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Anyone want to play Dr Frankenstein?

Interactive Web2.0 futuristic version of the old draw a body part, fold it over, someone draws the next bit game.
See if we can arrange ourselves in to 4s, someone reply calling "HEAD", someone reply saying "BODY", someone reply to that saying "LEGS" and then someone "FEET".
Then Head draws on the template below, gaz's that to the next person and so on until the character is drawn, then at the end of lunch we post the results.
You don't have to stick to the guide lines, they were put in when I was thinking of doing it "blind" and shopping together later.
Although keeping to them means someone could then shuffle the parts if they had the time and inclination
Take part in as many as you like, but do try and fulfill your commitments :)
Could be stupid fun or it could not work. anyone want to waste 10 minutes finding out?

Almost blank source image with guides s1.b3ta.com/host/creative/46786/1242384516/DrawingTimeBlank.gif

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:55, archived)

HEAD

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:55, archived)

FEET

win, we have a complete person. Step on it Mr Toast

(

Dr Scunner She’s a he, technically, but she’s scalding hot, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:56, archived)

bah, body

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:56, archived)

LEGS FTW

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:57, archived)

bring it on!!1!

/excuse to avoid doing work

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:58, archived)

have sent it, pass it on to twig when done, then twig send to Dr Scunner

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:59, archived)

ah shit I can't

at work and I've not even got MS Paint, you'll need another Leg man

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:01, archived)

so why say? you nobber

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:02, archived)

wanted to be in the cool gang

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:07, archived)

you'r always welcome, you could use paint.net or one of the online editors

like sumo www.sumopaint.com/web/

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:10, archived)

shotgun!

(

The Coast Of Yemen, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:04, archived)

So me head, k3b/-\b body, you legs, Scunner feet

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:06, archived)

passed on.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 12:16, archived)

ditto

(

The Coast Of Yemen, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:24, archived)

same here (again)

shall we say 1pm whoever has both final images?

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:36, archived)

i have one of the final images...

(

Dr Scunner She’s a he, technically, but she’s scalding hot, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:40, archived)

you start the thread then :)

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:41, archived)

wait till 1?

(

Dr Scunner She’s a he, technically, but she’s scalding hot, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:41, archived)

gives the other one time

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:46, archived)

silly Twig and your legs of doom

(

Dr Scunner She’s a he, technically, but she’s scalding hot, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:06, archived)

GENITALS

(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:59, archived)

SHOULDERS!

(

SubCulture Hero ... ... He... .... Comes ... ...., Fri 15 May 2009, 12:57, archived)

feet

ed: oops.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:56, archived)

BODY

(

op op op op op I stink therfore I spam, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:56, archived)

HEAD

(sent)

(

The Coast Of Yemen, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:59, archived)

LEGS

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:03, archived)

edit: claim removed.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 12:16, archived)

FEET then :)

~~Bah: you take it k3b.~~

(

zoldergoose, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:17, archived)

nah nah, I've already done one, it's yours.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 12:19, archived)

Mmmkay.

(

zoldergoose, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:19, archived)

SHOULDERS

(

The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:01, archived)

KNEES

(

The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:01, archived)

AND.

(

prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:02, archived)

TOES

(

The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:01, archived)

KNEES

(

The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:01, archived)

AND

(

prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:01, archived)

hahaha :)

Wasn't 'it' AWESOME!!!
/The statue is of Taweret = patron of childbirth and protector of women and children. Perhaps after is was 'destroyed' that's when the pregnancy problems started...

(

The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:02, archived)

bad bad man

and eyes and ears and mouth and nose.

(waxdart hello., Fri 15 May 2009, 12:02, archived)

(

The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:04, archived)

Hurrahs!!

This pikchewers makes me *glee* all over. :D

(

kitaro is all, like, "Nifty Biscuits" 'n that..., Fri 15 May 2009, 12:07, archived)

I still love this more than life itself.

(

An Eagle in Your Mind, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:07, archived)

yes..yes it was :D

Vincent!! ^_^

(

prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:03, archived)

I'm still getting over pretend Locke. Locke-alike.

(

zoldergoose, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:20, archived)

TOES

(

The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:01, archived)

Sorry ;) nice idea :)

(

The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:01, archived)

Is this going to be like weird science?

Do we have to wear bras on our head?

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:06, archived)

hahaha, not if you don't want to

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:12, archived)

this is a good idea

is no-one actually doing it?

(

drbroon abloooobloobloo, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:28, archived)

Something about shepherding cats

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:37, archived)

two of them are being done with the aim of posting at 1pm

Do you want to call Head on another one?
We could do it between us if you feel that way inclined

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:38, archived)

Silly man. Won't even TRY to make it to the bathroom.

No more alliteration until monday! HA!

Going out of town for the weekend.

(AimlessMess wants to be an archeological conundrum someday., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:54, archived)

Wow.

These are a few of my favourite things.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:56, archived)

hahah

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 12:20, archived)

swine wars

(

Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:50, archived)

mmmm... peppered ham

The crackling is strong in this one

Ham Solo?

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:52, archived)

mmmmmmmm

soooooooo hungry :)

(

Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:54, archived)

me too

I having a barbie tomorrow and I can't stop thinking about all the lovely animal flesh I'm gonna be experimenting with

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:56, archived)

damn you

(

Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:58, archived)

barbie?

does Ken know?

(

harribobs invented christmas on, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:50, archived)

Shit, if that is Pepper Pig, who have I been fucking :S

That is woo, t-shirt it NOW!

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:52, archived)

hehehe

i think there maybe copyright issues :)

(

Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:55, archived)

just fuck them, then they wont care :)

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:56, archived)

hehee

yeah good idea :)

(

Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:58, archived)

*applauds*

*clicks*

(

J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:54, archived)

thank you sir!

(

Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:55, archived)

:( this is a sad defilement of one of the sexiest actresses in sifi.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:55, archived)

peppa

isnt that sexy ;)

(

Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:56, archived)

I photoshopped my band, now I know you normally rape people who don't post a recogniseable face or something funny..but it took me ages and I thought you might appreciate it..could be massively wrong, in which case I will delete the thread if it offends

(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:48, archived)

It took you ages and still looks shit

(I'm supposed to be harsh in these situations, right?) :D

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:50, archived)

Some times the truth has to hurt

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:51, archived)

hehe :D somethin like that..

(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:52, archived)

I tried doing something similar and it's fucking hard.

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:53, archived)

yep.. 2 days of tinkering.. in the end you just have to say bollocks to it..that'll have to do.

(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:58, archived)

Tony Blair

is the singer in your band?

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:50, archived)

Tony Blair??

