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I'd just like to say I hope none of you are having a bad time and I'm glad you're all alive
srsly
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:21, archived)
Why, did someone die?

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:21, archived)
more than likely, did you blow them up?

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:23, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/6282010
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:24, archived)
you got better?

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:25, archived)
maybe it's easty in a scarf

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:48, archived)
:)

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:22, archived)
what happened to the popular friz posts?

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:22, archived)
what popular friz posts?

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:23, archived)
on the populol page
were there earlier
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:24, archived)
popular friz posts?

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:23, archived)
ja
saying bad juju about frizzy :(
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:25, archived)
mr moon man has died?

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:26, archived)
WITCHCRAFT.

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:26, archived)
even witches have standards.

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:27, archived)
dunno, my feet smell like they died.

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:22, archived)
I was about to comment on how shit it is.
But I'm glad you've done that for me, G.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:22, archived)
your post just made me feel a little ill

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:23, archived)
I hope you don't die Frank... but not in a creepy zombie decomposing but never dead sort of way.

(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:23, archived)
Like Denis Norden?

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:23, archived)
Like Michael Jackson, oh no wait... he did die didn't he?
Seriously though, could anyone tell? Time of death... hmmmmm.
I bet it's all an insurance scam.
(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:26, archived)
funny thing is, that last pic of him with that tube down his throat
he did not look any different.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:27, archived)
This.

(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:28, archived)
Ah, but was it a throat?

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:28, archived)
true
maybe they just wheeled out a mask on a trolley with loads of pillows under the blankets.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:30, archived)
Thank you Giggly
I am alive and well, thanks for your concern you glorious human being you.
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:25, archived)
I'm very much alive thank you

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:31, archived)
well if anyone is feeling a bit down, just let me know and I'll go easy on you
without this information, it's a bit difficult knowing who I can insult though

there should be a page where we can register the fact that we're feeling slightly delicate and not up for a joke today, that'd be great
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:35, archived)
JOKE ME SENSELESS

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:37, archived)
*right in the jokehole*

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:40, archived)
JOKE HER UNTIL HER TITS FALL OFF AND ROLL DOWN THE STAIRS

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:42, archived)
I just heard the news, you naughty naughty man.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:41, archived)
there's more news than you could possibly imagine
stay tuned
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:47, archived)
Have I missed online internet drama?

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:49, archived)
Nice one G!
I'm watching cricket. How are you doing buddy?
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:42, archived)
They just had some gay birds on BBC2.
There were 4 of them living in captivity, all male, and two of them started attacking the others. Apparently this was because they'd formed a "pair bond" because there were no women around.
In all seriousness, couldn't they have just said they were gay?
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:12, archived)
I formed a pair bond
WITH YOUR DAD!
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:13, archived)
no... that was YOUR dad..

(likeajackhammer, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:14, archived)
while YOUR MUM watched
from the warderobe

sobbing
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:14, archived)
warderobe
warderober
warderoberer!
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:15, archived)
Yeah, warderoberer.
Eroberound around around around around.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:41, archived)
It's WAR... DEROBE

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:16, archived)
*removes clothes*

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:17, archived)
Now into ze shower block, schnell!!

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:20, archived)
I don't know who schnell is...
so I choose to ignore you and instead sit down and try and comb my pubes into some sort of hilarious form.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:22, archived)
Into horns with hair-gel, then you can sexily hang
your underwear on it for the ladies.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:23, archived)
yeah!

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:29, archived)
If you're daring, you could paint eyes on your old boy and call him your 'Little White Bull'.
No talk of milking time, mind.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:37, archived)
*derobes*
*causes men to vomit and children to cry, clutching their mothers dress hems*
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:18, archived)
I was going to do one of them stand there and be naked life drawing things, but I decided I'd get bored and it's not really a good place to meet women.
"so do you come here often?"
"SHUT UP WE'RE TRYING TO DRAW YOU, AND STOP SCRATCHING YOUR ARSE"
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:21, archived)
What is it good for?
Hanging up your chain mail
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:32, archived)
but you were bumming your own dad...
that'd make anyone cry
(likeajackhammer, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:19, archived)
I bet it was like meatspin

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:34, archived)
What are birds?

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:13, archived)
Grass is something you smoke.
Birds are something you shag.
Take your year in Provence and shove....it...up...your...arse.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:14, archived)
Aw man
I haven't listened to that for yonks. HELLO.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:18, archived)
HELLO LOVELY TINY GINGER LADY

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:35, archived)
HI THERE.
Oasis were great.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:46, archived)
We just don't know.

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:16, archived)
:D

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:18, archived)
Look at its legs

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:19, archived)
I know a man who can answer that question accurately.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:21, archived)
you don't know him like i do
i've met him and have his autograph
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:30, archived)
Thanks Blue Star.
Thlue Star.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:46, archived)
Baby birds are called bees.

(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:48, archived)
I've heard you eat bees.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:50, archived)
This bee stung itself by accident.
Silly bee.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:05, archived)
I have a new zekken
it says 'Gecko' on it in Japanese.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:13, archived)
Because it's BBC 2
If it was BBC 3 they'd be writing a sitcom about it now
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:16, archived)

writing giving monkeys crayons and paper in the hope of formulating a
(likeajackhammer, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:20, archived)
Two pints of shit and packet of shit.
It's shit.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:49, archived)
because it's an inaccurate anthropomorphism?

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:17, archived)
so's your face
but i don't go on about it
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:33, archived)
DON'T MOCK MY BREADFACE :(

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:40, archived)
It's a crummy facade.

(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:42, archived)
Is it though?
If they're shagging (and reading between the lines, they were), then they must be sexually attracted to one another, and they're of the same gender. Surely that makes them gay? Or, more accurately, homosexual, at least, if you want to remove any implications of a particular lifestyle that "gay" carries.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:45, archived)
your gay

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:52, archived)
that would be the problem with saying they were gay or homosexual, people would read between the lines and make assumptions
without knowing exactly what motivations are behind it. Pair bonding covers far more possibilities such as co-operation to protect territory or to improve social standing or boredom/frustration or liking a bit of cock. It also doesn't distinguish it from heterosexual relationships which may serve the same ends aside from procreation in other circumstances. It's suitably fuzzy I think.
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:59, archived)

this must be the longest thing you have ever written on here, it's kind of unnerving
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 15:20, archived)
they made soft furnishings out of twigs

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 14:01, archived)
Hello fitness fighters, internet hero JMG is here to brighten your day.
Would some of you like to summarize this morning's b3ta with one word?
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:51, archived)
Fat.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:52, archived)
I trust you've seen this.
www.oleole.com/media/main/podcasts/arsecast/ADE_BROCHURE.pdf

(Yes, I posted it earlier. Well done.)
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:53, archived)
Yes.
I was actually just looking at it on a different site.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:55, archived)
Will you be looking to buy him?

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:57, archived)
Yes.
Mainly based on the CLAMMY!
www.thespoiler.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/adebayorb5.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)
I like this,
I will consider clicking it.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:57, archived)
'Cauldroning*'

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:52, archived)
Hrrummpf

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:52, archived)
Pre watershed nudity has given its place up to JMG repeating himself?

