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# If the cap benefits, wear it
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:45, archived)
# needs moar FRESH!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:47, archived)
#
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:51, archived)
# This whole "big society" thing is a joke.
You don't see the toffs saying "well, we should cap the bankers and higher paid salaries to 250K and give the rest back to the government as that's more than enough to live on.
It's one rule for the dole scum and one rule for the super rich! Tchoh.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:48, archived)
# that's why his cap doesn't fit
the tiny-mouthed cunt.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:50, archived)
# just wait till those dole scum are sacked former council employees who end up with the "opportunity" to the exact same job they had previously with no wage
lol, the big society! \o/
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:51, archived)
# eh?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:58, archived)
# Diagram needed?
Councils have cut down on spending and labour costs.
After six months of signing on people must do "voluntary work" usually for the local authorities...
meaning those that lost their jobs when the council cut back end up doing there old job just to keep their dole money!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:00, archived)
# at least on the good side, due to the fucked up way the funding works it's taken out a few unemployment business leeches already
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:03, archived)
# True,
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:07, archived)
# eh? were my words too complicated
are you not aware of the work programme?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:01, archived)
# no, just the missed comma
and the fact that i had no idea you were refering to council workers being sacked, then being asked to do their previous job for free.
i am aware of the work for free shit and it being contested in court.

dole scum being sacked? how can you be sacked from not doing anything, isn't that called being employed?

i do think it can be a good idea for the unemployed to do community work, but not for free (and community doesn't really mean a thing nowadays)
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 13:18, archived)
# it's spelling error
it's "beg society" - the plan is to impoverish everyone and make the only viable source of income being begging.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:06, archived)
# ROB!
I thought you only existed in theory!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:16, archived)
# I'm a bot
the real Rob spent all the donation money and left years ago
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:25, archived)
# Well where did my £14.75 go last week?
*shakes fist
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 13:12, archived)
# I can't believe so many people are surprised...
It's the FUCKING TORIES

(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:26, archived)
# hahaha!
Well quite!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:31, archived)
# the unemployed are an unutilised cost sink
I have a plan to fix this!

Harvest their organs and vital juices!

and convert the unneeded remains into soap.

Oh wait! This might be harmful to the the 42" plasma screen industry

/daily mail blog

:D
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:34, archived)
# Drawing an equivalence between entitlement to money through earning it, and entitlement to money through being needy, produces quite strange results.
Not that results aren't quite strange already what with banks having been bailed out due to being needy, and the whole concept of entitlement to money through being needy is quite strange in the first place, but there you are.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 13:06, archived)
# I don't expect anyone to get this
So I'll abandon it here if I may?

Footblols!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:01, archived)
# My first exposure to animals with tits
It ruined my childhood and turned me into the bitter, misogynistic deviant you see today. DAMN YOU KIA-ORA
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:04, archived)
# Haha
Redknapp still wins the 'Football manager who looks most like Eric Idle' award.
It's a very specific awards ceremony.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:04, archived)
# When I was searching for the source pic
I realised he didn't look anything like I thought he did... if you know what I mean.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:08, archived)
# Great Scott!


Click for bigger (230 kb)


Threw this together in ms paint, mate said I should post it here.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:12, archived)
# GREAT SCOTT!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:15, archived)
# TITPANTS the new name for "BRA"
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:21, archived)
# titpants would be accurate for some of the droopy women round here.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:23, archived)
# "droopy woman"
"waaaalking down the street"
"droopy woman"
"with her ankle teats"
"droopy woman"
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:29, archived)
#
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:33, archived)
# *edits in derogatory comment about Drimble*
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:37, archived)
# That's the last time I give you any Adobe tips :'((((
I've had it with this place! Game over, man!

