Oh boy oh gee, it's almost the weekend.
Tell me your plans
and then dwell in the relative shadow that is my awesome weekend on a beach in Ingoldmells in the rain :/
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:56, archived)

haha fat relatives.

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:57, archived)

IM GOING TO HAVE CUGGLES AND DRINKY WINE AND BLINK HAPPILY

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:57, archived)

/spend a small fortune on my car and go to a hen night where i feel all out of place and awkward

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:57, archived)

/be hungover and babysitting :((((
WHY MEEEEE
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:58, archived)

Do you do one of those slow blinks when you're pissed?
Are you a happy drunk?
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:58, archived)

either affectionate or maudlin, but never outrageous or freaky.

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:59, archived)

I now have Missy Elliot's 'Get your freak on' in my head
Except 'freak' is replaced with 'Bink' 0.0
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:01, archived)

*eerie slidey head bobs*

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:02, archived)

this little binky will go to market
this little binky will be home
this little binky will be horribly drunk
this little binky will be skint
and this little binky will pee pee pee pee sick, all the way home.
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:05, archived)

+o

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:14, archived)

TT3D, a morning fry-up for a mates birthday, cricket at a ground in the arse end of nowhere, birthday pub crawl.
Sunday involves stuff that hasn't been planned plus MotoGP and F1.
( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:59, archived)

Tonight - cooking dinner for the family, wine, bit of work later maybe
Tomorrow - GOLF and PUB. Both wonderful things.

Sunday - god knows. Hopefully lazing.
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:04, archived)

OH MAAAAAN

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:05, archived)

i remember those days, those fine and duvet days.
those long mornings lazing
those fine evening sprawling

I MISS MY LAZY TIMES
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:06, archived)

I've been well busy this week and up at 6:30 every day
I've earned this :)
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:17, archived)

Oh SSS !
A girl who is very very swell and is a web developer (who knows at least the right buzz words) and likes food and dogs and chilling out in PJs and seems really relaxed and generally quite happy and looks really pretty... rated me 4/5 on OKCupid and OH GEE OH GOSH, she seems quite nice, so I replied to her 4/5 star thinggy this morning but she hasn't replied yet and I'm getting anxy 'cus I want her to reply !!!!*.... ok OKCupid.

OH MAN

* I'm joking about the 'why hasnt she replied yet' thing, she's probably at work or something.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:11, archived)

OH MAN OH GEE OH GONZ
Stay cool. It'll be ok. Just relax, give her the weekend, invite her for a drink and you'll be holding hands and watching hollyoaks with chinese food in no time.

Best possibly learn to drink lager or whiskey though.
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:17, archived)

Fabulous ! Maybe there is an opertunity to get a 241 Papa Johns and have the second pizza microwaved (ie, the next day, if you know what I mean.... WINK WINK)
I think maybe as she's a web des she'd be OK with me having some sort of cocktail.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:41, archived)

hospital visits, that's about it

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:07, archived)

Unless she carks it tomorrow.
Then you've got Sunday to please yourself. Shame that it's forecast for rain.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:24, archived)

true, then i'd go to work sunday, good to keep busy

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:27, archived)

oh mc :(

( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:49, archived)

Nice food tonight with dad
then hardcore revision for my last two exams over the weekend, and make some plans for how to spend the time afterwards.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:08, archived)

DRINKING YAY

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:22, archived)

Damn right
big outing after final exam, and then a debauched interlude with some other friends.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:25, archived)

Tomorrow I'm going to go to work for eight in the morning and stay there for eleven hours
On Sunday I'm going to go to work for eight in the morning and stay there for eleven hours
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:11, archived)

you work in a bouncy castle and icecream factory though right?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:14, archived)

Professional dog sexer

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:14, archived)

is it hard on a bouncy castle?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:15, archived)

Most things are made tougher on a bouncy castle
Apart from bouncing
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:17, archived)

pffffffffft
( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:49, archived)

I'll be playing Duke Nukem Forever all weekend

( CowJam, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:23, archived)

Well, tonight I will be convincing Ms Official that I ought to be taken to St Ives for my birthday again seeing as I've found a place for less than £400 a week ON THE FUCKING HARBOUR FRONT
Tomorrow I have chums coming for tea, so I'll be dicking about in the kitchen all day. Sunday I might go for food with wankers off the internet. Dunno yet. Is that ok?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 17:57, archived)

I approve of everything apart from the wankers off the internet part.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:21, archived)

Might not happen yet
Fingers crossed. This birthday thing is an issue though. There's a Specials gig in Coventry to try and shoe horn in. Specials. In Coventry. I can't miss that can I?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:33, archived)

That does sound like something you ought not to miss.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:06, archived)

I know
I suspect a great deal of beer fuelled skanking and joyous singing would be involved. I can't say no to that. Not without being an uncivilised oik.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:10, archived)

I shall be committing certain deeds

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:11, archived)

Those poor sheep.
:(
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:22, archived)

I'm going to a "no spring chicken" rave tonight.
I resent the implications in the title but I can't resist a bit of dancing.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:20, archived)

Will there be gurning?

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:38, archived)

three people will put their backs out, one set of false teeth will be forgotten in the loos, after a lot of complaints the music will be turned down as nobody can hear themselves talk, then it will be turned up again because of further complaints that they can't hear the music, everyone will be home by 10.30pm as they can't stay up till all hours like they used to do
( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:46, archived)

Sounds like my kind of knees up

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:48, archived)

sorry dear, what's that?

( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:54, archived)

Where's me cocoa?

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:58, archived)

shhh dear, you can't say things like that any more, it's all pc these days, it's like that robertson's jam, I mean what harm did it do

( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:00, archived)

Some of my best friends are coons

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:06, archived)

what's that dear, lend you some spoons? if you like dear

( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:12, archived)

I really like this response
especially as it is gospel true.
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:12, archived)

It seems very likely.
Both varieties I shouldn't wonder.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:03, archived)

nnnts nnnnts nnnnts

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:05, archived)

More prunes, dear?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:08, archived)

I know I'm old and that but I've really taken to dried figs
Soft on the teeth and useful for the digestion.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:12, archived)

Hot tub action at my sister's tomorrow.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:31, archived)

I thought you were a crusty?
Won't that untangle your fanny dreads?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:34, archived)

RELEASE THE KRAKEN

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:37, archived)

I know this bloke called Gary Cocksedge lol
He once had a do with this woman who worked a pub bar we used to lean against. He returned the next day a broken man. "Christ, man. Her fanny was like Bob Marley's head." He said in the spirit of gentlemanly conduct.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:41, archived)

my fanny holds no dread (s).
but, thanks for taking the time to think about my fanny.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 18:56, archived)