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:52, archived)
Can everybody PLEASE reply to MoT's thread below so he can feel more confident.
Thank you.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:56, archived)
I think cr3 should make a bot called JMG + 1 that just posts what you posted an hour ago again.
It'd save you a lot of effort.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)
I thought you were the bot that follows me around and disagrees ever so slightly.
Some may be mistaken as to think that's all you do on here.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:01, archived)
only you would JMG,
as you're so understandably blinded by your own brilliance that you can only focus on posts that include the acroynm JMG or ones that are in reply to your own.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:03, archived)
Well.
Take me out of this place and there's nothing else to discuss.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:06, archived)
Right now on the internet
there are attractive naked ladies shoving large vegetables up themselves, ponygirls, women having intimate relations with horses, men being taken with strap-ons, cartoon dogs having gay sex, pictures of the face of almost any attractive celebrity you could name photoshopped into hard-core porn, people shagging teddies, impressionable teenagers stripping off on webcam, pensioner orgies and amputees pretending to be raped by angry midgets.

The internet's taken all the fun out of the watershed.
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:00, archived)
My generation is probably the most jaded in terms of nudity.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:00, archived)
young people are green when naked?
BLIMEY
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:02, archived)
yes
when I was a lad the closest I got to pornography was finding a copy of the Sunday Sport in the woods
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:08, archived)
they were always in the woods, weren't they
who were the woodland porn distributers?
(I helped save b3ta! Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:09, archived)
I blame squirrels

(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:12, archived)
Not really.
There's still the novelty of it being on TV rather than the computer.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:01, archived)
isn't the watershed.com a 'watersports' website in a fully lined outdoor toolstore?

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:02, archived)
Keep going....

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:04, archived)
I imagine your pants are not unlike someone chucking a shovelful of mentoes into a barrel of coca cola

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:17, archived)
Ha ha ha ha ha

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:18, archived)
And the rest
That's just your bookmarks folder.
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:21, archived)
Unremarkable

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:53, archived)
Noeggsinthefridge :(

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:53, archived)
bulbospongiosus

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:53, archived)
Undescribable

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:53, archived)
I've just come back from they hygeenist.
I've decided that when I win the lotto, I'm getting a dentist's chair.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:53, archived)
Sleepy

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:53, archived)
Dunno
I am poorly. My eldest daughter gave me her virus. Horrid girl.
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:54, archived)
hygeenist

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:54, archived)
cambered

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:54, archived)
*FIVE!*

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:56, archived)
*leans slightly*
*FIVES*
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:58, archived)
Ifounda£20noteonthebus

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:55, archived)
winnar!

(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:55, archived)
GREATFORTUNE!

(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:56, archived)
dolerage

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:56, archived)
FRUIT WITH LOOT!

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:57, archived)
git
you made me do a 'LOL'
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:03, archived)
It's going on male-oriented skin technlology enhancers with patented ingredients™

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:12, archived)
30,000TH POST
AND IT WAS REPLYING TO MOOEY.


(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:57, archived)
well done DG. lets all mander to you
or call you a cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:07, archived)
*red hot guitar solo with fireworks*

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:10, archived)
daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayum

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)
(|:8(/) $$

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:15, archived)
Monosyllabic

(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:55, archived)
ym

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:55, archived)
spasmojesticles

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)
this

(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:01, archived)
Brilliant, you truly are fantastic.
How are you buddy?
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:02, archived)
BETTER THAN YOU, MISTER 70,000+ SHITCUNT

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:04, archived)
NEWER PEOPLE ARE SHITTER.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:06, archived)
PROVE ME WRONG JMG, PROVE ME WRONG

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:07, archived)
I really can't.
:(

I'm struggling to find anybody NEW and GOOD.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:10, archived)
Right here.
I'm awesome.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:39, archived)
It was pretty drab, but then I livened things up, all by myself.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:02, archived)
Thrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrnnnnnkkkkk.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:05, archived)
On channel 4 right now there is a very attractive lady fully naked,
tits and nipples and everything, nothing's censored.

Who wants to complain to Ofcom with me?
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:48, archived)
Is she leaving offensive messages on the answering machine of a national treasure?

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:48, archived)
THEY'RE INSULTING GMoS?!

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:49, archived)
I slept with his future granddaughter.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:52, archived)
That's what the FAT do, MoT.
The FAT and the OVERLY SENSITIVE.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:49, archived)
It's a program about painting nude portraits.
All the show seems to be is the camera pointing at the lady and people talking.

I'm enjoying this muchly.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:49, archived)
I liked watching glastonberry on the tv
when camera men were frantically zooming out after being cut to while focused on boobs or bums
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:51, archived)
Fuck off!
Complaining would stop this sort of thing, do you like willies or something?!?!
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:49, archived)
The internet is being too serious right now :(

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:50, archived)
I wasn't being serious you 'nana :)
I know you like willies silly :)
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:53, archived)
Is Judy Finnegan doing a good bye cootchshow?

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:50, archived)
Not to insult Judy,
but I did say "very attractive"
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:50, archived)
"when, oh when, will channel 4 wake up and realise that we don't want to see naked people before 9pm"
yours, Angry of Tonbridge
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:50, archived)
Isn't channel 4 just babestation now?

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:50, archived)
I like tits & nipples and everything
however I don't have time to turn the telly on as I have to go to work :(
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:52, archived)
Never mind that, real ale is the best drink, after tea.
In other news, have any of you lot ever tried to use a cable like this to plug a tape player/record player into a computer? From what I can see, these are used more for speakers. A chap at work wants to record old vinyl, and packs cost from £10 to £30, it seems just for a cable and Audacity (which is free anyway).

If you haven't, or don't care, then can I have a cup of tea please?edit: Thanks for you help!
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:39, archived)
I like a good quality orange juice with bits in more than tea,
and I like tea more than I like real ale.

Actually no, tea comes first.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:40, archived)
no
eff off
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:40, archived)
I'd suggest a better solution is to bung a proper audio soundcard into your computer
can get M-Audio soundcards for bugger all these days
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:40, archived)
My colleague has a laptop though. Normal mic inputs are shitty mono ones,
as you've probably guessed that's why I'm looking at USB ones.
I was hoping they'd be automatically recognised as an audio input by Windows without the need for software, and that someone here might know.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:43, archived)
You sure the mic input is mono?
Seems unusual, should just be able to get a twin phono to single stereo mini jack & use that. Will be shit quality through a generic laptop soundcard tho.
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:47, archived)
this
it's usually a stereo line in
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:48, archived)
What about an external sound card
www.amazon.co.uk/TRUST-SC-5500P-EXTERNAL-SURROUND-SOUND/dp/B0002Z2QQY

shitty but would probably do the job - he can always get some software to clean up the vinyl later
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:47, archived)
no
and no.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:40, archived)
The best drink is the pink stuff that dentist's have.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
It reminds me of red After shock

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:42, archived)
it starts off white,
when you spit it down the sink it washes all the blood from your broken diseased gums, and this slowly accumulates as they pour it back into the bottle
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:42, archived)
The limitation is probably what rate the computer can capture and A/D convert.

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
does the cable not have some kind of magic box in the middle of it?

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
It may do. Some of the ones I've seen have.
I'm hoping so.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:43, archived)
it also looks like it may plug into a mobile phone
what with the 3 connections
(likeajackhammer, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:42, archived)
I use a mini jack splitter going into Phono leads at work when putting old archive stuff onto my PC. Just 1:1 record it at x1 speed

The USB thingy might need drivers that aren't about.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:43, archived)
SHUT UP!

