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The internet isn't as good as it used to be.
I preferred it when it was all Netscape and there were only 256 colours.

What makes you think that 1995 wasn't so bad, really?
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:07, archived)
I was eleven and a half stone and had hair down to my arse

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:09, archived)
And still in your mid fourties...

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:10, archived)
It's a miracle of the age

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:10, archived)
Noit is now only eleven stone.
Skinny fucker.
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:10, archived)
Fucking hell
what have you been doing to him? Keeping him in a box under the stairs?
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:11, archived)
He's been walking lots and lots in his job.
He's naturally skinny, though.
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:12, archived)

l n
(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:15, archived)
Well, I'm only 12 st 3lb now
And rather pleased that I got into these 32" waist Levis tonight. God, what have I become? Some kind of neurotic housewife?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:14, archived)
Isnt it time for your face mask?

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:15, archived)
I'm off to get my arsed waxed

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:15, archived)
You're very svelte lately, it's true.

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:17, archived)
You totally want me

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:19, archived)
Levis?
It's not 1985.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:17, archived)
It was the last time I put these on

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:19, archived)
I'm 10 and a half stone
Fit as a fiddle me, just wish I could kick the crack :(
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:30, archived)
Now you're a good 14 years older, with lesser hair and you grumble and moan at a person you've never met, from the internet.
:(
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:11, archived)

www.wwwk.co.uk/music/hit-singles/songs/90s/outherebro-dontstop.htm
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:09, archived)
I was 12
I can't remember if that was good or bad. Telly and advertising and 'celebrities' weren't quite so shit.
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:10, archived)
We beat everybody at SJP.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:10, archived)
Sarah Jessica Parker?

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:15, archived)
Sarah Jessica Parker?
oops, gay answer.
(I helped save b3ta! Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:16, archived)
TWO GAYS!

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:16, archived)
I was speaking for myself
I'm sure MOT had his own agenda unknown to me.
(I helped save b3ta! Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:20, archived)
Gangstas Paradise boiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:10, archived)
Oooooh

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:13, archived)
Fred West RIP

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:12, archived)
SSG will get to meet this great man soon.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:13, archived)
Father of the Bride II
YES!
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:12, archived)
I finally sat my A-level exams and got decent grades (moved from my island home to a cool sixth form college in Cambridge for a year), which was good
but I also didn't apply to Oxbridge and failed to keep in touch with a lot of cool people, which was bad...

If I had a time machine, I would definitely go back and give my 1995 self a good talking to (although that would create some sort of paradox etc.)
(I helped save b3ta! custard, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:13, archived)
there's nothing bad about not applying to Oxbridge,
I didn't either. There are loads of other good universities. And jobs, for that matter.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:14, archived)
I didn't.
But then I'm not nearly smart enough for Oxford or Cambridge.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:18, archived)
I reckon I was,
but they didn't go through UCAS at the time so I didn't think it was worth the bother.
Although I knew a guy who got 5 As at A-level and still got rejected.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:20, archived)
I just wish I had applied instead of assuming that I wouldn't get in
I would have done loads more work/learnt more at Oxbridge; I bumped into a few undergrads that I knew whilst doing my A-levels, and the amount of work/reading they were required to do was much more than I was required to do at my uni (for them, doing the minimum wasn't really an option).
(I helped save b3ta! custard, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:25, archived)

talk see
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:15, archived)
My Dad ditched the ski-slope-nosed Swiss bitch he'd shacked up with
and had a mid-life crisis, which was a laugh to ride on the periphery of
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:13, archived)
Is a periphery a make of sports car?

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:16, archived)
No, but he did buy a bright red Toyota Celica

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:20, archived)
Not much to remember from being 4, i'm guessing I didn't have many worries.

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:14, archived)
I was working as a research assistant with no overheads and access to cheap stoodent beer and cheaper stoodent women.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:14, archived)
Also some bloke at the university of delft had uploaded his entire smut collection onto an ftp server and started the porn-o-net revolution.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:15, archived)
I was a stoodent, but never cheap.
Or a woman.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:19, archived)
I could still have had you any time I wanted you.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:22, archived)
I moved to Cornwall
and impregnated my wife.

And had a 386 SX 16 laptop with a black and white screen so I couldn't see all of those colours until 1996 when I got a 386 DX 20 desktop.
(I helped save b3ta! Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:15, archived)
I was 7 to 8 years old and didn't have to do things like Condensed matter physics.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:16, archived)
Toy Story came out.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:16, archived)
So did Dale Winton.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:18, archived)
i can't remember 1995

(I helped save b3ta! well, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:17, archived)
1995 was pretty shit looking on wiki for what happened that year

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:18, archived)
It started off badly, what with Fred West dying and everything.
It was all downhill from there.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:19, archived)
Dire Straits RIP

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:20, archived)
National Lottery started too
I hated the bint in my class who got four numbers in the first draw
(I helped save b3ta! custard, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:21, archived)
Posting things that end with "Just a thought." is an act reserved for losers at internet.
What else?
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:31, archived)
I don't know.
Maybe you just stop posting...

Just a thought.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:32, archived)
Good point.
Angry replies to people's criticisms that say "YOU DON'T HAVE TO READ MY POSTS AND THEN REPLY".
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:33, archived)
I hate you baldmonkey.
Marry me?
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:33, archived)
Yes.
If I thought you meant it, I'd be yours at the drop of a hat.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:35, archived)
there is much to discuss

(I helped save b3ta! (|D[ekionplexis B3ta.com: fictional child porn is OK, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:32, archived)
leaving a comment on a youtube video

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:32, archived)
Putting cheers at the end of every posts.
Using tired memes like EPIC FAIL and WIN and FUCKING UNCREATIVE BITS OF BOLLOCKS LIEK RG|GGRGRRG!H!H!!!
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:32, archived)
Upset online?

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:02, archived)
Just a thought
starting with it is just as bad.
(I helped save b3ta! nick the greek, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:33, archived)
''Dear Baldmonkey....''.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:33, archived)
Reserved for the cuntest of pricks.
Yes.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)
Frequenting politics themed chat rooms

(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)
Like the house of commons?

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)
I wouldn't bother
it's full of trolls
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:36, archived)
I saw a baby the other day that looked exactly like Paddy Ashdown.

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:38, archived)
Aaaaaaaaaaah, bless.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:03, archived)
well that just shows how much i suck

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:37, archived)
the houses of parliament, for instance

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:37, archived)
Use of the word "methinks".

(I helped save b3ta! LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)
Ooh... good one.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:35, archived)
Verily so!

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:46, archived)
anything with JMG at the end

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:35, archived)
I'd have to say that one is probably a matter of taste.
But let's not get hung up on that. Let's dress smartly and go out on the town.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:36, archived)
nah i`m working
so I shall wear my uniform and do stuff
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:39, archived)
Your mum?

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:46, archived)

img134.imageshack.us/img134/2769/jmgsfaultmcdonalds.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:55, archived)

things that end with "Just a thought."

strikethoughs
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:35, archived)
I'm bored baldmonkey.
If I had any money again I'd be sorely tempted to start drinking again.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:36, archived)
TURPS!

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:37, archived)
*hugs* is the reserve of the timid or the needy, grow up

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:36, archived)
*hugs*

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:37, archived)
he said predictably.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:38, archived)
i can not stand all that balls, and the 'i'm making a cup of tea who wants one?' it is so pathetic

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:39, archived)
i think mr grumpypants needs a visit from the hug lorry

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:40, archived)
YAY hUG lOrRy!