I still am
Hang on
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:00, archived)

I think you dropped this
*fwap*
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:10, archived)

I'm more of a splot man

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:17, archived)

Suddenly my kebab pizza
seems less appetising
( CowJam, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:33, archived)

WAHEY
can I just say that I approve of this sort of thing?
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 19:51, archived)

How about making bladmonkey mod of /calendar for a couple weeks? Just to see how it would work out.
See, there's me, coming up with practical solutions. How are you helping?
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:29, archived)

If we banned baldmonkey then we could make his account a mod account

( magnum, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:32, archived)

WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:33, archived)

There should be no mods, there should just be a 'ban' button next to each users name that if pressed more than three times a week, the user is banned for a week

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:36, archived)

Or, even better:
Anyone who pressed it were banned for 2 days.
( magnum, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:37, archived)

Hah
See also: 'Post a new message', 'Login' and 'I like this!' buttons
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:38, archived)

But every time the button is pressed there's a .1% chance that cr3 will go round to the presser's house and poo in their mouth.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:37, archived)

That already happens
He's been round here four times this week prising open my jaws and winging a brown one in
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:39, archived)

Four times in one week?
You'll make some folk jealous.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:42, archived)

i'm getting a couple of new rods made

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:54, archived)

hello nonces
no CP in this - you wouldn't like it: b3ta.com/newsletter/issue482/
( rob, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:04, archived)

AM I IN IT?
WHY NOT?
CAN I BE MOD NOW?
I'LL ONLY BAN SOME OF THE EVERYONE. PROMISE.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:06, archived)

ban me and I'll ban YOUR FACE
yeah...that's right
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:08, archived)

ABRACADAB-BAN!

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:14, archived)

BANGARDIUM LEVIOSARSE!

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:15, archived)

BALDMODKEY! BALDMODKEY!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:25, archived)

SQUIRTY ROBERTY

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:27, archived)

I'm boycotting the newsletter until Friz is in it again.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:49, archived)

I'm boycotting language until Friz gets his word in the dictionary.

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:00, archived)

I think you'll find that 'me' IS in the dictionary.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:11, archived)

yet again SetupBeatPuke has been overlooked
*puts foot through monitor*

*sends Rob the bill*
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:08, archived)

wasn't it in there the other week?

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:13, archived)

NO SHUT UP
I dunno, was it?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:14, archived)

it seems unlikely
alex doesn't want to submit it yet
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:15, archived)

what's Alex got to do with it...WE DONE A SONG FOR IT!
ffs
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:16, archived)

a pretty fucking dreadful song at that.
Manolith should help too next time.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:17, archived)

a pretty fucking dreadful song the best thing ever
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:18, archived)

I submitted it this week
Sad times in Alex Town, my Great Endeavour has been judged by the internet and found wanting.
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:17, archived)

it's a fucking OUTRAGE is what it is!

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:18, archived)

Nah, I understand
Rob, I understand yo, I understand.
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:20, archived)

If it's not in next weeks letter Baldmonkey should leave forever in protest

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:21, archived)

I think theoban should put it on the links board so we can all like it
and thereby justify his existence.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:26, archived)

that is a more practical suggestion

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:26, archived)

I put it on a while back
They might say glass cock to me if I do it again, they're an angry bunch
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:27, archived)

Fuck that shit.
Go on.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:31, archived)

we'll peer pressure him into putting in the newsletter

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:44, archived)

Careful, he might cancel the newsletter
Newsletter 483: CANCELLED DUE TO /TALK.
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:46, archived)

then people could read my blog instead
which DOES feature a link to your comic

everybody wins!
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:48, archived)

Maybe we should all put it on links.
Over and over.
All weekend.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:48, archived)

haha, b3ta at the weekend
that's a good one!
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:49, archived)

You "people" with your "lives" make me sick

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:53, archived)

don't worry, people only started liking jade goody or van gogh after they died

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:22, archived)

Fair enough, 6 months to go until I pop all the clogs
Then: FAME
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:24, archived)

DO YOU WANT TO MAKE A MUSIC WITH ME AND TWATS?

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:30, archived)

YEAH MAYBE

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:41, archived)

COOL
NEXT TIME WE ARE DOING ONE I'LL LET YOU KNOW
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:46, archived)

RIGHT ON

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:48, archived)

I FULLY ENDORSE THIS

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:47, archived)

WHEN SHALL WE DO ANOTHER ONE?

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:51, archived)

Anytime except this weekend is good for me
Next Saturday any good?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:00, archived)

Prolly.
I'll check when I get in.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:07, archived)

*waits patiently*

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:22, archived)

Dunno. Let's ask Robert.
ROBERT, has theoban's EXCELLENT project: setup,beat,puke been in the newsletter yet. if not why not. it is the best thing the internet ever produced
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:15, archived)

I don't think he's coming back...

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:30, archived)

this is not relevant to my interests

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:12, archived)

nor mine
i've been waiting for the child porn special edition for bloody years.
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:25, archived)

everyweek i submit my lonely hearts advert, it's never been in it

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:27, archived)

cr3 edits it out
if spangolin new you were single she's be beating your door down
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:33, archived)

i have to be careful now i'm going to be a millionaire i suppose

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:36, archived)

i wishes i am so as gud at riten as u

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:38, archived)

Wikipedia. Click on the first link not in parantheses or Italics, always leads to philosophy.
DEBUNKED.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soviet_Union
Sorry.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:29, archived)

You're a real dick sometimes.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:29, archived)

You have to keep clicking the link.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:31, archived)

I know.
This one just loops round, though.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:32, archived)

Yeah I thought I'd play it safe and just assume that you'd done it wrong before bothering to find out if you'd actually done it wrong.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:33, archived)

Oh, I see.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:32, archived)

it does it for 94.5% of the 3654457 articles
still pretty impressive
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:43, archived)

I got in the same loop from Smells Like Teen Spirit as a starting article.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:19, archived)

I'm not reading it if it doesn't feature Chris Packham in some way.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:29, archived)

RACIST

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:39, archived)

Friday again.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:18, archived)

Thanks Rob

( magnum, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:25, archived)

friday almost 3pm
work that i need to do, that needs to be done. OR. loafing about drinking coffee and surfing the web.... choices choices.
(hippospunk37 domo arigato mr roboto, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:57, archived)

Haha, yeah great.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:58, archived)

DON'T WORRY.. FATTIES!
Here's JMG!
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:59, archived)

For earlier listeners, I've been to pick my car up.. It looks tremendous.
Feel free to explode with rage.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:59, archived)

how are the windows?