(likeajackhammer, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:44, archived)
My birthday is better than yours

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:45, archived)
That's what I thought, but it's an old laptop he's using with no phono inputs
and a mono mic input. It's just getting the stereo signal into the thing that's the problem.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:45, archived)
So is mine at work.
mini jack goes into the 'Audio In' jack in the PC.
Phono leads go into the record/cassette player. sorted.

If he's only got a mono mic jack in then tell him his laptop is uber shit and stop trying to be clever.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:47, archived)
*stereo mini jack to twin phono fives*

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:49, archived)
booya!

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:49, archived)
word

(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:51, archived)
I'm pretty indifferent to hot drinks.
I do hope you don't mind.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:45, archived)
Bloody real Ale drinkers.

(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:49, archived)
Get a usb turntable.
They are ace.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:50, archived)
I'd like to just borrow one of these
I'd have no use for it once I'd recorded my vinyl
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:53, archived)
Assuming you already have a record deck
It's cheaper to stick an Audiophile 2496 into your pc & record from your current record deck. Tidy the files up in the audio editor of your choice, job done, your computer has a decent soundcard in & almost certainly better quality rips than from a USB turntable.
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:58, archived)
Yeah true
I've been recording straight from the rec output of my mixers into a Soundblaster Audigy 2 Gold then using Audio Cleaning Lab to normalise the tracks. By the time the mixes are on CD they sound pretty decent, certainly good enough for what I want them for
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 13:06, archived)
Hello internet.
I'm watching Maury. It's about fat kids. I'm finding myself getting enraged about these fat little bleeders and their parents. AND I'M NOT EVEN A PARENT MYSELF.

I went to see Oasis last night. I really enjoyed myself, and got a bit teary when Noel sang 'Half The World Away'. It was full of townie cunts. There was no honey. The end.

How are you? I have TEA. YES.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:35, archived)
I had tea yesterday.
Yorkshire tea, it's red!
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:36, archived)
Yorkshire Tea is pretty kick ass.

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:39, archived)
First tea I've had in years
Other than peppermint or ginger tea. It wasn't bad. Huge mug, 1 sweetener and no milk.
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
I've not had ginger tea,
even though I am actually Ginger T.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:44, archived)
Fat kids make me :(
The worst ones are the really young kids of no more than five or six, and they already have rolls of fat on their arms.
(I helped save b3ta! Bats, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:36, archived)
Hehe
Bet you got soaked at the Ricoh Arena. What did you think of the stadium? Its the home of my football team so start speaking up.
(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:37, archived)
THEY ARE MY TEAM ALSO.
I was sitting. I got drenched at Take That though. It didn't actually rain that much last night.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:37, archived)

that much last night
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:39, archived)
*clears throat*
"Let's all sing together,
Play up Sky Blues,
While we sing together,
We will never lose.
Tottenham or Chelsea,
United or anyone,
They shan't defeat us,
We'll fight till the game is won."

Songwriter - Jimmy Hill.
(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:39, archived)
Fucking hell
that's the worst football song I've ever seen.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
Especially now because all the teams mentioned in that song DID beat Coventry and they've been relegated from the top flight of english football

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:42, archived)
Rub it in please.

(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:44, archived)
I just thought it would automatically get drowned out
by a rousing chorus of "you're shit, and you know you are"

from the match officials
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:44, archived)
Reading FC have worse.
One of their songs just seemed to be random clapping and a grunt.
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:44, archived)
It's the local dialect
it means "we wish we were from London".
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:45, archived)
that's like the Italian national anthem

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:46, archived)
YAY.
In our Coventry homes
In our Coventry homes
We speak with an accent exceedingly rare
If you want a cathedral we've got one to spare
In our Coventry homes
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
In your Villa slums..
You find a dead dog and you think its a treat..
(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:45, archived)
Blur > Oasis
They were amazing at Glastonbury.
(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:37, archived)
To that I say
opinion lolz. I didn't actually say who were better than who. They did look good at Glasto, I must say. I saw them there aaaages ago.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:39, archived)
I concur.
Think Tank = Best album.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:39, archived)
Modern Life is Rubbish > Think Tank
More opinion lols.
(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
I love Modern Life Is Rubbish

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:42, archived)
I'm 100% NOT having a sly wank under my desk... NO-SIR-EE!

(likeajackhammer, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:37, archived)
foad

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:37, archived)
That's not very nice now is it?

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:38, archived)
I'm not a very nice person

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:39, archived)
Fuckin' tea? FUCKIN' TEA?!
Good choice of beverage.
:)
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:37, archived)
I felt sorry for this woman at the tube station yesterday who had to take a waddle-up towards the barriers to fit through. It was like she was rugby tackling the Oyster reader
I've seeing them at V Festival this year. Not that bothered by them though.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:38, archived)
Fat kids do annoy me. Still, they'll hopefully die of fat related diseases early and ease the burden of elderly care.
I always think that Oasis were good song writers, but their production values and singing let them down.

I'm fine.
(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:38, archived)
Noel is a better singer than Liam, imo

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:42, archived)
I concurr
Liam should never have been in the band.
(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:43, archived)
They were his band.
Noel joined them. I don't think they could've kicked him out without one of them getting beaten to a bloody pulp.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:45, archived)
Ahh.
I didn't know that.
Even so I stand by my assertion that they would be better off without him.
(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:49, archived)
hmm a lovely cup of tea would go down a treat right now
however I only have the option of vending machine tea today, which is utterly revolting
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:40, archived)
Given that tea is about 99p for 40 teabags
and you can buy a kettle from Tesco for about 4 quid,

you are clearly not trying hard enough.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:43, archived)
MISSUS! WILL YA! MAKE ME TEA! MAKE LOVE TO ME! PUT ON THE TELLY....
TO THE BBC!
(likeajackhammer, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:40, archived)
I once had to listen to that almost non-stop on a run to Manchester.
THANKS A WHOLE FUCKING BUNCH, MYSTERY BOB.
(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:43, archived)
I saw Oasis at Coventry last night too.
They were very good, and better than us.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
Ha ha.
You were good. Not as good as us.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:41, archived)
Britian's best pub band.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:42, archived)
Well quite.

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:43, archived)
That was shit.
Cricket or something?
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:34, archived)
Did we lose?

(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:36, archived)
FLAP FLAP FLAP.
Fuck off shitcunt.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:38, archived)
Heineken Export hands down is greatness
I will fight any Peroni drinkers out there to the death.
PS - Real Ale drinkers please back off. I wish I had the buds for the real Ye Olde Ale but I dont so fuck off.
(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:19, archived)
Lager is lager.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:20, archived)
and why do you wish you had the taste buds to enjoy something you don't enjoy?
That's fucking retarded. You like what you like, that's why you like it.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:24, archived)
I love the look of Olives and wish I loved them
But Olives hate me and I hate them.
(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:26, archived)
I wanted to rip her glasses off her face & do her from behind
we are talking about Olive from On The Buses, right?
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:27, archived)
You need to push past the 'Eeeew I don't like them' to the point where you are physically craving them.
Like cigarettes.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:28, archived)
La laaaa la la la
♫
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:28, archived)
I'll see your Heineken
and raise you some Super Bock.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:20, archived)
*Erdinger's*

(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:20, archived)
Good if you like weissbier
bad if, like me, it makes you sick.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:24, archived)
Try a Kristalweiss then, it's filtered and often allieivates that feeling.

