right then, I'm going to commit suicide in 15 minutes

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:06, archived)

good luck!

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:06, archived)

you heartless BASTARD

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:07, archived)

remember, cut lengthways up the arm,
not across.
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:08, archived)

I might just have a sandwich instead

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:09, archived)

remember to cut top to bottom rather than left to right,
unless you get pre-sliced.
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:12, archived)

.
/pulls up a chair. waits.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:07, archived)

Have fun.

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:07, archived)

Tell Hitler he's a cunt
from me.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:07, archived)

oh gilgy, you remember what the padded cell looked like :(

( TonyUNDERSCORE from the Internet, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:07, archived)

webcam link?

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:07, archived)

Please don't.
The internet will miss you.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:08, archived)

stuff your head up your arse

(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:08, archived)

It'd probably fit in your hippo mouth.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:10, archived)

I'll miss you.
I think.
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:09, archived)

Up the street, not across the road.
Make sure the knot is good and tight now.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:10, archived)

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
+se
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:10, archived)

+The Teviot

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:11, archived)

This is because you've been sleeping with an 18-year-old, isn't it
and it's your 80th birthday tomorrow
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:10, archived)

dibs on your bumper book of insults

( The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:20, archived)

Speaking of b3ta in the news, this one was rather damning:
newsru.co.il/world/19jun2009/chat_001.html
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:00, archived)

They said WHAT about Rob's mother?!

( B.T., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:02, archived)

speaking of b3ta in the news, shut the fuck up

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:02, archived)

Oh,
hang on.
It's the same story in Russian.
Nevermind.
At least I'm getting attention.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:02, archived)

do something funny and stop being shit

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:03, archived)

at least they got the site classification right
if they were referring to /off-topic
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:02, archived)

It's like reading Joyce.
'When policemen have rushed into an apartment in Oxfordshire, the 23-years guy already was in a loop. Doctors speak, that if policemen were late all for some minutes, a life to the patient to rescue it would be impossible.

Before making an attempt suicides, the citizen of the Great Britain has left the message in a chat: " In 15 minutes, I shall commit suicide " after that it has left the Internet. At this time in a chat there was a girl from Australia. It has immediately communicated with the friend from Cambridgeshire, and that, in turn, has addressed in a local police.

Policemen needed some minutes to calculate the real address the Internet-user. The door it was opened by the younger sister of the suicide to whom nothing was known about the drama which has developed on the second floor, in a room of its brother.

Site Daily Mail informs, that the 23-years Englishman communicated with the girl on a site of acquaintances b3ta.com. '
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:03, archived)

that's what you get for using an online translator
it actually called b3ta a dating website - сайте знакомств
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:05, archived)

I can't speak Russian.
so i let the funky music do the talking (talking)
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:05, archived)

You mean it's not a dating website?

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:06, archived)

haha, its the best some people get :(

( TonyUNDERSCORE from the Internet, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:07, archived)

Were the orthorities ever called?
Did that chubby little cunt ever actually make good on his threat?
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:42, archived)

Are you a journalist for TV Quick or something?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:43, archived)

yes...
cause b3ta really needs more press attention right now
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:44, archived)

What press attention is it getting?

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:45, archived)

Rob's expenses were published.
They blacked out a lot, and there were claims he was racist.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:46, archived)

FINE I'll reply with my own chortle.
hahaha - 'zuki, yor so funnee.

It's just not the same. I may as well go and top meself.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:57, archived)

this
news.google.ca/news/more?pz=1&ned=ca&cf=all&ncl=dDrnPBop-G2tQKMhnYPX-UzsAPcmM
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:46, archived)

One story.
Woo.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:49, archived)

but
if there's only going to be one story, it's a pretty decent one
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:52, archived)

sounds like someone was trying a Bangkok stranglewank and it got out of hand
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1194117/Police-save-British-man-online-threat-kill-15-minutes--tip-woman-Australia.html
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:01, archived)

really? was that here?

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:51, archived)

yup
on off-topic, mostly...
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:52, archived)

Link?

(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:55, archived)

it's
been wiped
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:57, archived)

as the nurse said after visiting SSG

(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:00, archived)

oh my
well, hope the chap is alright
( MrA, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:55, archived)

unless it's piston

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:59, archived)

or sticky.
or that cunt Godzuki. He really is a twat.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:00, archived)

he was probably lying about being suicidal then

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:56, archived)

LAUGH AT MY QOTW JOKE YOU FUCKING CUNTS

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:03, archived)

disclaimer
i actually am employed by a newspaper, but strictly in the sports department. as what you lot would call a sub editor. and in the colonies (canada, to be precise). so my interest in this is purely unprofessional.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:50, archived)

most sub-editors I've dealt with can't sub for shit
are you the sub that runs a collection of desks, or the sub that fucks up everyone's copy with your retarded grasp for the flow of prose?
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:53, archived)

hahah
i'm the one that turns sub-literate drivel into something vaguely resembling english.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:54, archived)

TOOT TOOT
I'M A SUBMARINE
(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:56, archived)

I can imagine you're rather overworked
if that's for a sports desk.