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:07, archived)

IN, AND DAMN FINE!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:26, archived)

are they...
tinty?
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:43, archived)

JMG. It's time I picked a new religion.
Which faith should I follow?
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:59, archived)

BALDMONKEY

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:04, archived)

*Finger guns*

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:26, archived)

JMG
What is the best way to clean under my various folds of belly fat? I have tried bleach but the smell remains.
( executiverocker only wears C&A, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:04, archived)

Hang yourself upside down and have a chap hose you down.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:26, archived)

You're no Stubbo

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:59, archived)

about as funny as
albiongray, or whatever it was called.
(hippospunk37 domo arigato mr roboto, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:01, archived)

wow, it's like you're saying what we're all thinking!

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:59, archived)

I wish Stubbo was here, she'd tell us what to do in a dry, self depracating way.

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:01, archived)

Aww, hey.
Remember that time that Stubbo was here? Good times.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:01, archived)

I've never laughed so much in my life.
Best
Day
Ever
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:03, archived)

I wish she'd come back.
With one of her japes.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:04, archived)

I liked that one where she did that thing

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:10, archived)

HAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA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( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:04, archived)

im suffering from boredom and apathy, don't expected to be amused.

(hippospunk37 domo arigato mr roboto, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:06, archived)

Respond with threats of violence
it's the only language he understands. Oh, and Portugese.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 15:11, archived)

My girlfriend is leaving me.
She said is was due to my obsession with the 60s pop band The Monkees. I thought she was joking. And then I saw her face.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:44, archived)

hahahahaha
rnuk, girlfriend.
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:45, archived)

:(

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:53, archived)

Have you been knobbing Blue Star?

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:46, archived)

I hate sickepedia

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:48, archived)

I actually need to think of a 60's-themed costume for the weekend
I'm thinking slapping on a suit and black tie, going as one of the Beatles
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:52, archived)

Go as Ronnie Biggs
and fuck off abroad
( executiverocker only wears C&A, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:55, archived)

go as the cuban missile crisis

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:55, archived)

I thought your girlfriend broke up with you months ago. I'm pretty sure we all made fun of you. Even moohalaa.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:54, archived)

This one's a different, fictional girlfriend.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:56, archived)

There's no need for that comma, is there?

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:57, archived)

STOP PICKING ON ME
I'M SO MUCH BETTER THAN YOU
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:59, archived)

Beakering time!
'noon The LOVELY /talk! I'm on my phone at DONINGTON! So probably wo'nt reply. Have some pandering anyway. Panders. The first band I want to see arent on til 17:15. How drunk will I be by then?
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:29, archived)

National LamPOOs You're a-peein' Vacation

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:32, archived)

Hnag on no we dun this the other day soz

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:33, archived)

How about air freshener films?

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:34, archived)

GLADErs Of The Lost Ark.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:35, archived)

GLADEy and the Tramp

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:36, archived)

Every AIRWICK Way But Loose.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:39, archived)

Shake and Vac to the Future

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:42, archived)

Neutralle born killers

(wimbley is feeling hungover, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:43, archived)

FEBREEZEy Rider

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:44, archived)

Joss Stick and the Argonauts

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:45, archived)

Febreze-us Christ Superstar

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:45, archived)

BAMBI-PUR

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:48, archived)

The Love Plug(in)

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:53, archived)

The AIRWICKer Man

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:43, archived)

Incence And Sensability

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:43, archived)

fresh SEXUALLY ACTIVE glade plug-in the loop

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:44, archived)

Nope.
You've lost me there.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:45, archived)

Cambairwick Green

(wimbley is feeling hungover, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:46, archived)

i don't know what i was thinking

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:50, archived)

Practical Magic
tree
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:52, archived)

OUST of africa

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:55, archived)

I can' fucking BELIEVE I missed this thread, I'm going to kill myself
( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 16:50, archived)

Blind drunk. Is anybody decent playing today?

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:32, archived)

Children of bodom
And DANZIG!
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:36, archived)

Alter Bridge, Skindred and Danzig would be on my list. I think I saw Children Of Bodom a few years ago with Slayer.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:44, archived)

Sevendust tomorrow and Rob Zombie on Sunday.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:45, archived)

when are S-club 3 on?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:10, archived)

They'll be cleaning up the site on Monday morning.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:13, archived)

I know the drummer from Skindred
nice guy.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:15, archived)

I used to work with a woman who was at school with the singer. They're still in touch with each other.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:21, archived)

wow, between us we pretty much are Skindred
particularly because one of my mates is mates with the guitarist
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:35, archived)

HAVE A LOVELY TIME LOVELY STUJ

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:33, archived)

Ta The LOVLIEST binkybinkybinky
:D
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:39, archived)

I GOT A REPLY :D
NOW GO FORTH AND DRINK
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:41, archived)

Don't get killed

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:34, archived)

I WILL IF I FEEL LIKE!
YOU'RE NOT MY REAL MUM!
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:43, archived)

The surprise act at 8pm is Ding live on stage
Followed by Ding live on Stuj
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:48, archived)

Good lord.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:53, archived)

*gasp*
danzig is an anagram or 'a ding z'
which clearly means to sleep with ding
STUJ'S TRUE MOTIVE REVEALED
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:57, archived)

just checked the lineup
out of all them bands i'd watch two, danzig and biohazard.
(Rattlehead all time with the gay, forever touching, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:40, archived)

oh stuj
how can you bring yourself to be at a festival that lets linkin park headline?
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:44, archived)

SNOB.

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:45, archived)

i kid
i'm going to a festival that lets paolo nutini headline for christ's sake
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:50, archived)

la la la la new shoes on

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:56, archived)

i will be elsewhere watching something else, no doubt
not the band no doubt. they won't be there. which is a shame
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:57, archived)

Because GWAR!
And ROB ZOMBIE! And DANZIG! And DISTURBED! And SOAD! And TWISTED FUCKING SISTER! The LOVELY Beardo. That's why.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:53, archived)

haha, well enjoy yourself you ridiculous man

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:55, archived)

How about Shakespeare's Sister?

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:57, archived)

How about The Ray Coniff Singers?

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:12, archived)

DOOOONington
donny donny donny donny Donington!

