter, and not the gary kind.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:41,
archived)

Schools can't afford the pasta due to budget cuts
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:43,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:55,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:37,
archived)

Minus ALL THE POINTS to everyone who does so afterwards
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:37,
archived)

![Challenge Entry: Self portrait [challenge entry]](/images/board_posticon_c.gif)
fuck all yall
most suave
Is Pedro a Pooch?








right click_open image imjussayin
spotify:track:0xCs7SjrNOVRnEI6bsHn5O (Right Of Way by Ferry Corsten)










spotify:track:4Li2WHPkuyCdtmokzW2007 (Ni**as In Paris by Jay Z)
www.b3tards.com/u/23925b16ee60d4243068/dogdenial_screencap_pedro_is_a_hoond_imjussayin.jpg
youtu.be/VT7lwdui4HY
spotify:local:::Mark+Ronson+-+Bang+Bang+Bang:232
spotify:track:3kOQ8TnkxvTRk7RXJbH6dh (Eclipse by Talvin Singh)">spotify:track:3kOQ8TnkxvTRk7RXJbH6dh (Eclipse by Talvin Singh) (Eclipse by Talvin Singh)
www.b3tards.com/u/23925b16ee60d4243068/bad_dogdenial_fullfuckapture.jpg
spotify:track:3kOQ8TnkxvTRk7RXJbH6dh (Eclipse by Talvin Singh)
youtu.be/sRJ3LZySmFw
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:41,
archived)
most suave
Is Pedro a Pooch?








right click_open image imjussayin
spotify:track:0xCs7SjrNOVRnEI6bsHn5O (Right Of Way by Ferry Corsten)










spotify:track:4Li2WHPkuyCdtmokzW2007 (Ni**as In Paris by Jay Z)
www.b3tards.com/u/23925b16ee60d4243068/dogdenial_screencap_pedro_is_a_hoond_imjussayin.jpg
youtu.be/VT7lwdui4HY
spotify:local:::Mark+Ronson+-+Bang+Bang+Bang:232
spotify:track:3kOQ8TnkxvTRk7RXJbH6dh (Eclipse by Talvin Singh)">spotify:track:3kOQ8TnkxvTRk7RXJbH6dh (Eclipse by Talvin Singh) (Eclipse by Talvin Singh)
www.b3tards.com/u/23925b16ee60d4243068/bad_dogdenial_fullfuckapture.jpg
spotify:track:3kOQ8TnkxvTRk7RXJbH6dh (Eclipse by Talvin Singh)
youtu.be/sRJ3LZySmFw

whodathunkit?
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:49,
archived)

and what a fine multijape, i particularly love the micky rooney one
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 0:48,
archived)

sadly the KLF version of What Time is Love on mp3 is much louder than the ones on Youtube
bad shit
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 0:52,
archived)
bad shit

First we had Kittycopter, now we have Precessivedog.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 23:03,
archived)

Is the Self Portait one supposed to be real, or a picture depicting our usernames?
That sounds much more fun.
Are we allowed to self portraits of other people?
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:42,
archived)
That sounds much more fun.
Are we allowed to self portraits of other people?

ed: completely misread.
I'd say usernames would be allowed, but I'm not in charge.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:44,
archived)
I'd say usernames would be allowed, but I'm not in charge.

Or our interpretations of other usernames.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:45,
archived)

But you shouldn't have said anything. We'd have all been wondering if teh almighty was screwing around with the spacetime continuum and shit.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:53,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:49,
archived)


( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:58,
archived)

Some of the old ones are bizarre
www.coverbrowser.com/ has loads
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:47,
archived)
www.coverbrowser.com/ has loads

BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK BLEK
edit: actually, those covers are mostly quite funny as it is
edit: maybe I've finally lost it each one comedic
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:54,
archived)
edit: actually, those covers are mostly quite funny as it is
edit: maybe I've finally lost it each one comedic

Or, I should say, a coblektion
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 23:00,
archived)

"portraits", so it doesn't just become in-jokes.
Otherwise... comic covers, please.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 23:01,
archived)
Otherwise... comic covers, please.

That's still pretty incredible in my book.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:20,
archived)

otherwise it's considered a bit odd
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:22,
archived)

Simply cut out the word "Fries" or "Fish 'n' Fries", and stick it over your menu where you have the word "chips"
Problem solved.

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:40,
archived)
Problem solved.


Next up: O2 rationing the amount of oxygen each supporter can take within Olympic Park

when cheering on team GB.
to be honest, when they first showed the logo i thought, what shit, but it's grown on me and i was quite looking forward to the olympics.
but all the blatant 'tax haven' stuff and corporate fuckwangling has really taken the shine off the proceedings.
[edit] also, well done G4S for a utter balls up on security, i suspect they will do the good thing and take a reduced rate in what they were being paid.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:50,
archived)
to be honest, when they first showed the logo i thought, what shit, but it's grown on me and i was quite looking forward to the olympics.
but all the blatant 'tax haven' stuff and corporate fuckwangling has really taken the shine off the proceedings.
[edit] also, well done G4S for a utter balls up on security, i suspect they will do the good thing and take a reduced rate in what they were being paid.

oh wait I'll be the one dampening, nevermind
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:53,
archived)

cash, cheques and *ptuh* mastercard are not accepted
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:55,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:23,
archived)

There are plenty of wierdos out there who would have sex with the crazy guy in the mask.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:28,
archived)

My reply still stands:
"It worked for Clay at his swinger's parties."
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:37,
archived)
"It worked for Clay at his swinger's parties."

pleases SmeeAlso I'm drinking Grolsch it's bruued longah for a fulla tayste
youtu.be/wRuo7dZHHnw
i am manmale

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:22,
archived)
youtu.be/wRuo7dZHHnw
i am manmale


edit: also b3ta.com/board/10805703
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:44,
archived)

If your chips crunch when you eat them you're doing it wrong.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:50,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:52,
archived)

Rather than, say, and undertakers', or a Total Fitness gym.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:54,
archived)

The same happens if you ask for gravy anywhere in the South.
You Shouldn't Have To Microwave It Bitches!
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:54,
archived)
You Shouldn't Have To Microwave It Bitches!

is that it's COMPLETELY FUCKING WRONG
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:56,
archived)

HMMMMMM
That's right
HMMMMMM
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:58,
archived)
That's right
HMMMMMM

My niece wants to make that for me, I keep putting her off. I fear it.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:02,
archived)

JOIN US EH?
JOIN US EH?
JOIN US EH?
YOU CANNOT ESCAPE
*points vigourously and opens mouth wide, bacon falls out*
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:04,
archived)
JOIN US EH?
JOIN US EH?
YOU CANNOT ESCAPE
*points vigourously and opens mouth wide, bacon falls out*

It was a boke-fest from the first word to the last.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:05,
archived)

but it's more addictive than crack
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:47,
archived)

Real gravy that didn't start from a can.
Real hand cut potatoes.
Anything else is caveat ingestor
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 4:15,
archived)
Real hand cut potatoes.
Anything else is caveat ingestor

Proper chippies that is. Northern chippies.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:58,
archived)

Whereas it's actually a lesson for the criminally ignorant.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:59,
archived)

and roll about on the floor
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:00,
archived)

one vat curry
one vat gravy
It's what makes a chippy, damn it.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:59,
archived)
one vat gravy
It's what makes a chippy, damn it.

JOIN US
WITH OUR QUAD OF VATS
JOIN US
JOIN US
*points and breathes in vigorously*
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:02,
archived)
WITH OUR QUAD OF VATS
JOIN US
JOIN US
*points and breathes in vigorously*

THE PEAS
I FORGOT THE PEAS
holy crap :(
yes, an equally large vat of peas
OH OH OH FUCK
and a vat of beans!
how could I forget this!
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:01,
archived)
I FORGOT THE PEAS
holy crap :(
yes, an equally large vat of peas
OH OH OH FUCK
and a vat of beans!
how could I forget this!

scrag, scran, batter, bits and quite likely a myriad terms hithertoo unknown but to LOCALS!
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:05,
archived)

the more we fry
and serve with various innapropriate meta condiments
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:06,
archived)
and serve with various innapropriate meta condiments

scallops? Surely that's some limp-wristed Southern puffery?
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:06,
archived)

scallops?
What is this? the old kent road?!
This has gone from being about MANS chips
with curry, gravy, beans and MUSHY FUCKING PEAS
along with choice of pie, fish, patty, cake etc
TO SCALLOPS!
I weep man, I weep !
Where did it all go wrong?
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:09,
archived)
What is this? the old kent road?!
This has gone from being about MANS chips
with curry, gravy, beans and MUSHY FUCKING PEAS
along with choice of pie, fish, patty, cake etc
TO SCALLOPS!
I weep man, I weep !
Where did it all go wrong?

He's all like, look at me I'm rubbing boiling lardy chips and gravy into my manly chest, and then he's like, oh yeah and here's a rainbow dinosaur and some PONCEY FUCKING SCALLOPS
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:13,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:14,
archived)


I wonder if they'd agree with my digestive system.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:36,
archived)

And there's no pans on. Vats yes - pans no. Vats which have been simmering for so long I'm sure life is forming at the bottom.
And everything is fried, even the picked eggs. And the chips come covered in cheese.
It's heaven. Which is where you'll end up if you eat there more than once a year.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 7:06,
archived)
And everything is fried, even the picked eggs. And the chips come covered in cheese.
It's heaven. Which is where you'll end up if you eat there more than once a year.

When I asked him to just pour it over the chips rather than set that stupid little tub in the bag he looked at me as if I'd asked for a go on his wife.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:57,
archived)

some places don't know what chip butties are
WHAT THE SCREAMING VEGETABLE PLANTATION FUCK!?
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:58,
archived)
WHAT THE SCREAMING VEGETABLE PLANTATION FUCK!?

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:00,
archived)

God I hate that word. Took me three months to work out what the fuck a barm cake was.
And don't get me started on Warburtons bread being wrapped in wax paper. The world has moved on and The North should catch up.
And breathe ...
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:07,
archived)
And don't get me started on Warburtons bread being wrapped in wax paper. The world has moved on and The North should catch up.
And breathe ...

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:10,
archived)

And the fucking bakery is only down the road.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:17,
archived)

I believe they go together in some manner.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:10,
archived)

Call a man "Cock" and don't get punched in the face for it!
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:30,
archived)

but north of yorkshire it'd result in a bloodbath
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:37,
archived)

until you've gone into a chippy and asked for a sausage supper and tried to hand over a bunch of pound notes, you've got no fucking cause to complain
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:01,
archived)

I've been to take aways in the south
I HAVE EVERY FUCKING RIGHT TO COMPLAIN!!!!!one!!!eleven
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:03,
archived)
I HAVE EVERY FUCKING RIGHT TO COMPLAIN!!!!!one!!!eleven

The only place I know with pound notes are the Channel Islands.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:03,
archived)

Pound notes. It was cute how they were trying to be different with their monopoly money.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:11,
archived)

last i knew they were still legal tender, just very rare.
well, i say legal tender. if you believe the nerds on wikipedia they aren't actually legal tender at all, but they're de facto legal tender. yeah.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 0:15,
archived)
well, i say legal tender. if you believe the nerds on wikipedia they aren't actually legal tender at all, but they're de facto legal tender. yeah.

but ten years back pound notes - bank of scotland, i think; i think both clydesdale and rbos had stopped them - were *always* given in change by the butchers in st andrews. i think they had a massive stock of them or something. it wasn't very easy to buy anything with them in england.
for all i know the butchers has shut down and pound notes have finally died.
edit: i just went and checked. the nerds on wikipedia reassure me that pound notes are still issued in scotland, but it's rbos that issue them, not bos. that told me.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 0:14,
archived)
for all i know the butchers has shut down and pound notes have finally died.
edit: i just went and checked. the nerds on wikipedia reassure me that pound notes are still issued in scotland, but it's rbos that issue them, not bos. that told me.

The seem to cycle between till and wallet, never going near a bank so they're slowly getting less and less recognisable as notes.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 7:02,
archived)

passed from the butchers and the pub. i imagine the pub then went and spent them at the butchers, because they never gave them out in change. neither did anyone else.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 11:16,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:01,
archived)

In the American South, gravy is everywhere, and it looks like this: www.google.ca/search?q=sausage+gravy+biscuits&tbm=isch
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 4:21,
archived)

even though I rarely eat patat of any sort
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:19,
archived)

Other than that Mayonnaise works for me, fine.
/wave of the future.
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 9:57,
archived)
/wave of the future.


THERE! I FUCKING SAID IT! LONDON! 2012! ONE IS THE CAPITAL OF THE COUNTRY IN WHICH I LIVE! THE OTHER IS THE YEAR IN WHICH WE ARE ALL LIVING! WHY THE FUCK SHOULD THE TWO COMBINE TO BE A TRADEMARK? FUCK YOU ALL!
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:54,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:06,
archived)

Fuckers.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:10,
archived)

you be saying Olympics next and Summer Games.
you should have a gold medal for your bravery.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:07,
archived)
you should have a gold medal for your bravery.

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:15,
archived)

at a festival of physical health all about then?
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:03,
archived)




*Waits to get sued*
McDonald's UK Front Page (Albeit Briefly)
( ,
Thu 12 Jul 2012, 10:04,
archived)
McDonald's UK Front Page (Albeit Briefly)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:07,
archived)

but now his other problem is got no fucks
what the fuck!
can't fuck no fucks!
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:11,
archived)
what the fuck!
can't fuck no fucks!

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:19,
archived)

how is he breathing
there shouldn't be any gravity so how can he be 'sat' on the rock
where does he shit?
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:46,
archived)
there shouldn't be any gravity so how can he be 'sat' on the rock
where does he shit?


I was asked to do some pictures for this months issue of Time Out Beijing to go along with the main article on trying out Olympic sports
These are staff members who got to try the activities. It's available now I think, pick it up if you are passing a news vendor in Tiananmen Square

it was done as a favour really, think the chap on the left (who is now the Editor) is either a lurker here or an unsigned observer
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 19:38,
archived)

I wouldn't let him near my kids either if I'm being honest
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:10,
archived)

it's probably available in that there London you live in anyway
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 19:36,
archived)

I might not have a ticket, but that's not the point dammit!
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 19:07,
archived)

Bastards. There is a school local to me that caters for kids with 'problems'. Instead of kicking in bus shelters for the last few months they have been making pictures and dioramas in celebration of the Olympics. Some of them are really good and the kids are very proud.
The headmaster called me and asked if we could put them on public display for a while. I had heard the rumours so contacted the Olympic committee to check.
It doesn't matter that we are a registered charity. It doesn't matter that it is a special needs school.
We are NOT allowed to host the display unless we meet certain registration criteria and pay a hefty fee.
So as far as I'm concerned they can stick their synchronised swimming up their arses.
Wankers.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 19:30,
archived)
The headmaster called me and asked if we could put them on public display for a while. I had heard the rumours so contacted the Olympic committee to check.
It doesn't matter that we are a registered charity. It doesn't matter that it is a special needs school.
We are NOT allowed to host the display unless we meet certain registration criteria and pay a hefty fee.
So as far as I'm concerned they can stick their synchronised swimming up their arses.
Wankers.

So even though no-one stands to make any money out of this display, you still have to give money to McLympics?
I knew they were all shits, but ffs.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 19:33,
archived)
I knew they were all shits, but ffs.

charge admission. So, yes, all we'd end up with is a few proud parents, a few kids with a sense of achievement they rarely get and the community perhaps spared some broken glass and graffiti.
True, we might get some pounds in the donations jar that I use to buy my Ferraris, so I suppose it is justified.
I didn't ask the OC how much it was, I just told them to poke it on principal.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 19:51,
archived)
True, we might get some pounds in the donations jar that I use to buy my Ferraris, so I suppose it is justified.
I didn't ask the OC how much it was, I just told them to poke it on principal.

Then when the Olympics lawyers write threatening letters, go to the tabloids. "Special needs school and charity told : ditch your free exhibition or we'll sue". Tabloids love that kind of shit.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:09,
archived)

but the tabloids are not tame and you can end up anywhere doing that.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:16,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:17,
archived)

This is a worryingly valid idea.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:16,
archived)

there won' t any threatening letters. if there is, take down the display.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:10,
archived)

I cannot run the place on ifs and maybes. I need to produce leaflets and timetables. I try very hard to be professional, so if i say there is an Olympic display, then there is one when someone turns up to see it, not a display of flower arranging and an apology.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:29,
archived)

...to add to a very long list of reasons for me to despise the Olympics. What repellent moneygrubbing vainglorious coldhearted parastical cunts. You should publicise this big time and embarrass the fuck out of the turds.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 19:48,
archived)

I spoke today to a representative of London 2012 Olympics about your
displaying the Olympic Rings-0845 2672012. I explained your role and
the fact that you were merely going to display work done by school
children. He was adamant that the rings could not be included. They
can only be displayed etc. by "commissioned bodies". He was reading
from a list of prepared questions and answers and said this question
is frequently put to them.
I am sure this will be a blow to the two schools involved. Can they
somehow omit them or cover them up? I would be willing to speak to
whoever if you wish.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:10,
archived)
displaying the Olympic Rings-0845 2672012. I explained your role and
the fact that you were merely going to display work done by school
children. He was adamant that the rings could not be included. They
can only be displayed etc. by "commissioned bodies". He was reading
from a list of prepared questions and answers and said this question
is frequently put to them.
I am sure this will be a blow to the two schools involved. Can they
somehow omit them or cover them up? I would be willing to speak to
whoever if you wish.

...displaying the pictures but covering the Olympic Rings where they appear - as suggested by the Locog apparatchik - with stickers reading LOCOG ARE CUNTS? Or LOGOG = 'picture-of-classic-pink-b3ta-cock'? Or simply CENSORED DUE TO LOCOG DEMAND FOR FEES? I can't get over how despicable they are, every fucking day produces yet another example of how morally bankrupt and obscene these Games are.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:36,
archived)

but my visitors aren't the political type, and I think the message would be wasted. We try to cater for everyone but it is mainly schools, old ladies and grand old chaps with real medals. (not ones for running fast)
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:20,
archived)

well made.
But I don't half meet some characters. Some, admittitedly, like Rimmer.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:40,
archived)
But I don't half meet some characters. Some, admittitedly, like Rimmer.

It just popped into my head and insisted I post it.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:45,
archived)

Personally, I'm done with it.
Sorry about your situation
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 19:52,
archived)
Sorry about your situation

It's only now that the commercialism of the whole thing shows through the cracks to such a degree.
And isn't it ironic that one of the main sponsors of an event based around health and fitness, is McDonald's?
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 19:55,
archived)
And isn't it ironic that one of the main sponsors of an event based around health and fitness, is McDonald's?

Like competitive drinking, or Street Fighter 2.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:10,
archived)

some folk can only do it once and burn out, some can fucking flounce HARD and often! They are truly Flouncemasters.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:41,
archived)

... we might be able to summon up Bou.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:14,
archived)

Their Saccharine-Flounce God Moggy has their hearts now.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:36,
archived)


except perhaps blackjack
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:02,
archived)

the spastics can rename their shit after the commonwealth games, bet that licence fee is far cheaper. You need to be more of an objective thinker
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:02,
archived)

unless there's something important missing from your story.
Their FAQ is clear on this:
School project? check
Non commercial? check
Go ahead and display, forget who you talked to.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:07,
archived)
Their FAQ is clear on this:
School project? check
Non commercial? check
Go ahead and display, forget who you talked to.

a school project is not normally open to the public, as we are, even though we are not commercial.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:13,
archived)

We, as a charity, are naturally fund raisers.
"Nor can the protected marks be used for fund raising purposes"
As we ask people to come and see the exhibition then ask for donations, we fall into this. That is what they told me.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:59,
archived)
"Nor can the protected marks be used for fund raising purposes"
As we ask people to come and see the exhibition then ask for donations, we fall into this. That is what they told me.

too much to type on phone thrice, amounted to interpret faq as you like and then just do it!
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:19,
archived)

i'd add, why not explicitly ask people not to donate "because otherwise our partners on the london olympics organising committee will sue us", and add a second advert for, i don't know, an exhibition of "non-olympic art" in a back room, which turns out to be a picture of a girl with blonde hair, a rude penguin, and a discreet donations box?
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:59,
archived)

are vaugely aware of my 'art', I'm not sure they like it. I tell a lie, I know they don't, unless 'That's nice Dear' counts as critical acclaim.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 22:20,
archived)

There is no other private brand which is supported in this way.
Either it is a public event, in which case this shite stops, or it is not, in which case security is funded by the Games, not by us.
Fucking shite.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:28,
archived)
Either it is a public event, in which case this shite stops, or it is not, in which case security is funded by the Games, not by us.
Fucking shite.

seriously, go straight to the press with this
fuck all this torch carrying headline shit
show them up for the shitbags they are
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:37,
archived)
fuck all this torch carrying headline shit
show them up for the shitbags they are

I have enough trouble running the charity as it is, without making enemies or deals with the Devil (tabloids).
Although I have a big gob sometimes, I generally don't pick fights.
Especially ones I might lose.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:49,
archived)
Although I have a big gob sometimes, I generally don't pick fights.
Especially ones I might lose.

The extra publicity wouldn't hurt, either.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:32,
archived)

( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:34,
archived)

i nearly choked on my £15 fish and chips.
can you not call it a jubilee sports event to celebrate the Queen?
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:21,
archived)
can you not call it a jubilee sports event to celebrate the Queen?

But enclose a tiny, separately-wrapped, deep-fried fragment of fish.
Reminds me a little of this :
www.worldcupblog.org/world-football/swedish-burger-chain-defies-mcdonalds-and-uefa.html
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:15,
archived)
Reminds me a little of this :
www.worldcupblog.org/world-football/swedish-burger-chain-defies-mcdonalds-and-uefa.html

is how most places seem to serve fish and chips these days
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 20:18,
archived)

last three olympics no chips at all. Lococks got special permission to have fish and chips
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:21,
archived)

That since UPS are the Olympic Carrier of Choice, that any providers within the Olympic sphere have to pay a surcharge of up to £25 if they want their packages to be delivered by their usual carrier.
Putting the fun in fun and games.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 21:25,
archived)
Putting the fun in fun and games.

And when I looked away from the computer I found two hours had passed.
( ,
Wed 11 Jul 2012, 18:52,
archived)
« Older messages | Newer messages »