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:50, archived)

ex-Prime Minister

he was pretty famous

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:52, archived)

*slap*

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:52, archived)

*tickles*

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:58, archived)

WA-HAY.. you can't beat a bit of slap and tickle..

(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 15 May 2009, 12:00, archived)

~~famous~~ shameless

(

J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:53, archived)

He now wears a tin foil hat, so he can only hear god talking to him

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:53, archived)

lol

(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:55, archived)

*rapes the redex, boredly*

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:50, archived)

At least put some effort into it !!

huh..can't even be raped properly... what's the world coming to..

(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:54, archived)

Faceless people are fine as long as they are nice

(

Dr Scunner She’s a he, technically, but she’s scalding hot, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:53, archived)

ab-sailing for the win

(

op op op op op I stink therfore I spam, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:39, archived)

Schweaty Absch

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:41, archived)

Woo

nice wash

(

edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:41, archived)

jizzyacht

sweet

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:42, archived)

Oh nose, she is too thin, you will see the end of your knob when you shag her

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:44, archived)

i know that source

source

(

Dances with Rabbits Back to Education i go, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:45, archived)

as IF!!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:47, archived)

FUCK!

First time in months. Did they not take that down?

(

Dr Scunner She’s a he, technically, but she’s scalding hot, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:54, archived)

they did, look at the adress

(

Dances with Rabbits Back to Education i go, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:55, archived)

ok thats 9 times now

you git

(

op op op op op I stink therfore I spam, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:55, archived)

sorry

(

Dances with Rabbits Back to Education i go, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:56, archived)

Stay away from the Bermuda Triangle

You might never be seen again

(

CanonCaliber A big bore, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:48, archived)

but what a way to go

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:49, archived)

punarific.

Have another torso landscape

yes it's safe for work, no it doesn't look like porn from any distance

(

Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:05, archived)

Ooerr...

(

Ninj, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:32, archived)

OMG

Dotluigi Collina?

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:33, archived)

sexy

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:34, archived)

Imagine your jizz running off that bald head :)

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:34, archived)

I think it would soak right in

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:35, archived)

only a little bit :)

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:36, archived)

does the baldness beong to that

referee?

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:36, archived)

Ah yes, could be

Freaky McFreak

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:37, archived)

I don't know who the original source was (AND I DON'T MEAN DOT, COMEDIANS IN THE WINGS :D)

But he appears to be made entirely of foreskins.

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:37, archived)

that means they can heal quickly

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:38, archived)

really?

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:39, archived)

the skin on your knob, regrows very quickly

I think a small bit of the skin can produce enough skin in a week or so to cover a football pitch. They would use it for skin grafts but it is to delicate

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:43, archived)

Football pitch in a week? You sure about that, or are you just showing off again? :D

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:47, archived)

Nope, it really does regrown quickly

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:48, archived)

Awesome!

*Chops off foreskin*
*waits*
*waits*
*waits*
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:51, archived)

Rub him and see if he turns into a Space Hopper!

(

..wil, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:40, archived)

Space hoppers just make me think of monkey dust :)

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:45, archived)

Comedians in the Wings

the less successful sequel to Gorillas in the Mist

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:41, archived)

haha

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:41, archived)

Collect them all ladies

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:47, archived)

hahahaha

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:48, archived)

might help cheer them up

they could make jokes appear when they got wet

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:51, archived)

OM NYOM NYOM NYOM NYOM

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:54, archived)

fuck me!

needs more Dan Dare!

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:43, archived)

7 Shape ... And it's good-bye from him

7-Shape Vector Ronnie Corbett (T-shirt, Poster)
-
If you want to be immortalised in this same way and be part of my project,
then just go to this page here. It tells you about the project and how you
can send me a picture and be vectored. Also you can suggest famous
people that you might want to see.
-
View All My 7-Shape Faces Famous & B3tan
-

(Logovend is doing arts and farts!, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:20, archived)

Ace fella!

As always!

(

Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:20, archived)

most excellent

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:20, archived)

fucking awesome

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:21, archived)

FUCKING

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:22, archived)

AWESOME

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:22, archived)

*materialises behind you*

How awesome?

*vanishes again*

(

J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:50, archived)

legend.

What a way to brighten a morning!

(malvino warning profile may cause death an brain damage, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:21, archived)

cor, that is very good

he looks rather serious

any font geeks know what this font is called? I recognise it but can't think of its name

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:22, archived)

Try

new.myfonts.com/WhatTheFont/

(Logovend is doing arts and farts!, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:22, archived)

got it now

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:36, archived)

fab stuff. :)

(

prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:22, archived)

Superb!

*waits patiently trying not to fidget*

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:24, archived)

Top Shape

(

Letum Your Ad here £2.40, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:24, archived)

That's very dignified.

Now give us some Hazel Blears (and no, I won't be buying it).

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:24, archived)

Head

on a stick maybe

(Logovend is doing arts and farts!, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:25, archived)

Plus ...

I think Wilf Lunn is next

(Logovend is doing arts and farts!, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:26, archived)

Ooh! great!

He's a mentil!
Yippee!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:28, archived)

Good grief!

You and your sex criminals.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:30, archived)

Fantastic :D

Ace, brill, fabbo etc

(

i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:24, archived)

Ace as ever!

(

..wil, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:26, archived)

Beautiful as usual

(

ArghZombies No longer has a Leaky QUIM, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:29, archived)

wow

fantastic as usual

can't afford the t-shirts though :(

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:31, archived)

That is wondeful :D

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:31, archived)

Really quite marvellous!!

(

Ninj, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:33, archived)

*wrinkles nose, adjusts glasses, stares into camera*

Well, the producer would like to say he clicked this, but he's unavailable. Actually he's locked in the closet. I keep telling him that he should come out, but will he listen?

*polite studio laughter*

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:39, archived)

Lovely!

it would be REALLY nice to see this and the other Ronnie together on a T shirt...

/one guaranteed sale right here

(

The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:08, archived)

Yes

have you already done the Barker?
if so, can i have a linky plz

(

Barry the Time Sprout one of your 5-a-day, Fri 15 May 2009, 13:59, archived)

An extension of last week's Happy Friday Song

284 different frames - 15 hours work - enjoy it!
and have a great weekend

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:59, archived)

this needs a tune!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:01, archived)

Your wish is my command....

www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJnKVH6V7kw

(

Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:03, archived)

haha

that IS DTH

also - have this: www.youtube.com/watch?v=BN4cLlIKnoA

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:16, archived)

It has a tune . . .

tune

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:03, archived)

ahhhhh

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:04, archived)

91729.92 - You've topped the leader board :D

Once you're on the popular page

(

Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:07, archived)

Whass this?

Is there a crappypaintmashanimation category?
hehehe!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:11, archived)

's on my profile

Just being silleh

(

Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:21, archived)

THIS IS MADNESS OF THE HIGHEST ORDER

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:01, archived)

you're nuts.

I like you.

(malvino warning profile may cause death an brain damage, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:02, archived)

grooming Dave could have

unintended results

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:03, archived)

tribe of lost pigmys

living in his back hair?

(malvino warning profile may cause death an brain damage, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:21, archived)

now you're living in a fantasy world man

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:26, archived)

Universally agreed.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:04, archived)

ey oop, beardy!

beardy!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:12, archived)

The beard has to go over the weekend, Dave, I'm afraid.

Circumstances are forcing me to look attractive again.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:17, archived)

oh . . . err . . . good luck with that

*passes bag* C];0p
hehehe!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:29, archived)

*wants to listen to Al Stewart again*

Super mega woo Davey boy!

(

Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:02, archived)

hahah does this have a well known tune that i can sing along to?

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:02, archived)

Nah!

www.b3ta.com/board/9448915
hehehe!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:03, archived)

oh i see.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:22, archived)

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:05, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZThquH5t0ow

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:18, archived)

chokka ummah mow mow

chokka uhm mow mowmow

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:20, archived)

rice pud, very good what's it all about?

WOO YAY HOUPLA!

And

PANOWIE!

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:02, archived)

I have Professor Percival singing this with

Bob Kerr's Whoopee band

squeeeeeeeee!
Acers!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:04, archived)

it's Bob Kerr's version I have in my head

from 1988.

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:05, archived)

Thass prolly it

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:06, archived)

he's not a real professor

I've seen his academic roll!

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:08, archived)

*Chinese burns*

YOU TAKE THAT BACK!
He's married to the Mighty Atom!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:16, archived)

\o/ woo!

I've got a tune in my head that fits this perfectly, but I have no idea where it came from. Does that make me a genius?

(

i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:04, archived)

amazing as ever :D

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:04, archived)

That is so good.

I love it!

(

The Togaboy The world will end on, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:07, archived)

is there any way that this could be submitted

for some sort of short animated film prize?

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:08, archived)

hmmm

maybe we should have the b3ta oscars...

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:09, archived)

I think this place needs

MORE self congratulation and ego massaging...

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:10, archived)

great idea !!

well done you!!

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:19, archived)

Admit it...

... you're really the ghost of Ronnie Barker, aren't you.

Clickerty-woo!

(

Ugi , it's a game of give and cake, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:09, archived)

absolutely top class

truly a wonderful creation Dave!!!

multiple woos and clicks!!

(

harribobs invented christmas on, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:09, archived)

Blimey!

Thank you Dave!
I had rice pud yesterday - it was beezer!

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:10, archived)

In the old beezer in Cairo?

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:11, archived)

Pharoah nuff!

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:14, archived)

I denile this

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:16, archived)

Tomb much puns!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:16, archived)

help! mummy!

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:17, archived)

What a dreadful pun!

*tuts*

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:24, archived)

I don't care what you sphinx

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:25, archived)

If you pyramid the threads

you'll find some awful puns
hee hee!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:30, archived)

Aspose so

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:31, archived)

*goes to play Horus goes skiing*

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:41, archived)

The Queen takes her staff skiing every year

Hurghada very grateful

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:46, archived)

*looks o'er*

I THOUGHT THIS WAS REALLY FUNNY IF I DO SAY SO MYSELF AND YOU'VE ALL IGNORED IT. SOB.

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:34, archived)

YAY!

I demand presents.

(

fannycradock, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:13, archived)

my doughnuts turned out like fanny's!

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:19, archived)

Woohoo!!

(

crazyjude is very happy with happytoast and his skill, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:16, archived)

What-ho!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:17, archived)

*huggles*

i will let you know about the wedding in due course. music is failing us a bit at the moment...

(

crazyjude is very happy with happytoast and his skill, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:21, archived)

Bah!

Sorry hun!
D'OH!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:26, archived)

hahahaha dear lord!

'clicky woos'

(

McBadger COW, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:19, archived)

bloody hell

brilliant

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:20, archived)

i've always loved this song :)

much glee
have another click

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:24, archived)

Awesome

I keep singing it in tune with that Italian Opera though. Don't know what it's called, but there is a bit in it with lots of people singing:

"LAAA LA, LAAAA LA, LA-LA LA-LA LAAAAAAAAA
LAAA LA, LAAAA LA, LA-LA LA-LA LAAAAAAAAA"*

*Please substitute the lalas with opera-style words.

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:43, archived)

..........Awesome

I'm still watching it, and I'm sure I haven't noticed everything yet.
Nice errm.... multi-coloured halogen uplighters? :-J Detail on the keks, urrgghh. And Aunt Fanny's present...?
Fank-ooo Dave! Have a great weekend yersel'!

(

Bee Nice |-|, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:04, archived)

Dark girls, fair girls . . .

fair girls . . .some with ginger . . . pubes?
hee hee!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:09, archived)

hahahahahahahahaha

That's brilliant!

(

giant_squid, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:30, archived)

This is utterly brilliant

I can't wait to get home, put on the tune and sing along.

I am a bit dismayed this isn't on the popular page. So many woos and so few clickings in this thread.

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:44, archived)

lovely, Dave

(

Milkman Dan, Sun 17 May 2009, 17:32, archived)

FORE!

Click for big

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:54, archived)

FIVE!

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:55, archived)

SKIN

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:55, archived)

oh fucking YES!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:55, archived)

fanta - please meet stick

now shag for our entertainment!

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:56, archived)

Oops!

(Cakie Rose from the dead on, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:56, archived)

I think he meant to do it

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:57, archived)

Oh,

that's all right then.

Carry on. :)

(Cakie Rose from the dead on, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:01, archived)

Ouch!

That's gonna sting!

(

..wil, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:57, archived)

bah, some TCP and some plasters and he'll be fine.

heheheh, utterly brilliant!

(

theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:58, archived)

Come on people.

Do more stuff. Faster! Keep me entertained while I sit through this show for the 41st time.

(

The Togaboy The world will end on, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:01, archived)

Top stuff as evar

Thanks for posting it just before mine . . . C];0)

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:02, archived)

YES!

Todays wallpaper sorted :D

(

Frogbeat, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:02, archived)

swoosh!

Very nice :D

(

i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:07, archived)

Sweeeeeeeeeeeeet

(

Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:08, archived)

Wonderous

Love the tiny exclamation. I feel I might experience a somewhat greater degree of dischuffedness in the circumstances.

(

Ugi , it's a game of give and cake, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:19, archived)

strider!

(

op op op op op I stink therfore I spam, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:20, archived)

I guess he had to split!

HAHAHAHAHAHA

:(

:D

(

discomeats This canoe, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:25, archived)

Now that I like!

(

Letum Your Ad here £2.40, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:27, archived)

Wow!

(

Bee Nice |-|, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:27, archived)

Fatality.

(

Throat And Ice Pie I see dem tatties dere., Fri 15 May 2009, 12:44, archived)

Yummy!

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:38, archived)

mmm. poopaste

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:38, archived)

Mr h!

What are you up to these days? Still working in the vicinity of Mordor (as I call it)?

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:48, archived)

I am currently enjoying a day off, Mr Le Tramp.

But I do indeed still work there.

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:49, archived)

I'm going back there on Monday after 2 months off sick.

Dreading it.

But I'm glad my "talents" allow me such a fucking colossal amount of leeway.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:56, archived)

this is appealingly disgusting

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:39, archived)

Chicken Jalfrezi and a bottle of Merlot

produces the same product

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:39, archived)

er - no thanks

I like chocolate - a lot

but this might put me off

for 5 minutes

Ning Barbie - how's you?

(

bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:39, archived)

ningling.

I'm OK, gotta get back to work tho' :(

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:40, archived)

are you back with us

or is this a less fleeting visit?

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:43, archived)

damn - I scared him away by

looking directly at him

:(

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:49, archived)

What powers you have, sir

*vanishes into ether*

(

J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:52, archived)

*sprins around*

*narrows eyes*

he's fucking gone again too...

*backs himself into a corner, sits cross legged and alert*

lets see them creep up on me now!

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:53, archived)

don't leeeeeeeeeeeave us grunty

there are weirdos on here

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:53, archived)

Don't confused powers with what is simply a bad smell.

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:53, archived)

Hey!

*sniffs* that's obsession for goats!

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:57, archived)

This paste taste like shit

(

Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:39, archived)

I am confused... craving it, yet repelled by it at the same time.

You should be a dietician, Babs :D

(

i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:42, archived)

I probably should!

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:43, archived)

it says it's chocolate but it looks like poo

hmmm....

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:43, archived)

We've just been involved in toilet-training my little girl.

Whenever she successfully pooed in the toilet we gave her a chocolate as a treat.

The irony was not lost on me.

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:45, archived)

and what did you give her when she successfully pooed in her pants?

Or behind the sofa?
Or on a grandparent?

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:46, archived)

A stern look

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:46, archived)

And what does that achieve?

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:48, archived)

Well, eventually it worked.

Eventually.

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:49, archived)

More poo, depending on the sterness of the look.

(

i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:50, archived)

what's a jarvis?

and why are you having it right fucked?

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:51, archived)

because left fucking is just perverse

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:52, archived)

It's rhyming slang - Jarvis Cocker = Shocker.

My dad's in a bad way, on life support in intensive care. Not very nice :(

(

i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:55, archived)

ah fuck that's not cool :(

best of luck.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:57, archived)

ta :)

(

i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:03, archived)

*hugs*

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:59, archived)

also ta :)

(

i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:03, archived)

*more better hugs*

I hope he's okay again soon

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:04, archived)

It was actually the chocolate that produced more poo.

"Daddy can I have a chocolate?"

"No, it's nearly tea time"

"I'm going to do a poo in the toilet".

*toilet flushes*

"Now can I have a chocolate?"

kids, eh. They're not stupid.

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:52, archived)

You should make her fish the poo out of the toilet and show you

before you give her a chocolate. This will soon encourage good hygiene.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:55, archived)

I had to tell her to stop doing that, actually.

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:58, archived)

I'll stick with red wine and coffee thanks

... and my pipe

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:42, archived)

The less said about your pipe the better

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:43, archived)

it's a magnificent pipe thanks you very much

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:44, archived)

I've got a pipe.

I think it's lovely.

WHO'D LIKE TO HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THIS OPINION?

Fuck sake. /Talk, /board, all the same. Bunch of fuckless cunts. Not you, Prof.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:45, archived)

fine, if that's how it is

I unaward your day off, and I'll sit here crying into my pint.

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:46, archived)

Not you either.

I'm going to get out of here before I start getting worse.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:47, archived)

/talk is best avoided

so is Taking It Seriously. Online. *hugs*

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:49, archived)

If only I were as fantastic as you.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:49, archived)

sarcasm is the lowest .... oh wait

thank you

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:51, archived)

I'd love to smoke pipes with you one day

that sounds like a great deal of fun

whooopie

*dances*

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:48, archived)

Objection!

(

Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:48, archived)

I object to this objection

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:50, archived)

I like a pipe

when I was a kid I stuffed putty in all my dad's pipes

he wasn't very happy, but it stopped him smoking

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:49, archived)

I love pipes and cigars

I'm less keen on cigarettes... but I have been known to sport a pack or 3 on my person.

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:52, archived)

mmmmm delicously nutty.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:45, archived)

*bokes a little*

The idea is great.
The resultant product is less appealing

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:49, archived)

Two girls one tube

(Cakie Rose from the dead on, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:56, archived)

hahahahha! Mmmmmmmmm... chocolatey!

(

theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:59, archived)

Choccy toothpaste exists, apparently :)

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:36, archived)

I thought it did

how horrible.

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 12:26, archived)

(

bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:34, archived)

I can mike them up, I can.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:35, archived)

The brewery?

(

Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:35, archived)

Clang clang clang tshhhhhhhhhtshhhhhh clang bubble bubble.

No, the drums you pillock.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:35, archived)

indeed

I can drink them

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:35, archived)

I haven't had a can of Shandy Bass in years.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:36, archived)

me neither

I can't remember last time I may have had a pint of Bass. But I expect it has happened.

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:37, archived)

I don't think I ever have.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:37, archived)

Never had Carling or Worthington?

(

Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:38, archived)

I think I've had Carling.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:39, archived)

I'm sure they used to be owned by Bass

(

Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:40, archived)

It's very very sweet

and nothing like beer

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:38, archived)

Just like me.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:39, archived)

*body, head etc*

/rubbish euphamism concatenation club

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:41, archived)

hahaha

10/10 for succinctness

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:42, archived)

make mine a double

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:37, archived)

I went off Bass for years after having about 8 pints of it vomitted up all over me

I am though, glad to say, back in business with the old beast

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:37, archived)

even after she was sick on you?

you're such a gentleman

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:38, archived)

*office LOLs*

yer bastard

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:41, archived)

when I was about 16 - I got off with the girl of my dreams in a nightclub

while full on snogging she puked up Pernod and blackcurrant all over my white silk shirt (IT WAS THE 80S - FUCK OFF)

She rushed off and went home and she was too embarrassed to ever talk to me again. She could have pooped in my mouth and I would still have crawled naked over broken glass just to wank on her shadow. :(

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:42, archived)

you seem to have a number of puking stories

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:44, archived)

very few of which involve me doing the puking

I do have a story about someone shitting in a kettle at a party and then switching it on

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:45, archived)

that does not sound like a good idea

it sounds like a bad idea

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:55, archived)

I wouldn't recommend it

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:56, archived)

voids the warrenty?

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:00, archived)

Argos weren't happy

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:03, archived)

how low can you go?

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:38, archived)

Boom boom!

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:41, archived)

Never tried it.

Drumming, that is. Or Bass, now I think of it. I lead a sheltered life :(

(

i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:41, archived)

you should drum while drinking Bass

do it DOOOOO IIIIIIIIIT

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:42, archived)

you could smoke Drum while drinking Bass

but you'd have to take your pint outside

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:44, archived)

drumming is fun

you can pretend you're twelve

then have fish fingers

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:42, archived)

The new pen - never runs out

click if you need.

(Redbull_(UK) pfffft, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:31, archived)

Breaking news:

Students all over the country collapse over their dissertation drafts. Redbull unavailable for comment, the wanker.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:32, archived)

A -

see me after class

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:33, archived)

it also does incredibly neat writing

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:33, archived)

I use a red pen for marking assignments (for which I get paid)

It is known as the red pen of unhappiness and frustration.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:34, archived)

Too aggressive!!!!!

You'll make students cry

www.news.com.au/story/0,27574,24745013-421,00.html

(

Cassius Kray floats like a butterfly, stings like a trout, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:39, archived)

That doesn't apply to me, I'm in NSW.

Thus the shit that is dished up to be will continued to be returned with passive aggressive comments written IN RED!!!!!!!!!!!

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:45, archived)

I like this!

Who-ever's it is...

(

..wil, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:34, archived)

just click it

it takes you straight to the source

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:46, archived)

you'd faint after a pint and a bit

so it'd never run out but you'd never be able to finish a novel

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:35, archived)

That's nearly an armful!

(

..wil, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:37, archived)

what have a I got to do with a sick pig in Cheltenham?

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:37, archived)

Crikey!

Nice idea, nicely shopped.

weirdo

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:39, archived)

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:46, archived)

Hi Redbull

This board is for people who do their own photoshops, not simply link to other people's work

If you are in fact Daniel Goodchild, then please accept my apologies and have a million Woos

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:47, archived)

i direct you to redbull's profile...

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:54, archived)

In that case

A Million Woos are yours Mr Redbull!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:55, archived)

yes,

i am :)

(Redbull_(UK) pfffft, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:58, archived)

Hurrah!

I shall check profiles from now on!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 11:01, archived)

Praise the lord

(DJTK, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:30, archived)

BAD POPE

he has a duck for a hat

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:31, archived)

I mitre have to steal it off him

because I'm a crook!
heehee!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:32, archived)

I should give you some stick for that

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:33, archived)

I see what you did there

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:34, archived)

I AM INCENSED BY THIS

Mrrrrr

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:34, archived)

Steal? How wicked!

You should buy it - he takes Papal

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:34, archived)

Well, seeing as this hasn't happened to me, I refuse to praise the lord.

(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:32, archived)

because I'm a daft knobber

that looks to me like he's leering after something past her off screen.

Also she shouldn't play with that string too much!

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:32, archived)

LEAVE HER ALONE!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:33, archived)

I'd be leering at something else. Anything else.

She's got that Jennifer Ellison 'half little girl, half terrier' thing going on.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:33, archived)

How did your arse handing go?

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:36, archived)

I got stroppy and fixed it (it was a hit and hope, and it worked)

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:36, archived)

yes us men hate those obviously attractive girls

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:36, archived)

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:38, archived)

She's not my type. I'm so sorry that offends you.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:39, archived)

I'm with you poppet

*skips*

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:37, archived)

EARTHSHAKIN' BEACHPOPE!

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:33, archived)

some things are unforgivable... i know

(

op op op op op I stink therfore I spam, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:11, archived)

gahhhhhhhhhhhh

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:13, archived)

That's really rather quite bad, Sir.

(

Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:13, archived)

hahahahahaha

Stan, I was listening to darren Gough on the radio last night, and all i could see was your face!

*stalks*

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:17, archived)

Well, if you put loads of posters of me on your wall

it's bound to happen!!

(

Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:20, archived)

is it just me, or does the board move a lot slower in the daytime than it used to?

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:23, archived)

It's Friday - got to finish w*rk

Plus I think I for one peaked too soon yesterday with the early newsletter.
*mops*

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:27, archived)

finish w*rk?

everyone should have the day off like me! I award you all a day off!

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:29, archived)

There'll be a Happy Friday song in about half an hour

gleeeeeeeee!
Spread the LURVE!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:29, archived)

hurrah!

my boss is actually allowing us to leave when all our work's done today.
He's thinking about 4.30 I expect. I could go now. But there's barbecue for lunch.

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:31, archived)

from where?

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:35, archived)

What!?

From my brilliant mind of course!
tee hee!

(

Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:42, archived)

fucking w*rk...

I'm in the wierd position of being ahead of schedule on some w*rk, so I'm gonna have to slow it down, so I don't get given more to do

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:38, archived)

Lots of work to do.

*looks at it*

Fuck off, work.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:28, archived)

I award you a day off immediately.

Grab your gear, I'll see you at the pub.

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:29, archived)

Ooooh I wish.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:31, archived)

mine keeps chasing me

... and breeding.

:(

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:30, archived)

Mine too, but it can get tae fuck.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:32, archived)

I love this. LOVE IT.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:17, archived)

whatever floats your boat!

(

op op op op op I stink therfore I spam, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:23, archived)

This sort of shit, sir.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:25, archived)

hahahah, you loon, time for a spanging!

edit: TJ- is it my imagination or does b3ta keep getting very slow/jamming up?

(

theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:17, archived)

I approve of this silliness

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:17, archived)

ooomph

(

i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:17, archived)

there it is!

... sorry - I'll get my coat

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:30, archived)

gwan then as its friday

woo!

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:19, archived)

I must hurt you now

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:25, archived)

look at that CAPS size!

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:27, archived)

please join the queue for the hurtings

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:29, archived)

You'd sink he'd know better

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:33, archived)

*fires up the hurt-o-matic*

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:34, archived)

This pun thread is so over. Bored with it, I am.

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:36, archived)

*hunts for puns*

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:49, archived)

Overboard? No?

Ah well.

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 11:13, archived)

he didn't run good enough

and he's paid the ultimate price!

(

Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:29, archived)

Its going to happen sooner or later...

not mine, but stole from teh internets:

(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:42, archived)

it just happened

I do however, like your username

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:43, archived)

He also microwaves his poo

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:51, archived)

what's wrong with that?

once it is dried out, it is easier to powder into mashed potato

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:53, archived)

I like to grate it over potato soup

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:55, archived)

microwaves are for defrosting or reheating

/fan-assisted

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

well

if you want to be "conventional"

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:57, archived)

I think he actually wants to be convectional

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:57, archived)

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:59, archived)

That URL always gives me a semi

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:59, archived)

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:01, archived)

is it rusty?

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:04, archived)

it has clown cancer

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rusty_trombone

fuck - the internet never stops teaching me more and more rude things.

IF ONLY IT HAD A PROPER USE!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:05, archived)

Pardon the expression but - pfft!

Anilingus sounds like an Oirish air stewardess

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:22, archived)

again?

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:43, archived)

"Not mine but stole from teh Internets"

Genius. Thank fuck you found it.

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:44, archived)

the internets will have to end because of this genius

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:45, archived)

Yea thank fuck!

What would be the point of having a board
for stuff you've made yourself if cunts couldn't
push it off with stolen stuff?

(

edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:49, archived)

oh no you di'ent

tj: anyone know where i can find some info on entomology, it's part of my course, but it isn't in the textbooks :( plz halp

(

weaver., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:44, archived)

no love

but you can look inside my flies!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:45, archived)

Info on entomology?

er, google?

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:45, archived)

Have you tried the internet?

It's new but it's good

(

Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:46, archived)

and full of porn :)

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:48, archived)

It's not ALL porn

some of it is pointless arguments

(

Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:49, archived)

you mean / talk

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:50, archived)

Fuck off it is.

(

An Eagle in Your Mind, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:50, archived)

I walked into that one

(

Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:53, archived)

google is your friend

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:46, archived)

Try

tinyurl.com/qef68b

(

Joliet, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:46, archived)

actually this one has better resources

tinyurl.com/r9luk5

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:48, archived)

I'm an expert on the subject as I'm "Just Some Guy Off The Interwebs™ "

so what's the question you're stuck on?

(

theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:47, archived)

how can I get raspberry jam out of my computer keyboard?

I've tried rubbing it with a cat but that just made it worse and left me with lacerations

Help me Just Some Guy off The Interwebs - you are my only hope

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:50, archived)

Put your keyboard in the freezer overnight (remember to disconnect it from the PC first unless you have an empty chest or walk-in freezer)

when suitably frozen, smash it against something hard. This should dislodge the jam. You may now eat the frozen jam as a tasty frozen treat, and your keyboard should be in perfect working order.

(

theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:55, archived)

*swoons*

can I freeze the cat too?

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:58, archived)

that depends on the breed

(

theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:01, archived)

this (second hit in google)

is a very nice site :

www.ent.iastate.edu/

(

The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:49, archived)

thanks

im also revising skin n stuff, the lecture notes are horrible :( www.b3ta.cr3ation.co.uk/data/jpg/lectures.jpg

(

weaver., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:50, archived)

Seriously

If you're at the point that you are asking strangers on a "humour" website about where to get information about entomology, you need to rethink your research strategy.

- Library
- Internet

It ain't rocket science, bud ;) Now. Where did I leave my book on rocket science....

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:53, archived)

meh

Rocket Science isn't Brain Surgery

I'm glad you put humour in quotes

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:55, archived)

It isn't?

Fuck I really need that book now.

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

i just need to revise it little

the silly lecturer took down all the lecture notes after a few weeks, and i always ask just in case, if you don't ask you don't get :)

(

weaver., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

Tru

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:58, archived)

fucking hell that sucks!

I've made a lot of slides for talks, and that looks like the sort of stuff you get if you leave it to the last minute...

I mean ffs, slides about biology without images?

(

The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

Aye

I hate twats who throw a load of text into powerpoint and then claim to be giving a presentation with slides

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:57, archived)

it's horrible

the whole series of notes is like that, block text, all in capitals, and the occasional picture to draw the eye

(

weaver., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:57, archived)

I think we need some sort of b3ta charity drive to get pictures into your notes

Think neurons drawn by Dr Dyslexia (with lazors), 3D animations by Happy Toast, beetles by er... connor.

(

The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:10, archived)

*votes for this*

(

Bee Nice |-|, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:28, archived)

Watch CSI

or Phenomena (Donald Pleasance with a dodgy scottish accent and clearly the basis for Grissom)

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:49, archived)

Curiously where I work if you can be bothered to get your arse here

www.zsl.org/info/library/

(

Jahled Three shades of black, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:51, archived)

STRANGER DANGER!!

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:58, archived)

I am a very fluffy psychapath

though there is indeed a collection of b3tards carefully preserved in glass jars in the basement

(

Jahled Three shades of black, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:02, archived)

now that's a classification scheme I would be interested to see :)

(

The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:11, archived)

Ta! I don't know how to use the internet

(Sheepattack!, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:45, archived)

top comment!

(

RiffRaff lurking like a lurky thing, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:25, archived)

Not only did you break my monitor

but you... oh what's the point...

Pea save!

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:45, archived)

ooh

classical humour!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:47, archived)

For someone who has been lurking for 2 years you sure are a fucking BUMFACE

Read the FAQ or FUCK OFF!

(

Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:47, archived)

My wife? Sure. My dog? Maybe.

My unsightly beard? NEVER!

*tools up*

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:47, archived)

YOU SIR have the KING OF BEARDS!

(

Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:50, archived)

well aren't you a little darling *pinched cheeks*

say, can we keep him?

(

theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:49, archived)

*slow clap*

(

An Eagle in Your Mind, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:49, archived)

with a spiked aidsclub

(

Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:51, archived)

fucking muppet

(

prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:50, archived)

hmmmm fucking muppets

*wanks*

(

Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:51, archived)

*patents muppet shaped wanking gloves*

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:54, archived)

Posting on /board? Long time since you read the FAQ?

Today you have won special prizes number 8, 9, 11, & 12. Instead of leaching someone else's oversize image, why not replace it with one you made that's within FAQ limits? (Use "Edit", not delete, or you'll win special prize 13 as well). Cheers and all that.
Edit: ...at least you clearly said you stole it. Some people do a lot worse.

(

Bee Nice |-|, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:06, archived)

you ARE nice!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:09, archived)

Ta! Talk about nailing my colours to the mast: the name's a curse, I tell you!

But I think it's good policy, most of the time. When things go wrong, 99% of the time it's just a cock-up, so why respond aggressively? I should do social work with young offenders in Scandinavia, clearly :-)

(

Bee Nice |-|, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:25, archived)

Seems appropriate to this post:

stealing fail...

(

..wil, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:32, archived)

All Aboard!

(

CanonCaliber A big bore, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:00, archived)

Oof!

Nicely

(

Joliet, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:02, archived)

this is good!

as a friend on facebook said yesterday...

If you had left a shop without paying for something, then offered to pay after you had been exposed, you would not be exempt from prosecution.

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:03, archived)

How simplistic

(

Joliet, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:04, archived)

I like this!

(

An Eagle in Your Mind, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:14, archived)

so true...

*does not offer to pay back expenses

(

op op op op op I stink therfore I spam, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:16, archived)

I did enjot Question time last night

old horse face Beckett was so out of her depth it was hilarious.
And teresa May looked like she was going to burst into tears at any moment.

Quite scary when you people you agree with are the Deputy editor of the Torygraph and the MD of McDonalds!

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:26, archived)

Did anyone quiz the Telegraph about them printing cricket articles from journalists that don't exist, as revealed in Private Eye?

(

Joliet, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:29, archived)

sadly not

unfortunately there was only one thing up for discussion last night.

What would be the point of printing articles from non-existant journalists?

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:32, archived)

They've sacked most of their resident journalists which means they save on paying their salary and the cost of sending them to the game

instead they just use Getty images and they get a cricket report from a generic source, effectively getting an entire article for nowt.

I've left my copy at home today so I don't have the details to hand

(

Joliet, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:36, archived)

so you're saying

there could be a job covering the cricket for the Telegraph?
*emails*

(

twig Save 6 Music, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:52, archived)

I think Fry beat you to it

(

Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:00, archived)

damn - wish I'd seen that last night

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:30, archived)

It did get a bit relentless after a while

The audience were well up for it, and DD had to tell them not to heckle, so that answers could be heard, which spoiled it slightly, as there's nothing better than seeing politicians die on their arse because no-one's listening to them

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:34, archived)

hehehe

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:39, archived)

QT is quite funny on teletext, I've found.

There's a kind of running joke about eyebrows/catapillars.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:40, archived)

Page 155 is the best thing about QT

(

Barbarossa is not my real name, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:06, archived)

Even my Stalinist Dad was chuckling at Telegraph cartoons this week.

And Newsnight has been ON FUCKING FIRE.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:38, archived)

they have to pay that because they have to be the house of commons on time

that place runs like clockwork goddammit!

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:03, archived)

that was outrageous

"...so a bit like a job then?"

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:04, archived)

I found that detachment from the real world far more offensive

than their claims for moat repair.

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:07, archived)

yes

this is sadly true

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:14, archived)

^this^

I have to say though, my MP is a fucking star.
I chatted to him in the pub a couple of weeks back and congratulated him on his voting record. I've also checked his expenses, and despite the fact he is eligable for a second home allowance, he doesn't claim it, and instead claims for London weighting (nothing unusual there), and his travel expenses consist of his Oystercard.

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:28, archived)

just like any other London businessman then really

well done to him!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:31, archived)

He's old school Labour

He's not gonna stand at the next election and I fancy the young lady who's going to take his place

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:33, archived)

even better!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:40, archived)

certainly is...

farm4.static.flickr.com/3575/3316987309_61286e4250.jpg?v=0

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:43, archived)

*moves to same constituency*

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 10:04, archived)

£155,970 for my theif

(

prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:36, archived)

Who's that then?

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:40, archived)

Tom Clarke

but to be fair I guess he does need a second home down south..wanker

(

prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:45, archived)

All is clair...

;)

(

..wil, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:05, archived)

Short.?

(

CanonCaliber A big bore, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:09, archived)

Actually I do feel sorry for her a little after her exposure yesterday

as she did notice the overclaim herself and paid it back without being asked in 2006.

There will be genuine mistakes in any form of administered scheme, and this would appear to be one of them. To me anyway.

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:15, archived)

£25000pa probably wouldnt get much of a rented property in Central London

(

CanonCaliber A big bore, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:21, archived)

Not in the centre

but no one NEEDS to live in the centre of London. You CHOOSE to live there

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:29, archived)

Aye, but it reinforces that detachment from reality thing that Tasty mentioned up there ^

If you're not noticing an extra 800 quid being sent to you every month...

edit: I did obviously mean to type "Toasty" but I'm sure he won't mind my freundian slip.

(

Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:21, archived)

yes this is true

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:22, archived)

^this^

The fact some of these fuckers are quite happy to pay back £thousands in the blink of an eye.

If they can afford to pay it back, why fucking claim it in the first place?

(

Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:35, archived)

Nicely

merry Friday, everyone.

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:07, archived)

*Last day before the weekend high fives*

Morning captain, how does the morning find you?

(

Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:12, archived)

Shattered and soggy. You?

(

Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:13, archived)

For the first time in months I looked forward to coming to work

Unfortunately this is only a small project and I will be back to the monotony of converting 20 year old programs soon enough :(

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Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:20, archived)

I've not looked forward to coming to work in 2 years.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:23, archived)

Aw!

I love my job

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Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:23, archived)

Good for you.

Read below.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:24, archived)

have done

go in constructively fighting. Make suggestions for how the issue can be avoided for the future.

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Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:26, archived)

You need sexy party Friday

*Benny Hill music*

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Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:25, archived)

GAH

*strips to y fronts and chases Maximinumus round the office with a feather duster*

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Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:27, archived)

LEAVE MY SPAGHETTI CODE ALONE!

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Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:23, archived)

*cyclomatic complexifies*

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The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:45, archived)

Merry Friday, pud

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Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:15, archived)

*snuggle*

right. I now have to get my arse handed to me by my account manager, as I've not sorted a query that was raised with me at half four yesterday, about a feed I thought went in correctly, due to never having any training on how to load it and being left on my own to sink or swim in a new, much more stressful job (I changed jobs as my doctor was seriously worried about my stress levels)

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:22, archived)

Well, it is a lovely arse, so admire it while it is being handed to you

;)

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Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:24, archived)

You're a sweetie.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:24, archived)

just tell it straight

the buck rests with the account manager usually, so ask him/her why you haven't been trained and was left on your own. You should find a change in attitude from them

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Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:25, archived)

Because she was on holiday for two weeks.

As was my line manager, and at the moment, so is the woman who USED to do this job, who is the only one with any working knowledge of the stuff I need to use.

I need to go back to the doctors to get him to give me bigger anti depressants, when I do I just know he's going to have a go at me because I won't let him sign me off.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:26, archived)

ask them

if the job was so important, ask why was this situation allowed to arise.

It's down to the manager to ensure that people are able to do their jobs!