(in-house language consultant for That Big News Agency)
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:56, archived)

the one
starting with r but now owned by t? or the one starting with a and HQd in new york?
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:58, archived)

The first one
the manufacturers of the tool in your RIMming story.
And yes, that T is shafting the R something rotten.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:00, archived)

t are tight-fisted cunts
stories abound of managers not doling out new pencils until stubs of the old ones were turned in. truly fucking abysmal.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:03, archived)

they've skipped that bit
and just planning to reduce the local office from 90 people to about 15.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:04, archived)

and
i also save pretentious twats from themselves. especially the ones who fancy themselves a new dostoyevsky when they're writing a 6-inch story on a footballer who got a boil on his arse and will thus be out of a match.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:57, archived)

Hello
yes I was, I told him he was a chubby cunt.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:44, archived)

bravo
well done. did he start to blubber?
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:44, archived)

I think so,
although it may have been sweat.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:45, archived)

I can imagine the report:
"I was online and a chubby cunt said he wanted to see my young sisters minge"

"Really? is she fit?"
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:45, archived)

you've got it all wrong
``i'm a chubby cunt, and some big mean bully said he wanted to see my young sister's minge''
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:48, archived)

"and she said no to me so i don't see why he should be allowed"

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:52, archived)

this whole chubby cunt thing pretty much played itself out and got boring within an hour

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:48, archived)

did it...
even become a 30-second meme?
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:51, archived)

sounds like my sex life.
a 30 second running joke.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:55, archived)

TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT AIRLINE FOOD

(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 18:00, archived)

What would you do,
If I sang out of tune?
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:12, archived)

SAMBA!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:13, archived)

Threadshit

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:15, archived)

*FLOUNCES*
I hate you, you're a cunt, and I want my bat and ball back.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:16, archived)

Make a documentary about your descent into drug abuse.

( The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:15, archived)

Get baldmonkey to find your name, address and let him make pervy phone calls to your sister

(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:15, archived)

OHH BALDMONKEY!
:(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:15, archived)

When baldmonkey gets his own sitcom, you shouting that should be the only thing in the laughtrack

(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:17, archived)

I'm going to get a walk-on role, then get the boom operator in a headlock.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:19, archived)

"OHH BALDMONKEY!"

(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:19, archived)

EXACTLY!
*Firm handshakes*
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:20, archived)

I'm going to TOKYO tonight, F.
The bar, not the city.
It's all going to kick off.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:21, archived)

Tsk! You only tell me your NIGHT'S PLANS whenever I'm away from Newcastle
I think it's on purpose.

Grr, and that.
(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:22, archived)

Indeed.
I'm such a terror.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:22, archived)

www.xtranormal.com/watch?e=20090105081243766
(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:24, archived)

That is brilliant, and so me.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:26, archived)

I'll
whore these again.
(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:21, archived)

I endorse these.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:24, archived)

I endorse JMG's endorsement of these.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:29, archived)

Especially as in this one it really does look like me:
www.b3tards.com/u/bad7436b035054876c55/emse_noit2.gif
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:30, archived)

You should put it in your profile or something i dunno [lol]

(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:32, archived)

All he has to do is ask.
I'll save him the effort.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:16, archived)

Wish that the Britains Got Talent judges had been more discerning

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:15, archived)

Probably sign you as a double act with Friz.

( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:15, archived)

Friz can't sing

(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:16, archived)

Eat a whole bar of dairy milk.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:16, archived)

ammals?

(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:17, archived)

Crown you X-Factor winner.

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:16, archived)

Who are these cunts that attend sporting events
who shout "GET IN THE HOLE" to every putt attempt in golf and "AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY" to every corner in football.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:17, archived)

My Dad

(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:17, archived)

When he goes ten pin bowling, he always does the "shoving" hand gesture when the ball edges near the gutter
It's a very odd technique
(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:18, archived)

Nothing
I'm not in your house
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:22, archived)

Fling shit at you




then lick you
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:27, archived)

Mess about with the mixer so the music was a bit louder ;)

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:40, archived)

sigh quietly
as the Great Karaoke Cancer ensnares another victim
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:42, archived)

super
murder
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:44, archived)

JMG.
What's the current JMG trends being used on here?
Or, what's your JMG gossip?
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:23, archived)

Do all the national newspapers have jobs advertised in them, JMG?

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:26, archived)

I have no idea. But I'd doubt it.
I don't read many newspapers, with the internet at hand most of the day and all.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

but on the internet you have to type in stuff or otherwise end up with a million options.
I'd like to just see what's out there.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

How would JMG know that?

( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

I need information about job hunting. I know who will be able to help
Mr DOLE
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:28, archived)

DOLE are shites.
13 weeks, and the most they've said to me has been "sign here"
That's what i get for being moved to a Lambeth Jobcentre.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:32, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqAypbgaUKM
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:35, archived)

i like that cat
despite being allergic.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:00, archived)

Mummy JMG must be trying to force him to get a job.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:28, archived)

What an elongated route to a tiresome internet gag.
:(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:29, archived)

I wasn't really asking you JMG,
I was just hoping that someone else would answer.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:31, archived)

Probably
Local papers are also a good look
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:28, archived)

I don't want to be anywhere near this county to be honest.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:31, archived)

Other local papers?
Look online or something
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:32, archived)

I shall.
I've only really been doing this for two days and I'm bored already.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:35, archived)

I know, appling for graduate schemes bore me to not want to do them
Tell us of a time when...
Tell us of a time when...

CUNTS!
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:36, archived)

I've already got some stuff in the pipeline,
I just want to know if there's something better for me out there. Plus I want to get out of my parents' house as quick as I can. Been here for less than a week and want to go.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:40, archived)

I move back on wednesday :(

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:41, archived)

me n the mrs live at mine.
it works well as ma buggers off worldwide often. She was pissed off last week as she couldn't get insurance to go to Libya. yes. Libya. Zuki's mum is 74.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:14, archived)

The worst thing is,
if you have a job (even if it's just to pay the bills) they suddenly lose all interest even if you've got everything else going for you.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:47, archived)

Im going for a PhD as I can't find a job

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:48, archived)

I'd have done the same.
Except I couldn't stand research, and besides no-one was interested, as I didn't have industrial experience.

Which I couldn't get because I didn't have any more the bare minimum in previous experience. *head in hands*
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:52, archived)

Well what I've hopefully got, interview went well,
is an EngD, which is like a PhD with industrial experience, means I get a foot in the door with industry and become Dr Nick. Bonus!

Also working in holland is always a plus aswell :D
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:54, archived)

baldmonkey drew a willy on the blackboard while you were out

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:26, archived)

I'm starting to think he's our new Wogan.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

Snitch.
You're getting digs at the gate at home time.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

awwwww!
I'll let you have a go on my sister then, call it quits
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:28, archived)

DEAL!

