36°
god fucking lord
(MarkP0rter is an annoying faggot, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:48, archived)

No
Lies
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:50, archived)

Bloody hell, Skipton??
Is Betty's tea house still there?
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:52, archived)

No and it never has been

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:55, archived)

Wait, am I thinking Keighley then?

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:05, archived)

No, Ilkley, thats it.
Aww yeah, Bettys lunches there were amazing
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:08, archived)

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
Good lord, no. That cultural cess pool might get you some underage brutalised fanny or some heroin, but a tea room? Nah. I think you must mean Ilkley or Harrogate.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:08, archived)

A typo, no punctuation and a non-sequitur.
2/10 must try harder.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:50, archived)

nice
(MarkP0rter is an annoying faggot, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 12:30, archived)

Bible Fan Fic?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:51, archived)

fuck off

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:54, archived)

WOAH
HOLY SHIT
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:54, archived)

MASONS AND JEWS!

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:55, archived)

hang on, the alarm went off
/false alarm, back to normal
( The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:12, archived)

I know you're watching me
*preens*
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:15, archived)

Nobody could've predicted weather would have happened!

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:59, archived)

Ha ha, yeah, nice one.
I must tell that to the lads in the pub later.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:04, archived)

What is the secret to success?
I want to be famous. When will I will I be famous?
What do I have to do to become a rich and famous individual (aside from winning the lottery tonight)?
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:09, archived)

MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW MUPPET SHOW
plugin
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:13, archived)

Fresh!

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:22, archived)

no idea
Do you know how to find motivation? I need to study, really need to study, but I can't get my head into gear.
( jenpots, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:14, archived)

Maybe ask a polite gunman to hold a gun to your head.
But they might just threaten to shoot your mum unless you sleep with your dad, as mad gunmen do.
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:23, archived)

hmmm... maybe a hard kick up the arse will suffice.

( jenpots, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:28, archived)

I can help

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:31, archived)

Bend over then.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:32, archived)

bloody hell 0.0
*cowers behind pile of books*
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:44, archived)

*takes a run up*

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:36, archived)

it's been twenty-five minutes, exactly how far back has he run for this? I think it's going to hurt

( vladimir, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:02, archived)

i'm about 3 miles away
right... GO
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:03, archived)

He should be back any second.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:25, archived)

that was uncanny

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:30, archived)

pant... wheeze... gasp...
*collapses 6 feet from jenpots' bum*
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 11:25, archived)

photocopy all your banknotes

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:14, archived)

It's like printing my own money!

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:23, archived)

alternatively, have a successful cartoon series on the internet

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:26, archived)

Cartoons are for kids

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:32, archived)

but it's easier than beating them up for their pocket money

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:36, archived)

KIll an existing rich person
and then steal his skin.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:23, archived)

Be born to the right parents
Or have a prodigious talent. I see a career as a picture framer for you. NEXT!
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:24, archived)

I'll frame them purposely skewiff
so when they go skewiff whilst hung up, it'll actually look right.
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:31, archived)

Muthafuckin science
Right there
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:32, archived)

It's probably easier to achieve infamy
wave your willy at the pope or something
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:26, archived)

I might accidentally bash the bishop

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:31, archived)

I can't answer
I can't answer that.

I am presently resigning from my union as they're a big bag of wank. I am joining another one which isn't.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:31, archived)

I sacked the RMT after their last daft show of sabre rattling
Now I buy my own diary and they still negotiated a 5% pay increase on my behalf. Bargain.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:33, archived)

I've never met my UNISON rep.
She doesn't answer my emails, I've never been to a branch meeting, they were to organise the coaches to the Stop The Cuts march in London and they fucked that up. I'm sacking them off for Unite instead. At least I've spoken to the bloke from them and he's already kept me up to date with the support for the strikers on Thursday.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:38, archived)

I'm not in a union. I want to be.
I'll strike until one accepts me.
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:45, archived)

In eight years of membership there were two branch meetings
Fuck em
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:48, archived)

I'm not terrbly happy that the union i was invited to join
lumps us in Catering in with the tobacco industry. How does that work?
Not sure i like it
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:42, archived)

How queer

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:48, archived)

annexe the rhineland

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:53, archived)

not sure if anyone already pointed that one out
but if you cant become a celeb just kill a celeb
(MarkP0rter is an annoying faggot, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:56, archived)

another wonderful day begins, good morning one and all, except him, i cant fucking stand him

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 7:20, archived)

is he watching?