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:27, archived)
I did, Franziskaner do a good one
but I'd still stick to other brews myself.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:28, archived)
Oh well.
The lightest one I can think of is Weihenstephan Kristal, but if it's not for you, it's not for you.
(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:30, archived)
Cheers for trying
I'm just one of those awkward bastards that has tried most alcoholic drinks going.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:34, archived)
That stuff is nice but makes me uber pissed double quick with a killer hangover
Cool glasses though :)
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:25, archived)
I relocated some Erdinger glasses from a local pub
they were a fucker to clean
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:27, archived)
Did you try soapy water rather than puddles?

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:29, archived)
Oh yeah, it's rocket-fuel alright, but it makes me happy.
And the glasses are funky.
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:32, archived)
Hmmm.
Its about 6% isnt it? I have looked at this for a while.
(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:22, archived)
5.6%
it's very nice beer, and no more wifebeaty than Stella really.

I need to get out more
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:23, archived)
Will give it a try.

(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:27, archived)
Meh. Not that great. too hoppy.
I like a nice Budvar Budweiser.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:20, archived)
Yes. Brilliant on a hot day :)
Or Staropramen.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:27, archived)
Stara turns me into 'Windmill Man'

:S
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:32, archived)
Keep your flies done up next time

(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:39, archived)
Its nicer than USA bud.

(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:27, archived)
You don't have tastebuds for much, if you think heineken's the best.

(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:20, archived)
Fight me now.

(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:22, archived)
I'm female, and I drink real ale.
How about you fight me, lager-wimp?
(I helped save b3ta! Bats, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:24, archived)
This^
If we get Wicca involved we can be can be the Power Puff Girls of Real Ale.
(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:26, archived)
RAARRRR

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:28, archived)
I want to be Bubbles!
You can be Blossom, and Wicca *has* to be Buttercup.
(I helped save b3ta! Bats, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:29, archived)
Well okay but Azra3l thinks I would definitely be Bubbles.
Blossom is okay with me though.
(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:31, archived)
I want to be a powerpuff girl :'(

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:33, archived)
Let's face it, you're more of a Mojo Jojo

(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:34, archived)
Ahhh ok. As long as you all beat me up with your chebbs out I don't mind.

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:37, archived)
I actually have a bottle of bubbles in my handbag.
The bottle is a translucent blue. But, I can be Blossom, if you want.
(I helped save b3ta! Bats, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:33, archived)
Nah Blossom is good with me.
It sounds like you win on the Bubbles front.
(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:36, archived)
I can't get that damned theme tune out of my head now :(

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:29, archived)
In that case
me, Az and Spider can be the Mighty Morphing Power Drinkers.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:33, archived)
Godamn I will fight you all.
But first please let me refresh myself with some Heineken greatness.
(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:30, archived)
*high kicks the can out of your hand*

(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:31, archived)
*Looks around room with bleary eyes*
*Goes back to the bar*
(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:34, archived)
*Powerpuff Girls Z transformation*
HAINAKEN わビールがありませんよ！　アルにかわっておしおきよ！
(I helped save b3ta! Bats, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:36, archived)
*Stabs you in the eye*
*Walks away undefeated*
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:24, archived)
Fair do's.

(Fluffster, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:35, archived)
You are either a chav or a girl.
AICMFP
(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:21, archived)
Fuck off and die.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:21, archived)
Naughty vicar.

(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:23, archived)
Bless you.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:28, archived)

haha, I just heard someone trumpeting the Neighbours theme tune in the background a minute ago
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:21, archived)
old theme, new theme. sad theme
actually home and away?
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:22, archived)

nono it was definitely neigbours, because it went dooo-dooo, do-do-do-do-do-do-dooooo-do
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:23, archived)
Made me tingle.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:22, archived)
Thats what you get for living next door to Mr Methane

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:24, archived)

the best thing is I can shout requests through the wall
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:25, archived)
Get some Doombar in you, you fucking fanny.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:21, archived)
This.
Or Tribute. Fine beer, that.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:24, archived)
An equally good call.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:30, archived)
The beer hierarchy is
Heffeweizen - brilliant
Dunkles - pretty good
Bock and Doppel Bock - hard hitting and tasty
Helles - alright
Pils - god, no
Lager- fuck off
(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:21, archived)
None of these problems with cider
that's why
Real Men Drink Cider™
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:23, archived)
Hahahahahaha
I know this is b3ta, but really, let be serious for a moment - Cider is okay, but it's no beer.

I'll consider ciders on a case by case basis.
(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:24, archived)
No,
14 year old chavs at the park drink cider.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:25, archived)
No, that's alcoholic apple flavoured fizzy drink.
Real cider is real nice and for real people.
(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:29, archived)

chavs connoisseurs of a fine drink much berated by snobby virgins
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:30, archived)
Ha ha.
MoT is a snobby virgin.
(I helped save b3ta! TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:33, archived)
Surely at 14 they should all be virgins, by law?

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:36, archived)
It was the cider drinkers who were 14, not the snobby virgins

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:37, archived)
Ahh, got you

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:40, archived)

cider

cocktails
(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:29, archived)
Old Rosie for the win.

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:30, archived)
I'm with you on that one, tis a fine drink
the only Westons one I can find over here is the organic one, it's ok but not really in the same league
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:34, archived)
Ha ha, yeah

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:21, archived)
Lager tastes of fizzy water.
It's only acceptable for home drinking when funding is limited.
(I helped save b3ta! Bats, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:21, archived)
Or it can be mixed with cider and blackcurrant
Diesel, mmmm
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:34, archived)
Most 'session lagers' taste the same, with the exception of Carling and Fosters which don't taste of anything.
And by taste, I mean that the tiny little bubbles tingle on your tongue, much the same way that a four year old is excited by popping candy. A stupid four year old. Who hasn't worked out what his tongue is for.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:23, archived)
Sorry, if I'm going to drink lager at all, I prefer to drink something that doesn't taste of cat's piss.

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:26, archived)
I don't drink alcohol really.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:31, archived)
I'm babysitting right now.
This may well all end in tears.
What is your prediction?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:43, archived)
An end to life on earth by tea time.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:45, archived)
Middle or working class tea time?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:46, archived)
Cricket tea time
at this rate
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:55, archived)
'Ello.
Gone on a work-related stabby rampage yet?
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:56, archived)
Even better
I quit two weeks ago, I'm off to sign on later. Bit fucked off, I actually lost money doing that shitty fucking waste of time masquerading as employment.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:57, archived)
Meh.
Better to be jobless than doing that shite ultimately.
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:58, archived)
True that
I've just spent my last pay on some beer to drink while listening to the cricket.
Beats the hell out of what I was doing two weeks ago.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:00, archived)
Bopara to make a ton.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:45, archived)
PHWOAR CRICKET.
I fully endorse the Bopara ton cause. By the way, it's being played just around the corner from my house. I shall be attending day 3.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:46, archived)
Get in!
My Sky Sports is finally available, so I am off to watch it on the ol' TV.
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:48, archived)
you motherfucker.

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:50, archived)
Have we already discussed the best place to follow it online?

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:53, archived)
I was trying all the usual streaming sites but couldn't find a good one.
Was quite content to listen to the BBC online coverage but my shitty internet keeps cutting you.