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:41, archived)
and people going 'aww sweetie what's wrong?' fuck off to another site or msn, i like my b3ta cruel and nasty
AND FUNNY
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:42, archived)
Too fucking right
I looked at OT yesterday and I couldn't bear if this place was like that with all the mincing around.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:43, archived)

www.glastonbridge.co.uk/img/al-hug-lorry-00.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:45, archived)
pffft

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:46, archived)
hahahaha
brilliant.
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:08, archived)
*applies bacons*

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:41, archived)
nyom nyom nyom
fucking cunts
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:43, archived)
That sounds full of win.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:52, archived)

full of + all of the
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:54, archived)
i am timid and needy
:(
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:38, archived)
then i suggest you log off of the internet and see a mental health care doctor, or not, no offence

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:41, archived)
similarly, "bless" is only for the emotionally withered

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:43, archived)
I think behind all your anger is a big softy that just needs a hug.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:44, archived)
i imagine him sitting at his pc with his collection of plushies around him
kissing them for every grumpy post he makes
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:45, archived)
"Pikachu I choose you MWAH"

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:48, archived)
all the bedding in my room is pink with crimson hearts

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:48, archived)
Oi.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:06, archived)
People that whistle the McDonalds jingle.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:48, archived)
People who don't win races.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:49, archived)
People who are forever misplacing things.
Like (very expensive) sunglasses.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:49, archived)
Or (very cheap) cleaners corpses.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:51, archived)
I think I will drink cider and then go to the pub tonight.

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:07, archived)
that's an interesting way round

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:08, archived)
I will then have more cider, and my mates.
And when we have a lock in I can smoke IN the pub.
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:12, archived)
Snooty, holier-than-thou, know it all posts.
Even better with poor spelling.
(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 18:11, archived)
Everybody shut up a moment. It's me, JMG.
I'm putting on some TOP TOGS as I'm going OUT with a *IRL from the ***LINE WORLD.
Who'd like to spend the next five minutes explaining how you aren't worked up at all, using smilies wherever possible.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:45, archived)
Oh Jammie
***LINE?
:(((((((((((((
(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:47, archived)
I'm off to a barbecue JMG.
:D
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:47, archived)
I'm off to barbecue JMG.
*tongs*
*charcoal*
*ticket to Newcastle*
(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:04, archived)
I predict a RUSTY TUSSLE!

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:05, archived)
Hi I'm Rusty Tussle.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:14, archived)
and I'm Ed Winchester.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:17, archived)
*Audience applause*

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:17, archived)
I'm playing a video game and it scared me :(

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:47, archived)
I'll hold you
*holds*
(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:55, archived)
*reciprocates*

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:11, archived)
*masturbates*

(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:12, archived)
I BET YOU SCREAMED AND WET YOURSELF
WET CUT
(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:02, archived)
No, I just jumped and went "FUCK"

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:05, archived)
Oi
i said i'd hold you :(((((
(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:07, archived)
I HAVE RECIPROCATED

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:11, archived)
I HAVE MASTURBATED

(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:12, archived)
I AM SATURATED

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:14, archived)
CORRRR!

(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:15, archived)
Which game?
I was playing S.T.A.L.K.E.R, frequent pant changing was needed.
(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:09, archived)
Metroid Prime 3

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:12, archived)
Fuckin ace game

(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:13, archived)
not really all that scary though

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:13, archived)
Well i didnt need to change my pants

(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:14, archived)
The section on the Valhalla made me jump.
It's incredibly claustrophobic
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:17, archived)
Too fucking right
that's a proper lay down the plastic sheeting game. I'm playing the Oblivion Lost mod for it and it's jolly good fun all round.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:15, archived)
I think it's the ambient music that's scary
and horrific mutants throwing themselves at you.
(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:26, archived)
F.E.A.R is creepy as well
so any game that's an acronym it seems.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:42, archived)
Were you playing Condemned?
Because that made me do a jump/wee recently
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:14, archived)
I'm off out soon too

(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:48, archived)
Hahaha,
funny jokes.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:50, archived)
eh?
Oh! I just read it properly. I'm not off out with JMG. You couldn't pay me to date a Geordie.
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:52, archived)
Now there's a lie!

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:58, archived)
Did you pay her?
How much?
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:02, archived)
I've been OUT already today.
I spoke to people who DON'T USE the internet. And had a pint in the sunshine. With some BOYS and MY DAD.
(I helped save b3ta! LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:48, archived)
*Firm handshakes*
Excellent work in the field.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:50, archived)
that sounds fun
i might make some toast later
(I helped save b3ta! (|D[ekionplexis B3ta.com: fictional child porn is OK, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:48, archived)
TUBBYTOAST!!!

(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:49, archived)
after you've had the op

(I helped save b3ta! (|D[ekionplexis B3ta.com: fictional child porn is OK, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:50, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/6222538
(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:51, archived)
ah, i have no bread

(I helped save b3ta! (|D[ekionplexis B3ta.com: fictional child porn is OK, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:00, archived)
mince in bags and ham in tins
butchers' sausages on a string
meat's the best thing since sliced bread
one thing to try before you're dead, it's

meat on toast
meat on toast
don't give me no sunday roast
i just wanna watch rentaghost
while i eat my meat on toast

lightly grilled fresh scottish salmon
thinly sliced and salted gammon
granary and harvest grain
try a croissant, it's insane!

meat on toast
meat on toast
don't give me no sunday roast
i just wanna watch rentaghost
while i eat my meat on toast
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:10, archived)
I've just spent several hours
Taking the contents out of two PC cases in order to swap them over. Annoyingly, the smaller case has a tiny PSU which isn't compatible with the other motherboard, and the other PSU wont fit in the tiny case so it was all for nothing.

So I put everything back where it was, but haven't connected up the four extra fans, so it's much quieter now.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:49, archived)
i've got cheese on toast
mmm
(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:52, archived)
JMG, surely telling people on the INTERNET that you have a girlfriend, offline
invalidates her existence and puts you back at square one?
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:53, archived)
you great big dolescum balding trust-fund virgin!

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:55, archived)
LOL!11!!

(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:56, archived)
I never said I had a girlfriend, Moohalaa.
*Taps head*
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:58, archived)
a-ah, now Jammy, this is the Internet.
Girls do not frequent this place.

Under Internet Legislation put forward by Piston Broke in 1993, any 'girl' mentioned offline means you're automatically shagging them.

This was used to great effect by Mr Broke in the 1994-7 Virgin wars at Games Workshop, where by standing near women,
talking about it online, his interego proved he had been positively swimming in poon.

You dole virgin bald.
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:01, archived)
YOU FLIMSY WRISTED QUEEN!
An excellent post, there.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:06, archived)
I have been out all day
taking my son and his mate swimming.

I have just got home. My day has consisted of trying to swim lengths whilst avoiding inflatables and flying children.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:02, archived)
The offline world is vastly overrated
Nature is the shittest part of it. I'm supposed to believe that rolling valleys and birdsong are great enjoyable entertainment. I just don't see it. Where are the end of level bosses? Why don't I get cool noises and fluorescent lights when I level up? Why can't my bag contain an infinite number of potions? What a load of rubbish...
(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:05, archived)
I cancelled my ***line plans as my guts cannot be trusted at the moment :(

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:07, archived)
Too much
UTBNB eh?

say no more
/taps nose
(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:08, archived)
I'm off in an hour or so,
so yeah, me, offline
(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:11, archived)
Ive been in bed since yesterday afternoon
alone
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:12, archived)
That's what you get for drinking petrol.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:17, archived)
I didn't drink it
I just inhaled massive quantities of it
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:21, archived)
Bloody hell, how did you manage that?

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:30, archived)
replacing perished fuel hoses on the car
working exposed (and with the stuff gushing onto my hands over and over again) for two hours. I'm an idiot.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)
I had a dream last night that
I was a JMG and I could fly and leap tall buildings. But then I awoke, and realised I wasn't a JMG, which saddened me.


colon, closing parenthesis
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:13, archived)
I'm a lot like Mr Sandman.
Except I deliver punches to the faces of the fat and sleeping.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:19, archived)
bingo
gaz now, times running out
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:13, archived)
I'm off to Belgium with the missus for a week on Monday.
We're renting a car and staying near Bruges. What should we do?
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)
Go inside Brugges,
then tell everyeone that you're in Brugges.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:57, archived)
pack four kilos of heroin up your arse and meet me at southampton

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:58, archived)
meet a racist midget

(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)
There's a midget on my street AND one on Nicky's.
There seem to be loads of them round here.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)
Saw one at Adwick last week.
She was less than 3 feet tall.
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:26, archived)
Leave Kirsty alone!