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:29, archived)

Her knickers are red and they have podka dots on:)

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:35, archived)

lololol

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:37, archived)

*vomits blood*

( moohalaa, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:45, archived)

OH FUCKING HELL

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:06, archived)

aaaand, I'm done.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:13, archived)

www.b3ta.com/questions/bullies/all
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:28, archived)

I've painted some ants to look like different animals and have opened a really tiny zoo.
You can hire a Micro Machines jeep to do a safari park drive round it.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITY!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

InvestmANT more like.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:29, archived)

Oh yer, AFC Energy shares are soaring.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:31, archived)

I got the night off tonight Jammy, but am doing a day-shift tomorow.
I might go for a curry with the lads, not sure yet, whenever I have that sort of thing, it fucks up my stomach for a few days, my insides are so "Hello Sailor".

Right, off for a coffee, l8rz g3z0r.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

Have you and SexFace been caught staring at the other in their Y-Fronts yet?

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:28, archived)

I wonder if anyone has ever used a y-front properly.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:59, archived)

JMG sleeps nude in an oxygen tent that he believes gives him sexual powers

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:49, archived)

Does anyone want to pick an online fight with me?
I'm incredibly bored.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:21, archived)

CUNT

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:21, archived)

YOUN ARE

(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:21, archived)

:(
No need to be mean
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:22, archived)

Sorry
you seem quite nice, really.

not very good at this fighting, apparently.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:24, archived)

Fight fight fight

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:28, archived)

No, just a good idea for a job to search for.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:22, archived)

you quote P. J. O'Rourke in your profile
he is an asshat. you are an asshat.
( rob, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:22, archived)

More donkeys should wear top hats.
And grow Abraham Lincoln beards.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:24, archived)

Still a funny fucker.
I prefer his earlier gonzo stuff, before he became all Republican lounge Lizard, but 'Give War A Chance' is still a brilliant read, personal politics aside.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:25, archived)

to be honest I haven't really got an opinion on him
but I've just read his wiki page and he's currently got anal cancer.
( rob, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:26, archived)

has he actually?
that would explain his permanent grimace. I always put that down to the proliferation of the hybrid car.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:28, archived)

No.
He has a canal answer. He knows lots about canals.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:28, archived)

I want to fuck Ryan Bury's thirteen year-old sister.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:23, archived)

not till I've had a go.
who's Ryan Bury? Not that it matters....
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:01, archived)

OH HAI TALK
Today I got paid £12.80 an hour to make candyfloss.

Did you do anything fun?
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

No
www.b3ta.com/talk/6241527
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

What a cunt

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

I know
She was really pretty too.

Oh well, I'm sure I can meet more people that I can patronise and alienate next weekend.
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

Is there a bash on?

(PsychoChomp, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

I hope not

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

A bash on
What Piston gets when he sees an offline girl
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

speaking of which
does anyone know if he has done his stand up routine yet?
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:09, archived)

Apparently he did
And his dad heckled him
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:13, archived)

thats got to be the lowest of the low
to be heckled by a family member
(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:21, archived)

Hahah YES

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)

YOU TWAT
I had caps on but I think it adds something to it
(PsychoChomp, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

Man regrets alcohol-related activities
IN OTHER NEWS

world still turns, bears still shit in the woods, pope's still catholic etc.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

I want to change ):

( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

don't bitch about it then
do it.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

quit bitching at me

( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

this is an intervention
nobody on the internet cares about your problems,

*hugs*

haha fuck that, if you are that devoid of human contact that you'll accept that as intimacy you need putting down.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:05, archived)

What was your username before?

( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:10, archived)

Elvis was right to shoot tvs
1 post in qotw about 3 years ago, gave up and signed up the other week.

what was yours?
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:13, archived)

Hermione

( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

Wormulus' still shit.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

We make a great team.

( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

Person puts someone else down on the internet....shocker.
Further investigation proves to find offline inadquacys, Comments on Page 27.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:20, archived)

You cunt...

( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 17:26, archived)

i made a tiny sailing boat for mice

( Lightguy hail satan, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

Has stuart little been sailing yet?

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:58, archived)

he set off half an hour ago
i'm going to give it another 15 minutes before i use the remote detonator to blow up the charges i placed in the hold
( Lightguy hail satan, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)

Good, I never liked that computer animated little twat anyway

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

Just did an eligbility form for a job.
Failed it :(
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

OH NOES!
Im waiting for my degree classification...
Then hopefully PhD follows :D
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

I'm waiting for mine to see the extent of the damage I did with my last two exams.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:05, archived)

I need this 2:1 :(

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:07, archived)

My predicted mark was right at the bottom of a 2:1.
I stopped applying for things I needed a 2:1 for after my exams.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:08, archived)

I was bottom 2:1 before exams
It basically rests on my dissertation
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:09, archived)

I know the rough mark for my dissertation and that went bloody awesome.
My last two exams were worth 20% of my degree and went bad :(
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:10, archived)

OH NOES GOOD LUCKS

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:11, archived)

I went to a summer fair and had some cakes.

( rosie posie tingly bongly, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

Dim sum later! yum yum yum.

( rosie posie tingly bongly, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

Did you eat them aswell?