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 7:26, archived)

i hope not, we dont need his type round here

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 7:27, archived)

Someone should tell him.

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 7:32, archived)

i'm not sure whose remit that would be

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:27, archived)

You have a crush on an office buddy?
Awwww that's sweet!

Try giving him a dead arm. That'll let him know you're interested.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:59, archived)

i work alone, part of my remit

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:07, archived)

i work alone, part of my personal hygiene

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:11, archived)

How's the incubating?

( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 7:43, archived)

still cooking, no signs of life yet

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 7:45, archived)

Yeah, cool, sweet as

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:32, archived)

nice one

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:37, archived)

That's the spirit.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:35, archived)

i lol'd
www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&f=210&t=1017090&mid=0&i=0&nmt=How+to+troll+a+dating+website......&mid=0
( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:52, archived)

Very good.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:54, archived)

I had to stop looking at that as I can't be lol'ing all over the shop at a customer site.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:00, archived)

i started lolling, then i saw the dead eyes in that dog and i rolf

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:09, archived)

That nearly tipped me over the edge,
too much.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:14, archived)

the bumhole bit on page 3 made me pmsl

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:26, archived)

HI GUYZ

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:44, archived)

Alright li'l bro.

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:48, archived)

morning
sleep well?
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:52, archived)

Not really.
I kept waking up. It was rubbish.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:00, archived)

i only woke up the once, and that was because my alarm went off
still rubbish though

in other news: DUCK SIM 2008
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:14, archived)

Hai

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:55, archived)

HEY YOU GUYS

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:08, archived)

HI AARDY

( sleepybinky, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:08, archived)

YO BINKY BUNKY

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:22, archived)

HIYAA

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:13, archived)

HEY 'LITH

( sleepybinky, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:08, archived)

MORNING 'INKY

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 10:11, archived)

Morning mongy C,
can I call you mongy C?
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:58, archived)

if you like, i'm not one to judge

( mongychops, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:10, archived)

chopz, chopper, mongsy, m-dog, m-trip, lil mongy C starr?

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:18, archived)

MC Hops

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:20, archived)

Haha!

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:24, archived)

Morning all
The radio on the desk behind me is playing Smooth Radio. What do I do?

Just keep the headphones on ALL FUCKING DAY / WEEK?
Ask politely that they turn it the fuck off?
Fuckedy fuck?
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:03, archived)

But then you'll miss Pat fucking Sharp.

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:09, archived)

Sharp what? glass? used needles?

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:11, archived)

Embrace the smoothness,
I'm smoother than Action Man's groin, oh yeah.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:14, archived)

I've got flower and heart shapes
all over my bum.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:20, archived)

Radio FIP is where it's at, holmes

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:31, archived)

as in french stuff?

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:34, archived)

Weeelll, a leeeettle french stuff
But it is all really good music.
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:37, archived)

I'd prefer O.U.R Radio
As you know what that does.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:38, archived)

Give it a try, you'll either love it or gouge out your SmoothFM-coworker's eyeballs
It's a win-win situation
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:41, archived)

yep.
definitely french.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:54, archived)

oh hee hoh hee hoh
*waggles eyebrows*

It's good for you, let it wash over you like the sea on a warm summer's day or something.
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:56, archived)

Seems nice enough, I might do that.
Mind you, all my protesting, it's Cricket on Sky Player from 12.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:57, archived)

Frisbee Is Pointless?

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:38, archived)

Shut it, Manny
You ice-cream failure
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:40, archived)

easy, tiger

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:47, archived)

*yawns and stretches*
If anybody needs me I'll be laid out across the keyboard...zzzzzzzzzzzzz
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:55, archived)

don't worry
nobody needs you
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:58, archived)

I heard he called you a cunt the other day.
Just out of nowhere. Massive cunt, he said.
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:05, archived)

harsh but fair

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:07, archived)

Heeey
I resent that statement!
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:22, archived)

totally still awake over here

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 2:23, archived)

well cocks to you then

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 2:51, archived)

爪口尺弋氐心
山口爪阝肝
工弓
氐
匚口匚长
( Zuowan, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 4:43, archived)

I hope that says what I think it says!

( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 5:01, archived)

讦
刃口巳弓
( