EDIT: Am I the only one that when things like this flu and read anout the WHO. I imagine Pete Townsend going about trying to save the world in a magic bus?
EDIT EDIT: ONOES! Maddy's parents are doing a documentary! They must be missing the limelight.
EDIT EDIT EDIT: According to the news since the outcry from pig farmer the WHO are no longer going to call it swine flu it is now H1N1 Influenza A. Rolls off the tongue that one.
EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT: There are no more EDITs.
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:51,
archived)
H1nfluenza A for short?
(Joe Scaramangawith a G-double-O-D vibration,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:09,
archived)
Pig AIDS
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:10,
archived)
hahahahaha
Is that Good Aids or Bad Aids tho?
(Joe Scaramangawith a G-double-O-D vibration,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:20,
archived)
Good
It begets bacon:)
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:49,
archived)
life's been rather getting in the way of things of late
have had very little time for being puerile and i don't like it one little bit.
(god save the queenmaking another unremarkable comeback,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:12,
archived)
Haha nicely
(Maximinimusyou stick around I'll make it worth your while,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:54,
archived)
Also I hate my boss
Fucking lazy bastard moans because the huge project I'm working on is taking so long but keeps taking me off it to work on stupid little shitty projects that completely fuck over our system security. PCI compliant - maybe before he got his antiquated ideas in to it. I swear, if he had his way we’d still be coding in fucking M.
(Maximinimusyou stick around I'll make it worth your while,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:57,
archived)
You are Evilscary aicmfp
(The Great Architectis still waiting for his account to be deleted on,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:58,
archived)
*hands over a fiver*
Sorry, I really needed to vent.
Seriously though, because our client is a moron I have to change our secure payment system to display all the details of the payments being processed - to anyone able to access the system...
I suggested just throwing up an error message: "Error #14107 The problem exists between the keyboard and chair"
(Maximinimusyou stick around I'll make it worth your while,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:02,
archived)
(prodigy69broke b3ta and made everyone leave,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:02,
archived)
Who would get it in the neck if a load of customer credit card details got stolen?
Me, that's who because the payment system I made wouldn't be secure. We aren't talking about some little website but some of the biggest mail order companies in the UK.
(Maximinimusyou stick around I'll make it worth your while,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:05,
archived)
please redirect you grievance to someone who gives a fuck
you're lucky to have a fucking job. quit bitching and man up.
(prodigy69broke b3ta and made everyone leave,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:07,
archived)
To be fair, Prodge, I hate my job too.
I come on here and bitch about it sometimes.
(Captain Wowcurrently being a cunt in Infamous,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:12,
archived)
To be fair, I don't care...you're lucky to have it
(prodigy69broke b3ta and made everyone leave,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:20,
archived)
No, you don't care
but I think you're the only one that thinks anybody's expecting you to, or gives a shit whether you do or not.
(Captain Wowcurrently being a cunt in Infamous,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:24,
archived)
why the hell would I think anyones expecting me to give a shit or care if I do or not?
(prodigy69broke b3ta and made everyone leave,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:44,
archived)
Yeah. No one talk anymore. This isn't the right forum for words.
but if you're looking for little bitchy comments..you've come to the right place
(prodigy69broke b3ta and made everyone leave,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:22,
archived)
I will see many of them tomorrow
I am happy happy :D
Not about seeing the chavs, unless i see some who make me laugh
(Duke Otterbyyou pre-verts,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:57,
archived)
you are either going to watch darts or to the fair
(twigSave 6 Music,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:12,
archived)
Going in to Reading
(Duke Otterbyyou pre-verts,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:13,
archived)
oh I'm so sorry
(twigSave 6 Music,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:17,
archived)
Hahaha :) it isn't to bad
(Duke Otterbyyou pre-verts,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:18,
archived)
It was when I lived there
but that's nearly 7 years ago now
(twigSave 6 Music,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:26,
archived)
I just did a massive burp at work.