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:32, archived)
Go find the place where they shot that little midget in the face.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)
Oh dear. I'm almost as funny as jenpots.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)
reach for the stars mike.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)
Reaching for a noose.
First suicide live on /talk
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)
This is the kind of thing that happens when rnuk doesn't let people hit him.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:08, archived)
almost
you must try harder
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)
a week in a really dull country, how exciting, in a dull way

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)
It's also dirt cheap, it's an area I know from childhood, and the lady is into her art.

(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)
antwerp has a good redlight area

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:08, archived)
Await 'The Amber Fox'.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)
Check out your awesome playlist dewd.
www.b3tards.com/u/63e645c3826fa9bc7564/photo0241.jpg

Happy randomburnings here.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:16, archived)
You should see the one someone else is getting.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:16, archived)
This is far too much effort. I'm not even half way through the process.
www.b3tards.com/u/63e645c3826fa9bc7564/photo0242.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:19, archived)
mine are finally being burnt on monday at work
I've left it a bit late
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:20, archived)
Haha, that's fucking brilliant.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:22, archived)
Oooo, I'm liking that.
Impressed at being able to write that small as well.
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)
I'm impressed you could read it.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:21, archived)
I got down to 'Everlong'.
The next one looks like 'Room! Woke De Up Jeba Yor La'.
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:31, archived)
Wham! Wake me up before you go go.
Pretty close guess.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:32, archived)
Meet a Canadian
Smash the guy in the face and proclaim "That is for John Lennon you fucking cunt"
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)
Try finding a real country that has made a better contribution to the world in the past 100 years.
Their abuse of the Congo does not count.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)
I imagine we'll be nipping over the Dutch border as there's a lovely little town called Sluise right on the border.
There's a cracking restaurant and a gorgeous toy shop there that I want to revisit.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:06, archived)
Yes, the Dutch
straddling the world stage and gripping the throat of international politics.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:10, archived)
Yeah, everyone should base their holiday destinations on the contributions of that nation to politics!
Fuck enjoyment, holidays are serious business.
(I helped save b3ta! Mu Dinofiddler, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:18, archived)
You may be surprised to find out I'm just having a little joke

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:20, archived)
You may be surprised to find out that I am a small dish of indian ghee.

(I helped save b3ta! Mu Dinofiddler, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:22, archived)
Crikey

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:24, archived)
INO!

(I helped save b3ta! Mu Dinofiddler, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:25, archived)
you should be banned
little jokes on the internet, whatever next!
(Just Harry What should I put here?, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:24, archived)
If we don't put a stop to this next people will be taking the michael out of figures from popular culture, online!

(I helped save b3ta! Mu Dinofiddler, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:28, archived)
the whole moral fibre of society could fall apart
lets vote for the BNP, it's the only way we can survive
(Just Harry What should I put here?, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:31, archived)
Where the fuck is bruges?


/Colin Farrell
(I helped save b3ta! BILL DOOR - MOON-MASTER, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:13, archived)
see if you can have a ride around bruges in a horse-drawn coach
from bruges town square, did it years ago so i'm not sure if is still done
(Just Harry What should I put here?, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:15, archived)
carry on driving until you're not in Belgium

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 16:22, archived)
New Thread
Yes
(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:37, archived)
This is going places.
Glad to be a part of it.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:38, archived)
What shall we talk about in here?
I'm so excited. Shall we talk about drugs or sex or something or maybe a news article or even a news article about sex or drugs omg omg omg omg omg so excited.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:39, archived)
COMPUTERS

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:40, archived)
I LIKE COMPUTERS
DO YUO?
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:40, archived)
YER

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:42, archived)
Right that went pretty well, what else should we talk about?

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:42, archived)
WE ARE STILL TALKING ABOUT COMPUTORS
COMPUTORS
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:43, archived)
I LIKE THE COMPUTER

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:42, archived)
IT IS BETTER THAN THE BICYCLE
BUT INFERIOUR TO CATS
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:43, archived)
I AGREE WITH YOUR SENTIMENT.
DO YOU OWN A CAT?
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:45, archived)
NO BUT LOTS OF COMPUTERS!!!

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)
OH MAN YOU ARE SO COOL

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:49, archived)
DOGZ BETTER CATS

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:48, archived)
CATS ARE LIKE MS WINDOWS, THEY RUIN YOUR FURNITURE BUT THEY'RE LOVABLE
DOGS ARE LIKE LINUX, THEY DO WHAT THEY'RE TOLD BUT THEN THEY DON'T, AND THEY ENCOURAGE YOU TO GROW A BEARD
RABBITS ARE LIKE MAC OS, THEY LOOK ALL FLUFFY AND CUTE BUT THEY'RE ALWAYS PLOTTING AGAINST YOU
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)
capslock is giving me a headache
i'm going to stop now
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)
I MAY GET A NETBOOK
OR INSTALL UBUNTU ONTO MY EEEBOX
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:43, archived)
UBUNTU 9.04 IS PRETTY GOOD

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:45, archived)
I'M HOPING THAT KOALA WILL BE PRETTY
AS THEY ARE PLANNING ON DITCHING THE BROWN. LIKE AN EX - HOMOSEXUAL.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)
THIS IS VERY TRUE
I HAVE HEARD GOOD THINGS ABOUT EEEBUNTOO
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:50, archived)
Hey man, we could, like, totally talk about our lunch.
Just, you know, putting it out there.
(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:40, archived)
+boxes
it
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:42, archived)
Finally.
Unsurprisingly, I'm eating crisps.
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:39, archived)
WHOOP DE FUCKING DOO

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:41, archived)
I'm here.
Who wants to touch me?
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:45, archived)
I want to touch you in the face. With my fist.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:46, archived)
that would be a good way of releasing the anger felt surrounding SSG's illness, if rnuk was a man he'd let us knock the shit out of him for SSG

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:48, archived)
Come on rnuk do the decent thing and make this happen.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:50, archived)
Agreeing with this here.
It's nothing personal I just want to vent my sadness. With my fists.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)
You are the girl
that I've been dreaming of
ever since I was a little girl.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)
'Where's my heart?'
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8092930.stm

This is disturbing. What has disturbed you today?
(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:11, archived)
I'm pretty sure my heart is in my knob.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:12, archived)
A family of obese Indian people who got on my train then feasted on nothing but jam butties

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:13, archived)
Better than burgers, I guess

(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:13, archived)
Are you sure it was jam and not chutney?

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:14, archived)
Yes I am sure
As they left plenty of it behind for some mug to clean up
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:15, archived)
You use mugs to clean the trains?
I'd use people myself.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:18, archived)
They're mostly ex cons with nazi tattoos on their hands
Mugs is a fair description
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:18, archived)
There's a porno in the making here
'fair haired ticket inspector and the gruff neo nazi cleaners'

It'll make millions
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:48, archived)
Actually that could probably extend into a series of childrens books too.

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:50, archived)
YOU'D probably extend into a series of children's books
i don't even know what that means
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)
I'm not sure I can perform for the cameras
This could be a problem
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:53, archived)
Only about 30% know where the lungs are?
Bloody hell..
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:13, archived)
Everyone knows they're in your face
along with the spleen, and dendritic gangula
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:42, archived)
That picture makes me sad because of the pancreas bullying the other day.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:13, archived)
The Pancreas looks like a large piece of tasty tasty bacon

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:28, archived)
I hope you can find some solace in the fact that I too am feeling sad about this.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:02, archived)
It helps knowing that there are other people in my little boat of sadness.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:09, archived)
My thoughts are with SSG's family at this difficult time.
Together, we can't beat cancer. Although most patients die.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:12, archived)
Room for more.
www.b3tards.com/u/521c99d33075d600cdbb/boatofsadness.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:25, archived)
Can you make my penis bigger for accuracy?