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Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:27, archived)

Line managaer and account manager

on leave at the same time... fucktards!

As Moz once said, just do your best and don't worry.

I've found myself in similar situations, having to deal with stuff I've got no knowledge of, and no one to help. I just try and defuse the situation as best I can. when your superiors return tell them how you dealt with the difficult situatuion you found yourself in and if they've got any decency (unlikely) they'll appreciate your effort under difficult circumstances.

Or maybe that's just bollox and I should realise we don't live ion that kind of world.

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Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:49, archived)

*beams internet hugs*

This is why I now choose to work for a small company.

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Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:27, archived)

I'm ok, neck is still painful :(

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Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:38, archived)

FRIDAY FRIDAY FRIDAY!

And payday to boot!

The Milky bars are on me!

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Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:41, archived)

I miss pay day :(

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prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 15 May 2009, 10:04, archived)

hehehehhe!

ningles everyone!

I would say YAY for fridays, but so far i've spent 45 mins looking for my keys, got held up in traffic, then the train was late. Today had better perk up a bit....

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theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:13, archived)

course it will

it's Friday!

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Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:24, archived)

*gives a determined-hero look* [camera zooms on on face]

"It better do, or else"
[fades to black]
~cliffhanger type music cue~

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theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:29, archived)

Flat tyre

mudslide in Harefield
slow driving wankers when I'm late
fucking retard pulling out in front of me in Uxbridge without looking

I want my bed and chocolate spread sandwiches with Gold margarine.

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Joliet, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:28, archived)

Gold margarine!

eurgh!

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Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:32, archived)

slow drivers really peeve me off.. Got stuck behind on on my way to see some mates, something like 15mph in a 30 zone all the crappy way

then to make things worse, on the way back, I got stuck behind her AGAIN.

Still, I didn't have to deal with mudslides and flat tyres, that sounds rather nasty..... :S

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theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:37, archived)

damn that commute.

Today I got out of bed at 0810, did my dirty business, had a shower, brushed my teeth, made 4 slices of toast with raspberry jam and a mug of tea, walked back upstairs to my office. Answered an email and then settled in for an easy days working/loafing.

Shit - I forgot to get dressed!

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Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:29, archived)

oh you sod :D

up at 6am as usual. I wasn't designed for this sort of thing.

Right, that's it, this weekend, I will win the lottery. That's my great plan.

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theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:41, archived)

B3ta in your pants

is the best kind of B3ta

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Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:52, archived)

I want to be a MP

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Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:36, archived)

Just like Colonel Dekker?

you would get to chase the A-Team around, which sounds fun.

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Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:43, archived)

Are you not in the House of Lords

They get even better allowances

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CanonCaliber A big bore, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:44, archived)

YAY! Holland missed the finals

A male co-worker is leaving today, and we're all signing this increasable gay farewell card. Did some offline toaping.

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Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Fri 15 May 2009, 8:58, archived)

when a friend of mine left a company once

he told his colleagues not to buy him anything with the whipround but just to give him the money instead. Miserable Mancunian Git!

They did too

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Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:01, archived)

We have the policy that we all chip in , and buy the gift the person in question wants.

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Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:03, archived)

ooh - abuseable!

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Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:04, archived)

Meh

I hate the whole present giving thing, it's gay and shit.

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Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:07, archived)

You so want it up the arse

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Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:20, archived)

Whut whut in the butt

ning sir

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Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:23, archived)

Good moaning

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Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:25, archived)

Hello Dixon

I had this cock on ignore till I cleared my list.
Seems like nothing's changed.

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Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:24, archived)

Not really

Hello sexyness

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Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:28, archived)

Gary Barlow's dog?

Hehehe

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Joliet, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:03, archived)

what?

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Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:38, archived)

I was thinking of doing a mini sign language toy or hologram

to plug in to speakers, but thought that that would be fucking awesome

*trademarks*

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HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:39, archived)

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Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:42, archived)

I saw it last night :)

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HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:54, archived)

Digital? "It's 8.00, this is BBC Radio 2 on 88 - 91Fefrailwerhybo uhliu8 yp98hsdf,hjb c b$%"£$%"£*^"

Iggytor

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Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:41, archived)

Skeletor and Annie Lennox?

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An Eagle in Your Mind, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:42, archived)

Iggy Pop

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Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:43, archived)

Actually the result looks more like Annie Lennox.

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An Eagle in Your Mind, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:46, archived)

Loganberry

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Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:51, archived)

Ha ha, very good.

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An Eagle in Your Mind, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:42, archived)

Fucking ABC National

Scrolling too quickly again.

(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Fri 15 May 2009, 9:01, archived)

Is there a braille version?

for the Deaf And Blind

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CanonCaliber A big bore, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:13, archived)

This over-complicated product form the future has already been invented...

No apologies for my crap artwork.

(chrisy may have been stored with nut-based products, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:33, archived)

^this^

"Coffee please"
"What kind?"
"Coffee... with milk"
"Yeah, but what kind?"
"Just a normal coffee"
"Americano?"
"if that's what normal coffee is now called..."

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Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:36, archived)

Precisely

(chrisy may have been stored with nut-based products, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:41, archived)

They are fucking nuts. Next is what size...

English name
Italian name
or Spanish name?

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Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:49, archived)

I always just say LARGE

very loudly and slowly

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Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:50, archived)

watch the film

role models -you will enjoy it

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SiX and his hat, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:06, archived)

I did

Damned funny.

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gareth_alien will be human again at, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:14, archived)

I was watching tv last night and saw "one day" wash off suntan

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HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:38, archived)

Ahhhh, Bisto

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Bela Lugosi's Dad, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:42, archived)

That made me wonder if it would all go streaky when it rained

or would you end up with a brown body and white hands after washing your hands during the day

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Joliet, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:50, archived)

WHY!

FFS... that sounds like something we'd come up with on here

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Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 15 May 2009, 8:54, archived)

like a solar powered tanning bed

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Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 15 May 2009, 8:59, archived)

Yeh, I don't get that either, it's like all the work of applying normal fake tan, but with only one day's reward instead of a week!

For weekend fanta girls?

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..wil, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:07, archived)

And people who don't wear white

Or anything light coloured
Jesus, imagine the state of a white thong after a fat sweaty lass has rubbed it all over her pasty arse for the weekend.

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Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:40, archived)

Fucking 'Fresh Made For You' Subway and their shite over-priced over-produced over-complicated service,

I find myself constantly dragged in by friends under the impression it's cool and healthy, but all I wanna say is JUST SELL ME A FUCKING SANDWICH!!!

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..wil, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:05, archived)

haha!

lovely style! :D

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op op op op op I stink therfore I spam, Fri 15 May 2009, 9:12, archived)

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