(Captain Wowcurrently being a cunt in Infamous,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:10,
archived)
Down the phone to a customer
that demanded to speak to a manager because they know the law and stuff?
(Maximinimusyou stick around I'll make it worth your while,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:20,
archived)
a- I'm the manager's manager now *hark at her*
b- no, I wasn't on the phone. I've got it on divert.
(Captain Wowcurrently being a cunt in Infamous,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:24,
archived)
You got promoted? :D
(Maximinimusyou stick around I'll make it worth your while,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:29,
archived)
Not exactly, but a side effect of my new job is that I'm now more senior
but they don't have to pay me any more *sigh*. Pay review's in August, and I want another £4000 at least or I'm out of here. I do a £40K job for less than half that.
(Captain Wowcurrently being a cunt in Infamous,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:31,
archived)
Fingers crossed for you
And I know the feeling, the guy sitting opposite me does excatly the same job for exactly double my pay
(Maximinimusyou stick around I'll make it worth your while,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:39,
archived)
Hahaha ning!
(Barbarossais not my real name,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:13,
archived)
(cs192is sucking on a Koala at,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:46,
archived)
Hello new person, and welcome aboard.
Suggested guidelines for animation size are no larger than 400k if possible. A quick link of that would be great if it's difficult to optimise. if you click the little L next to your username, there's lots of good info. there for you. Nice idea, btw :)
(The Great Architectis still waiting for his account to be deleted on,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:38,
archived)
FAIL dog smells fail (only filesize fail, I liked the video!) :) Welcome!
(op op op op opI stink therfore I spam,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:38,
archived)
^this
but the request that you read the faq when you register and again in the validation email have clearly been ignored.
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:41,
archived)
i'm going easyon the chap
because i posted a poem on the main board my first post! Can you imagine what happened? a onephilosophy bbq thats what!
(op op op op opI stink therfore I spam,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:44,
archived)
That is nought!
rob started to get annoyed that I kept emailling him to post the image I had done up that he sent a rather tart email explaining that I had to do it myself.:P But in those days there was no faq and b3ta took about 1-2 minutes to load up on a 52k modem.
EDIT: Oh managed to sort you out here for the bash.
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:46,
archived)
haha!!!
*emails rob with images from now on!!!!
(thanks for sorting me out matey)
(op op op op opI stink therfore I spam,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:50,
archived)
No probs.
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:52,
archived)
I bought a bridge camera a few weeks ago and still haven't had a decent chance to use it.
I was going to Donington last weekend, but thanks to the building work for the Formula 1 they haven't secured a racing licence for the year so the races were cancelled :(
(Maximinimusyou stick around I'll make it worth your while,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:16,
archived)
SIlly Maximinimus
There's no G in FIAT!:P
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:27,
archived)
Incidently there will be Fiats racing
As Fiat are the majority shareholders of Ferrari ;)
(Maximinimusyou stick around I'll make it worth your while,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:40,
archived)
cars have four wheels and go broom.
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:43,
archived)
Rain forecast not London on Sunday.
May have a barbie on Monday (possibly the wrong thread to use that terminology in though).
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:15,
archived)
let's go pardy
(Geoff the ClownfishYou know Myra, some people might think you're cute,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:16,
archived)
Is that like partying but with a cold?
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:18,
archived)
I'm not sure Monday's a day off for me...
which doesn't seem to make sense but appears to be true
Yes. Remove the head or destroy the brain. It's the only way to be sure.
woo. I feel really stupid coz I went out and got some Echinacea even though I don't really think anything's going to happen. I suppose I must in some way as I went out and bought it.
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:00,
archived)
As long as they don't shut everything down until the middle of next week I won't care.
it's like watching a bunch of toddlers when there's a spider in the room.
(Captain Wowcurrently being a cunt in Infamous,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:04,
archived)
Ineresting thing is there was a flu outbreak after the Second World War
that pretty much wiped out a huge percent of South East mainland Europe. One of the only people not to be effected were the poeple is spain working in the cinnimon factories. As they were working with it all day it was getting through the skin and had an active effect of fighting off the flu.