There you go...what do you think of that then, eh?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:06, archived)

I fucking hate chuggington.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:14, archived)

O MAN I CANT WEIT TOIL THE NEW SLETTER

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:33, archived)

R U INNIT

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:35, archived)

i can't think why i would be
but you never know...
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 14:57, archived)

Pirates Of The Curried-Beans

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:32, archived)

Is this a lunch thread or a pun thread?
I'm confused.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:33, archived)

confused mediocre
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:54, archived)

Back Bacon To The Future

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:36, archived)

Baby Back Ribs To The Future 2.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:54, archived)

Twilight - Breaking Prawn

( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:37, archived)

Oh there you are

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:42, archived)

Aye just got back from meetings and shizzle
Stop whining about Rock!
( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:50, archived)

No
Have you moved jobs yet?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:54, archived)

No staying right where I am for now, I've been extended till October and have applied for the permanent position in the same role too
just really hope I get the permanent one so much.
( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:00, archived)

one flew over the coco pops

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:46, archived)

Being John Milkovich

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:46, archived)

children of the cornflakes

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:46, archived)

The Lord of the Prawn Rings

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:47, archived)

Black Pudding Down

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:48, archived)

hawaii 5-cheerios

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:48, archived)

Honey, i nut the loops!

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:49, archived)

District Lime

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:49, archived)

Bill and Ted's Eggcelent Adventure

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:50, archived)

there will be blood
oranges
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:51, archived)

the honey nutty cornflakes professor 2: the flumps

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:51, archived)

Harry Potter and the Deathly Beansprouts

( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:52, archived)

Eat

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:52, archived)

Fried Green Tomatoes

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:53, archived)

Mars Bars Attacks.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:53, archived)

made in full english

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:53, archived)

All Day Breakfast At Tiffany's

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:00, archived)

The cod and chips father: a pickled onion please two

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:53, archived)

The Woker man

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:54, archived)

Two scoops of vanilla sky

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:55, archived)

Caramelie

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:55, archived)

Every Sandwich Way But Loose.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:56, archived)

The Breakfast Club Sandwich

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:57, archived)

The Sandwich Rocks the Cradle

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:05, archived)

porridge Oats, father where art thou

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:56, archived)

For Whom The Dinner Bell Tolls

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:56, archived)

Full Metal Jacket Spuds
Food and films - this has the potential to be the longest thread ever
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:57, archived)

the lion, the wheat abix and the wardrobe

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:58, archived)

The Wheatabix Reloaded

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:59, archived)

The Lion (bar) The Twix And The Wheatos.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:03, archived)

Prince Crispian

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:04, archived)

Who Marinated Roger Rabbit

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:58, archived)

Casseroleblanca.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:58, archived)

breakfast at frosties

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:00, archived)

Weetabix bandits

( VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:01, archived)

Toast busters

( VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:01, archived)

So I Married A Gravlax Murderer

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:01, archived)

Bisto the River Kwai

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:02, archived)

The Liver Wild

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:03, archived)

Battle Royale with cheese

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:01, archived)

Curry On Camping

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:02, archived)

Kormando

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:08, archived)

Vindaloos Or Draw.
This would be great if there actually was a film called "Win, Lose Or Draw".
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:10, archived)

Ronin Josh

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:11, archived)

Puppadom Preach
by Madonna
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:14, archived)

Hunt For The Red Hot Wham Bar.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:04, archived)

The Balti-eam America: World Police

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:04, archived)

Devils on horseback Advocate

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:05, archived)

Pet Semen Tea

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:05, archived)

ewww

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:07, archived)

How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bombay Mix

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:06, archived)

The Human Centipizza

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:07, archived)

Raging Bulemia

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:09, archived)

Oregano, Basil, a pinch of Thyme and a sprinkling of Rosemary's Baby

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:10, archived)

Suspieria

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:11, archived)

Pietanic

(wimbley is feeling hungover, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:12, archived)

Pieter Deep-Pan

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:13, archived)

The Hindu version of the Donald Sutherland classic:
Don't Cook Cow.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:13, archived)

Tango and Mash

(wimbley is feeling hungover, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:13, archived)

Kung Po Panda

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:17, archived)

A Pack of Crisps Now

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:18, archived)

proper audible groan, right here

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:21, archived)

BAM! BACK OF THE NET!
I should really do some work.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:24, archived)

Black Forrest Gateux Gump.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:24, archived)

Fall Of The House Of Rashers

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:30, archived)

morning screen lickers
how's the static today?
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:08, archived)

oh it's afternoon. i must get this timing thing sorted

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:08, archived)

Tingly

( Fengol my apartment smells of rich mahogany, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:09, archived)

alright i suppose, dunno

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:11, archived)

I tried to install my Steam list over the weekend
I only got as far as 'C' before I got bored

Exciting Theoban update for you all
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:11, archived)

steam has never been popular
but i think maybe it's better than gamespy, i dunno tho. it's a resource hog, or was, i dunno. i aint online gamed for years
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:20, archived)

Never been popular?
Isn't it the biggest online gaming distribution method?
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:23, archived)

yeah but it was globally hated on introduction
and probably still is
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:23, archived)

i hate it and i don't even know what it is

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:24, archived)

precisely.

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:25, archived)

I really like it
Just so you know
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:26, archived)

well i fucking hate it, it insists upon itself as well you know

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:29, archived)

What do you suppose is going on
here?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:12, archived)

they are playing hide & seek
not very well, mind
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:19, archived)

looks totally innocent to me
but then i said that when someone had a picture like that of me where i was the chicken
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:19, archived)

oh, thanks for your kind words via gaz mw, when it is time you shall be richly rewarded

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:24, archived)

no worries sausage

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:26, archived)

i could buy us matching motorbikes, you'd have to teach me how to ride it tho, then we could go touring, my treat

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:28, archived)

great idea
where you wanna go?
(replying to this a bit late)
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:46, archived)

Hello Mortal Wombat, how are you today?
I'm on my lunch break where I'm enjoying Sushi. I have had a thing of salmon nigiri with pickled ginger (starting to like that now, hated it before), Wassabi and teyakki sauce. I have another thing of chicken katsu maki with japanese mayo and teryakki.

Are there any nice places to eat near your place of gainful employment?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:34, archived)

yes.

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 13:45, archived)

BSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
yep, still there
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:47, archived)

i switched to win 7 and it cant play animated gifs
wtf microsoft. thats the thing i hate about OSX and now you are shit too
(MarkP0rter is an annoying faggot, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:49, archived)

Haha, yeah

( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:52, archived)

This should be good.
*Pulls up a chair*
*Gets popcorn*
( Taylorcamb, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:53, archived)

where the fuck have you been?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:53, archived)

Taylorcamb
Has been away
He's back now and then
But not everyday
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:56, archived)

I fear you may have lost your touch

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:57, archived)

That's quite unkind
It's a bit much
Just because I've no fingers
I've not lost my touch oh fuck all this FUCK FUCK FUCK WEASEL SHITTING
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:59, archived)

Frankly you deserve it
for stringing us along
making us think you're talented
you LOLWAKI mong
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:09, archived)

I've been here, just lurking.
I'm like a guardian angel.
( Taylorcamb, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:59, archived)

This poem needs its last two lines STAT

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:00, archived)

While you lot have been burking
And talking about bagels.
( Taylorcamb, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:01, archived)

Taylorcamb was lurking
Watching like a hawk
all the WAKI goings on
In the merry old land of /talk
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:02, archived)

you haven't been protecting us very well
we've had a right shit batch of 'em in the past months
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:06, archived)

I didn't say I was a good guardian angel.