          LEAVING 5-EVA
 


( Drimble, Tue 24 Jan, 11:41, Add friend, Ignore, Hide, I like this!, Reply)
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:41, archived)
# NOW IN INTRNT HVN WID DE ANGLES
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:41, archived)
#
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:39, archived)
# your friend was correct
welcome to b3ta, hope you like yiff porn
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:16, archived)
# Welcome
Pull up a chair, anthropomorphise and ordain an underage rabbit
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:24, archived)
# you forgot gender reassign
oh, and cut finger
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:25, archived)
# Sorry
Pull up a chair, anthropomorphise and ordain an underage rabbit Attempt to justify borderline manga noncery with explanations of sex change surgery or previous teacher molestation
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:29, archived)
# >_<

(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:38, archived)
# and I'm spent.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:42, archived)
# Pikachu rape!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:42, archived)
# nice
i came to chew gum and kick ass
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:26, archived)
# You've got a mate? You're in the wrong place then ;)
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:26, archived)
# You stand on the brink of an abyss, my friend.
Do you back away, cowed by the dark figures you see haunting the crevices and dark places, or do you grease up and dive in headlong?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:42, archived)
# *votes for greasing*
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:45, archived)
# They Live AND BTTF in your first post
you will do well here
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:29, archived)
# I like this

welcome to b3ta you'll never leave
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:31, archived)
# How do!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:07, archived)
# Keith Richard's shaved his head?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:10, archived)
# Nicely watched Paul the other day not a bad film a good giggle or two.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:13, archived)
# ^
From now on I'm not going to listen to what other people say about films, as I heard bad things about Paul yet thought it was pretty good. Likewise, everyone told me the new Conan was terrible but I loved it.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:16, archived)
# it's because people have confused artistic sensibilities
as they say, opinions are like assholes, most folk got their head up them

or something
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:18, archived)
# i thought paul was quite good too (not as good as sotd)
i think it would've been better if they'd played the characters more like they did in shaun of the dead
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:47, archived)
# Ta missus
I loved it after the rather poor Hot Fuzz :)
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:19, archived)
# I preferred Paul over Hot Fuzz too
Hot Fuzz had that sudden unsatisfying dip into surrealism halfway through (but it did have Adam Buxton dying in the most unexpectedly unpleasant way)
Paul kept me smiling from the moment it had Another Girl Another Planet on the soundtrack...
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:24, archived)
# See, I enjoyed Hot Fuzz.
Any film that features a copper fly-kicking a granny has got to have something going for it.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:55, archived)
# STAR WARS ALBUM COVERS!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:03, archived)
# That sounds amazing.
Someone could do a really funny one withi Gary Glitter and an ewok.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:10, archived)
# In Soviet Cambodia, Gary Glitter does funny one with ...
oh, wait
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:16, archived)
# You've succeeded in making Ronald even more scarier
HOW HAVE YOU DONE THIS
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:25, archived)
# Fucking hell
I would
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:25, archived)
# She's 28?
Christ, she's been used and abused a bit....
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:25, archived)
# She's had 4 kids
still would
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:26, archived)
# DEM STRETCH MARKS
Must have had a tough paper round...
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:29, archived)
# PHWOAR!
I bet that tastes salty.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:30, archived)
# That made me sick a little in my mouth.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:35, archived)
# *bokes*
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:46, archived)
# Probably from all the little sausages HHFH keeps chucking down there
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:46, archived)
# eww D:
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:47, archived)
# hahahahaha
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:55, archived)
# a barrage of wee willie winkies
one of them's bound to hit the spot
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:03, archived)
# Could be because she's a miserable cunt.
FFS love SMILE!

Then again.... DON'T!

*edit*
"Lisa started hitting the town last year after splitting from her long-term partner and father of her children Josh, 12, Jamie, 10, and daughters Billie, six, and three-year-old Angel."

So she was FIFTEEN when she got knocked up then!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:31, archived)
# Same father for all four kids though
That's a rarity
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:44, archived)
# So she says
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:45, archived)
# wow, who would've thought that
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:47, archived)
# Why is there a black one and a Chinese one then?
She's talking bollocks, you can guarantee that she is one of those leery, shouty, bottle of vodka in hand, falling about, slobbering whores you see every Saturday night crying sat in the middle of the road in a puddle of her own various juices.

Plus if she was dumb/drunk enough to waddle up and down for the bouncers amusement she deserves everything she gets!