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:07,
archived)
Yeah but they'll come here before they come to you:P
I used to work for the NHS but got better:P
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:08,
archived)
there had better be zombies, or I'll be mighty disappointed...
and here's hoping for some G-Virus beasties too
that is some top vectorage! *click!*
(theoriginalsteve<this space intentionally left blank>,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:01,
archived)
I have taken to going round with a bikini clad bimbo
In the event of zombie attack it is a well documented fact that she'll get it first allowing me to escape with the fringe benefit of me wandering round with a bikini clad bimbo.
(riverghostservicing your mum since,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:25,
archived)
Ooooh
I just finished watching that new animated Resi E film last night. was very good /needs more zombies
(The Ear-TrumpetAddicting is NOT a word.,
Fri 1 May 2009, 11:21,
archived)
nice!
I'm watching "Cannibal Apocalypse" this weekend :)
(fegg..next to Mr Waddilove, stinking of shit.,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:14,
archived)
Worth it for the shotgun blast shot
And John saxon is always a sign of a quality movie
(Joe Scaramangawith a G-double-O-D vibration,
Fri 1 May 2009, 10:00,
archived)
Alone in the dark FTW! (original one)
Woo!
(op op op op opI stink therfore I spam,
Fri 1 May 2009, 9:40,
archived)
don't ask me why..... it's too early still....
(benkaiDoing nothing as of ...,
Fri 1 May 2009, 8:55,
archived)
arf! :)
(prodigy69broke b3ta and made everyone leave,
Fri 1 May 2009, 8:57,
archived)
"Mayday! Mayday! I wonder why they call it May Day? It's only a bank holiday! Why not Shrove Tuesday or Ascension Sunday? Ascension Sunday! Ascension Sunday! 15th Wednesday after Pentecost!"
(theoriginalsteve<this space intentionally left blank>,
Fri 1 May 2009, 8:24,
archived)
20 minutes of "well, it's too early to speculate..." "Yeah, but what if?" "well, it's too early to speculate..." "Yeah, but what if?" "well, it's too early to speculate..." "Yeah, but what if?" "well, it's too early to speculate..." "Yeah, but what if?" "well... it would be devastating" "There you go... Swine flu WILL be devastating"
(Joe Scaramangawith a G-double-O-D vibration,
Fri 1 May 2009, 8:19,
archived)
Perhaps, but if you look at what many of those gods eat you'll find they have no tastes.
Souls, uncooked still beating hearts and the occasional flamebroiled whole goat. Ambrosia might be the only thing in their diet that has any positive qualities at all.
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Fri 1 May 2009, 8:01,
archived)
(BargeArseMaker of fine Trouser Trumpets since 1863,
Fri 1 May 2009, 7:09,
archived)
Almost a full set this evening.
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Fri 1 May 2009, 7:12,
archived)
Right on!
I still love these pics of yours
(BargeArseMaker of fine Trouser Trumpets since 1863,
Fri 1 May 2009, 7:13,
archived)
Still have thousands of source pics selected/collected for those.
Pull a new one out every now and then for Compos and shit. I like doing full length (or short comics) more than one-shots. Even the three/four panel style seems rather thin in my mind. 'Epic style' is more what I like to do. Others may disagree there. It gets into the "words"/"TL:DR" area and all that. [/;-D
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Fri 1 May 2009, 7:26,
archived)
(Rapitinuiget in the cage and I'll give you a treat,
Fri 1 May 2009, 5:53,
archived)
He's also a fucking furry!!!
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Fri 1 May 2009, 6:02,
archived)
I myself was 'in the Tufty Club' when I was little.
(Meaning I was a member of the road safety-oriented Tufty Club, though, not that I fucked non-human creatures like Macca does, as this pic conclusively proves)
He's the page pump. That's how the interwebs work, like a series of pipes. Usually you cannot see the pumps working, but on b3ta, you get to look under the hood.