Said I'd never have Sky again, but desperate times...
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:00, archived)
cricinfo
no question. Tends to get a bit trafficy for these games though.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:02, archived)
My student house was 200 yards from the ECB Cricket centre.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:52, archived)
I think this is unlikely

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:50, archived)
All Bopara does is score centuries.
It's more likely than not
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:51, archived)
You'll be on the sex offenders register before the end of the day.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:45, archived)
Arsenal will, yet again, fail to win a major tournament.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:45, archived)
Liverpool and Manchester United very close for the title
Chelsea not very far behind, win champions league.

Arsenal, West Ham, Aston Villa, Tottenham, Everton and Man City all finish within 10 points with each other from 4th to 9th.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:47, archived)
I reckon Arsenal might get the Carling Cup.
And it'll be celebrated like we've just won the league.
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:55, archived)
and you'll suddenly forget all the insults you gave spurs for winning it a few seasons back

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:59, archived)
Are you going to invite Chad round and make out with him after you've put the baby to bed?
I've heard Chad is dreamy.
(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:45, archived)
He is, but even though he's a quarterback I refuse to date logical positivists.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:47, archived)
What about Cory?

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:51, archived)
Cory is super hot, but his thesis on Augustinian teleology was irredeemably flawed.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:53, archived)
He wets the bed.

(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:53, archived)
Take his Playstation and say "If you tell anyone, your parents won't love you any more.".

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:45, archived)
He's eighteen months old, gonz.
The playstation belongs to his father, and his father is bigger than me.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:48, archived)
That Sleeping Lions is the best game to play when baby sitting
Or get some cardboard boxes.

Or play 'Magical Adventure Snuffle Pugs'

This is what I do when babysitting.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:46, archived)
This is what I also play by myself

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:48, archived)
This is what I play in the bath.

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:48, archived)
You pretend to be me playing with myself?

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:54, archived)
How about
My Little Pug. A range of differently coloured toy pugs, possibly with pop-out and swap eyes.
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:52, archived)
I'LL BE A MILLIONAIRE

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:53, archived)
It'll start off hazy with intermittent showers, followed by thermonuclear armageddon.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:47, archived)
that the child hurts itself, and informs it's parents that you were fannying around on your laptop/phone when it happened...

(likeajackhammer, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:47, archived)
YOU, check the calendar for added Ireland awsomnity.
And for all you geeks helpful types out there; why is this laptop making me log in every time I post?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:51, archived)
Cookies deleted?
Using one of the proxies without realising?
(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:53, archived)
It's probably a cookie thing all right.
And it's very annoying.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:56, archived)
The child grows up to cynical twisted and disenfrancised.

(I helped save b3ta! RedStar returneth, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:47, archived)
haha, best yet.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:49, archived)
*changes answer to this*

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:50, archived)
Only I'd spell it right.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:50, archived)
Perhaps he means it will never vote in a Gallic election
this might not be seen as a bad thing, though.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:54, archived)
I'd vote in a Gaelic elction
But I'd be scared of the boggers that'd get in.
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:57, archived)
I like the Taisoeach's nickname
I really wish the English weren't so crap at ridiculing our politicians.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:59, archived)
Really?
You don't think Gordon CLOWN and Tony bLIAR are the wittiest insults in the history of wit?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:01, archived)
I'd rather describe them as a pair of cunts
and deeply deplore the idiocy of British newspapers which won't print swearing.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:12, archived)
BIFFO Brian?
He's a spastic if ever I saw one.


*Glad he's far away from him now*
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:03, archived)
I was in the Dáil last night.
Watching Batt O'Keeffe speaking made me regret our nation's strict gun control laws.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:59, archived)
Watching Batt O'Keeffe makes me regret his parent goot together and decided to have a baby.

(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:05, archived)
was that tears as in crying
or 'tears' as in ripping apart a toddler with your cock

or both?
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:48, archived)
hilarious consequences

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:48, archived)
I have no doubt that we'll all get to hear about them
online.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:49, archived)
i cant take this level of excitement

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:50, archived)
with sexy results

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:50, archived)
im off to the spoons
it just all too much
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:57, archived)
CHAOS

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:49, archived)
I predict you need to get a job.

(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:52, archived)
Spider!
How are the Aussies? Is there anyone in the country who's not in the pub?
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:56, archived)
Haven't a clue.
Pubs are ages away and I'd rather get stoned than pay $40 traveling to the pub.
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:00, archived)
That's not a prediction.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:57, archived)
You will do the job and the parent will return home and thank you for your deed.
You go home unchanged by the evening's events.
Also your nutsack will be bone dry.
(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:56, archived)
My bone is never dry.

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:58, archived)
Right. I'm off to India on Friday.
What invaluable sentences will I need to be able to say?
Already on my list:
'Hot here, isn't it?'
'This is where them Pakistanis come from, then?'
'Have you not got any beef Patel, if that is your real name?'
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:21, archived)
"I'm not racist but..."

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:22, archived)
Hmm.
My dictionary doesn't have racist. Can you rephrase it?
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:23, archived)
"Excuse me! Don't you know how to queue? Honestly!"

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:24, archived)
"I can has cheeseburger?"

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:26, archived)
"Tell me the truth. Was that thing that just bit me posionous?"

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:32, archived)
I wouldn't let one on my bus.

(I helped save b3ta! BindiBaji, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:27, archived)
WHY DON'T YOU JUST FUCK OFF BACK WHERE YOU CAME FROM

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:23, archived)
Make sure you refer to all people out there as "Pakis"
regardless of race, religion or creed.

It's what some of the english have been doing for years, and they've developed a familiarity with it.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:23, archived)
CHIPS....you know CHIPS!!

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:24, archived)
"I love Slumdog Millionaire Cosplay, those funny mutilated begger kids look well real lol"

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:24, archived)
Also if you feel the need to kiss a girl, get real close, and then bust into song and dance. Everyone will join in too within a radius of 2 miles

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:26, archived)
My loony bun is fine, Benny Lava!

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:27, archived)
and magically change costume a few times during such events

(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:27, archived)
God I fucking love Bollywood.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:29, archived)
Also, moist towellettes over there aren't called 'Ghandi-Wipes'

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:27, archived)
aren't they?
fucksocks
(VampirEvil Nobody appreciated my humour, so I'm gone., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:32, archived)
Think how I felt when I went Rock Climbing and though crampons were something you get when you forget to stretch your cunt when on your period before ascending

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:37, archived)
Just remember to pay double for blind kids

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:24, archived)
ma chud = mother fucker
ben chud = sister fucker

gorah = whiteboy

i'm sorry i don't have anything useful to add.
(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:24, archived)
Ever

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:25, archived)
when dancing you can also say "jai ho!"
and try to blend in as one of them
(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:26, archived)
*dances*
*screws in the lightbulb*
*feeds the chickens*
*does the sprinkler*
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:31, archived)
Make the montion for screwing in a light bulb and also shake your head in time to the music.
You are now dancing bollywood style.
(I helped save b3ta! BindiBaji, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:37, archived)
FACT:
The hindi for brother-in-law saalaa also doubles as a term of abuse; to call someone 'saalaa' is to imply that you have fucked their sister.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:27, archived)
tbh, some casts are so inbred
this just goes without saying xD
(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:30, archived)
It's quite comforting to know that for once in my life
my pasty white northern skin will mean I am treated like a god for a few weeks.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:30, archived)
So remember not to ask waiters for a salad in that slow clear British way of talking to foreigners
"No, I want a salad... a saaaaa-laaaaaaaaa-GETYOURHANDSOFFME!"
(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:30, archived)
My name is Derek I live in Bolton, how may I help you?

(I helped save b3ta! BindiBaji, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:25, archived)
Mera naam Derek hu mai Bolton me rahta hu, kya me aap ki sadad dena sakta hu?

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:29, archived)
Impressive
Is it an easy language?
(I helped save b3ta! BindiBaji, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:33, archived)
If you understand grammar, then it's not overly difficult.
It's easier once you've learnt the alphabet (57 letters, all syllables, no ambiguity like English or French), as it doesn't Romanize to a universal standard.
However, grammatically speaking:
Subject-object-verb ie. I oranges eat.
No articles, ie. a, the
Postpositions, not prepositions ie. Spoon with, not with a spoon.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:42, archived)
I might struggle then.
Being out there must be the bet way to learn. You having lessons?
(I helped save b3ta! BindiBaji, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:59, archived)
Teaching myself.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 12:08, archived)
MEE NAM DURICK AHAI IV IN BOWLTUN HAOW MAAY EYE HELUP OOO
see
easy
(I helped save b3ta! RedStar returneth, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:45, archived)

"Give me the hottest curry you've got Sanjay, with chips"
(I helped save b3ta! C, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:27, archived)
AS BLAND AS POSSIBLE.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:34, archived)
AND A FORK AND KNIFE!

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:42, archived)
Need... Toilet Roll

(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:30, archived)
I DON'T LIKE CRICKET
OH NO
I LOVE IT
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:34, archived)
I don't like gmos.
That's true, sorry.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:40, archived)
:D
BLOFELD
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:42, archived)

also,
www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJD8o5rYiFE
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:48, archived)
Mujhe ko pasand cricket nahi hai
oh no
me pyarta hu
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:47, archived)
lol

(likeajackhammer, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:35, archived)
phonetically spelt:
tusi-bura kuti-hay = you're an evil bitch
(Peter_G, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:36, archived)
better to live a day as a tiger than a lifetime as a sheep
www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mrO5a5k1z0
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:39, archived)
if you were a computer game character, which one would you be and why?
I'd probably be the dwarf from Golden Axe 'cos i'm short and hairy and like to go around hitting things.

Which one would you be?

example answer:

I'd probably be a boomer from L4D as I'm fat, and waddle when I walk.. and I also like to spill bile everywhere I go.
Friz
(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:20, archived)
I'd be a whiny pain in the arse posting shit "personality" questions on the internet.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:21, archived)
What the fuck is wrong with you?

(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:21, archived)

I'd probably be Chun Li from Streetfighter, so I could strip off and stand in front of a mirror looking at myself for hours. Or leisure suit Larry.

Does anyone know what's wrong with 4chan? - it doesn't appear to be working today.
(I helped save b3ta! C, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:22, archived)
It's probably trolled itself to death.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:22, archived)

I hope not :-(
(I helped save b3ta! C, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:23, archived)
i think i saw her boobs once
on a cartoon
(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:22, archived)
OI!!!! GET YOUR OWN HILARIOUS EXAMPLES!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:22, archived)
You get your royalty fees!

(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:23, archived)
Leisure Suit Larry

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:22, archived)
Or Chuck Rock.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:23, archived)
fuck yes
great game
(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:23, archived)
I'd be manic miner.

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:37, archived)
"A squid with Gonzo's face"
I think they do it a grave injustice:
seawayblog.blogspot.com/2009/01/piglet-squid-into-abyss-lives-squid.html
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:30, archived)
Poor 90nz0, terrible bullying, etc etc

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:31, archived)
I want a Dumbo Octopus

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:31, archived)
Terrible bullying of Pickle Fairy

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:18, archived)
you'd love a girl with tentacles, don't lie

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:20, archived)
Have you gazzed cr3 yet?
He needs to be informed of the multiple account holder from earlier!

Edit: In fact he's just posted a new message, you can't have told cr3 :(
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:20, archived)
Squidward!

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:31, archived)
I was expecting more facial chin fluff and a tight, jewish mini fro'

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:32, archived)
YYYAARRR!
portlandoctopus.com/files/2008/05/pugcrawlgallery1.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:33, archived)
Posh Shark Foetus
is not amused.
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:35, archived)
Fonz-otter
says heeeeeyyyyyyyy
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:37, archived)

Hide & Seek fish is doing a roffle
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:38, archived)

now that's got something...cat-like about the eye there
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:39, archived)
in this repository of fish pictures that you seem to be browsing,
have you come across any fish with orange eyebrows?

i know they exist but nobody ever knows what i'm talking about!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:50, archived)

www.gahaghan.com/galapagos/Photos/Fish/photo138.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! C, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:01, archived)

cosmetic-candy.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/chris-evans.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:04, archived)
that's not a fish
that's a lizard
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:10, archived)
naw, they've actually got weird orange bits that stick out above the eyes
oh i dunno, maybe i'm spiralling into madness

cluck cluck, gibber. my old man's a mushroom, etc.
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:06, archived)
this isn't what i was looking for but it'll do!
farm1.static.flickr.com/42/80725930_653013cd39.jpg?v=0
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:10, archived)

Oh hai. Oink glub.
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:33, archived)
heheh seapug

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:35, archived)
S'PUG!
morning DG
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:38, archived)
Word up Skybound
My brain...it no work today...breen breen
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:39, archived)
today?
haha i'm insinuating you is thick

i'm going to be in lundun tomorrow but i'm not venturing north of the river so you won't bump into me
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:49, archived)
Aw :(
Why not? Soho is where the 'Hos are Fo Sho'
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:51, archived)
i'm going to see my friend's band
in a pub in lewisham

got all day in london friday so i might come and throw stones at your window while you're trying to work
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:55, archived)
Sweet as dude, I'll take you out for a lunchtime beer if you fancy it?
let us know if you're around :)
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:56, archived)
hmm. might already be meeting someone for lunch.
thanks for the offer, i'll let you know!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:57, archived)
furry muff :)

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:01, archived)
morning fuckfarmer

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:16, archived)
SARF EAST

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:19, archived)
I can see rashers on it
I might be hungry
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:36, archived)
I would like to try bacon rings

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:32, archived)
That can only be a euphemism for pig fanny.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:35, archived)
Pig arse, surely?

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:38, archived)

www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Squid%27s%20Beak
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:39, archived)
yaaa

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:40, archived)
It's like an aquatic spacehopper.

(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:11, archived)
BOING!
morning, chap
a question: do you have prototype?
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:15, archived)
My goodness!
A seacreature with Friz's face!
i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2008/10/17/article-1078507-0224CEE0000005DC-307_634x410.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:15, archived)
Ashes!
Anyone care to join me in some beers, wide rimmed hats, and a monocle?
(Nalr I'll get the coals, you bring the burgers., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:10, archived)
no

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:10, archived)
no

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:11, archived)
NO.
FOOTBALL LOLS:
www.oleole.com/media/main/podcasts/arsecast/ADE_BROCHURE.pdf
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:11, archived)
Not being funny,
but he's one of the shittest players in the premiership, and if Arsenal get 10p for him you should be chuffed.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:13, archived)
I really can't stand him.
I don't see why we can't palm him off to Fiorentina in exchange for Melo. Everybody wins that way.
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:14, archived)
He's lazy, a massively arrogant twat, and has no consistency.
On his day, he's fantastic, but you can't be at a top team when you only play well once in every 5 games.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:16, archived)
You have never been so right.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:17, archived)
If the rumours are right,
you're willing to sell Fabregas if they meet £40m.

If you do that you'll only have RVP who's an actual footballer.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:21, archived)
And Arshavin.
To be honest, I don't think Fabregas will go this summer. I can't see anyone matching that valuation for a player who was injured for a lot of last season.
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:23, archived)
Arshavin is wonderful, but I give it 2 months before he's completely Arsenalled
and refuses to shoot from outside the box, becomes a massive complaining knob end and blacks up and speaks with an african accent.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:25, archived)
I hate to admit it, but that's at least partially true.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:26, archived)
I think Wenger needs a new assistant manager,
someone who can have a good influence and open up their play a bit more, get it back to how it was during the title winning seasons.

Plus, he could do a Fergie and refuse to speak to the BBC so we don't have to hear his massively hypocritical rants... like the stoke game when RVP assaulted the Stoke keeper, but wenger "did not see" that and instead ranted about how the stoke players hacked arsenal out of the game.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:29, archived)
You're right there.
I'd also say that we need to look at getting a couple of well established players. Not some youngster from a French team. We need someone who knows the ropes, especially in defence.
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:34, archived)
You needed Barry or Palacios

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:37, archived)
and then breaks into a thousand tiny pieces
and we have to listen to Wenger say "it is only a niggling injury, he'll be back in 3 or 4 weeks"

- see also - Rosicky and the last 18 bloody months.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:26, archived)
if you put "non-breakable" in there
I'd have to agree.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:24, archived)
because the current rumour mills
suggest that Juve have already bought Melo.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:22, archived)
If you were Melo,
would you even consider arsenal?
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:23, archived)
this is awesome :D

(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:23, archived)
people have been trying to ask you, why do you have two accounts here?

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:28, archived)
y'see, it's a bit odd, you post as El Guiri then you post as northern wifeb3ta
just not clear as to why, is all
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:31, archived)
are you compensating for being short?

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:32, archived)
do you put people who ask about your two accounts on ignore?

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:43, archived)
WHY DO YOU HAVE 2 ACCOUNTS, YOU TITBOX?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:56, archived)
ffs
im just lazy.. el guiris auto logged in at work...

its for when i get stepped
(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:04, archived)
AN ANSWER!
a possible solution: don't do twatty stuff that'll get you stepped?
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 11:07, archived)
What the hell are you talking about?

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:11, archived)
Oh well done.
You've completely sodded up our 2-Unlimited tribute.
(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:12, archived)
There was no way I was going to let it happen anyway.

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:14, archived)
Christ! That sounds like fun.

(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:12, archived)
Too early for beer,
hats are for gays,
and I'm not proficient in monocle wearing.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:12, archived)
I've already got a superb hat
but it's not sunny round here, so I'll stick with the beers.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:13, archived)
WORST POKEMON EPISODE EVER

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:14, archived)
Yes please!
I love cricket, with the knocking it for 6 and all the crazy outfits
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:14, archived)
Hmm no

(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:16, archived)
no

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:18, archived)
no

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:19, archived)
no THERE'S NO LIMIT

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:20, archived)
Needs more nos

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:21, archived)
I couldn't be fucked
I'm soooooo not awake yet.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:25, archived)
Poor show

(thediscokingpin, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:29, archived)
eye nose

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:38, archived)
I'll go for that.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:19, archived)
I'm going to be doing a metric shitload
of "working from home" this week. So yes.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:21, archived)
YES

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:37, archived)
I like toast, I like Star Wars.
But this just doesn't make any sense.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:51, archived)
You don't make sense

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:53, archived)
I make plenty of sense purple monkey dishwasher.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:56, archived)
green shit, madam

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:54, archived)

this boggles me
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:56, archived)
Christ

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:56, archived)

this boggles me
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:57, archived)
They don't look like a happy couple.

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:58, archived)
no
they look like a special couple
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:00, archived)
"BAAAAH?"
"HAAAAAAAA!"
(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:02, archived)
I'd use it as a secret handjob glove to use when outdoors so you don't get ball shrivel

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:03, archived)
“What a piece of junk!”

(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:56, archived)
I saw a Spongebob Squarepants toaster in John Lewis at the weekend
it printed him onto your sandwich. Fantastico!
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:01, archived)
A toaster that does stereograms
would be better.
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:07, archived)
It doesn't even look very much like Darth Vader.
Looks like Elmer Fudd in a kaiser helmet.
(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:07, archived)
"Erm *chews carrot* What's up Darth?"

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:09, archived)
ha

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:12, archived)
I walked from one country to another today
what are your plans for this lovely day
(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:20, archived)
clicking my mouse a lot

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:21, archived)
Not sure.
Given my absolute, total failure to bake cookies yesterday, I might return to something easier and bake a cake. Carrot, of course.
(I helped save b3ta! Bats, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:22, archived)
Carrot cakes are yum
I've always wanted to make a beetroot cake, but never got round to it :P
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:23, archived)
ooh nice
i'm quite rubbish at cooking. last week I asked a girl at work to make me a banoffie pie, and she went home and made one in about 15 mins. I was SHOCKED.
(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:23, archived)
Banoffee pie is not cake.
It is most easily done in a microwave and doesn't count when the nearest you get to cooking is mixing up a toffee mix.

It does, however, look absolutely scrummy. *Ponders*
(I helped save b3ta! Bats, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:26, archived)
It depends if you make chocolate pastry for the base
If you make the pastry and toffee by hand then it must be cooking?
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:31, archived)
Cooking yes, but it's not cake.
It seems I fail miserably with anything that isn't cake in the strictest definition of the word.
(I helped save b3ta! Bats, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:36, archived)
Can you make pineapple upside-down cake?
I failed miserably when I tried to make that :(
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:38, archived)
I fail with pastry
hot hands. cr3, however, makes fantastic pastry. I fear this will lead to me becoming a fatty.
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:41, archived)
i always have cold hands but i have only made pastry like 3 times ever.

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:45, archived)
*presses icy mitts on the back of your neck*

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:45, archived)
aaaargh
I'm better at making savoury things. Not pie, though.
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 10:02, archived)
Work
Get my saddle clamp replaced at lunch
Hoover the house when I get home, followed by gym and maybe Everquest II tonight.
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:22, archived)
Trying to ignore the people I work with,
They're arguing about university.
It's pre 9:30 and one of them has already called the other a facist.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:22, archived)
Is it the stars on his head and the big combat boots?

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:24, archived)
I can't remember something about not subsidising Ba and only subsidising Bsc's

(PsychoChomp, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:27, archived)
We need more SCIENCE
Vyvyan
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:29, archived)
does he wear one of those green shirts with a german badge on the side
which were popular in the 80's?
(El Guiri the only b3tan who is not fat, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:25, archived)
They are still popular among students and of course rob

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:27, archived)
I bought one of them at glastonbury
because it was raining.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:28, archived)
why do you keep switching between accounts?

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:27, archived)
Who is the other account(s)?