I bet she did it with a swagger and one arm in the air thinking "god they must think I look fantastic" only to be ridiculed and howled at! Bouncers do get things right from time to time.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:50, archived)
# Various juices
lol
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:20, archived)
# WHORE!
(, Wed 25 Jan 2012, 17:10, archived)
# Hahaha
Excellent!
One of my friends went to school with her, as i found out when i shared that news story on facebook yesterday :-D
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:34, archived)
# So now lardass bouncers are self-appointed fashion consultants?
People should be free to go anywhere they want and do whatever they like. Even her.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:36, archived)
# They are some cracking norks
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:44, archived)
# they certainly look like they're cracking around the sides
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:04, archived)
# ^
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:07, archived)
# christ, what a miserable face, did someone steal her toaster?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:18, archived)
# ^ have
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:22, archived)
# Dear 28 year old mother of four
shouldn't you be at home looking after your children rather then pissing it up the wall on vodka every weekend?

what a shining example you set for your children, i expect that will butt prostitutes and on meth in their formative years through lack of moral guidance from yourself.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:22, archived)
# She must be the life of the party.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 14:35, archived)
# How very dare you!?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:18, archived)
# It's a big old RIS for me this morning I'm afraid
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:23, archived)
# :)
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:28, archived)
# Ah right
I don't really watch Little Britain so I don't know who Derek Faye is either
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:29, archived)
# I have an unreasonably high hatred for that woman!
Might be because she's not funny,
Might be because she is the spitting image of an ex of mine.
Might be because she is ginger,

But all are DAMN GOOD REASONS TO SHAKE MY FIST!
*shakes fist
Nice skills though.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:24, archived)
# I've really tried not to find Catherine Tate funny
but her old lady sketch slays me sometimes, as my gran was just like that (minus the swearing)

(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:29, archived)
[challenge entry] Stationery Wars!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:15, archived)
# hahahaha
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:17, archived)
# at least he died happy.
and covered in post-its.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=GjZjvEnRgTM
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:18, archived)
# Oh shit, that's a HE?
*Reverse-wanks*
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:32, archived)
# superb
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:18, archived)
# Hahaha
:D
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:19, archived)
# Haha
and POS-TITS
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:19, archived)
# Ha ha!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:20, archived)
# Hahahahaha
:D WOO
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:21, archived)
# Hee hee
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:24, archived)
# she seems so happy now
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:33, archived)
# There are few better ways to go.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:38, archived)
# stationery
top woo though!!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:02, archived)
#
*awards spotters' badge*
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:59, archived)
# :D
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:19, archived)
# hahahaha
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:34, archived)
# MORE pics of the lovely Moguragunsou pls k thx
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:53, archived)
# here ya go
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:06, archived)
#
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:27, archived)
# heh heh heh!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:52, archived)
# hahahhahahahahhaha!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:53, archived)
# hahahaha that's embassy-bombingly good
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 13:38, archived)
# Death by post-it is happy death.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 16:37, archived)
# it is the times we live in...
bring on the end
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 21:39, archived)
[challenge entry]
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 7:16, archived)
# :D
Ning RH

(ning real)
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 7:34, archived)
# i am a homonazi
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 8:47, archived)
# a/s/l?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 8:49, archived)
# jackboots / brass knuckles / sofabed
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:01, archived)
# If that sofabed is all stained and grimy
Then I'll be there in five.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:05, archived)
# Why won't you answer my calls, baby/ :(
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:28, archived)
# the calls are coming from inside the house
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:31, archived)
# morrissey WITH A WA PEDAL!!!!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:43, archived)
# more like a waaaaaahhhhhhhhhh pedal, am I right
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:53, archived)
#
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:57, archived)
# internet cira 2005
I kill children
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:01, archived)
# so tell someone you trust, like your parents, or your teacher, unless they're the one doing it, in which case tell someone else, unless they're all doing it together, in which case I give up kid, good luck with that
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:15, archived)
# and remember, only users lose drugs
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:19, archived)
# DON'T DO DOUGS
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:20, archived)
# Only Dumb-BOTS SMOKE!!!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:22, archived)
# this is a picture of Lake Minnewanka.
 
Let's say it together, shall we?