( Taylorcamb, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:12, archived)

i think i might go up the juicer

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:53, archived)

I don't fancy a fanny
I won't plug a pooper
Instead, I think
I'll go up the juicer
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:54, archived)

I'm 'working from home' this afternoon
I'll be in the pub in 20 mins
( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:55, archived)

i'm off work due to stuff and that

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:57, archived)

Funnily enough
I'm on the sick and it would be churlish of me not to make best use of my illness and imminent recovery.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:58, archived)

Bogus was sick
But being a man
He went to the pub
To drink babycham
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:04, archived)

Outrageous slur!

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:22, archived)

yeah yeah, babycham official

( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:24, archived)

Close one eye and waggle your head side to side
you'll achieve the same effect
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:53, archived)

I don't really care
And, I won't lie,
You are a prick,
Fuck off and die.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:53, archived)

Hahahahahhaa
tell me another!
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:54, archived)

I miss Leningrad and his "tell me again human" gifs

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:55, archived)

I'm so glad I was here, all b3tans will remember Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:49

( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:55, archived)

for fuck's sake
where the FUCK is my laptop?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:54, archived)

I've forwarded this on to Bill Gates, he should pop round your house in the next three to five working days to sort it out for you.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:54, archived)

Alright lovely JA?

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:55, archived)

alright blue star
Yeah, not bad ta. I'm still knackered and aching from walking around Disney.
( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:58, archived)

Hold up, what, you've been to Disneyland?

( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:59, archived)

Did I forget to tell you that I went to Disneyland for three nights for free? Man, I'd forget my own head if it weren't screwed on and that.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:02, archived)

Where did you stay when you were there?
Did you enjoy it? Did you go on the Terror Tower and the Aerosmith rock n rollercoaster?
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:10, archived)

We stayed at the Newport Bay. I bloody loved it. All of our food and drink was paid for and we got to stay in the park after it closed and everyone else got kicked out.
Rock n Rollercoaster was closed for the week but I've done that in florida. We did the Tower of Terror twice. The second time we did it some German bloke tried to take his seatbelt off and they had to stop the ride halfway up the tower. That was fun.
( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:18, archived)

did you ever get your randomburn?

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:56, archived)

I still haven't sent mine :(
I'm a terrible person.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:59, archived)

I still haven't received any
I'm worried that my address was wrong
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:01, archived)

just gazzed you the address i was given

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:03, archived)

One of mine has Front 242 and NIN on it.
You can have it if you like.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:09, archived)

I do like NIN, I'm not ashamed to say

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:20, archived)

erson arent
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:04, archived)

pe a
+ist
( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:06, archived)

Nope, I've only had one from binky. I dunno who else was supposed to be sending me one.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:00, archived)

FUUUUUUUUUUUU

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:02, archived)

Hello, Jack Action!
How do you do?
I heard something this morning
Tell me, is it troooooooooooooooooooooooo?
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:58, archived)

No.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:01, archived)

OH FIREMAN SAM I'VE BURNT MY TROUSERS OFF AND A BEE STANG MY LEFT BOLLOCK
NOW I CAN ONLY WALK IN CIRCLES.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:02, archived)

Yes it can

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:56, archived)

It's a good job you raised this topic
It's definitely a cause worth shouting about
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:57, archived)

What the fuck is a 'gif'
You lard bellied dunderhead
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:03, archived)

It's a thing that non-spastics can see using windows 7

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:10, archived)

I'm using windows 7
and can see gifs

quite honestly I'm so cool people should touch me.
( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:12, archived)

I can view that using windows 7
What with not being a spaz
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:16, archived)

Whooooooooooooop! CLANG! YEE HAW!
here is baldmonkey
with nothing to say.
is he a mod yet?
no. not today.

*tap dances*
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:12, archived)

How do you know if you're a mod or not?
Try and ban me, maybe it'll work
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:13, archived)

Izzy wizzy let's get busy!
BANNIOSSA!
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:18, archived)

It worked!
Fuck me, you're a mod at last
( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:19, archived)

Shit.
How do I unban him?
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:21, archived)

Just say !ysub teg s'tel yzziw yzzI

( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:22, archived)

HELLO

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:25, archived)

1. "I am going to ban you Theoban."
2. *baldmonkey waves his magic wand at theoban*
3. *theoban vomits*
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:28, archived)

That's actually what just happened too

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:29, archived)

piff paff
POOF!


you're a poof
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:20, archived)

D, D+R, R, B
HADOUK-BAN
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:20, archived)

DA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA
BANMAN
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:21, archived)

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtban

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:39, archived)

Hello baldmonkey
Why the long face?
I was second-to-last in a three-legged race
I fell into a trifle, that wasn't much fun
And my offer of sex was turned down by your mum

Never mind baldmonkey
you must stay chipper
after today, could tomorrow be shitter?
( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:21, archived)

TODAY: chinese food and fun times
TOMORROW: car tyres and hen night.

I THINK SO.
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:22, archived)

:( oh dear
( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:23, archived)

SUNDAY: hangover and babysitting :(

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:25, archived)

blimey, hen nights work fast these days
( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:25, archived)

My friend was supposed
to be coming to visit today but her little girl has chicken pox :( I have a half day so I am getting a haircut and doing baking for tomorrow. I am going Oop North tomorrow.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:27, archived)

i am very jealous of haircut and baking and oop north.
chicken pox, however, not jealous :(
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:28, archived)

Are you coming to visit me?

( jenpots, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:33, archived)

I bet you cunts won't even do a sixty mile detour for a cup of tea
:(
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:34, archived)

Chicken poxed children
Means no mates
So blue star
Stays home and waits

She does some baking
Cuts her hair
Then weeps and screams
In blobby despair
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:34, archived)

Vladdy, oh vladdy
Listen here laddy,
I feel worse than the parents
Of abductee maddy

My neck is all stiff
And my willy ain't ever
And I've not had much sleep
So I don't feel too clever

So take your "cheer up"
And fuck off to fuck
No one in the world
ever had worse luck

Than me
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:26, archived)

would you like me to buy you a sony 3d tv?

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:27, archived)

I'd like to buy for mongychops
I fancy new teevee
But I need to buy a lot of chops
So he won't get one from me

If only I were a millionaire
The first thing I would do
Is buy even more chops
And post mongy a few
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:30, archived)

cheers, i haven't eaten for a few days and dont feel too well

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:32, archived)

I'll pop a pie in the post.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:37, archived)

Silly silly Balders
You cannot post a pie!
You'll mess up the post box
and make the Postie cry

You ought to put it in a box
then whack it in the boot
then drive all the way to Mongy's house
and push it up his chute
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:44, archived)

i liked it when you rhymed 'chops' with 'chops'

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:43, archived)

USE BALDMONKEY'S ONE STEP PLAN TO SHIT POEMS...
Manolith,
You pasty faced cunt
Fuck off
You fucking cunt.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:47, archived)

i liked it when you rhymed 'cunt' with 'cunt'

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 12:01, archived)

I like this
I have to admit
It rhymes really well
It's a long way from shit
( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:31, archived)

I like the way
Your poem's tilted
By lines that get longer
Without   being    stilted

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:36, archived)

!Excellent!
( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:40, archived)

I've bought a new laptop
and I want it to arrive today. MAKE IT ARRIVE TODAY IF YOU THINK YOU'RE SO CLEVER.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:27, archived)

TELEGRAM FOR TW'ATS
Your laptop
Is crap [STOP]
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:32, archived)

:(

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:34, archived)

I so want my new laptop
so I can play with it
and record some of my music
and make Baldmonkey's look like shit

I had to buy a red one
They didn't have one in black
If it looks all girly
I'll send the fucker back
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:33, archived)

it's not so much the cherry red that makes it look quite gay
it's the wallpaper of bieber that gives the game away
so do not be embarrased, hats, now that your laptop's here
it gives you a great chance at last to hug your inner queer
( vladimir, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:35, archived)

bravo! *stands up*

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:36, archived)

stands up trouser-salutes
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:40, archived)

*half masts*

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:46, archived)

You'll never make my music
Look any shitter than it is
I've done that job already
By being a talentless prick with all fat and loser.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:45, archived)

Oh lovely little Balders
Your music's not THAT bad
You have a lot more talent
Than Miley Cyrus' Dad

Except when he sings a song
called achy braky heart
You would respond with your own composition
CHIN CATS EGGS BUM FART!
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:48, archived)

NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN
NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN
NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN
NYAN NYAN
NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN
NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:39, archived)

baldmonkey
all his troubles are wack-i
from his head down to his ballsacky
it is a mod
he wants to be

Some. how.
his music is both shit and quite catchy.
Un. like
this blatant rip off of McCartney-ey-ey-ey.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:46, archived)

Popular music only, Grry
Nobody listens to old-man music anymore
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:48, archived)

Are you Mortal Wombat's comedy account?

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:51, archived)

I thought I was yours

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:52, archived)

music stopped in 1991.
Nothing has been made since then.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:52, archived)

Until 1998
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:56, archived)

THIS IS THE NEWS!
solo1y.tumblr.com/post/6099725040

What's your favourite headline?
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:27, archived)

This one
tinyurl.com/42ov7l5
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:33, archived)

yeah, i was about to post that one
are we all following armando ianucci on twitter?
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:34, archived)

Yeah

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:40, archived)

i don't even own a twitter :(

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:40, archived)

S'probably wise
Nothing of value occurs
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:42, archived)

EXCEPT THEOBAN'S COMIC UPDATES

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:43, archived)

Back onto my updates at the moment
The comic quality drops dramatically, a starling in a tree nearby weeps
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:46, archived)

oh hush, you fool

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:26, archived)

it'd make live from the lake easier

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:43, archived)

i might buy a lake then maybe someone will want to come fishing with me

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:44, archived)

hmm
maybe you could buy some Fishing Friends^TM
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:22, archived)

shit, i missed the obvious 'fisherman's friends' joke there
can i get a do-over?
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:23, archived)

i <3 fisherman's friends.

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:28, archived)

...what?
*shuns*
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:29, archived)

Nope
Should I?
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:41, archived)

Yes.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:42, archived)

depends, do you like him?

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:43, archived)

I don't think I'm following him.

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:44, archived)

Yes
but I don't own a twitter.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:48, archived)

Then who's this?
twitter.com/#!/KinkyFlapjacks
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:51, archived)

LOLOLOL 13/f/bisexual wanna cyber?

( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:56, archived)

CTFxC FTW. SGU. SGA. ADTR. ATL

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:58, archived)

Christ almighty

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:11, archived)

I have.
I still haven't really got the hang of it.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:51, archived)

I am now
that was a comedy few minutes, ta
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:08, archived)

omg follow me! etc
twitter.com/#!/paulcnelson
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:25, archived)

HELLO be my twitter friend. twiend.
i will use it more i promise, i just have little to say at the moment.

BUT THAT DOES MEAN i wont go flooding your box. fnar fnar.
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:27, archived)

a man's on fire and they kick him in the balls?
what an absolute cock.
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:55, archived)

He was a suspected terrorist
or summink
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:59, archived)

i would bloody hope that comes second to a man's life being in danger.
justice is not meted out to people on a whim when they are vulnerable.
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:02, archived)

Careful binky, MI5 are watching, they'll have you in cuffs for sympathising with terrorists
ITS OK MR SECURITY MAN, SHE MEANS ALL BROWN PEOPLE SHOULD BE KICKED IN THE BALLS, NO NEED FOR WATER BOARDING
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:05, archived)

lockerz.com/s/109330350
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:35, archived)

MAN STINGS BEE

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:45, archived)

I liked this one from the other day
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-tayside-central-13695316
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 11:06, archived)

I've just left my car at the window tinters.
Now, while they rally it round Newcastle City Centre for 3-6 hours, who'd like to complain about JMG?
I provide a service for people upset on the internet.


No nonces.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:38, archived)

JMG, what's your opinion on the rumours that the baldmonkey for mod campaign have taken a super injunction against Sammi to prevent her going public with the story of her LOLWAKI lovechild?

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:41, archived)

This is certainly an accusation I'd be thrilled to hear more on.
I demand an undercover sting operation in to this by our fake Sheikh, 90nz0.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:42, archived)

I'd certainly like to see gonz try to spell Sheik.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:43, archived)

i dunno, man
he plays zelda
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:52, archived)

I'd like to see how you would employ Gonz in such an endeavour

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:43, archived)

it's good that you're here more during the day now
no point wasting your presence on the night owls
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:42, archived)

As peppy as those night grazers were.
You can only last so long being the emotional punchbag for a man who's sat in the house all night long, sipping shandies and building up some internet rage.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:43, archived)

did you see this recently?
www.flamewarriors.com/index.htm
some devastatingly accurate portrayals there
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:48, archived)

Most of those people have fallen out with me.
:(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:51, archived)

I've never tinted a window in my life
What tint are you going for?
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:47, archived)

tintin in the land of the soviets

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:49, archived)

come on now manolith
tint tintin joke time
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:50, archived)

*Ripple of applause*

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:51, archived)

on the tinternet

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:03, archived)

hey, for all his nonce like behavior mortal wombat is the only person who gazzed me his condolenses, perhaps his problem is he cares too much

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:50, archived)

my sweetheart m
this site is a much more beautiful place since I ignored that fuckwit, and the other fucking dullard, I totally recommend it.

until we are together again

b xxx
( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:52, archived)

dearest b, with all the money i will be soon rolling in i may well be in spain before you know it
all my love
m
xxx
( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:53, archived)

Nice one, I'll leave the 'back doors' open, if you know what I mean
looking forward to some proper window tinting my sweet

b xxx
( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:03, archived)

super, i might go on one of those round the world ticket things, do spain, portugal and greece, imagine that, cor
m
xxx
( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:17, archived)

He got upset at SSG yesterday over nothing.
I was happy as it takes the emphasis off me for a short while.
SSG is such a gentleman.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:52, archived)

Is it me or does 'window tinters' sound a bit wrong?

( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:50, archived)

'oof, right in the window tinters'

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:51, archived)

I'd be careful of him, got a touch of the 'window tinters' about him

( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:52, archived)

'if this carries on, we'll have to send in the window tinters'

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:53, archived)

Have you seen the window tinters on her?

( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:59, archived)

Yes..
As I was typing I thought it sounded weird..
But what else could they be called?
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:53, archived)

Dirty protestors.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:54, archived)

Bastards.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:54, archived)

opaquatheries

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:54, archived)

Sounds a bit Moohalaa, like..

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:55, archived)

obfuscatorats

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:55, archived)

Delucidifiers

( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:01, archived)

Hahahaha

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:57, archived)

alright, bumeyes?

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:04, archived)

Marc Almond wanted to get his car windows darkened a little bit
The woman at the garage asked him what he wanted doing with them, he answered 'Tinted, love'
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:02, archived)

OHHH LORDY!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:04, archived)

I always had him pegged as a window tinter

( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:04, archived)

man, i can't think of any wordplay jokes to do with this
there's no pun in 'tinted'
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:06, archived)

you have to be careful with wordplay
tint whatcha do, it's the way that you do it
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:10, archived)

Which was the first castle to protect its inhabitants from strong light and paparazzi?
Tintedgel
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:09, archived)

JMG, what is your reaction to the news that noit has broken his arm?

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:11, archived)

I thought he didn't have bones in his arms, just spongy blood filled tissue and valves

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:17, archived)

he broke them an' all

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:18, archived)

did he break it using those stupid leg things? i would lol at that

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:18, archived)

he did, yes

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:33, archived)

lol

( mongychops, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:38, archived)

mongychops: always delivering on promises

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:43, archived)

Anybody got any funny stories about going to the fair?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:04, archived)

Yeah, loads

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:05, archived)

Up the back of the dodgems, eh?
Disgraceful.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:08, archived)

I don't know what you've heard but I haven't got any funny stories about anything

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:08, archived)

Not that funny
on the last night of the fair, behind the big wheel generator, a boy was stabbed and his money was grabbed. The air hung heavy like a dulling whine.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:09, archived)

Hang on a minute ... I've heard this tale before.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:11, archived)

You should've stopped me
if you thought that you'd heard that one before.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:18, archived)

meat is magic!

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:00, archived)

I just posted this
www.b3ta.com/questions/fairgrounds/post1233558

You can decide for yourself, probably had to be there.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:10, archived)

You berk.
For a proper qftw entry that has to conclude with "So I did indeed foam the chinky girls face with my big brush later that very night. No apologies for length. Cheers."
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:12, archived)

I showed her my big top.
hyuk hyuk hyuk.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:13, archived)

I swung around her ring on my flying trapeze
and then shook my chair in her lion's face. If you know what I mean.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:14, archived)

I showed her who the ringmaster was!

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:15, archived)

ringmaster dwarf clown who gets dumped face first in the "bucket of foam"
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:16, archived)

She put tension on my guy-rope.
2 weeks out of 3 I've been on the QOTW popular page.

*edited.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:17, archived)

That made me chuckle lots...

( BindiBaji, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:30, archived)

He probably didn't even ram it up her pie

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:16, archived)

Who'd fuck a carnie?!

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:18, archived)

You could've had carnie knowledge of her

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:19, archived)

Soppy cunt'd just take her to the flicks and then pretend he didn't want any pie anyway
We have established recently that Maffers is a bummer and a sponge bummer at that.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:27, archived)

I refute that!
I never took anyone to the pics.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:29, archived)

Christ, you fail so hard at women
Do you want me to give it the old "My mate fancies you" thing?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:31, archived)

No, she's been busy with exams and shit and college and I can't bother my arse over it.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:33, archived)

Yeah yeah

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:35, archived)

I've got a lass who just wants some fun hovering around.
But I'll have to find a window nearby first, so I can throw my standards out of it.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:37, archived)

The problem here is that you could boff her til her eyes bleed and standards wouldn't matter
As long as no one got told. I had friend like that for years. Utter filth but I'd not want to wake up next to that face. I came undone when I left my key under her bed and she turned up at my brother's house to give me it back.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:41, archived)

She's my cousins bridesmaid tomorrow
trust me, someone would find out. lol.

She seems proper filthy though. I wouldn't mind having someone to just throw about and have some really cheap, baser instinct fulfilling sex with.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:44, archived)

Bet you end up getting pegged

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:47, archived)

And figged

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:49, archived)

and mugged, probably

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:00, archived)

By Suggs.

( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:19, archived)

Pegged?