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:31, archived)
He has me on ignore.
I'm not sure if this is both accounts
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:36, archived)
its no good checking here
he never answers the "two accounts!?" posts anyway
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:47, archived)
I'm going to watch a bit of the ashes

(I helped save b3ta! Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:34, archived)
I'm going to buy some sandals.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:38, archived)
*eurgh* *pah*
The dopy sod at the shop has put milk in my coffee.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:48, archived)
I don't understand why you need two accounts when you could just be doubly shit with the one account
please clarify
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:39, archived)
he never answers these accusations
i too would like to know why
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:45, archived)
Working
Then going home and packing as I am away tomorrow for the weekend. Yey.
(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:41, archived)
I have a new zekken
it says gecko in japanese.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:44, archived)
I smell of garlic :)

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:45, archived)
Could someone ask this shitcunt if he has me on ignore on both of his accounts?

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:50, archived)
I'm off to work where I have no internet connection.
HAHAHAH!
And the scum next door are shouting at each other again.
AHAHAHAHAH!
And I had peanut butter for breakfast.
HAHAAHAHAH!
And I need to shit.
HAHAHAHAHA!
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:09, archived)
This all comes as a great relief.
Shame about Friz dying though. I didn't think he was nearly as shit as some of the other noobs.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:10, archived)
Friz died?
Is there a peeled whale in Michael Jackon's Thames?
(I helped save b3ta! DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:14, archived)
It's just occured to me
Was his name pronounced Frizz, or Frits? Only I don't want to make a completely fool of myself at the memorial concert.
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:16, archived)
I think he changed his username from Fritz to Friz

(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:20, archived)
This never happened
You can't just write a false history about me.

Shitcunt.
(__, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:21, archived)
I said "I think"
Fatty fat fat fatty friz it is then.
(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:24, archived)
You are nine kinds of shit

(__, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:25, archived)
list them please, zombie friz

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:47, archived)

shit, good shit, dogshit, bullshit, batshit, apeshit, no shit sherlock, horseshit, and you sunk my battleshit.
(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:24, archived)
Where the fuck is there a T in my name
It's "Friz".

Be more sensitive.
(__, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:21, archived)
Who the fuck are you?

(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:29, archived)
It's a GHOST!

(I helped save b3ta! DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:30, archived)
you forgot the 'g-g-g-'

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:47, archived)
he's a c-c-c-c...

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:52, archived)
who is, spong?
in that case, a c-c-c-cor blimey, a pregnant man?
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:56, archived)
PREGNANT AGAIN jesus HOW MANY BELLIES DO YOU NEED?

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:14, archived)
Four. Like a COW
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:18, archived)
HELLO MOOOOOOOO I AM A COW I HAVE COW EYES AND FLIES AND EVERYTHING

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:25, archived)
*tickles udders*

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:30, archived)
RED ELENOR ROCKET HOW DARE YOU!
*grabs you by the ear and drags you away*
(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:33, archived)
Awwwwm MUM!

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:46, archived)
I'd rather have a piece of t-t-t-toast

(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:18, archived)
Ha ha.
Desree, modern poet.
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:19, archived)
Sckeeby deeby bup-bah Evening news, cats yeah!
*bongos*
(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:26, archived)
you read dinosaur comics
i could just hug you for that
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:55, archived)
Foreva in R Hartz , RIP John Shittleworth

(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:56, archived)
RIP Ondray Da Giant. Wiv da angles now

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:59, archived)
I'm staying at home where I have internet connection
and an endless supply of tea.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:14, archived)
and what if you run out of milk

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:20, archived)
I bet some women just squirt a bit of their own in when no one's looking

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:58, archived)
MAKE ME TEA

(I helped save b3ta! crazyjude is very happy with happytoast and his skill, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:47, archived)
I think baldmonkey should take his online greatness to Britains got talent
He should sit on the stage with laptop connected to a projector screen and show everyone how great he is.

I am sure he would win.
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Sp@m, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:14, archived)
I'm going to spend today
analysing the distribution of H and A in your post to find the hidden message. Then I will obey.
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:15, archived)
Hello I have a belleh.

(I helped save b3ta! DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:20, archived)
*wubwubwub*

(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:29, archived)

h nd
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:29, archived)
it was one of them gave me the belleh

(I helped save b3ta! DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:30, archived)
You want to take it in the arse more often
Slightly less chance of sproggage.
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:38, archived)
Mykey's Tips For Parents, now £14.99 at your local Borders

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:44, archived)
It comes with a free empty packet of pickled onion monster munch
for when you get caught up in the moment
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:46, archived)
on the salt'n'vinegar strokes

(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:38, archived)
I find bumsex uncomfortable and not at all erotic.

(I helped save b3ta! DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:44, archived)
Oh see that just makes it all the more sexy

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:46, archived)
My missus has gone all 'back door' lately
It's a bit of a worry
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:48, archived)
Bite on a pillow, you'll get used to it eventually

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:50, archived)
Blood isn't the worst lube...

(I helped save b3ta! L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:54, archived)
I set 'em up...

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:00, archived)
oh for fucks sake

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:18, archived)
fuck orf
took me two hours to get to work today
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:18, archived)
Wrong train?

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:33, archived)
loltrainmong

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:36, archived)
rofltrainspazlol

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:38, archived)
Just had 4 days off during
a "churn". @ least the dog got walked for a change.
Over 200 non-spam from 3 inboxes.
'king'ell. I've got to unsub from some of those.
On a tangent I have 4 copies of "A Secret Country" by John Pilger on my shelves - n e 1 want 1?
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:33, archived)
Some of that makes sense.
Is English your second language?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:36, archived)
I changed ISP's
(hence the term "churn" maybe it's an Aussie ISP thing) & I was moderately surprised that I had over 200 messages in my 3 inboxes.
Also I have 4 copies of this - catalogue.nla.gov.au/Record/18448 & I wondered if any b3tans would like a copy.
No, Japanese is the only other language I know.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:19, archived)
im scared and confused

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:39, archived)
70,000+
I've been saying it for months, why does no one listen?
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:41, archived)
because you're a shitcunt

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:10, archived)
I'd comfort you but you'd have to put up with a sly titting up.
I'm not sure that you're amenable to that.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:41, archived)
I've just seen Emma Watson flashing her underwear.
In the Mail, no less. Just thought I'd say.
(I helped save b3ta! Bats, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:16, archived)
i knew her when she was nice and not stuck up
BACK IN THE DAY
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:19, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/6282835
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 9:21, archived)
Wow.
The DWP's web filters have upgraded b3ta from USELESS to TASTELESS AND OFFENSIVE .
(I helped save b3ta! C, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 7:51, archived)
I'm a grown up
I can look at what I like on the internet. I can also have a fish finger butty for breakfast. I'm at the vanguard of modern revolutionary thinking.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 7:56, archived)

I prefer to look at things that THE MAN has approved as being suitable for me to look at on the 'net.
(I helped save b3ta! C, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 7:58, archived)
you sure its not just the man you want to see?

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 7:59, archived)
Yes.




*blushes*
(I helped save b3ta! C, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:11, archived)
That, sir, is the best breakfast.

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:27, archived)
no access?
fuck that, I'm withdrawing my applications. :)
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:01, archived)
DON'T WORRY!
They haven't blocked the IP: 207.44.242.20/
(I helped save b3ta! C, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:09, archived)
phew....

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:10, archived)
You work for the Democratic Workers Party?
You pinko scum.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 8 Jul 2009, 8:07, archived)

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