Lake Minnewanka.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:30, archived)
# Knock knock...
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:06, archived)
# TITPANTS
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:09, archived)
# sad mandela hahah
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:42, archived)
# hahaha
I laughed so hard that a little squeaky fart came out
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:55, archived)
# no
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:32, archived)
# oh jesus, that took a moment to sink in
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:06, archived)
# FILTH
 

 
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:29, archived)
# Phwoorr...
Sorry, I meant four... That's how many birthday boy I have been chosen today: Neil Diamond, Adrian Edmondson (in his fantastic band, The Bad Shepherds), John Belushi and Vic Reeves.




(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 6:51, archived)
# and todays girls are...
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 6:51, archived)
# Nice Vags WB.
Vic Reeves was VERY good in Eric and Ernie!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:22, archived)
# Lovely ladies!
And I loved Ade as Limbs Jones in Captain Star, but I've not seen much of his other work.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 13:26, archived)
# Eddie Hitler!


woo as always, Wobbly
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 8:01, archived)
# :)
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 8:21, archived)
# Neil Diamond time?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:32, archived)
# and Vic too, why not
www.youtube.com/watch?v=hAl_rz8OhX4

stuffies did always have a thing about making appalling videos and this was no exception
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:04, archived)
# Bollocks. Australia = B&:
"This video contains content from UMG and EMI, one or more of whom have blocked it in your country on copyright grounds.
Sorry about that."
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:18, archived)
# well that's just bullshit
it's the video for Vic Reeves doing "Dizzy" with the Wonderstuff

I had seen a live clip before but not the actual video, it's terrible
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:21, archived)
# Ahh.. I haven't heard that song for at least ten years...
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:30, archived)
#
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 4:26, archived)
# I GET THAT A LOT
 

 
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 4:38, archived)
# STRUTTIN DAT ASS
STRUTTIN DAT ASS STRUTTIN DAT ASS STRUTTIN DAT ASS
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 6:13, archived)
# oh, he'll get tired eventually, I'm sure.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 9:56, archived)
# me likey :)
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 5:51, archived)
# ^ Nice style!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 6:17, archived)
# CANDLE(s) !!!!
1111 Eleventy etc.

its my feckin 2nd b3taday innit.



What you get me then eh?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:25, archived)
# AIDS.
 
both kinds.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:28, archived)
# Fankoo
*covets*
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:30, archived)
# When you get to New Hope, you ain't gon be struttin dat ass.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:34, archived)
# STRUTTIN DAT ASS STRUTTIN DAT ASS STRUTTIN DAT ASS STRUTTIN DAT ASS
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:34, archived)
# he strut dat ass til he dead.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:38, archived)
#
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:43, archived)
# walkin', talkin', LOOKIN LIKE A FOOL WITH YOUR PANTS ON THE GROUND
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 2:23, archived)
# please, no
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 2:32, archived)
# STRUT DAT ASS, STRUT DAT ASS, STRUT DAT ASS, STRUT DAT ASS
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 3:10, archived)
# I got you an iFuck
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:56, archived)
# even works when you rotate
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:57, archived)
#
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 2:07, archived)
#
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 2:15, archived)
#
 

 
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 2:31, archived)
# Heeeeeeyyyyy
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 2:36, archived)
# Hahaha
What's that?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:55, archived)
# this surely ranks as the saddest birthday ever
lol
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 3:13, archived)
# oh I don't know
 

 
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 3:21, archived)
# They all look pretty happy to me
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 3:38, archived)
# HAPPY EVERYTHING
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 3:59, archived)
# ^ CANDLES!
Happy 1 year 11 months and 30 days

CAKE
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 6:19, archived)
# Hurrah!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 11:06, archived)
# I did this for my co-worker, JIM
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:16, archived)
# Is he ill?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:17, archived)
# mentally
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:28, archived)
# hello, JIM
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:33, archived)
# I THINK YOU WILL FIND IT IS PRONOUNCED "JIM" BUT IT IS SPELLED G-Y-M
 

 
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:49, archived)
# Hahahaha
unintentional Freebase.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:50, archived)
# lovely interpretation :)
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:50, archived)
# Nicely done!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:52, archived)
# MY EDITORIAL STYLE IS QUITE THE BEST
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:59, archived)
# haha...
uncanny resemblance.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:57, archived)
# hahaha!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:39, archived)
# Morning b3ta scroll
one freebase thread and half a freebase in a b3taday thread...did someone quit or take ill?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 6:05, archived)
#
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 7:48, archived)
# Eternal harmless(JollyJack,Denizen,LittleMaria)