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:49, archived)

When the lady puts on a strapon and does you up the bum
You Scottish know it as 'gowan hen, gi' me arse a good goin'
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:51, archived)

Nah, that'll never happen.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:52, archived)

It's a slippery slope, one day you're having a nice pie sandwich
The next you're tied to a tree in the middle of the park and an alsation is eating pedigree chum off your dobber while yer bird plays vivaldi's 'the four seasons' on the violin as she dances round you wearing naught but a holly wreath
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:54, archived)

You're a strange, strange man.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:58, archived)

You say that now but you'll be enjoying Tree Vivaldi Dogsex before long
And then who will be winner? I.
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:59, archived)

I've seen this happen

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:59, archived)

Yeah I hear it's pretty common in the East Riding

( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:59, archived)

National sport of Bridlington
I'm in the West
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:01, archived)

I got my first tattoo in Bridlington.
True story.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:03, archived)

I'm from the 'riding which doesn't actually exist'
Fucking South Yorkshire man, it's not even a real shire
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:03, archived)

The Halifax building society once ran an ad
Basically saying they were the top dog over "all four Ridings".
Four. Tools.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:09, archived)

I still feel quite guilty about it
I was horrible to her when she had actual feelings for me. I was a right cunt when I was younger. I wouldn't mind but I was hardly beating the fanny off with a big shitty stick. Still, she ended up marrying a bloke called Jonathan ten years her junior. How very amusing. Not then ten year, thing. The name.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:48, archived)

i don't think being fit and attractive makes being a cunt more acceptable.

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:49, archived)

You are correct
I'm very sorry :(
I hope you're not insinuating that I was ever fit or attractive? I'm too stupid at this time of day.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:56, archived)

it wasn't intended in any way as a personal comment.

( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:57, archived)

I'll come back and read this later when my brain works
Stop trying to confound me, woman!
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:00, archived)

all the cut will be absorbed by it been a dog

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:02, archived)

I had a lass called Debbie who was all in to me but had said from the word go it was just sex.
So I refused to go any further and was a bit of a dick really.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:52, archived)

I'm pretty disgusted by this no-pie action here
Maffers needs to step up his game and get his mouth around some dripping organ pie
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:29, archived)

I had some fucking pie on Friday so shut up.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:30, archived)

Yeah?
Lungs full of gravy?
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:32, archived)

I don't know what that is a euphemism for.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:34, archived)

Give you a tip man
When you've cracked open the pie and the contents are oozing out, dip a crust of bread in, s'nice.
( Theoban What of it, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:36, archived)

You lying cunt. You just said you did
It's not the same.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:32, archived)

I fucking did.
Just not from her.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:33, archived)

Lies
The ex doesn't count either
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:35, archived)

Bollocks. :/

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:36, archived)

BUSTED!

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:39, archived)

Pie is pie.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:39, archived)

hah, you went properly qotw at the end there
'the clowns all said i was really cool and a pretty lady nearly touched me!'
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:47, archived)

Yes it was deliberate.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:49, archived)

you just missed out the drugs
and the 20 clowns all piling out of a honda accord
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:56, archived)

I still wanted a serious QOTW story.
But with that little flourish.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:58, archived)

serious... qotw?
sorry, you've lost me
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:59, archived)

This time last year when then fair was in the park up the road I went to buy a bottle of wine from the offie
The delightful children of the people running the fair decided they wanted my phone. I didn't have it, but I did have a bottle of wine so I offered it to the head of the chief protagonist, this attracted a further ten or so yoofs with lumps of wood and stone. So I legged it.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:20, archived)

I once went to the fair and nearly got beat up by a couple of drunk people
And one year I got told off for swapping dodgem cars
( magnum, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:24, archived)

Mid ride?

( BindiBaji, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:27, archived)

for a ford escort?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:29, archived)

The only good thing at a fair is the dodgems.
Thats my story I went to a fair and went on the dodgems. It's funny because I went on the dodgems more than once.
( BindiBaji, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:26, archived)

I've never won a goldfish
I'd like to win a goldfish.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:40, archived)

hello.
i had goldfishes but they died of fin rot.

YAYYY.

i hear bags aren't the best habitat for a fish.
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:45, archived)

Hello binkles
I have 2 tropical fish and they are really boring.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:49, archived)

i have a cat you can borrow to liven them up*
*endeaden them
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:52, archived)

Binky, I need some advice
The gf's cat has a nice little bell on it after it became quite proficient in catching small birds and other animals. We put a bell on her and she's just catching more now :(
What do?
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:35, archived)

man, if this was the old days you'd get told to CIIJASIIE

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:41, archived)

I have no jam

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:42, archived)

then all hope is lost

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:46, archived)

i haven't ever collared and belled a cat and mine catch fuckloads of beasties.
lock it out to eat them, check it regularly for parasites and cut its claws sometimes, is what i do.
( sleepybinky, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 10:08, archived)

They die
Or like my uncle Pete's, it made a leap for freedom out of the bowl and perished in a ball of deadly fluff behind the radiogram. Picture for illustrative purposes only for younger readers.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:45, archived)

what was life like during the first world war?

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:58, archived)

Fast legs

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:03, archived)

When's your birthday?
Tell cr3 to set up a tombola stall or throw some hoops over poles to win your birthday presents.
One of them could be a fish in a bowl, and a cuddly toy of course. Which he can pin to the roof for realism.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:48, archived)

Needs more Elvis mirror

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:50, archived)

i like the idea of this but it doesn't look like it'd be fun for a fish to live in
www.find-me-a-gift.co.uk/pet-gifts-space-wall-fish-tanks.html
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:51, archived)

I won a goldfish a couple of times, but I've never been in the big freezer at McDonalds.
The lord givith and the lord takith away.
( G/PP &#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:57, archived)

it's not too late, gonz
get a job there and you can go in it WHENEVER YOU LIKE
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:59, archived)

Nope

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:05, archived)

I told this Yorkshire bint to knit me a cambric shirt
without no seam nor needlework. And did she? Did she fuck as like.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:10, archived)

Something about Clowns touching kids
Morning oh christ I feel like battered shit X(
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 9:19, archived)

How can we create cross-board harmony, peace and love?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 5:54, archived)

how about a free bar?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 6:04, archived)

Ban all nonces!

( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 6:16, archived)

there would be no-one left

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 6:20, archived)

what utter
nonce sense.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 6:20, archived)

Sad but possibly true, certainly on QOTW

( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 6:20, archived)

Eugenics
Obviously.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 6:20, archived)

if you mean changing everyone's username to Eugene
It might just work...
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Fri 10 Jun 2011, 6:45, archived)

Ban everyone.

( Zuowan, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 6:51, archived)

Presumably in Alphabetical order?

( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 7:00, archived)

Fat people sexathons

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 7:11, archived)

Blitzkreig.
Followed by genocide. Any we allow to survive will love us. OR ELSE.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:03, archived)

Delete qftw, links and talk.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 8:05, archived)

Best way to avoid going for a piss?

( executiverocker only wears C&A, Fri 10 Jun 2011, 1:21, archived)