(PedroHinCome along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:44,
archived)
(gronkpan@vomitinglarry.bsky.social,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:46,
archived)
Masturbate into my shoes!
welcome to our website : www.cheap-nike-sneaker.com wholesale cheap Jordan shoes we always offer good products and best service for you Good quatity, Fastest shipment, Low price,No minimum order! We never mind starting business from minimum order even one pair. [MOD EDIT] banned...
than the fact that the wobbly girl pic is now too small...
Two wrongs don't make a right you know.
(Smoked OystersYes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!,
Fri 1 May 2009, 3:10,
archived)
Would you like me to linky it? I will if anyone asks.
People always seem to get upset when I post this, even though the meaty bit is just a model's pouty mouth and not, in fact, the inside of a lunatic's rectum.
If you look at the actual picture, there is nothing explicitly there. You're just implying it yourself.
It's people's own sordid, experienced minds that make them scream when they see this.
Simulated nastiness I can take, but I have to know that it's simulated for the effect to work. I'm not going to spend enough time looking at a goatse image to figure out that it's faked, and even then there is the question of why...
(Smoked OystersYes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!,
Fri 1 May 2009, 3:23,
archived)
All you saw was a pair of familiar, glistening hands making a gripping motion (totally innocuous in themselves) grafted on to a couple of other entirely innocuous images.
The pic itself is entirely implicit, and not at all explicit.
I wouldn't've posted it if I thought it was, cos I don't want to cause anyone trouble at work.
To be honest I couldn't give a rat's arse about the picture and I'm not working at the moment
but this idea of "hey I put something innocent in the picture so it's ok" really doesn't work - if I was in an office and someone ten feet away saw what looked like a picture of goatse on my screen, the HR manager really wouldn't be interested in my "no, it's actually a model's lips made to look like a stretched anus" argument.
NSFW means that if someone walked past your desk they would assume you're looking at porn/nastyness.
(gronkpan@vomitinglarry.bsky.social,
Fri 1 May 2009, 3:45,
archived)
I'M NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE HERE
(Rapitinuiget in the cage and I'll give you a treat,
Fri 1 May 2009, 3:46,
archived)
I GET TO DO WHAT I WANT BUT ALSO I DON'T GET PAID
(gronkpan@vomitinglarry.bsky.social,
Fri 1 May 2009, 3:50,
archived)
YOU COULD INVEST IN A WEBCAM MAYBE
I AM SURE YOU HAVE GOT WAHT IT TAKES TO BECOME A SUCCESSFUL INTERNET BUISNESS
(Rapitinuiget in the cage and I'll give you a treat,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:33,
archived)
I HAVE ONE BUILT INTO MY LAPTOP
I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER USED IT
(gronkpan@vomitinglarry.bsky.social,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:35,
archived)
No, no YOU haven't.
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:37,
archived)
It flips around and I keep it aiming away from me
so that view of a stack of cds must be a bit of a disappointment.
(gronkpan@vomitinglarry.bsky.social,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:45,
archived)
CAN I BORROW YOUR MARIAH CAREY CDS PLEASE GRONKPAN
I PROMISE I WILL CLEAN THEM BEFORE I GIVE THEM BACK
(Rapitinuiget in the cage and I'll give you a treat,
Fri 1 May 2009, 5:25,
archived)
The only people who would see that pic and associate it with a stretched arsehole
are people who've already seen goatse. So the damage was already done.
I must've posted that pic 3 or 4 times on the dayshift in the last 3 years or so, to a 'mixed' response - but never censorship.
Are we gonna have our b3tapics pulled because we're IMPLYING stuff?
Let's just say that if I set that picture as my desktop on my work pc, I'd get called into some kind of HR meeting to discuss appropriate behaviour in the workplace.