E T E R N A L.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:50, archived)
# Nice one, Dave.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:52, archived)
# lololol
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:11, archived)
# Why is the cookie in a bag?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:53, archived)
# Why does the bag have a face?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:53, archived)
# WHY DOES HE ASSUME THE COOKIE IS POISON?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:55, archived)
# WHY DOES THE GUY HAVE MASSIVE KNEES ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:58, archived)
# XD Thanks!! XD
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:59, archived)
# Why a movie? Why tour?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:41, archived)
# Why do the musicians come out gradually?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:41, archived)
# What will the band do next?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:42, archived)
# Where do the odd movements come from?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:42, archived)
# Are live concerts better or worse than records?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:42, archived)
# Perhaps he is Tamatea
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:00, archived)
# Should I dare to ask what a noseflute is?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:01, archived)
# Is it when you've got a blocked nose
and every time you breathe out, it whistles?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:02, archived)
# he koauau, ko te kupu tika
hard to find good examples quickly in youtube, but here's the late Hirini Melbourne
www.youtube.com/watch?v=FaH6s-twdzU
 
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:46, archived)
# the wikipedia page is a fairly accurate summary
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nose_flute

but koauau aren't generally nose-flutes, I thought
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:59, archived)
# That's a long name for a hill.
Should have just called it "That hill over there".
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:02, archived)
# there's a few of those, too.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:22, archived)
# Te Puke thunder!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:26, archived)
# good times.
 
latest local variety I tried was Awhitu Gold, lol
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:09, archived)
# Te Boke!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:28, archived)
# It should listened to him!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:58, archived)
# All that glitter like snowing!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:00, archived)
# Where is his nose flute?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:10, archived)
# It's Moggy; you would too...
...or if not poison, rohypnol. XD
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:01, archived)
# I have to say, I love your style of art, but the content always confuses me.
and I'm never sure whether that is part of the intention...
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:54, archived)
# I like give confused to everyone XD
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:00, archived)
# Ahhhhhhhhh, so that's what this is all about.
I understand now*


* doesn't understand
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:01, archived)
# She like give confused to you.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:18, archived)
# Yes, I know
There's no room left in the kitchen cabinet
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:40, archived)
# You see, this is why Science Fiction has it so wrong.
Aliens land, speak English, and act like Americans. The chance of an alien being able to communicate rationally on any level when the alien concepts from only a few thousand miles away are so off-the-wall means we stand no chance with people from beyond the stars!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:02, archived)
# YES!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:06, archived)
# Especially when they're forced to try and ask
"Why are there so many pictures of us in vats of boiling piss?"
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:43, archived)
# FP THIS FOREVER
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:09, archived)
# This is basically how it works
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:42, archived)
# pfffffffffffffft!
 
MAKE SENSE LITTLE TRAIN.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:53, archived)
# I will always love his.
*This. What an advert for internet breathalyzers.
Cock.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 3:01, archived)
# I dislike his/her art style so I've adblocked the lot
What is it this time?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:03, archived)
# JollyJack and a little rabbit.
So... pretty much the same as every other time.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:06, archived)
# i see. then i don't regret keeping him/her/it adblocked
since i've seen this picture a thousand times before. though i gather there's a cookie in this one.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:33, archived)
# Cookies are implied, yes.
And there's some good old Engrish thrown in too.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:20, archived)
# Excellent stuff
I can picture it in my head. I think I need some more whiskey now.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:44, archived)
# I don't blame you.
It's how I feel every time she/he posts. I WOULD be on the vodka, but I've gotta be up fairly early. Not really advisable, is it?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:45, archived)
# There are few things nicer than waking up and taking a shower, still drunk
Also, I have to be up in about six and a half hours myself. Maybe I'll take a small whiskey and read in bed. Yes, that sounds like a good idea.