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

Looked for our missing cat.
It turned out to be not him in the end.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

Is it your cat? that's missing
He'll come home eventually
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

is it black, white and about 10 feet long?
as if it is, then its just outside my house.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:10, archived)

That's a zebra crossing.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:49, archived)

Was it on a stick
or being put into bags?
( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)

On a stick
I was teaching kids the engineering involved in candyfloss making
So they'll come to sheffield and do chemical engineering
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:05, archived)

Oh, I thought you were a gypo

( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:07, archived)

No, im a recent graduate still unemployed

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:08, archived)

And you want to encourage others to join you?
Join the carni, live the dream.
( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:09, archived)

Yes, I may be doing a PhD, but depends on grades
I got paid to make candyfloss, that's the only reason I did it
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:10, archived)

candy floss is only good on sticks
bags are fucking rubbish
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:14, archived)

I ordered my ecksbawks and pre-ordered fight night round 4.
omg omg omg omg omg
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:07, archived)

AWESOMES LETS PLAY COD4 :D

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:09, archived)

I'm only buying it for fight night.
Did you know, Sugar Ray Robinson fought 1403 rounds of boxing.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:10, archived)

Oh :(
No I didnt.
Thanks for the useful trivia :)
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:12, archived)

Did you know, Tommy Morrison, who played Tommy Gunn in Rocky V, had to retire due to a positive HIV test?

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:15, archived)

No I did not

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:17, archived)

Did you know, Marvelous Marvin Hagler legally changed his name to Marvelous Marvin Hagler so newspapers would have to refer to him as marvelous?

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)

Marvelous Marvelous Mavin Hagler.....

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)

Did you know Roy Jones Junior was the first athlete to participate in paid basketball and boxing events on the same day?

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:21, archived)

How many facts do you have?

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:21, archived)

Did you know Rocky Marciano is one of the only heavyweight champions to have retired undefeated?

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:26, archived)

Do you have any mickey rourke facts?

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

Mickey Rourke was also undefeated.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:30, archived)

Who's on the bill for that?

( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:12, archived)

fightnight.easports.com/boxers.action?version=fightnightround4&id=Robinson_boxer
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:13, archived)

That looks quite good
I liked the other fight night I played
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:16, archived)

hallo
i went to ikea and now i am BUILDING stuff
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:14, archived)

BUILD BUILD BUILD

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:14, archived)

i want one of those fucking belts now
with tools in and shit
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:15, archived)

OH HAI HANDY ANDY
Can you build me a set of drawers made out of MDF?
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:17, archived)

put it on my list!
i've got a puter table, a swivel chair, a bookcase and a fucking coffee table to be cracking on with.

i may be a while :((((
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)

Ok, a spice rack then?

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:19, archived)

my car's still dirty ;)

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:20, archived)

Fiver and some tea...

( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:22, archived)

i'll wear you down

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:23, archived)

Fiver and some tea...
and that's my final offer
( epiphany coming live from sweden, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:23, archived)

Free beer. Free hog roast. Free ice cream.
You may point your envy rays in my magnanimous direction.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:43, archived)

hog roast eh
shagging a girl from Essex with your mate are you?
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:44, archived)

Thats got my envy rays roused.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)

It's not gay as long as we high five if we catch each other's eye.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)

as campbell says
were not high fiving, I just do not want to see your cum face.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

That's called an 'Eiffel Tower'
I believe.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)

I don't like Roast Ice Cream.
just doesn't seem right to me.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:44, archived)

its crackling

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:44, archived)

Free accomodation. Free food. Free internet. Free drink. Free bed.
/Visiting Parents blog
(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:45, archived)

bollocks, I bet you've got Panda cola and a spam sandwich

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:45, archived)

Dewd. Can you even buy panda pops any more?
I got some awesome blue fizzy pop at a festival the other year that was quite panda pops-ish but not real panda pops.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)

They sold Panda Pops at the pub I used to work in
I assume they still do
(__, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)

I think so
in really cheap corner shops.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)

I have a free headache, free cuts on my hands and face and as a special bonus
free upsetting my friends
and free ruining the Ruskin 09 Degree show.
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)

WINS

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:48, archived)

Have you been fighting over a girl again?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:48, archived)

Oh Jesus, I'm such a prick. I think I might use last night as a warning and try and reform myself a little.

( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:50, archived)

I got wankered in the space of 3 hours at the show, was systematically rude to everyone there
and started pornographically snogging someone in front of everyone else.

Then I went to the pub and managed to get into a fight and ran out onto the streets covered in my own blood thinking I was being chased

before getting the all night bus back to London from Oxford and sleeping in a mate's ex-squat in Brixton.
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)

I'm a walking cunt
I need to promise myself never to get pissed and be rude just for the sake of it.

I'll end up fucking up something really good if I carry on being such an epic spastic. I've spent all day trying to ring round and find out if everyone was ok.
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:54, archived)

I might go and bang my head against the wall for a bit
and then go to War of the Worlds.
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

you having some form of breakdown?
do I need popcorn?
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:58, archived)

I already had a meltdown on here once.
I except nobody remembers it though.
( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:05, archived)

was it the puddle muddle day?

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:07, archived)

haven't we all.
haven't we all..
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:27, archived)

free want to pay for a ZX spectrum and atari 2600 with lots and lots of stuff?

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:49, archived)

ok then

( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)

I want to sell it all as a job lot rather than split it all up.
Do you have a limit of how much you're willing to spend?
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:54, archived)

£30

( WormuIus, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

hopefully the speccy is not all bent on the keyboard
as I have seen some shagged beyond belief by the old golf ball on the keys trick to play daly thomsons decathalon.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)

it looks in fairly good nick.
I guess I'll have to set it up and see how it does first actually Seb (if he's reading)
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

Shit company though, if we're a better alternative.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:49, archived)

I've been baking for a tea party.
Rice crispy cakes, mini vicky sponges and cheese straws. Yum.

And I got a free pint of Guinness last night. Double yum.

And made £15 in tips on my first shift of my new job.
( LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:51, archived)

surely a mini victoria sponge is just a fairy cake.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)

Nope. I made them in halved tin cans then split them and sandwiched them.

( LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:54, archived)

£15?
thought fluffers got paid more than that.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:58, archived)

I had some nice cheese on toast
and I am off to see a lady later.

I'm practically Errol Flynn
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

Gay and dead?

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

ouch
zing!

bants.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)

I've just bought my son a happy meal because I am a fucking prick.
What about you?
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:03, archived)

I'm hoovering.

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:04, archived)

o
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:05, archived)

Fucking levitating cunt.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:05, archived)

Pfft

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:08, archived)

OH FUCKING HELL.
I'm addicted to Mafia Wars on facebook. FUCK. I'M SHIT.
It's so fucking pointless. It's just swapping numbers for numbers. Fucking hell. I fucking hate people like me.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:12, archived)

Procrastiplication
As proud as I should be for coining a new phrase, I'm going to admit that it's not as snazzy as I'd like, and doesn't have the easy wit to it that antidextrous does.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:23, archived)

Procraplication

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:55, archived)

you only hate it cos we are in the same mafia
you got a nice gun out of it!
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:29, archived)

I'm supposed to be packing
and sorting stuff to dump

I'm browsing the web instead.
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:06, archived)

Hello, haven't seen you in a while.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:08, archived)

Hiya
I'm in the process of moving house. Don't have the internet in the new house yet. So only come online when I'm back here sorting my stuff out for moving.

Have I missed anything?
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:10, archived)

No.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:13, archived)

shame
:(
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:16, archived)

I think someone said something funny yesterday but I might be thinking of another site.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:15, archived)

perhaps it was baldmonkey

( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:17, archived)

I doubt it.
he's an unfunny cunt.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:14, archived)

I bought him one because he wouldn't get in my car.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:13, archived)

im reporting you to the orthorities

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:13, archived)

lol
www.b3ta.com/talk/6240951
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:14, archived)

There was a sign in the pub garden I went to on Wednesday that said "playful children need watchful parents"
My suggestion to change it to "sexy children" didn't go down very well with my work colleagues.
( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:54, archived)

^^^
Understandable really
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:59, archived)

I've just finished writing a football article
Now I'm thinking about what egg based meal to have
( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:18, archived)

Eggs!

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:19, archived)

Eggy Cup
or french toast
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:19, archived)

Two EXCELLENT suggestions!

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:30, archived)

¦:¬(

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:31, archived)

What noooow...

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:36, archived)

I've just bought my girls, clothes
BECAUSE THEY WON'T STOP FUCKING GROWING!
( jenpots, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:38, archived)

Duct tape over their heads and around the soles of their feet.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:39, archived)

there are ways and means
but it does have the down side of the daily mail launching a hate campaign against you a few months later
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:40, archived)

Eldest girl child isn't quite 9 yet
and she's in 11-12 year old clothes. And it's fucking terrible trying to find little girl clothes for little girls. It's all fucking crop tops, short shorts, mini skirts and fucking boob tubes! I'm not fucking pimping my daughter!

/mother rant
( jenpots, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:43, archived)

^^^^ This
My daughter is 14, Mixed marriage, 1/2 Thai, the clothes she want's to wear make me angry as when we are out together I get accused of pedo shit. Grrrr
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:49, archived)

Yep
When I catch older boys looking at her, I give them the evil eye and mention loudly about her age.

When she does have boyfriends it really isn't her father they will need to watch out for.
( jenpots, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:53, archived)

Jen (My daughters name as well)
The guys she has introduced to me and those that have seen me are shit scared of me...(Except for one who has declared himself gay at the age of 14 as he thought that would save him from the manly glare of - "If you go near her I'll fucking kill you" look I give all suitors)
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:56, archived)

At least they don't call you a rapist though.
You terrible rapist.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:11, archived)

what is a terrible rapist?
one that consistently fails to get their end away, or one that gives you their number after?
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:16, archived)

I really have never understoon why they owuld make those sort of clothes for such young girls in the firstplace.
It's quite sick that someone would think up such designs in the first place.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:54, archived)

I blame Bratz

( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:59, archived)

It's because of role models innit.
If they see someone they like dressing like that, they'll then want to dress the same.
( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:26, archived)

sad thing is innocence it taken far too early
well, if I have anything to do with it it does.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:44, archived)

wot!
no pimp my ride?
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:35, archived)

make them take up smoking.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:17, archived)

you should be fucking well locked up you cunt

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:56, archived)

So should I!
Not telling what I did tonight!
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:58, archived)

I'm just going to assume you raped someone and call you a rapist whenever you post on here.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:02, archived)

Mike you are extemely perceptive
But, unfortunately wrong (on this occasion)
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:04, archived)

you would say that, you fucking RAPIST

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:06, archived)

I am having a full on genuine *LOL* at this
It was pretty tame really. I refused sex from a hooker
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:10, archived)

so you refused to pay a hooker then raped her?

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:10, archived)

This is horrible news.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:12, archived)

Something along these lines
Without the "refuse" and "rape"

Edit: Unfortunately there are quite a number of Hookers here, makes me a bit sad really as the majority of them are beautiful women who deserve better than the trap they have been caught within!
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:14, archived)

You paid a hooker then *blanked* her?
Can't see any word other than rape filling that blank.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:17, archived)

See edit above
And I did laugh
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:20, archived)

so she jumped you and took your wallet anyway?

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:17, archived)

I have a wife that takes care of the wallet
Pity about the jump part!
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:22, archived)

wait, you raped a police officer?
this just keeps getting worse
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:30, archived)

I heard it was rape, I don't know where I heard that rumour from though

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:04, archived)

Rapist.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:04, archived)

Serial prefx requires to be added

( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:06, archived)

You're such a disgusting rapist.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:09, archived)

I have been watching discovery shed
which inspired a pointless ebay session looking for power tools that i will never use but feel i need.
( chuff monkey I AM him, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:18, archived)

anyone else heard
Steve Jobs had a liver transplant.
([email protected], Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:45, archived)

I hadn't heard.
Was he a raging alcoholic then? Will the Apple Fan Boys be drinking bottles of Vodka in his honour from now on?
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:46, archived)

dunno
but i bet theres an app for that
([email protected], Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:47, archived)

is it a calculator
most of the apps seem to be a calculator with a fancy GUI
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:49, archived)

Tania Strecker

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:47, archived)

did she donate the liver?

( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:52, archived)

Daisy Haggard

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:56, archived)

...wait.
Is your username your email address?
( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)

No offence, I really don't mind if your opinion differs from me, but I really hope he's OK, and that he makes a full recovery.
I don't quite like all of hits products, but the iPhone/iPod Touch range are very good.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:55, archived)

I performed the surgery
There was a minor complication when the microscopic camera system we use, that is incidentally run on Vista, momentarily went down.

Even though he was anaesthetised i'm positive I heard Steve mumble "I told you so"
( applehead herp derp, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:57, archived)

It's on Wall Street Journal
online.wsj.com/article/SB124546193182433491.html
( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:50, archived)

TAXI TO HORSFORTH

( SickRik float like a camembert sting like a brie, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:40, archived)

I don't know where that is
But I'll happily drive you around looking for it and charge you for the privilege
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:41, archived)

My Union has asked me to go and protest against the BNP.
I have refused. I don't agree with the BNP but I do agree with their right to say as they please.

Whats your thoughts? Free speech for all even though it could be hate filled or censorship to hate groups?
( Cleisthenes morning sickness is a bitch, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:32, archived)

I believe in free speech providing it doesn't incite violence or anything that infringes someone else's human rights
then it needs to be restrained.
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:34, archived)

So censorship.

( Cleisthenes morning sickness is a bitch, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:35, archived)

sometimes it's necessary
but only in the cases I said above. The BNP can campaign peacefully as much as they like, but a repeat of the Nazi party would be unacceptable.
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:38, archived)

Thats what they are doing. Having a party to celebrate their MEPs
but they will apparently be protested against.
( Cleisthenes morning sickness is a bitch, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:41, archived)

Nothing wrong with that
People have a right to protest, provided it's peaceful.
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:42, archived)

By the same token, you or anyone else is free to protest against them
so long as they don't start being idiots and throwing eggs. There's also the risk that by protesting you draw more attention to them and give them more publicity.
( my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:37, archived)

Yeah, I thought on that too.
I do believe that protesting just adds more focus to them.
( Cleisthenes morning sickness is a bitch, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:40, archived)

The leader of the egg-throwing chaps went on channel 4 news that night,
and said he wanted to protest to prevent the BNP from getting any publicity. I don't think he'd thought it through.
( my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:45, archived)

I hate Eddie Jordan.
He's shitter than Pickle Fairy's views on poverty.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:49, archived)

Who's Eddie Jordan?
Is he like Tracy Jordan?
( The Neville What what what, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:53, archived)

You know how in Twins Danny DeVito got all the shit genes and Arnie got all the good ones?
Well Eddie Jordan is Michael Jordan's twin.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:56, archived)

Martin Brundle really Grinds my Gears.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:02, archived)

i'll get me coat.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:02, archived)

It's impossible to say a bad word about Brundle that isn't an idiotic statement.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:04, archived)

how about:
he's not as good looking as his girlfriend.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:16, archived)

I do so loathe the poor.
They should sort themselves out and getout of the poverty.

Mucky povs.
( Cleisthenes morning sickness is a bitch, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:33, archived)

I'm getting married 2 weeks today :o
Joking aside...I'm a touch nervous.
(Northern Lovely, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:05, archived)

congrats mate,
what're you nervous about?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:06, archived)

I'm from Yorkshire, I like beer and a good laugh
Now I have to wear a big frock in a posh country house and drink champagne. And behave in front of 60 relatives!!
(Northern Lovely, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:08, archived)

Oh dear lord you have to actually *behave*?
No wonder you're fucking nervous.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:09, archived)

Why do you fancy the maid of honour?

(PsychoChomp, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:06, archived)

cos she is fit

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:06, archived)

That would be too big a lifestyle change...I'm a lady!
I'm scared of tripping up in my dress/swearing by accident/getting gravy on myself. These are things I do often. Quite clumsy.
(Northern Lovely, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:07, archived)

Just spend the day before doing all those things, get it out your system
Pour sweary gravy on the walls and all that, like. You'll do fine!
( The Neville What what what, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:12, archived)

Haha, it's normally the waiter or waitress that gets gravy on the dress
When I was doing a wedding, our boss spilt gravy down a Vera Wang dress. Oops.
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:12, archived)

so try to practise now so it doesn't happen?
wear heels everywhere and have a swear jar for two weeks? not sure how to help otherwise - you sound like an older version of me - I'm horrendously clumsy
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:13, archived)

:) I am 26, I feel older though, I am horrendously clumsy and forgetful!
I have some absolutely gorgeous heels which I need to have a practice run in...the outside of the church is cobbled. I foresee a snapped ankle.
(Northern Lovely, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:15, archived)

ahah sounds like practise is definitely needed,
I know I'd break my ankle - my balance is horrible. Especially in heels. I don't wear heels for a reason.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:17, archived)

Get pissed, it'll be grand.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:06, archived)

run like the wind

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:07, archived)

*parp*

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:08, archived)

cheer up, no matter how nervous you feel now,
you can content yourself knowing it's nothing compared to the abject terror and blind panic you'll feel in 13 days time :)
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:08, archived)

Cheers luv :)

(Northern Lovely, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:09, archived)

He's cheating on you.
/someonehadtodoit
( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:08, archived)

I dunno how, he's my conjoined twin - he must be drugging me.
Thanks for the heads up ;)
(Northern Lovely, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:09, archived)

It's okay.
I'm a private detective.
( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:11, archived)

What music are you having for the event?
I'm trying to find something suitable for my sister's wedding in 2 weeks.
( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:09, archived)

try either German Death-Metal Techno
or something from the early Grunge Punk-Destructo phase, always goes down well with the elderly relatives
( The Neville What what what, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:11, archived)

During the (Catholic!) church service, Katherine Jenkins
During the evening do, a hopefully not *too* cheesy DJ, and a singer to keep the oldies happy. She has been told: no Celine Dion.
(Northern Lovely, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:14, archived)

They've got a band for the evening do
but for the service bit is where I'm struggling as I've got to have about 20 minutes of suitable "waiting for the bride" music, then some stuff for the register signing.
( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:16, archived)

It depends what vibe you want
I mean the Katherine Jenkins is actually lovely, but I've heard ska versions of religious and operatic songs at weddings that have gone down a treat. I find though that people get chatty during this time so the music is sort of talked over anyway.
(Northern Lovely, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:19, archived)

not sure if you're into folky/soul sounding kinda stuff,
but Eva Cassidy has some beautiful songs which might go down well.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:21, archived)

I actually wanted to go down the aisle to 'songbird' by Eva
but the Priest won't allow non-religious songs. So as a compromise we are allowed Ave Maria, my other favourite weepy song, as we sign the register. I wasn't allowed Fields of Gold anyway as it makes my dad cry!
(Northern Lovely, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:24, archived)

But it's YOUR wedding!
kick up a fuss! If you want to go down the aisle to Songbird, kick up an allmighty fuss. It's not as though she's talking about premarital sex- that whole song is about love!
/seethes
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:30, archived)

Having seen the difficulties my sister has been through in trying to get her and her fiance's wishes heard I think I'll just go abroad to get married. Either that or just not invite anyone and have a party in the evening but even that has caused some problems.
( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:33, archived)

It seems
there's always a lot of "Oh, but this is how it's traditionally done" sort of stuff

To which you should reply "Tradition shmadition. I'm having Songbird"
( The Neville What what what, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:13, archived)

If it was my wedding, I'd have "I will follow you into the dark" by Death Cab For Cutie.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYF8cUlbs3I
( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:21, archived)

I think I'll try and convince her to have Elbow's one day like this

( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:23, archived)

Huzzoons!
Congrats and all that. Mine isn't for a year or so, but I'm sure it'll still come rattling up on me quickly!
( The Neville What what what, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:10, archived)

Ahh, don't worry, nerves are common
Which is why we have champagne when somebody's doing makeup!
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:11, archived)

Is the board borked
or has everyone fucked off fishing?
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:35, archived)

Im sitting here
peeved that my throttle body pipe hasn't arrived
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:37, archived)

and slightly concerned that Facebook seems to be recommending people to me
that I know, but I have no idea how Facebook knows that I know them
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:41, archived)

people you know know them.
It keeps recommending i add Moohala
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:46, archived)

No, these are business clients
with whom I have no common friends at all. I'm wondering if Facebook is somehow reading my Gmail :(
IS NOTHING SACRED?
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:47, archived)

did you let it search your account for "people you may know that are already on facebook"?

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:49, archived)

I don't remember doing so
but I guess I must have done at some point. How frustrating. Fortunately I'm not the type of Facebooker who uses it as a dumping ground for all the photos of me drunk, semi-naked, posing in stupid locations or using procrastiplications
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:51, archived)

no...err.....me neither.
other people use it as a dumping ground for all the photos of me drunk, semi-naked, posing in stupid locations or using procrastiplications
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:56, archived)

haha.
'Procrastiplications', classic. *clicks*
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:56, archived)

I refuse to bow to its demands

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:48, archived)

My other half is having the same problem, and not impressed

( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:51, archived)

I'm here 'zuki
Spazzing back, I don't think I've missed much this morning.
( The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:39, archived)

hello Mrs HB
*waves*
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:47, archived)

Seems fine to me
FOOTBALL NEWS: Tevez is to leave United tinyurl.com/ngw8et
( executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:42, archived)

The general ugliness of manchester has just decreased by a smidgeon

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:46, archived)

It'll be a shame if he ends up at Man City

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:01, archived)

I've been up to the post office

( CowJam, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:48, archived)

Are you posting hate mail again?
Is it Kendal bound?
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:00, archived)

Well, I was about to do some cycling.
But it appears my bike has a puncture. This is SSG's fault, but I shall forgive him, pancreatic cancer and such, y'know how it is.
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:54, archived)

I think it's partially collapsed under the shitness of vampyrecat and hypnogogicmyoclonictwitch.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:55, archived)

Hiiiiiiii poppet.
good to see you too. Lots of love and fluff and all that jazz. :)
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:56, archived)

Hurray!
I like fishing.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:57, archived)

yeah? me too.
but I don't get a chance to go very often.
Do you fish often?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:58, archived)

A few times a week, sometimes more.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:59, archived)

Something smells fishy

( executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:02, archived)

Whatever do you mean!

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:03, archived)

I thought we agreed
that you would stop talking about your mum's mimsy?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:03, archived)

i bet its arseholes

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:05, archived)

/jealouses

(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 12:02, archived)

cheeky monkey
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 13:38, archived)

i didn't much care for that last forum thread
so i will wish you all a good day, i'm off fishing now, have a lovely saturday, i'll be back online tomorrow, all my love, never forget i love you all soooooo much, have fun, or not, no offence, love you

m
( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:34, archived)

i hope you blank, wanker

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:35, archived)

:((((((((

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:35, archived)

Have a good fishing day, mongy.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:36, archived)

Shit, have I missed someone getting worked up at the internet?

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:43, archived)

mongys NEVER upset at the internet

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:44, archived)

He seems to have bullied some internet hero.
What a horrible bully he is. I take back my good luck in regards to his fishing.
( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)

it was great online fishing
hooked a couple of good ones too.
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:48, archived)

ta very much, bivvy times

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:43, archived)

Bye Mongy
Have fun, I'll wave to you from London.
( Mrs Sp@m, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:36, archived)

thank you, if i had known you were in london today i would have changed my plans and guided you around this fair city
soz, love you

x
( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:37, archived)

I wish you good fortune in your pescatory endeavours.

( ArthurTheRat, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:36, archived)

I don't think that's the right word.

( ArthurTheRat, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:39, archived)

*disappointedly ticks a clipboard*
I'm afraid you're not the kind of person we require here at Proper University.

