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# meh, only about 4 years late with the joke
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 2:48, archived)
# then do her tongue sticking out
and it's all burned, and the text is "and I licked it".
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 3:01, archived)
# I mean, if you're going to make a shit joke
at least put as much shit into it as you can :)
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 3:02, archived)
# ha ha!
err... i mean, you 'orrible bastard
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 3:04, archived)
# Hey, I'm not knocking it.
There's a rumour that one or two of my 'jokes' may possibly have been shit :)
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 3:07, archived)
# no, i've never heard that.
is it true?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 4:27, archived)
# I couldn't possibly comment
but no, they're all comedy gold.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 6:39, archived)
# i heard you had a good one about fall fashions though
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 4:55, archived)
# See, this is what I thought, I thought it was growing in popularity,
but SOME PEOPLE ON THIS WEBSITE DO NOT AGREE.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 6:39, archived)
# If only we could see it again.
Will no-one hear our plea?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 9:37, archived)
# At this time of year I think we'd be better off looking for something a bit less autumnal
Perhaps Mofaha could come up with a spring-themed joke?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 10:32, archived)
# ^
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 3:03, archived)
# :)
all the shit hummus i can muster for one evening
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 4:55, archived)
#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 10:11, archived)
#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 3:09, archived)
# Sorry
My one and only FP


(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 7:44, archived)
# .

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 7:49, archived)
#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 8:17, archived)
# hahaha...
is that actually him then?

Never seen that mug before
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 8:28, archived)
# Yeah
he had a youtube channel that was in the newsletter years ago
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 8:43, archived)
# hahah
wonderful
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 9:09, archived)
# christ
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 10:24, archived)
# brilliant
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 11:25, archived)
# wood... etc...
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 8:27, archived)
# Hahahaha - Spot On
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 10:48, archived)
# Clickety!
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:20, archived)
# it looks like Alice Cooper
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 9:04, archived)
#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 9:05, archived)
# Oompah loompah, oompity da
Pretend you're bisexual, you will go far.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 9:39, archived)
#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 10:48, archived)
# Legs that stretch up to heaven...
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:00, archived)
#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 2:37, archived)
# :)
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 2:47, archived)
# "Where is Veruca Salt?"
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 2:56, archived)
# Next to Veruca's space bar?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 8:28, archived)
# ooof
not on a mac ;)
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 10:39, archived)
# World's cutest frog?
Yes, I would say so. GC negative, although I don't really know what I'm supposed to be searching on...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBkWhkAZ9ds
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:45, archived)
# That's a lovely frog.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:49, archived)
# it seems you turned left, when you needed to turn right
when you needed to turn right
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:53, archived)
# It does indeed
It does indeed.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:56, archived)
# Fuck this isn't /links!!
Ah damn I'm tired. Sorry all :(
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:54, archived)
# apology accepted
now provide a pic, or get naked and bend over
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:56, archived)
# ahh, help, err.... here you are
I'm not naked, but I am bent over, and there's a cat in it! And it's shopped, kinda. That's good enough, right? Right?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:12, archived)
# you are david cameron!
aicmfp

ok, 50p
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:17, archived)
# I am not David fucking Cameron
So return that £5 this instant!!!!!
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:18, archived)
# *runs*
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:19, archived)
# come back here
you cad!
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:21, archived)
# not likely mister!
and i prefer bounder
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:27, archived)
# stand well back
that squeak means it's angry
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:56, archived)
# I keep waiting for it to blow up like a pufferfish.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:57, archived)
# i saw this cute frog in york

i just noticed how disappointed the dog looks
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:57, archived)
# has anyone noticed that the b3taday candle looks like a goatse?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:05, archived)
# i want to put my head inside it
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:09, archived)
# Bask in its warmth
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:12, archived)
# it smells funny
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:19, archived)
# mmmm
36.8 degree comfort, ahhhhh
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:20, archived)
# OMFG LOL IT LOOKS LIKE A CANDLE
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 3:04, archived)
# You probably meant to post this on /links
about 4 days ago, before it was posted there.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 3:03, archived)
# Yes
But I don't believe you about the 4 days ago thing
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 8:25, archived)
# Only just heard the news


I can't believe he's gone.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:53, archived)
# Cloth-eared git....
Margo was very tall, wasn't she?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:54, archived)
# Apparently 'they're all the same height when they lay down"
Or so the mental rapey looking dude down my local always says when he sees a woman any taller than about 5 and a half feet tall.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:08, archived)
# Christ.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:35, archived)
# 'Fucks sake
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:54, archived)
# pffft!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:56, archived)
# I had to check incase Richard Pryor was just made re-dead.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:57, archived)
# ...and, well, is he?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:27, archived)
# Nah - no-one's raised him from the dead yet.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:28, archived)
# shame
though he was rubbish in superman
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:28, archived)
# Hahaha
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:57, archived)
# barbara windsor? dead?
shame. She looked hot in tartan slacks.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:06, archived)
# the hands!
are microsoft having a joke?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:08, archived)
# I remember that source image...
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:14, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:37, archived)
# "Ooh, stick you!"
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:38, archived)
# No no no. He is saying PO.... look just forget it!
*sulks*
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:45, archived)
# Poo, shit, loo?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:46, archived)
# I feel a flounce coming on
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:47, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:53, archived)
# I prefer Outdoor Fresh scent
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 3:31, archived)
# She's gonna blow!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:57, archived)
# pooh stick those?
or is it Post-it notes?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:41, archived)
# I'm not playing these silly games
*continues to sulk*
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:46, archived)
# boil em, mash em, cover em in poo
Like some nightmarish Bo Selecta sketch
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:44, archived)
# I'm just reading the bottom line
Yes it is a bit
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:48, archived)
# ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh potatoes
genuinely had no idea (not a fan of Harry Potter)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:48, archived)
# Not listening not listening
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:50, archived)
# he's just being a twat
if it helps, i got the joke - i've seen that episode of robin hood
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:55, archived)
# FFS
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:58, archived)
# I may well be a twat
but I honestly couldn't get 'potatoes' from the weird mouth movement, which I am sure is nothing to do with Frogbeat's excellent work and purely the fault of the mouth actor. Still looks like Po Say so's
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:58, archived)
# Hahahaha
Yes it's the mouth actors fault. I'm not using him again!
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:00, archived)
# Look, you didn't pay me enough for a blowie AND to do this properly as well.
You get what you pay for.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:02, archived)
# You fucked both up
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:03, archived)
# It was that Rupert Grint mask you made me wear.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:09, archived)
# I told you NOT to cut the eye holes out though
It just made it fucking creepy :(
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:11, archived)
# chill, dude
calling you a twat was part of the joke. you're no twat.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:07, archived)
# Well it wasn't funny
Off to bed you go and overnight think about what you have said.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:12, archived)
# I didn't take offence at it either way
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 7:12, archived)
# Haha
Im no real fan of Dungeons and Dragons either, but i do love that scene. Its where my user name comes from, y'know.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:56, archived)
#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:01, archived)
# 'washed'?
RIS - i dont get it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:05, archived)
# No no no he's...
FUCK THIS SHIT I'M OFF TO BED.
Night all :)
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:09, archived)
# Most people brush their teeth or have a glass of horlicks before bed
Having intercourse with faeces is just wrong.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:18, archived)
# Well I'm on to the Penny face now
It's a bit low res but it will do the trick
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:30, archived)
# :D
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 7:13, archived)
# WANT!
:)
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:08, archived)
#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:12, archived)
# HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:13, archived)
# Its not snowing here...
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:17, archived)
# ...oh.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:53, archived)
# yeah, i know, shopped pics only
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:18, archived)
# I've not read any of her books
but I agree with her on how the media depicts high profile women
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:26, archived)
# ^what she said
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:39, archived)
# i read a few of the opinion pieces and the article itself
and i agree with you, i just think she wrote her article particularly badly
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:13, archived)
# which is strange, what with all he awards she's had for being a good writer.
i've not read any of her stuff, i expect it's all 50 shades of the time travellers bridget jones, or some other such nonsense.

every time i see her i think it's dame barbara cartland, back from the dead and without her make-up on.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:32, archived)
# Hahahaha
I fucking love this!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:37, archived)
#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 10:21, archived)
# Too Soon?

(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:32, archived)
# hahaha
"i thought i heard someone on the balcony. so i got up and went out there. i didn't put on my prosthetic legs. why not? because i wasn't running a fucking race, that's why not you stupid judge cunt! i'll kill you! i'll fucking kill you!"
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:35, archived)
# ITS CHOWDA! CHOWDA! ILL KILL YOU ALL!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:41, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:38, archived)
# its the new 'LOL'
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:42, archived)
# Blegh!
Don't do that!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:44, archived)
# I had a dream at the weekend
that I had opened a pub called The Comic Sans
The theme being that all the signage/menus etc were written in Times New Roman
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:53, archived)
# I would spend time there if the signs/menus all used Lucida Console
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:03, archived)
# this could work
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:17, archived)
# do everything in an ultra light font
so that people can't read it.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 1:35, archived)
# Comic Sans Solo!
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 10:51, archived)
#
I wonder if this works
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:55, archived)
# <font face="Comic sans MS" size="2">
Lets you type your replies in comic sans in the preview screen. The board seems to strip the tag when you post it though.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:57, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:00, archived)
# lol pedro u such a teez.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:02, archived)
# durr-hurr-u-bin-trolled-LOL
u mad bro?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:03, archived)
#
you can underline though
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:04, archived)
#
[deleted]
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:06, archived)
#
WOW!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:06, archived)
#
I KNOW
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:08, archived)
#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 0:15, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:10, archived)
# <Derpy blue dinosaur head>DURR HURR BRURR</Derpy blue dinosaur head>
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:18, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:56, archived)
# you can use <marquee> in preview too
/board is a cunt
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:04, archived)
# posting on /talk is a lot like this...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:20, archived)
# BTW, / talk misses you -- they sent warm holiday wishes
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:26, archived)
# u wonder if what works
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:57, archived)
# I'm stuck. Any help guys?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:25, archived)
# FZQO XKF
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:26, archived)
# yay
winnar!!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:32, archived)
# Not a fan?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:28, archived)
# does it
show?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:34, archived)
# Deactivate your Facebook
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:30, archived)
# Fuzz Fox
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:45, archived)
# erm...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:11, archived)
# sp...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:13, archived)
# Bindun by Herman
I haven't seen it but it must have been!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:17, archived)
# lol
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:19, archived)
# This is too perfect
hahahaha
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:24, archived)
# Hahaha
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:25, archived)
# hahaha
superb
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:28, archived)
# Hahaha
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:31, archived)
# {:-D
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:32, archived)
# hahaha
true that
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:19, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:17, archived)
# Haha

(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:33, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:25, archived)
# Oh what
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:18, archived)
# that took me ages to read that as hi
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:25, archived)
# I dropped out of arranging things school
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:27, archived)
# 1:30 chunky-styled ewww
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:24, archived)
# spuff!!!!
:D
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:56, archived)
# I'm new here. Be nice.


EDIT: Yeah, okay. I went for cheap point-scoring with a picture of a tory being whacked over the head. Judge me if you must, but I only did it because I wanted you to like me. At least I'm brave enough to admit my hopes, desires and weaknesses. I bet you still haven't spoken to that girl you like, have you? Well then. Get off my back.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:21, archived)
# hello new person, welcome aboard!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:25, archived)
# Look at me!
No, I am serious. Fucking look at me.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:44, archived)
# *glances*
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:45, archived)
# *glarmstrongs*
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:47, archived)
# :D
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:49, archived)
# Hello, Sausage Spotter.
Welcome to b3ta.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:25, archived)
# To tell you the truth
I've actually been here for quite some years.

Just watching… Admiring you from a distance… Going through your bins…

You know how it is.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:30, archived)
# we like the ones that do their research
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:31, archived)
# oh my!
in that case, everyone should get naked!

*unzips*
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:31, archived)
# Was I the only one
already naked?

Again?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:35, archived)
# But you lead the way
with your "light"

(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:36, archived)
# It's quite heavy actually.
You do mean my gut right?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:42, archived)
# lolz
You'll have someone's eye out with that thing!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:44, archived)
# I like where this is going.
Is this some sort of initiation ritual?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:00, archived)
# nah, you just posted when some odd people were logged in
:D
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:02, archived)
# When are the 'safe' times to post?
I wasn't aware there was such a thing.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:13, archived)
# About 3.30 AM
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:34, archived)
# This is permissible behaviour.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:32, archived)
# You dirty little...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:32, archived)
# worst noob ever
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:33, archived)
# Oh hai, stalker :)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:38, archived)
# Long term lurking is needed to gain a NVQ First Post
I lurked for years then posted shite.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:53, archived)
# I lurked for a few weeks
and then posted shite. This was the best of my first week's posting:
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:55, archived)
# Is that the lesbe-bloke from big brother a few years back?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:01, archived)
# My filename tells me it's David Gray or Grey whichever he was
and my dim memory of those halcyon days of 2005 that he masqueraded as some kind of musician, but I feel neither my memory nor my filename should be taken as particularly trustworthy
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:03, archived)
# is that skrillex he is eating?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:15, archived)
# I had to Google Skrillex
but having done so, yes, yes, I think it is.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:17, archived)
# hahaha
anything involving george osborne taking shots to the head with a cricket bat is good in my books.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:27, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:43, archived)
# *snort*
You have much to teach me, wise one.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:51, archived)
# Listen to that friendly Mr Icke
The lizards are in it to win

and they'll stop at nothing.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:54, archived)
# haha....gave me a chuckle
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:27, archived)
# Hi ya
Well that's a nice start =]
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:27, archived)
# welcome
you will do well here
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:30, archived)
# This won't stop the DWP expensively sending out love letters
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:31, archived)
# Hi :)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:39, archived)
# I don't know how to feel about that.…
It's hard to tell if the act was truly consensual.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:49, archived)
# Oh my
Repulsed and excited at the same time
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:51, archived)
# Apparently Osborne was sitting on the toilet when it happened.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:41, archived)
# Welcome new person.
Pull up a kitten, shop a benefit cheat etc etc
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:43, archived)
# Toptastic
You are off to a good start. Pull up a bunker etc
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:49, archived)
# Hahaha, Hello snorkers! welcome aboard good oh!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:54, archived)
# Have you ever read The Cruel Sea, by any chance?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:52, archived)
# Hurray for Tory head bats
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:11, archived)
# :D
nicely done.. and not a flame in sight :)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:14, archived)
# We're all well fluffy here
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:16, archived)
# Atomic called me the 'worst noob ever', but I think he's just playing me.
You know – opening the conversation on a negative point in order to get my attention before switching it up and laying on the sugar.

He'll have my bra off by end of the night.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:26, archived)
# you really
shouldn't let him wear it
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:38, archived)
# Welcome :)
Stay a while and enjoy the fluffiness of b3ta
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:22, archived)
# Well done grasshopper.
(See what I did there?)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:23, archived)
# Hi!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:49, archived)
# Hi!
You're the one who made the Hitler cat! What an honour!

Will you sign my chest?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:22, archived)
# Mythical Monster mini challenge!
Shop or draw or photograph a mythical monster before the sun rises!*
1. Cyclops!


*or don't, no worries :D
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:20, archived)
# omg like monters
I draw a monter

but what kinds of monter am I draw

I don' tknkow

I los jt o to typing. gk.. boats.

Confused now.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:24, archived)
# the penultimate sentence is my favourite and best
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:25, archived)
# Yeah, that was fun
it was like, so long ago, we laughed, we laughed in the long grass as the sun slowly set, the shadows growing longer, how we laughed, the shadows, reaching into our hearts, we laughed, the darkness, we laughed so much, the darkness in our soul.. our souls.

We woke up surrounded by so much blood, we laughed.

Ah, such a happy time.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:29, archived)
# you touched me.
never forget
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:30, archived)
# I still feel.. lightly moistened from that heady time
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:32, archived)
# This canoe is shit
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:26, archived)
# meanwhile, in china
獨木舟上的表現,是和諧的。
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:28, archived)
#
ハーモニカパドル西方
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:30, archived)
#
今ではパドリングだ!

Hah it even tried to correct me with the correct but grammatically bad phrase. GOOGLE KNOWS THINGS
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:33, archived)
#
彼のお尻!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:35, archived)
#
私のクソセメントはどこだ!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:36, archived)
#
セメント肛門インタフェース後悔
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:40, archived)
#
私は複数の漏れの指を持っている
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:41, archived)
# private fish
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:30, archived)
# oh hai cerberus!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:39, archived)
# wanky shit daemon!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:37, archived)
# I'd love to, but I'm off to work in half an hour.
If I'm back, (and still awake), before sunrise, I'll definitely give it some serious consideration.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:26, archived)
# take a photo of the creatures of the night that you meet!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:27, archived)
# The things that wander around Heathrow in the wee small hours don't show up on film.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:31, archived)
# That's purrrdy
this is the closest thing i have
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:39, archived)
# ah, the barrel barrelled nutmonkey
Quite a foe to many an adventurer, but the reward of it's tasty juices is worth the great risk

/mmorpg blog
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:40, archived)
# I believe this existed
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:41, archived)
# and this celestial cow

(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:05, archived)
# Norman would like to be included
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:47, archived)
# can it be milked?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:49, archived)
# If you're gentle.
No manly, rough hands.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:52, archived)
# that's ok, I'll use my gentle girl hands
but it does mean digging them back out of the garden
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:54, archived)
# He will fuck you up!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:51, archived)
# that's pretty awesome :D
I imagine it's massive and a spear weirdling man would only comes up to its wrist
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:53, archived)
# Let me check, hold on.
EDIT: Oh, it's kinda just frog size. Gutted :(
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:56, archived)
# The things in my nightmares have nightmares about things like this
Do horses have neightmares?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:12, archived)
# Totally drawin a monter right here
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:10, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:13, archived)
# i done a photo
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:21, archived)
# Nice strainer
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:30, archived)
# elaborate sneakers
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:38, archived)
# Was that the third Olympic Mascot?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:22, archived)
# Fear my art skillz. (and the shit joke)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 22:47, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:53, archived)
# damn you sun!!!
kids love the olympics photo madkidolympics2.jpg
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:01, archived)
[challenge entry] pilots so lazy they cant even be arsed to shag the air hostesses.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:14, archived)
# Hahaha
And once again... nicely
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:18, archived)
# Eats shoots and flies.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:28, archived)
# :-)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:59, archived)
[challenge entry] :)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:01, archived)
# haha, is that a real guitar?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:02, archived)
# Ha-ha! Splendid.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:03, archived)
# Furniture for bears, whatever next :)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:08, archived)
# Ladies and Gents...
Pandamonium! Clickage.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:09, archived)
# This rocks.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:16, archived)
# =D
Go on boy
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:17, archived)
# Haha rocking :-)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:52, archived)
# He does look a bit Emo ...
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 9:45, archived)
# :D
clicks
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 10:19, archived)
# biro doodle

... the drowned man
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:54, archived)
#
Toilet Duck
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:56, archived)
#
What? wher?

*splat*

Killed by toilet.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:57, archived)
# You got fair warning, man.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:00, archived)
# "Moggy getting angry about lavatories"
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:00, archived)
#
well well well
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:01, archived)
#
ah ... there's some baked beans on his cuff!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:04, archived)
# It should be required reading in all senior schools.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:02, archived)
#
I begin to move your intuition
I squatted in a bowl
Brown was tired of my butt
The hole in the feces of dogs
After the meeting, I will clean up
Toilet seat
Duck, I use the toilet bleach
In order to maintain a clean and tidy

When my bowel begins to move
I squat over the bowl
My brown runs out and then I flush
The ordure down the hole
After a dump I like to clean
The toilet and its seat
Bleach and toilet duck I use
To keep it nice and neat
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:07, archived)
# Powerful.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:13, archived)
# Thanks!! XD
Although I'm struggling to see how 'bowel' becomes 'intuition' after a few back-and-forths :|
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:18, archived)
# That's no moo ...
Oh, hang on ...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:57, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:07, archived)
#
"this is your brain on drugs"
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:10, archived)
# that's very moving
language of the soul....about beans
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:13, archived)
#
bottom of that bucket needs looking at too, it's getting rusty
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:14, archived)
# "There's a hole in ma bucket....................."
:)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:17, archived)
# Arf!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:15, archived)
# you coy muthah
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:18, archived)
#

(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:27, archived)
#
it's the bottom of a well you fucking prick
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:30, archived)
# I love you
I want... you.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:34, archived)
#
... I want to be you, I want to be inside you ... ?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:41, archived)
# I'm already inside me
and the circle is complete
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:42, archived)
# hahahahahahah
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:29, archived)
# cheating bastard


/better late than never
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:11, archived)
# took me a while
so gonna cost him
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:24, archived)
# : (
rissing
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:37, archived)
# always happy to help :)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:41, archived)
# I'm getting sea sick.
:)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 21:20, archived)
# lance armstrong
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:47, archived)
# Ah
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:53, archived)
# nicely
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:54, archived)
# My drug trophies!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:56, archived)
[challenge entry]