(gronkpan@vomitinglarry.bsky.social,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:09,
archived)
hahaha!
*Imagines the scenario*
Since you put it like that, I feel doubly honoured.
I've just laughed hard enough to hurt myself. I really don't know why this cracks me up. But he does appear to have some kind of respiratory problem.
(cowcatBituminous squeegee,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:31,
archived)
:)
This is the last one I made. They're numbered sequentially, so you can use the URL of the one I posted and just subtract 1 from the filename each time to see them all. Edit: yeah that's clear as fucking mud. What I mean is, rargle5.gif, rargle4.gif, etc.
(mofaha┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:35,
archived)
awwwwwwwwwwwwwww
I'd only seen number five out of those.
I think number two is the cutest
(Rapitinuiget in the cage and I'll give you a treat,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:42,
archived)
Ah, I remember those!
You've got an amazing mind. Keenly aware.
I'm afraid I'll be needing another one. I've used this one up doing stuff like this-
(cowcatBituminous squeegee,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:43,
archived)
He just got caught taking a dump in someone's shoe and is about to receive a stern talking to.
(gronkpan@vomitinglarry.bsky.social,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:43,
archived)
pulsating protein orbs do bad things
(PedroHinCome along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:23,
archived)
Hahaha
that's a bit disturbing :)
(mofaha┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:24,
archived)
(Tahkcalbω∞ for sigs,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:36,
archived)
AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
(gronkpan@vomitinglarry.bsky.social,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:34,
archived)
Yeah, that's about what I thought, or possibly
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
(mofaha┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ,
Fri 1 May 2009, 4:36,
archived)
a google search found that this was not such an original idea, but ...meh
edit: the idea was sparked by my boss, who sometimes applies her native germanic pronunciations into her english sentences. Today, she was telling about an unfortunate incident that didn't her her physically, but it hurt her eggo.
(PedroHinCome along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage,
Fri 1 May 2009, 1:40,
archived)
mmmm ego,smells like shit
(Rattleheadall time with the gay, forever touching,
Fri 1 May 2009, 1:44,
archived)
like a pig in
(wallynotherernot without protection,
Fri 1 May 2009, 1:56,
archived)
that piggy looks like *sooooo ahhhhhhhhhh* man
(discomeatsThis canoe,
Fri 1 May 2009, 2:01,
archived)
It's having a piss inbetween Halle Berry's baps.
(JeruWar and Piss,
Fri 1 May 2009, 2:05,
archived)
WELL WHO WOULDN'T, UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES
(Rapitinuiget in the cage and I'll give you a treat,
Fri 1 May 2009, 2:09,
archived)
Do you have that dream too?
I thought it was just me.
(wallynotherernot without protection,
Fri 1 May 2009, 2:12,
archived)
If fairness you'd have to be an idiot to trust the Daily Express.
Especially when it's underneath a story about French and Saunders....
Because that's really what I want to read about when the last ounce of my fever ridden body drifts away, not the works or Milton or Keates, French and fucking Saunders.
(JeruWar and Piss,
Fri 1 May 2009, 1:44,
archived)
:( I want more zombies
(PedroHinCome along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage,
Fri 1 May 2009, 1:39,
archived)
Are you making up news again because if so they'll be hell to pay.
(JeruWar and Piss,
Fri 1 May 2009, 1:46,
archived)
Hehe, nope
It's on Steam, a 24 hour free trial for everybody. Also something like 40% off the game this weekend in case you like it so much you want to play it for more than a day.
How does the installation thing work, not used steam before.
Can I download the file onto my pc and then shunt it over to my laptop which might actually stand a chance of playing the thing.
(JeruWar and Piss,
Fri 1 May 2009, 1:55,
archived)
Nah, you need to download the Steam program on the PC you want to play it on
Then inside the Steam program you can browse the games store (similar to iTunes I suppose), and it'll then download your game for you. As soon as it's done you launch the game from within Steam, and Steam is used for choosing multiplayer servers etc.