You'll have to do Carpet Technology at Nottingham Trent.
( moohalaa, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:59, archived)

cheers, i will kiss any catch for you

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:44, archived)

even a snotty bream?

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:45, archived)

fuck me no, they will get kicked off the line

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)

:D
BULLY.
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:48, archived)

What?

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:48, archived)

youve been quiet lately
what gives?
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:50, archived)

I'm sad.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:50, archived)

you need to go fishing

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:56, archived)

Fishing is for poofs and loners.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:56, archived)

I'm going later.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:59, archived)

haha
lovely lovely fishing
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:06, archived)

Thanks, mongy.
I'm going away for a few weeks today, but I'll think of you all from time to time and maybe remember some of the happy occasions we've shared.

Good luck with the fishing.
(MooCow_Byter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:37, archived)

i will miss your great forum post, have fun young man in whatever it is you are doing, unless you are going to prison, in that case repent, or not
love you

m
( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:38, archived)

what fishing are you capable of?
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:37, archived)

I think he may have caught you!

( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:39, archived)

he?
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:42, archived)

Good luck with the fishing.
I'm off to Royal Ascot again, this time for winners.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:38, archived)

thanks, enjoy the gee gees

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:45, archived)

lucky bastard
lovely lovely fishing.
send me pics!
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:39, archived)

will do, nice bivvy pics
great times
( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:40, archived)

special ones for rose
fankoooh
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:41, archived)

i bet all the solar powered carpers are out, puts me off to be honest

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:43, archived)

probs
a bit late this morning aint you? i would do my fucking gyppo rain dance for you, scare them off but the olds want me round for a bbq later soz
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:45, archived)

bit late yeah, it will be busy anyhoo, fuck it, i'll plot up and pub chuck the cunt anywheres

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:48, archived)

overnighter then?
found a couple of new lakes on my way back yesterday, just about to gooooogle
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:49, archived)

oh yes, i'll be out overnight, no day sessions for me

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:52, archived)

i'll gaz you links
check them when you get back innit
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:53, archived)

will do, ta ta

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:54, archived)

toodle pip

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:56, archived)

BIRTHDAY!

( SuperMatt, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:43, archived)

HAPPY CHRISTMAS

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:48, archived)

Allan Lamb's birthday is today.
Yeah, how'd you feel about that?
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:55, archived)

Fish your heart out mongy.
Something about tackle and bait.
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:51, archived)

smashing, cheers

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:53, archived)

Have a hooking good time, Mongy

( Major Turd for tonight only, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 11:07, archived)

pfft
who cares. cant even be fucked drawing a question mark?
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:20, archived)

this is dedicated to cunts.
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:21, archived)

yes you
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:21, archived)

Me?

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:26, archived)

but what about the rest of us? what will you do for us?

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:22, archived)

muppets. I'll squeak your wire but no more than that
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:23, archived)

im going to use that as a chat up line tonight
'I'll squeak your wire but no more than that'
(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:25, archived)

let them know the origin. I may have been there first (probably) during my SAS+ turbo training.
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:27, archived)

Hi Piston.

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:30, archived)

I am The Goat mofo
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:32, archived)

Nanny fucker?

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:34, archived)

do you remember when you threatened to beat me up, offline, great times

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:40, archived)

hahaha, no chance of that

( The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:59, archived)

Fine.
Tits with tits?
( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:25, archived)

It's just like I always say,

(MooCow_Byter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:25, archived)

Can somebody draw me some animals with tits?
I'm projecting my crippling loneliness, you see.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:53, archived)

yiff

( ArthurTheRat, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)

if one or if not all you new comers are not fanj i'll sell my bivvy

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:55, archived)

Ten bob
That's my best offer.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:55, archived)

I'm not 'fanj'
Will everyone stop fucking accusing me of being someone else? New people can be funny as well.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:56, archived)

'funny'

(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:56, archived)

no offence, but fanj is a legend, you should be glad to be compared to him

( mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:57, archived)

I'll take your word for it.
and use it to mop up my salty, salty tears.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:58, archived)

Get used to it, fanj

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:03, archived)

YOU get used to it
fanj
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:06, archived)

I'm rubber and you're fanj

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:07, archived)

I'll rubber your fanj in a minute

(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:08, archived)

If not animals,
Why not babies with tits?

or

GUNS WITH TITs.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:55, archived)

Fuck off.

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:07, archived)

Fuck on

(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:11, archived)

Fucking guns with tits.
Fuck off Fanj.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:14, archived)

I'm too tired for this
I am going to have a nap listening to adam and joe.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:19, archived)

I've got a girlfriend, me
She's got tits and what have you.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:55, archived)

muff?

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:55, archived)

One of them too
It's great
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:56, archived)

its great , kinda like a warm mitten only you cannae see your fingers.

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:00, archived)

use a fucking pen for christsake
nipples are sensitive.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:55, archived)

Earth Squirrels are Easy

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 9:59, archived)

Any preference?
I can do dolphins, bees or termites
( The Neville What what what, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:02, archived)

I wanted a snail
:(
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:03, archived)

Compromise
Ask for bees with shells
( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:04, archived)

It's not the same
and you know it
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:05, archived)

Oh, alright then
www.b3tards.com/u/7af363b76fba7b47653b/snailly_mctits.gif
( The Neville What what what, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:14, archived)

PHWOAR!
I wouldn't mind following her slime trail!
( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:15, archived)

Tears in my eye
Japs eye.
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:20, archived)

how about terry the termite playing the Theremin whilst he suffers with tourettes?

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:05, archived)

I drew you a lion with MASSIVE tits,
i39.tinypic.com/30roh86.jpg
(MooCow_Byter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:11, archived)

HOORAY!

(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:12, archived)

he is a happy lion :3

( ArthurTheRat, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:19, archived)

With tits like those,
how could he not be?
(MooCow_Byter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 10:24, archived)