Inspired by/ripped off from Claptonista: www.b3ta.com/board/10929541
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:26, archived)
# Yay :-)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:33, archived)
# Yes!
*clicks*
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:33, archived)
# Walking the earth like Caine from 'Kung Fu'.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:35, archived)
# When I was on cloud cuckoo land suffering from amphetimine psychosis and too much acid as a teen..
I spent a summer living in a tent. and I used to travel round with my sleeping bag rolled up hanging around my neck from a peice of string because I thought it made me look like him, and playing the kung fu theme on my bamboo flute as I walked along!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:40, archived)
# I hope you found the spiritual peace you sought by regularly kicking the shit out of small-town villains.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:46, archived)
# Haha no.
But I did always used to write pointy snide revues on note paper of ever pub meal I had and leave it on the plate folded in half, on the out side I would always write "TIP, for the cook book and not the bank book" if that counts!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:50, archived)
# Un-ber-feckin-lievable.
Well done...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:53, archived)
# Haha!
I always strugled at the time to understand why people didn't like me very much!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:57, archived)
# *likes your style*
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:00, archived)
# They didn't! ;-)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:02, archived)
# Hahahaha
A great tactic if you're not recognisable and/or you don't intend to go back. Else you would have ended up eating gallons of body fluids.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:37, archived)
# Unfortunately I had long hair and beard Morrison style so was very recognizable and did used to go back!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:42, archived)
# Unless your cooks tips were
NOT ENOUGH SPUNK
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:00, archived)
# The gravy lacked piss and not enough gob in the mash!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:03, archived)
# Nothing creams up mash potatoes
like a big ol' glob of lung buter
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:09, archived)
# One bamboo to rule them all.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:37, archived)
# \o/ cute
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:49, archived)
# Oh Yes
w/y/h!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:10, archived)
# wow!
if only I had the skillz!
that's ace : )
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:23, archived)
# Ideas generally beat execution.
Wish I'd thought of this one myself!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:44, archived)
# Excellent
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:31, archived)
# :D
Nicely
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:49, archived)
# houpla!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 20:22, archived)
# one way ticket please
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:56, archived)
# \o/
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:57, archived)
# Yay Oscar Tiem!

(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:10, archived)
# Haha nice
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:57, archived)
# His story has more holes than his girlfriend's face...........jusssayin'
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:01, archived)
# "I was asleep in bed with my girlfriend. It was very hot, so I decided to get up and collect a fan from the balcony.
I then heard a noise from the bathroom. Feeling very vulnerable, (it was pitch black and I wasn't wearing my prosthetic legs), I picked up my gun, shouted and fired four shots through the bathroom door. On returning to the bedroom, I realised my girlfriend was no longer in bed. Fearing that I'd made a terrible mistake, I used a cricket bat to break down the bathroom door. She was lying on the floor, bleeding to death."