/Using B3ta as my blog, blog
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:48, archived)
# Mm, saying that
I've been trying to lucid dream recently. Having some sort of alcohol in my system conjures up weird dreams, could be interesting. *ponders*
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:53, archived)
# I've only managed to lucid dream a couple of times
both times it fell apart within seconds
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:07, archived)
# Yeah, it's how it's going so far.
I've started listening to tapes, etc. Shit DOES happen, but at this stage, not much. I mean, the most that's ever happened is I felt like I fell through the bed, and into zero gravity. Trippy.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:12, archived)
# It can be done;
If you practice. Make a habit of asking yourself whether you are dreaming while finding your hands or flicking a light switch and/or looking at text. The movie "Waking Life" is sophomoric but helpful with these points.

My favourite kind of lucid dream leaves the reality of the dream intact while allowing me a measure of omnipotence ie: there are zombies and I'm bored of using this shovel as a weapon, where is a Swiss army knife? Oh: right over there. Or: oh shit I hate working at this restaurant but hey I just realized I'm dreaming and this customer is kind of cute *does her on the table*.

So nothing too profound, but fun.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 1:32, archived)
# Allow please my elaborate, for your convenient:
1. LittleMaria is tempted Jack.
2. Jack has reluctant to eat the cookie, he thinks that LittleMaria to poison.
3. LittleMaria eats also the cookies, at the time as Jack.
4. Jack and LittleMaria die, in forever our heart :'(
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:49, archived)
# Yep, that's about the size of it!
Wait, sorry, I mean;

'Yes, It is about sense! Thanks!! XD'
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:55, archived)
# Small nun wants to kill Doctor Who with a cookie.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:07, archived)
# cool
that sounds like the plot for an entire series of doctor who these days
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:33, archived)
# I think she's commenting on the vile flavour of Blue Nun
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:14, archived)
# i think i'm going to buy a bottle of blue nun
and see what it's actually like. last time i was in germany i even found blue nun there, which quite surprised me. they weren't charging very much for it, mind you.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:34, archived)
# It's a bold statement about the confusion of modernity
in an ever changing cathartic neurosis of archaic anachronisms. The cookie represent the proverbial poison apple and JJ the snow white of anthropomorphic yiffery.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:23, archived)
# I think you forgot to switch over to your Japanese comedy account to post this.
Haha, RUMBLED! The truth is out!!!
:D :D
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:32, archived)
# haha
except that she's speaking english far too well to have forgotten to swap from the comedy account. she's not slipped yet.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:34, archived)
# As if I've got time to have a comedy account
As Mediocre's sig goes "this is my comedy account"
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:16, archived)
# Yeah, that's what you *say*
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:45, archived)
# so if jj is the snow white
is little maria (gender changed) the prince, or is she the wicked witch?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:35, archived)
# I'm as confused as you are.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:52, archived)
# maybe little maria (gender changed) is the prince
but zombie maria is the wicked witch.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:01, archived)
# LittleMaria is not gender change.
But Mine is gender changed version.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:02, archived)
# I'm very sorry
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:43, archived)
# Its honor XD
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:41, archived)
# It's like a japanophile pantseatflyer
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:21, archived)
# HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHH
Fucking hilarious stuff, keep it up
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:58, archived)
# XD Thanks!! XD
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:59, archived)
# :D
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:00, archived)
# GJM
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:59, archived)
# So is Jollyjack a nonce or a murderer?
He seems like a sinister fellow, regardless....

Nice and sparkly pic anyhoo
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:02, archived)
# he's much fatter and uglier in real life
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:05, archived)
# this is more unrealistic.
それ は いっちゃ だめ
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:08, archived)
# It went bad tea?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:10, archived)
# jp translation
It should not say.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:28, archived)
# In Moggy's eyes
anyone who isn't a rabbit child is a nonce, murderer or a mole drill sergeant.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:07, archived)
# Yeah.
Don't be wrong, I don't hate to real him. :D
in Japan, more disgusting people there.

But, He losing weight is better for his health I think.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:17, archived)
# Can you do a March hare next?
with fish, a hatter, a balloon, and a box of frogs?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:33, archived)
# He sweats profusely whenever a small talking child-rabbit is in the vicinity of his legs.
Mind you, I think I would too
WITH FEAR
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:20, archived)
#
LittleMaria: Don't be afraid.
You attempt to conquer Earth.
Jack.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:31, archived)
# mind = blown
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:34, archived)
# maybe he's a mixture of the two
A MURDERNONCE!

O_O


sounds like an itv detective series
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:39, archived)
# Don't get me wrong....
I'm not saying Woo Yay to Mongy... I just want to show off my new-woo and thank everyone for their suggestions last night.


(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:12, archived)
# woo to your woo pic
but I preferred the wooden surface one and bugger the size!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:29, archived)
# Ha ha ha....
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 6:21, archived)
# This is
AMAZOING
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:08, archived)
# Take your poorly disguised drug taking yiffing nonce porn and do one.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:13, archived)
# It's 'biscuit' not cookie.
Lern werds rite please.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:26, archived)
# Why Poul Daniels was cut finger?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:32, archived)
# To get to the other side.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:35, archived)
# He accidentally the whole thing.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:43, archived)
# Michael Ellis made fun of his picture.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:43, archived)
# We all cut our fingers in sympathy for your bullying by Michael Ellis.
Never forgive.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:54, archived)
#

(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:05, archived)
# Ringfinger also has another meaning.
Are you familiar with the word 'blurter' ?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:16, archived)
# *googles*
*laughs out loud*
*lies to wife about what was so funny*
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:40, archived)
# I don't think it is a medical term.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:43, archived)
# It's just the way google gives a 2 line preview from the urban dictionary on the search page that made me laugh!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:49, archived)
# I've got a few on there. [do a diana] is one.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:01, archived)
# I prefer 'twitter'
...between the twat and the shitter.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:08, archived)
# Hahahaha fucking hell!
My favourite phrase is probably 'like a dog eating hot chips'.

I dunno if it's on Urban Dictionary, but it's here in the Profanisaurus.
EDIT: It is.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:14, archived)
# :O
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:18, archived)
# :/
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:00, archived)
# I forgot to add
Fishcake cheese overcoat.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:05, archived)
# FUCKING HELL!
Is that you singing? That's awesome that is!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:07, archived)
# Oh come on
My singing on B3ta isn't new!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:10, archived)
# I don't visit /links much :(
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:13, archived)
# Well now you know
what you miss out on :)
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:15, archived)
# Ha! just been stalking you on your You Tube channel. Nice work.
BTW I saw Blondie at Friars Aylesbury in 1977!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:19, archived)
# Try me on B3mused, better.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:22, archived)
# You had him at "Try me".
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:25, archived)
# I might lose him
if he actually listens.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:30, archived)
# Never knew that existed.
2 years and still a noob.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:33, archived)
# B3mused is a great site.
My stuff is there too.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:41, archived)
# Oh! YES!
I must register and upload some of my stuff.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:34, archived)
# You're good!
No, really.

(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:17, archived)
# nice chanteusery!
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:34, archived)
# I like the little Miyazaki-type people
at the bottom left.
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:33, archived)
# Thank you ^^
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 8:09, archived)
# I'd like a poisoned cookie, I guess I'll have to bring my own

(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:42, archived)
# the cookie is harmless
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 8:08, archived)
# Here, have a nonsense I made getting the hang of illustrator
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:21, archived)
# Pfft.
Nice work, Mu.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:25, archived)
# With great Cider comes great irresponsibility.
Edit: much Woo!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:28, archived)
# Ahahah, you saved me the work of thinking up a tag line.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:33, archived)
# I've been mixing it with gin, for a refreshing summer drink
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:34, archived)
# Drink of my (misspent) youth was Pernod, blackcurrant and cider.
Made for great coloured vomit!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:35, archived)
# Slick, black and with a purpley rainbow sheen?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:36, archived)
#
Ah, a fellow conniseir connyseur connisewer boozer?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:38, archived)
# Ciderman would be an excellent superhero. :D
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:31, archived)
# You could have 2.
1 a rip off of spiderman, and another the rip off of the cybermen.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:38, archived)
# Pissed-up West Country cybermen would be amazing!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:51, archived)
# "Oy'll delete you, you facker!"
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:59, archived)
# Great Job Mu
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:35, archived)
# Nice!
Pubetrousers
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:50, archived)
# Those are not his trousers.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:53, archived)
# Also, Illustrator is one of the most contrary and least intuitive programs I've ever worked with.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:56, archived)
#
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:19, archived)
# Is this a suggestion or a contradiction?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:23, archived)
# Give this a try for a week or two, then see how confusing you think Illustrator is ;)
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:35, archived)
# Pubetrews
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:59, archived)
# we West Country folks likes this :)
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 22:51, archived)
# Does he like putting things in cider?
What does his wife think?
What does his wife think about him putting things in cider?
(, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 0:40, archived)
#
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:16, archived)
# He might as well just do this
for all the sense that ever comes out of his mouth
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:23, archived)
# prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrbbbbbbt
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:23, archived)
# Hypnotic.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:27, archived)
# *lowers pants and backs slowly towards screen*
hehehehehheehehehehehehehehehehehehe it tickles
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:32, archived)
# NEW! Official merchandise! On sale now!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:02, archived)
# Ha-ha!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:05, archived)
# Higgs' bosom is especially tasty in corn
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:08, archived)
# You idiot, it says CORN.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:10, archived)
# So it says, bosom, yeah?
*ninja-d, eh?*
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:14, archived)
# Eeek! Bad choice of font
Me idiot. apparently
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:16, archived)
# The Pope's favourite subatomic particle...
apparently you can't have mass without it. b'dum tisch. I thank you.
*fetches coat*
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:10, archived)
# Pffft! ;o)
happy b3taday BTW, an' thanks fa postin'
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:17, archived)
# Hahaha
Also: sorry...
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:17, archived)
# There's a higgs boson between my teeth, I wonder if CERN are interested

(I tweeted that text once, and it was picked up by a dutch newspaper)
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:33, archived)
# Graviton model available soon!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:43, archived)
# Neutrinos were sold out
before they even went into production
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:46, archived)
# I went to CORN and all I got was herpes
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:44, archived)
# I done a Sherlol.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:58, archived)
[challenge entry] I'll just pop this repost here
Whilst no-one is watching ;)
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:47, archived)
[challenge entry]
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:50, archived)
# Hahaha Boiling Mindpiss!

(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:55, archived)
# SAVOUR THE FLAVOUR!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:58, archived)
#

(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:22, archived)
# It's like deja-vu
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:50, archived)
# It's like deja-vu all over again
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:51, archived)
# ..and again
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:51, archived)
# etc. etc.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:52, archived)
# It's a glitch in the matrix.
(, Wed 25 Jan 2012, 11:19, archived)
# aaaa shit
I was also going to apologise as i posted a smaller version that 15 seconds later I removed. And I know how knarley that makes b3tans :S
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:53, archived)
# He he!
Good pic though!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:56, archived)
# ta muchly
and happy candle-day.
just goes to show how long it's been since I posted something on the mainboard :/
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:00, archived)
# Repoasting cunt.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:51, archived)
# ^ This
but also this

Ha ha ha ha...
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:53, archived)
# 15 seconds!
fascist!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:53, archived)
# Wot no cockphoto?
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:54, archived)
# Tell you what...
Have a cockphoto pearoast on your stockphoto pearoast

(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:29, archived)
# It's Groundhog Day.
Again.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:55, archived)
# Bloody hell!
I picked the wrong 15 seconds to post and delete!
Well it gives you all something to flame about I suppose
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 20:59, archived)
# Mind you, if the real Nazis were here, they'd go on about starting a thread with a repost, a compo entry with none of the stock photos, the complaining about flaming and the thread deletion.
Luckily, there's none around ;)
...and like I said ^^ nice pic!
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:02, archived)
# haha
been a long day. Wisdom tooth out and still a little woosey from the experience. Well that my excuse anyway ;)
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:04, archived)
# You could just have edited the orginal post rather than bailed on it.
Deleting also deletes any replies, and as most of use have IQs that seriously rival those of moss, it's similar to deleting a tiny part of our brains.
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:40, archived)
# I know I boobed
But I just didnt think peeps would have had time to reply with 15 seconds plus the image was tiny. I just lost all senses and went for delete instead of edit.
must stop hanging about in links and get back to being creative
(, Mon 23 Jan 2012, 23:47, archived)

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