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:31, archived)
i think i'm too sad to join you in the boat, i'd just depress everyone
:(((
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:34, archived)
Come on in mongy.
There's room for, what looks like, one more person in this tiny boat.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:38, archived)
SSG Boat Of Sadness is almost full :(
www.b3tards.com/u/521c99d33075d600cdbb/boatofsadness12.jpg


www.b3ta.com/talk/6222803#post6222808
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:38, archived)
clickin dis

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:39, archived)
I hope SSG gets to see it. He needs to know we're there for him. On a boat.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:46, archived)
Start getting excited. I've just started trying to start doing my randomburn.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:54, archived)
YES!

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)
Needs more Doveston.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 17:26, archived)
That's not disturbing.
Why does the average person need to know where internal organs are?
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:14, archived)
So you know where to stab with accuracy.

(I helped save b3ta! NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:18, archived)
How can you not know where your heart and lungs are?!
You're ever aware of their presence, it's like not knowing where your foot is!
(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:21, archived)
You don't walk with your liver.

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:23, archived)
Liver was one of the better answered ones

(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:23, archived)
Oh good, they won't fall over then.

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:24, archived)
Still, it's basic anatomy, an awareness of yourself
And others.
(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:26, archived)
Cat's don't know where their organs are, and they seem to do fine.

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:27, archived)
A cat couldn't phone an ambulance if another cat was ran over
Knowing where organs are have an advantage when calling ambulances.
(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:29, archived)
"Oh god there's tyre tracks goint right across his..."

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:30, archived)
''We're not coming out until you tell us exactly where your spleen is located.''?

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:31, archived)
The people were asked heart, lungs, kidneys, ovaries, intestines, bladder
Basic stuff. From a shaded picture.
(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:33, archived)
''We're not coming out until you tell us exactly where your heart, lungs, kidneys, ovaries, intestines and bladder are located.''?

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:39, archived)
It's completely unnecessary for day to day living
it's not as if knowing where they are wil ever change anything about how you live your life
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:29, archived)
The number of people who accidentally get their Pancreas pierced when actually wanting a Prince Albert is shocking

(I helped save b3ta! minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:35, archived)
I once saw a man toss another man off thinking he was performing CPR.

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:40, archived)
"You're not going out dressed like that! You'll get kidneychill!"
"ACKtually Mother, my kidneys are 30mm higher than the hem of this top, so I think you'll find that I'll be fine."
"Oh, ok then, have fun. Remember to swallow if you want him to propose to you"
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:43, archived)
The amount of times I've tried smoking a cig through my anus is unbelieveable,
I just keep forgetting where my lungs are.
(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:01, archived)
It's hardly disturbing. It's not even worrying.

(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:15, archived)
They don't need to,
but you'd think they'd know.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:37, archived)
I assume you've never
tried to punch someone in the kidneys?
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:42, archived)
Poor SSG :(

(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:16, archived)
sickening cancer racism

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:22, archived)
I now propose that SSG has Tasty Bacon Disease

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:31, archived)
I can understand some of the more obscure ones,
like the pancreas. But the heart? I'm amazed that anybody doesn't know where that is.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:52, archived)
I seem to remember at school being told it was on one side of the chest cavity
when in fact it's a lot closer to the middle.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:59, archived)
I bet you looked a fool when trying Kobra's 'Heart Grab' fatality from Mortal Kombat and came out holding fuck all.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:01, archived)
Yeah, it's common that people think it's on their left because it's a stronger muscle, when it's only slightly to that side.

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:02, archived)
sometimes these things are phrased badly,
and adults forget how literally children tend to take things. They say "it's on the left" meaning it's only a bit on the left, but of course when you're only 6 you think they mean it's practically in your armpit.

When I was little I thought we had two hearts, one on each side, because the doctor used his stethoscope on both sides when he did my checkup. Because adults tell you they use a stethoscope to listen to your heart, they don't tell you they use them on your lungs as well!
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:05, archived)
I watched Iron Man so I know it's in the middle.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 15:07, archived)
is this even fucking real?
www.break.com/usercontent/2009/6/talent-audition-gone-bad-751067.html

nsfw ish
(I helped save b3ta! SickRik float like a camembert sting like a brie, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:47, archived)
probably not

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:48, archived)
yes

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:52, archived)
no

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:52, archived)
itloletriwytd

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
All of the above.

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
Are you?

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
That's awesome.

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:56, archived)
Up yer cock

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:57, archived)
Orange.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:05, archived)
I have got a mini hangover. Someone made me stay up late
and plied me with drink.

In other news, bargain!
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:47, archived)
LOL!

(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:47, archived)
i am debating whether to have a beer

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:48, archived)
Yes

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:53, archived)
the rugby is on
but in my mind its too early to drink
(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:56, archived)
2 o clock is too early?
...man up :)
(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:59, archived)
im a terrible drunk though

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:01, archived)
Drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink
drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink drink
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:02, archived)
Speaking of which I'm off to drink booze on the beach

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:03, archived)
see above

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:03, archived)
Is beef burger flavour nice?
I know cold beef burgers aren't nice.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:48, archived)
This is a proper bargain
www.hotukdeals.com/item/421290/any-6-sub-drink-99p-at-preston-subw/

Shame I have to wait a week though..
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:49, archived)
There'll not be many exclamation marks left after that.

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:50, archived)
The daily quota has been used up

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:52, archived)
Pringles are horrible.

(I helped save b3ta! Comma, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:50, archived)
They're scary things.
Also, according to their legal people, they're not even crisps. That's scary too.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:58, archived)
I'm very very tired
And I have to go on a booze train with Ms Official and her pals while they sing shit folk songs with the band that's playing. Grim times ahead.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:51, archived)
Take a book and an ipod. That wouldn't be antisocial or anything.

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:00, archived)
I might just stand by the beer bit and growl at passers by

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:01, archived)
Hello /talk!
I hope you are all well.

I have decided that as I have given up smoking, I should also start getting fit and I am putting together a playlist to run to.

What songs would you suggest for motivation?

Please, no albanian polka music....
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:40, archived)
New prodigy album is good to run to,

(PsychoChomp, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:41, archived)
Oooh!
Good call!
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:43, archived)
I actually run to podcasts.
This American Life and the Savage Love Podcast are my favourites.
(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:41, archived)
I've never really been a podcast type.
Are they talky podcasts?
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:43, archived)
Bonnie Tyler - Total Attack Of The Heart

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:42, archived)
Bonnie Tyler makes me sad face when I actually hear her talk :(

(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:44, archived)
born to be wild

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:43, archived)
Steppenwolf win!

(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:46, archived)
Eye of the tiger
on continuous repeat
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:46, archived)
Pfft!

(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:47, archived)
You're gonna need a montage!

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:50, archived)
jingle bells being barked by dogs

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:47, archived)
Where would I find such a wonderful creation?

(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:47, archived)
Smoke on the water
My Iron Lung
Derek and Clive's Cancer sketch
Lump - Presidents of USA
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:49, archived)
All good calls,
but I think I will leave the cancer sketch as I just want musics :)
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:50, archived)
Were the first two a coincidence?

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
I don't understand?

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:55, archived)
Surely you mean all of them?
Smoke, Lung, Cancer, Lump?

You're so insensitive towards little angLe SSG :(
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:56, archived)
I'll admit
I barely read the posts on here anymore.
(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:04, archived)
SLAM! by pendulum

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:55, archived)
Keep on Running
Running up that Hill
Running on Empty
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 14:51, archived)
I saw someone in Balham wearing a B3ta t-shirt yesterday.
I recognised the face, but had no idea who it was.