Translates as: "Following a heated argument with my girlfriend, she locked herself in the bathroom. I was so angry that I picked up my gun and fired four shots through the bathroom door, killing her."
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:25, archived)
# I always shoot through locked doors, because there's always intruders behind them.
In fact, upon entering someone's house illegally, the best thing to do is lock yourself in the bathroom and wait to be shot at.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:33, archived)
# The fast-getaway merchants know nothing about the true ways of burglary.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:36, archived)
# I heard an argument in the bathroom. I shot through the door, thinking it was a burglar raping my girlfriend who was asleep in my bed...
...uh...no...she was in the bathroom screaming at me to get my gun and shoot through the door, after I already shot through the door....I thought she was asleep, but I woke up because I need a fan, when I got the fan she got mugged by a burglar and locked in the bathroom. "I'll save you, Dear!"...I got a cricket bat...I killed you and now I will save you...I mean the burglar killed her and vanished after I shot through the door...They had an argument about hiding in bathrooms. Good thing I had my gun. I'm innocent.............and not guilty at all.................. since it was all a mistake...and all.....I DON'T WANT TO GO TO JAIL!!!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:49, archived)
# He doesn't have a leg to -
Ah fuck it, you can fill in the rest.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:50, archived)
# he don't have a leg
period
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:54, archived)
# A burglar took them and VANISHED.
VANISHED...like he wasn't there AT ALL.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:00, archived)
# I'm waiting for it to get desperate, and for the defence to rely on tales about the trauma of lost limbs and/or the particular side effects of the prescription medicine he might have been taking.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:59, archived)
# Won't be long now...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:00, archived)
# hahaha
it was great acting and the story, epic! But why was the court scene filmed in the dragon's den?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:15, archived)
# Ha! Mind if I join you?
That not guilty plea in full:
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:18, archived)
# arf!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:28, archived)
# he looks kinda like guy pearce in this picture
at least the resulting movie is gonna cast itself
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:32, archived)
# hahaha
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:49, archived)
# Pfft.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:25, archived)
# Haha took me a minute there!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:33, archived)
# :)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:33, archived)
# As I told a friend last night.....
No matter how strong my feeling where for Barbara, I could never be truely happy with her because I was so much in love with Margo...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:37, archived)
# I didn't appreciate Margo until I got older
she was a fox!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:53, archived)
# And really strict as well! ;-)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:04, archived)
# I'm glad
you didn't include the throbbing red sword in that post.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:06, archived)
# It emptied it's battery at the mere thought of Margo!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:18, archived)
# Oh, I thought it was just an energy-saving lightsabre.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:36, archived)
# A 70's floresent one!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:42, archived)
# FEET, JERRY!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:07, archived)
# Haha!
I used to like Sybil Fawlty too, if you can see a patern emerging!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:20, archived)
# I can. Please tell me this pattern stops before Barbara Woodhouse
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:22, archived)
# Arrrg no! pass the mind bleach! ;-)
There again I do like walkies...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:32, archived)
# Mary Whitehouse?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:37, archived)
# late reply
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 23:50, archived)
# Hehe
"Feet, Jerry."
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:44, archived)
# 8D
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:26, archived)
# hahaha, very good, got me thinking of this
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:35, archived)
#
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:40, archived)
# Sorted
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:34, archived)
# well it can search for me
i'm going home
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:56, archived)
# Yay can't wait...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:02, archived)
# Antique stylings make it a must-have.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:04, archived)
# That bat'll get a nice tan ;-)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:07, archived)
# Nifty saber.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:09, archived)
# It was your Fathers......
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:11, archived)
# =D
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:08, archived)
# a searchlight on a wheel
who would even think of that? i'm laughing like a loon at having found the picture.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:30, archived)
# toop toop
brim brim.

Although: I look at that smiling face and manner of garb and all I can hear is Toad from Wind in the Willows going "Toot Toot!"
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:09, archived)
# a new search engine? heaven forfend!
it won't seem the same if it's not a bottomless pit where quality art and jokes disappear never to be found again!!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:14, archived)
# How jolly!
Woo, just donated, now I have a happy heart :)
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:19, archived)
# how long ago?
mine still hasn't turned up :(

Edit: and I have been checking update your profile :P
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:27, archived)
# Just a few minutes ago
Have you gone into 'update your profile' on your profile page?
Edit: Ah... any suggestions anyone?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:28, archived)
# Go to 'update your profile'.
Scroll down to 'donation icon', make your choice, save.
Job's a good'un.

EDIT: But you already knew that.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:29, archived)
# happened last time too
och well.. I know I've donated anyway :P
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:34, archived)
# If you've not got it by tomorow Just send Rob a quick gaz...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:39, archived)
# I'll be too busy salting my porridge with tears
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:41, archived)
# Same here...
I also don't have a new icon after donating a pile of pocket change.

Let me guess - is your Paypal account at a different email address to your B3ta account?

Either that or Rob is just stashing all this cash to make a break for leaving the country...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:19, archived)
# I got mine pretty much instantly.
Email means fuck all, but did you make sure to select that you were donating under your account name?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:28, archived)
# Yes... I clicked that button...
Ah!! I notice the Hand Of Mod in here somewhere. As if by magic my icon changed...

All bow down to the Mighty Rob and his Mysterious Ways.

Notice - Mod, God, Rob. All three letter names. Maybe a connection.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:43, archived)
# BAJINGO!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:39, archived)
# Just keep checking....
Mine arrived later than some people that that got theirs when they donated after me..
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:34, archived)
# me neither :(
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:06, archived)
#
actually: yays!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:40, archived)
# Pfft...
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:21, archived)
# "Instigate it."
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:25, archived)
# hahaha
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:30, archived)
# Quite!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:32, archived)
# Hello!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:36, archived)
# Ahoy hoy!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:42, archived)
# The Instigategate scandle....
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:04, archived)
# Stephen Fry?
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:26, archived)
# Especially here.
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:34, archived)
# =]
Nicely
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:37, archived)
# "gloat"
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:45, archived)
# Nicely
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 16:54, archived)
# Got rich off the pickings!
(, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 17:05, archived)

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