WAS IT YOU? ARE YOU THE GIANT ON CRUTCHES??
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:52, archived)
Not me,

(PsychoChomp, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:53, archived)
I might get a b3ta tshirt
Do they do them in fat bastard size?
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:56, archived)
*face palm*

(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:57, archived)
*palms face*
very smooth
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:58, archived)
They'd be missing out on a core demographic if they didn't

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:58, archived)
That's the smallest size they come in.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:58, archived)
As long as fat bastard size is fat bastard size that's alright

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:01, archived)
The next sizes are whale and supertanker.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:04, archived)
Almost certainly wasn´t me

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:58, archived)
Why did you go to him "OI, oi, mate, oi, oi, yo', listen, listen right up, yeah', I'm a b3tan too, innit, so givus your phone, keys, wallet and watch, then fuck off before something nasty happens."

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:58, archived)
i was daaaahn the pub, 'ee was bigger'n me, and my gaggle of burds were 'oldin' me back.
'Eee wasn't wurf it, innit. An' he was tooled up an' all
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:00, archived)
Where's ya' tool?
THIS TOOL !
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:00, archived)
I'm the daddy now.

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:01, archived)
he said Balham, not Peckham.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:00, archived)
twas me.
Remind me where Balham is?
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:59, archived)
London

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:59, archived)
oh
twasn't really me
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:00, archived)
Anyone recommend some decent wedding music for my sister's wedding
She wants some pre-aisle walking music, then some entrance music, then some signing music.

I was hoping to go a bit more modern, as she's currently wading through classical CDs. Something uplifting like Elbow's Day Like This
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:59, archived)
emperors march from star wars for all 3.

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:00, archived)
I remember being impressed
when my brother had that as his ringtone when our mum called him.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:02, archived)
Ain't Nuthin But A G Thang

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:00, archived)
99 Problems!

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:01, archived)
Seriouspost though, you might want to check out some Brian Eno.
Apollo: Atmospheres and Soundtracks could do you very well for such an occasion.
(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:02, archived)
An Ending (Ascent), Always Returning, Deep Blue Day or Silver Morning would work.
Although one of them is in the scene in Trainspotting where Renton dives into the toilet, you might not want that one.
(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:02, archived)
Or some Sigur Ròs.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:04, archived)
I quite fancied having some Ennio Morricone, sort of brooding opening, then the doors burst open as the strings kick in
and my sister walks down the aisle.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:06, archived)
Thanks for the suggestions Easty
Sigur Ros would be a good choice.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:06, archived)
Happy to help.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:08, archived)
pre-aisle I'd have Billy Idol's White Wedding,
then fade that into Rob D's Clubbed to Death for the walk up the aisle,
then for singing music I'd have *thinks*
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:01, archived)
Livin on a Prayer, cos everyone knows that

(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:01, archived)
NO!
Not that. You said signing not singing

I'd have Bic Runga - Sway for that.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:06, archived)
I meant signing the register music
not some cockney knees up 'rand a joanna
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:08, archived)
White Wedding would be a brilliant wedding song.

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:02, archived)
hey little sister
shotgun!
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:03, archived)
The Gonk from the Dawn of the Dead soundtrack.

(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:01, archived)
Smack my bitch up

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:02, archived)
Face Circus.
profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=57268106

All Night Long
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:03, archived)
The Wedding Song
from Tim Burton's Corpse Bride
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:04, archived)
YMCA

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:06, archived)
Yes!

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:09, archived)
let's call the whole thing off
i still haven't found what i'm looking for
yesterday
(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:12, archived)
Hurray!
My cousin and her friend are gone, I have the house to myself again.
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:19, archived)
Back to the camwhoring for you then!

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:24, archived)
I can't go see horses and dogs on Monday because some old randomer has died.
Balls.
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:25, archived)
It was me.
I'm a giant.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:24, archived)
a giant personality
but in a tiny thimble sized body
(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:38, archived)
I like pokemon.
What TV program from your childhood do you still enjoy?
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:28, archived)
I like pokemon too,

(PsychoChomp, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:29, archived)
There are 151 pokemon.
No more. None of that 450 or whatever pokemon shit.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:32, archived)
gotta catch them all

(PsychoChomp, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:33, archived)
the first 150 pokemon (apart from magnemite) are rubbish
all the best ones came afterwards
(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:39, archived)
You fucking idiot.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:41, archived)
face it, all the most boring ones came first
rattatta, spearow, sandshrew, nidoran, paras, venonat, i could go on

all boring and no one likes them
(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:45, archived)
they've even given a lot of them evolutions and baby forms in an effort to make them less dull
chansey, tangela, magmar, elctabuzz and jynx have all had this treatment
(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:00, archived)
I have to agree there, old chap.

(I helped save b3ta! Willwillwritehiswill An arse like a slapped face., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:53, archived)
*cough*
Magikarp? Ekans?
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:41, archived)
Snorlax.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:42, archived)
Farfetch'd is the best!
Farfetch'd is often found in grasslands near rivers and in ponds. They are very good swimmers and always carry leeks with them which they eat in an emergency.
(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:44, archived)
I always carry around an emergency leek for just such an occasion.
And nintendo are remaking gold and silver, which is okay in my book.
(I helped save b3ta! Willwillwritehiswill An arse like a slapped face., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:49, archived)
I got a GBS SP that came with pokemon red rescue team
and I really liked that game. I got pokemon for the DS (pirated, thankfully) and it's much shitter. Seemed more child freindly.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:45, archived)
Platinum's a wee bit better than diamond and pearl
Methinks nintendo are running out of pokemon ideas.
(I helped save b3ta! Willwillwritehiswill An arse like a slapped face., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:52, archived)
but you're still a trainer runnign round catching pokemon
rather than a pokemon running round rescuing pokemon
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:56, archived)
I can't wait for...."Pokemon slightly red'er than ruby but not quite as red as the london tube logo."
With that new pokemon charactor "Dog-that-breaths-fire...ermm...errr...asorious."
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:00, archived)
they've always released an improved third game
there was yellow, crystal and emerald before platinum
(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:17, archived)
Doug.

(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:29, archived)
Well done, the theme tune's in my head now.
I loved Doug.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:30, archived)
Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:29, archived)
SM:TV was great
I was watching some of the current crop of kids morning TV and it's all bum.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:30, archived)
I watched a few Wonkey Donkey clips on youtube the other day.
Still makes me laugh.
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:32, archived)
I never got on with SM:TV or Ant & Dec and I'm not really sure why not.
I remember having to defend this position at school almost daily though.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:34, archived)
I can't remember what the equivilant on BBC was at that time
but I know it was rubbish.

Then that one with Holly Willoughby came along and I watched her boob fall out once. I was probably about 18 or so.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)
It was Live & Kicking at the time I believe.
I doubt I watched either, I was probably too busy listening to music or playing computer games.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:37, archived)
Or on the internet.
None of my friends really had internet access till I was 16, where I'd been using it on my own computer on a network since I was 11.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:38, archived)
Still remember the phone number, as sang by Andy Peters on numerous occasions.
0181 811 81 81
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:43, archived)
I remember when it was 081 811 8181

(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:46, archived)
Yeah, I remember them adding the extra 1.

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:47, archived)
I do recall them having to change it.
Andy Peters made way too much of an issue about it.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:47, archived)
I remember when it was 01 811 8055

(I helped save b3ta! nick the greek, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:13, archived)
haha yes!

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:23, archived)
I once saw Philip Scofield on stage in a large car park at a Radio 1 Roadshow in Westward Ho!
It was absolutely tipping down with rain, so we left after about 15 minutes.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:48, archived)
RUN THE RISK
www.youtube.com/watch?v=XAkx1HZUoyE
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:43, archived)
JOHN LESLEY!
oh dear...
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:47, archived)
Eminemmerdale

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)
The opening theme from Emmerdale,
sounds a lot like the opening theme from the crystal maze.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:44, archived)
Reboot.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:31, archived)
Never heard of that one.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:31, archived)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ReBoot
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:32, archived)
and this...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=jfSqsY6zxFU
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:37, archived)
this

(I helped save b3ta! St. Defenestration The REAL one, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)
I'm a metapod!
Metapod. Metapod metapod. *hardens* Metapod metapod.
(I helped save b3ta! Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:36, archived)
Simpsons
/obvious answer

ARG, there is a program on FIVEUSA called Till Death.. It's got Raymonds brother from Everybody loves Raymond and he has a relatively high voice..

This has ruined everything I thought I ever knew...
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:38, archived)
I know it is, but I never think of that as a kids TV show.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:38, archived)
Yes, this. I don't know why they keep putting it in lists of the greatest kids' TV shows and suchlike.

(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:39, archived)
Yeah all the endless knob gags have the parents up in arms...

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:40, archived)
Transformers!

(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Sp@m, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:43, archived)
Still enjoy?
Trapdoor, Stoppit & Tidyup

I don't have anything else, though would like a copy of Cities of Gold
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:43, archived)
Trapdoor and the old dungeons and dragons cartoon.

(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:45, archived)
lololderthansexface

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:45, archived)
Cutting.

(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:00, archived)
both brilliant

(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:48, archived)
Apart from Uni.
He was a twat.
(I helped save b3ta! nick the greek, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:29, archived)
biker mice from mars

(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:48, archived)
Tintin
I also enjoyed this.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:48, archived)
and Knightmare.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:49, archived)
I remember getting quite exciting where a local landmark was used as the background for one of the end credits

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:53, archived)
Mike and Angelo!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Glg70dobhhE
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:51, archived)
I know Angelo
He can't really walk on the walls you know.
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Entity is in hiding., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 13:19, archived)
Star Trek.
www.daytondailynews.com/news/dayton-news/dog-alerts-local-family-to-fire-dies-in-blaze-159051.html

God, this is a depressing story:(
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:51, archived)
FREE VIAGRA BLUE PILLZ
PENIS ENLARGEMEN

meet and fuck any girl tonight / hi i saw your profile on a daTINNG SITE HERE IS A PIC OF A PORNSTAR JOIN UP AND CHAT TO ME IT MIGHT BE ME LOLZZ I'm on cam later, just use this username and give us your creditcard details

IPHONES

FREE IPHONES
FIILOUT ONLINE SUVEYS FREE IPHONES BLACKBERRY



looks like I've been siging up to the wrong websites :(
(I helped save b3ta! SickRik float like a camembert sting like a brie, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:20, archived)
If I'm doing an internal UK flight (Norwich to Edinburgh for example) would I require a passport?

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:22, archived)
Driving license should do it
the airlines site will tell you
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:24, archived)
Thank you

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:25, archived)
LALALA
I DON'T CARE
SHOVE IT UP YOUR COCK
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:23, archived)
What would YOU do with the drunken sailor?

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:44, archived)
I'll early HIS morning

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:45, archived)
ask him if he knew how to cure cancer

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:46, archived)
Refuse to serve him any more
and hope he fucks off of his own accord.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:46, archived)
Male or female?
Either way sodomy is the answer
(PsychoChomp, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:48, archived)
Play Jenga

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:48, archived)
Nick what's left of his rum.
and give it to Esme.
(I helped save b3ta! The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:48, archived)
Sing a sea shanty.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:49, archived)
milk him

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:49, archived)
don't look at me
he's not my responsibility
(I helped save b3ta! well, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:49, archived)
... anymore.

(I helped save b3ta! Jobe, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:52, archived)
Well, traditionally he may be lashed in front of the rest of the crew
or forces to stand in the riggings for a set period of time. It depended on the captain as to the punishment.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:53, archived)
in his absence, we'll have to go with Mrs Hood Butter's suggestion

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:00, archived)
It would not be uncommon for women to be hidden on board larger ships

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:01, archived)
didnt the carpenters take their wives on board with them?

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:06, archived)
I don't know
Probably. Yeah. Yes. Yes they did. And she had to live in a box made of wolves.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:09, archived)
i think they did, as the carpenter was like a god on a boat
i think they had women to do womanly things...... you kno won a long voyage,

like stitching the sails etc etc
(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:12, archived)
Only if they had a Ticket to Ride

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:09, archived)
Because they want to be Close to You

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:15, archived)
:(

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:15, archived)
well, giant, child-bearing hips would be obvious on a smaller vessels

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:09, archived)
Chevron

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:14, archived)
Shit chevron.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:25, archived)
I'll chevron YOUR chevron in a minute

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:26, archived)
Swing on my chevron.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:29, archived)
Chevron

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:14, archived)
Throw him out the window.
I think.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:58, archived)
I'd feed him more rum
then jar up his sick and sell it
(I helped save b3ta! valoukh newsgash.wordpress.com, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:14, archived)
in blackjacks emblazoned with rare shells
and a conch atop
(I helped save b3ta! valoukh newsgash.wordpress.com, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:16, archived)
Sounds like a perfect new member for SlipKnot

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:18, archived)
Wait until he fell asleep
then nick his wallet
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:18, archived)
I've just realised
I've been sat watching Trooping of the Colour for half an hour. I don't even like trooping of the colour.

Are you happy with the amount of money you have?
I'm not, I'm far too poor.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:22, archived)
I'm currently overdrawn
but I put this down to the recent move, and should therefore be back on form in a month or two.
(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:23, archived)
Minus Lots, bloody student overdraft
£30-35 a month interest kicks in as of next month too. Bugger.
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:24, archived)
Ouch.
When I was a student I rather stupidly opened multiple student accounts, leading to me having a very good first year which involved lots of eating out and drinking. It fucked me up the arse later though.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:26, archived)
Did the bank manager pop round and do this specially?

(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:27, archived)
All five of them.
The chap from RBOS had a particularly large cock.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:27, archived)
Five student accounts?
Now that was a tad silly.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:29, archived)
Yes. Yes it wass.

(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:29, archived)
Also, quite impressive.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:30, archived)
He could have made a tv program like that cock who ran off with 40 grand.

(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:35, archived)
Well, the first one said "do you have any other student bank accounts open at the momnet?"
then five minutes later said "it'll take a few days for your new account to open". So, I figured I had a few days to go around the other banks and not actually lie.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:47, archived)
I have enough to look after me and my girls
I'd like a job before it runs out, though.
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:25, archived)
I have minus £1,250. Get in.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:25, archived)
Just wait 'til you get a mortgage
mmmmm permadebt
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:00, archived)
I should be paid twice what I earn.

(PsychoChomp, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:25, archived)
I know that feeling

(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:26, archived)
I'm quite poor.
But I'm happy enough.
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:25, archived)
I don't owe the bank anything anymore.
I owe the collection company that bought my debt off them quite a lot though. so no, not happy.
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:27, archived)
Top tip:
If you make them a repayment offer they find it very difficult to get a CCJ against you. Work out what you can afford to pay, half it, and offer them that.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:29, archived)
tenner a week from my jsa.

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:32, archived)
Nope,
I'm just about to go into the real world too.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:27, archived)
I seem to be earning enough to drink myself into a stupor every weekend.
and most weeknights.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:27, archived)
'salright, 'spose
one of my employers wants a meeting to discuss my "financial situation", which basically means I get a 50% pay rise or I walk.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:28, archived)
I have enough to get me by for the Summer, then I'll have to sort myself out with a proper job.

(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:29, archived)
i don't know what i would do with more money

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:34, archived)
you'd buy a huge bike with a wicker basket on the front
and ribbons from the handles and wear a gay hat and shout weeeeeeeeee as you go down hills
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:35, archived)
This sounds like a good idea.
I'm currently wearing womens pyjamas, they look like bloomers on me.
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:36, archived)
jeez
whats wrong with you?
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:37, archived)
My pyjamas were in the wash last night.
And after the last time the neighbours walked past, the police will be called if I don't cover up.
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:38, archived)
Wildheart Baby - bed-wetter and proud of it!

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:39, archived)
alright bully

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:41, archived)
eurgh. it's you.

(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:43, archived)
how's the campaign coming along cunty?

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:44, archived)
gathering momentum like an elephant on a skateboard.
shitface.
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:51, archived)
:D

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:54, archived)
you are quite right!

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:46, archived)
Cure pancreatic cancer?

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:40, archived)
I'm almost embarrassed about my work - pay ratio at the moment
its certain to all come crashing down at some point though
/pessimist
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:40, archived)
I have enough money at the moment
was surprised by my bank statement for last month, someone I managed to spend a lot more than I expected.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:40, archived)
Hanging on
by a thread. This last year living on one income before I can go back to work is the hardest.
(I helped save b3ta! moogy boobles, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:58, archived)
I reckon the Queen must be rather bored with it too.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:08, archived)
MORNING Beethreeteeeaye
what are your plans for this lovely Saturday. We aren't doing much, I might get my shorts on and do some gardening.
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Sp@m, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:31, archived)
doin stuff
lol
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:32, archived)
I'm meeting my Dad and his partner for lunch
and then they're coming to take a look at my new flat.
(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:32, archived)
haha
gay dad
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:36, archived)
I could have said girlfriend, but that word seems a little childish

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:43, archived)
Badum Tish

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:55, archived)
My Grandma has a boyfriend
I don't think it's childish. Sound like a whole bottle of ace to me.
(I helped save b3ta! jenpots, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:07, archived)
Quite
Partner sounds like a business arrangement
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 12:01, archived)
Quality jokeage.
Would reply again.
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:04, archived)
Will be underneath a car, replacing big end (ooo errr!) bearing shells.
It's a fun packed oily day.
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:33, archived)
I dealt with perished fuel lines on Thursday
I'm still in bed recovering from petrol poisoning
*cradles vom-bucket*
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:42, archived)
you should try Dr Gilgy's Scampi Flavour Fries detox diet

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:45, archived)
that sounds really fucking tasty actually
I need something supremely salty
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:50, archived)
Doesn't sound particularly pleasant.
I've drank enough oil doing this job to last me a lifetime. Working directly under where the oil sump was is fucking horrible.
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)
I should do some gardening.
It's like a jungle sometimes it makes me wonder, how I keep from going under.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:35, archived)
eating carrot cake
geocaching
putting up some shelves in the bathroom
having some LOVELY curtains put up
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:36, archived)

carrot cake cock
cach cock
shelves cock
bath cock
curtain cock
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:40, archived)
Excellent use of strike out.
*applauds*
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:45, archived)

strike cock
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)
:D

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:53, archived)
*geocaching fives*

(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:26, archived)
I didnt realise this place was called
B3ti
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:42, archived)
ooh b3ti!
(i used to hate that show)
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:43, archived)
i fancy i might sleep for most of it
but need to go to the farmers' market first. possibly make some more drum machines after that
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:42, archived)
Going home from work
Sleeping, playing out on the beer and music train to Ribblehead later, more kip
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:43, archived)
ribblehead is a great insult

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:44, archived)
If you are offended by viaducts

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)
everyone thinks they're such sweet little things
viaducts! viaducts! woosh woosh! woosh woosh!
elegant arches and old stone wallings
viaducts! viaducts! woosh woosh! woosh woosh!
but there's a poison that i must dispense
you think they're lovely but they cause me offence
viaducts! viaducts! woosh woosh! woosh woosh!
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:55, archived)
ok

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:56, archived)
shut it, ribblehead

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:05, archived)
whatever, you massive crumlin!
it's another viaduct, a welsh one
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:12, archived)
i'll be tidying up my filo-fax
then putting all the BINGO tickets in order, great forum
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:46, archived)
I'm going to wonder around london later and spend money I don't really have.
Yesterday I went to borough market and brought the best cheese I've ever had, the biggest artichokes I've ever seen, and loads and loads of other bits. I also went to Harrods to get my favorite lollipops.

I think I might buy a new jacket today, I don't really have a summer jacket at the moment. Marks or BHS maybe... I donno.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:50, archived)
I got some Root Beer and Grape Soda too.
Man, it was quite a good day yesterday.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:51, archived)
didn't even have to use your KA

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:57, archived)
have they got those tiny watermelons at borough market yet?
i was at london bridge at 3, you never called :(((
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:52, archived)
Go to elephant and castle.
Stand there. That is all.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:56, archived)
No elephants, no castles, and I got mugged on the way home, twice.
Worst place in london.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:57, archived)
i used to live near there, that pink shopping centre is awful

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:00, archived)
I think it's the only shopping centre in london that makes Wood Green look good.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:04, archived)
it is utterly awful, even the little bit of market is looked down on by street children in bogata

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:05, archived)
really?
im goign to have to go to wood green now to have a look
(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:05, archived)
Coincidentally, I avoided a mugging by running very fast in E & C.
Walking through a subway, on a Sunday, in the middle of the day. Managed to make the bus that was conveniently about to leave the bus stop.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:01, archived)
wern't me gonz, i work the old kent road

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:04, archived)
i remember new kent road is near the elephant and castle as well

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:07, archived)
not my patch i tell you, i'm more a traditional s/e lahndahn mugger, what what

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:08, archived)
ah so you stick to the tradiontal muggers code do you?

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:10, archived)
oh yes, i never mug one of my own and i never mug old people, it's mainly tourists

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:19, archived)
I didn't see any of them.
Oh man, I didn't realise, you're famous on the internet, I could have scored some cool-points if I had known.

You know 'Finchley Road' on the Juibali line, is that proper-finchley? Because that would be a really easy way for me to get to that part of london, rather than traveling most of the way through the pick-my-willy line.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:56, archived)
I stole my friends name and used is as my new facebook url.
Some daft American had already stolen my actual name.
(I helped save b3ta! Jobe, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:50, archived)
there is some kind of table top sale
over the wall at the bottom of my garden,

so I plan on attempting to buy cake without leaving the boundaries of my home
(I helped save b3ta! chuff monkey I AM him, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:51, archived)
Sellotape a baking tray to a really long stick.
I'm sure this will work.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:03, archived)
doin things
*fist clench*
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:02, archived)
Doing things, with your fist?

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:04, archived)
Hell yes.

(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:15, archived)
Need to write a talk, fill in some applications
and take some golf clubs to the charity shop, unless someone here wants some.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:14, archived)
I love biting the crust off of toast, folding the middle in half and eating it like a big buttery taco.

(I helped save b3ta! The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:15, archived)
So you like the taco eh?
Do you like them with cheese on?
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:17, archived)
I'm going to a /qotw heavy bash later

(PsychoChomp, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 11:15, archived)
So was that syncubus below?
Please explain to me what this character did to earn his sordid reputation. I'm newish ya see, that name crops up a lot, I'd like to know why.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:39, archived)
Furry Dinosaur made a good posting summing him up. Hang on.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:43, archived)
posting? yes, i am searching it with my broadbandings

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:44, archived)
i like the idea of broadbandings

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:12, archived)
oh judge, judge, lawdy lawdy judge, send me to the 'lectric chair

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:12, archived)
why can I never recognise the regular trolls?

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:46, archived)
Because they are all you.
It's like Fight Club, only with more wheezing.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:55, archived)
I'm a completely annoying piece of ass

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:00, archived)
all i can think of is bob from fightclub

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:07, archived)
Let's all dance.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:57, archived)
BOMF BOMF BOMFBOMF BOMF BOMF BOMFBOMF

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:58, archived)
*shapes*

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:58, archived)
*clams*

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:59, archived)
*robot dances*

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:06, archived)
*stands at back, looking surly*

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:08, archived)
*sits in the corner, glaring and setting fire to beermats*

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:17, archived)
*plys underage girls with wdk's and makes rude suggestions*

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:22, archived)
*gets chatted up by the ugliest girl in the room*

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:28, archived)
OH HAI!
chatted felt girl guy
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:32, archived)
I'm not going to feel myself up, you fool

(I helped save b3ta! SuperMatt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:33, archived)
Quit touching yourself then.

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:36, archived)
*performs black-market organ transplants in the loos*

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:29, archived)
He was once a somewhat loveable pervert who liked to link people to pictures of his cock.
Then he went insane when his wife left him and had a really weird masochistic relationship with /talk and then got banned for inappropriate gazzes to kiddies and/or showing people a picture of his cock.

Then he went to prison for indecent exposure.

That's the story as I think maybe it is as I have gleaned it from other b3tans who may or may not be full of shit.
(I helped save b3ta! hanke murphy, I'm a mess, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:44, archived)
plus he was really fucking irritating.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:45, archived)
Yes, that too

(I helped save b3ta! hanke murphy, I'm a mess, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:45, archived)
where did we get this prison rumour from?

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:46, archived)
popular page

(I helped save b3ta! hanke murphy, I'm a mess, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:47, archived)
*click*

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:48, archived)
This is life

(I helped save b3ta! hanke murphy, I'm a mess, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)
I thought he moved to South Africa to be with Boudicca

(I helped save b3ta! DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:46, archived)
Sounds wholly inappropriate.
Charming.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:51, archived)
inappropriate is his middle name
www.b3ta.com/talk/5869481
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:53, archived)
If my memory serves me right
The cock was in a pink sock.....not pretty!
(I helped save b3ta! fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:10, archived)
I think that was part of the banning
but his unshielded cock used to become your mouse pointer when you went to his profile and he used to dupe people into looking at it full frontal on /main all the time.
(I helped save b3ta! hanke murphy, I'm a mess, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:12, archived)
and he's in prison now?
He'll get on well there.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:26, archived)
i have no idea, i pay little attention
BINGO
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:14, archived)
I'd love to take part, I shall be at a barbecue at around 8pm though.
I could be a bit anti-social and take my laptop with me.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:22, archived)
you're going to go out on a saturday night? are you some kind of freak

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:24, archived)
I've often considered commiting myself to the b3ta cause.
I'd have to put a colostomy bag in, get pizza express on speed dial, and eat nachos until I expand to fit my chair.
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:30, archived)
Can smell that retard a mile off.
www.b3ta.com/talk/6221136#post6221150
(I helped save b3ta! Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 10:32, archived)
Good Morning Campers
I smell of fish and ass.
(i_mustnt_panic, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:46, archived)
You've been shagging your mum then?

(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:47, archived)
I smell of bacon and eggs
and a little bit of fish and ass.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:50, archived)
Wow.
User deleted already.

Fantastic.
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:50, archived)
Why have I got a feeling it was syncubus?

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:53, archived)
"Ass"

(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:54, archived)
What an annoying ass!

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:55, archived)
I thought he was in prison

(I helped save b3ta! hanke murphy, I'm a mess, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:20, archived)
I think they have internets in prison

(I helped save b3ta! Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:27, archived)
what happened there??

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:53, archived)
Must've flagged up something.

(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:55, archived)
I'm guessing Syncubus

(I helped save b3ta! mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:53, archived)
A welsh girl?
How strange.
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:54, archived)
eh?

(I helped save b3ta! mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:58, archived)
look at /qotw

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:59, archived)
i read that as well,
something about pigs as well.......
(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 9:08, archived)
Always Wear Gloves When Handling Petrol
*copiously vomits everywhere*
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:56, archived)
So, who here likes being awake?
To be honest I'm not expecting too many answers. I'm filling time between stations on my way to Lancaster. Hello.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 7:04, archived)
hello mr official.
how goes it? I am awake. But only woke up 4 hours(not even!) ago. I'm lazy sometimes me.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 7:10, archived)
It goes well
Despite being at work when I'd rather be in bed. Low passenger levels keep me happy at this time of day.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 7:19, archived)
urrrrrrrrrrgh. I have work in an hour and a bit too. :(
fucksocks.
on the plus side it's not fucking mental freezing cold today! Only fucking freezing cold.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 7:28, archived)
Strike!
We just went over a sheep.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 7:31, archived)
naaaaaah need the money.
That and my boss is a sleaze - he'd probably chuck a fit if I did... ick. /shudder
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 7:32, archived)
not me.
im watching wonder pets. wonder pets is fucking mind rot.
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 7:23, archived)
Go and do something proper then
You fat thief
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 7:27, archived)
The phone, the phone is ringing!

(I helped save b3ta! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:10, archived)
Demons!

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:15, archived)
i dont.
who the wants to talk about their bloody gas bill at 8am?

stupid people. every one should be in bed with a hangover, and not get up until at least 12.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Pilchard The king of B-movies!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:27, archived)
Hippy
Get a proper job
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:29, archived)
like what??
some times i think it would be better to just claim dole money and drink steller all day.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Pilchard The king of B-movies!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:55, archived)
i took my dog to the hairdressers yesterday
he is no longer longhaired. it's great, he looks like a teddy bear

i hope i can get away with this degree of bgn early in the morning
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:31, archived)
I demand that you are on one of my trains in a fortnight.
Aberdeen - York
York - Seamer
Seamer - Filey.

Take your pick.
The last one is only for 8 minutes though.
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:37, archived)
No can do, Toady
That's a long day you've got ahead of you
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:41, archived)
From 8am - 3pm
2 Stops. One at York for 40 mins (At lunchtime, handy for the kids)
One at Seamer for 20 mins.
So not too bad really.
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:43, archived)
Numb arses all round

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:44, archived)
Definitely. But worth it in the end.
We have a table though. Woo.
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:44, archived)
That's great if there are enough of you
I don't book them anymore after falling out with two teachers marking exam papers from London to Leeds.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:47, archived)
There's me, leeann, her two kids and Teggers.
Is there a secret codeword I can say to get preferential treatment and free stuffs?
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:49, archived)
Yes

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:52, archived)
Is it "please"?
I think most workers would die if they heard that word, no matter what the workplace.
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:53, archived)
Just be nice to people
And you will reap your reward in heaven
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:58, archived)
the aberdeen-york train will run 35 minutes late now you've said that

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:52, archived)
Haha.
No doubt.

I'll be taking food with us anyway but it would be nice if there was a chippy or something near the station to get something a bit more substantial.
(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 8:54, archived)
So who here likes cooking?

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 3:54, archived)
I like cooking.
Probably more than I like eating, to be honest. That's a bit of an afterthought on the whole. You have to do it because otherwise after a couple of days you're left with a load of rotting food.

I have almost nothing to do next week, so have already resolved to cook something completely extravagant and ridiculously over the top that I will need to enlist the help of some friends to get rid of. I've no idea what, though. If anybody is still awake at this time, suggestions would be appreciated.
(MooCow_Byter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 4:08, archived)
An entire carvery.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 4:10, archived)
And with that, good night.

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 4:10, archived)
Carverys are the best
The one near me is £3.50, bargainous!
(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 4:11, archived)
Ice cream that looks like meat

(I helped save b3ta! executiverocker only wears C&A, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 4:11, archived)
Gnocchi
I like gnocchi.
Or how about roast quail?
Flea heart ice cream
(I helped save b3ta! Willwillwritehiswill An arse like a slapped face., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 5:24, archived)
do you make the gnocchi yourself?
gnocchi is all of the nom.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 5:33, archived)
I only like it when I'm hungry.
I can take it or leave it otherwise.
(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 4:57, archived)
I like cooking,
s'loads of fun. It's pretty ace getting the raw ingredients to look, taste and smell amazing. I had the best time at work last night - instead of waitressing I had a two hour cooking lesson. /glees
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 13 Jun 2009, 5:32, archived)
I love cheffing or being able to cook alone.
But cooking in a communal house is a pain in the tits.
(I helped save b3ta! Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Sat 13 Jun 2009, 6:33, archived)

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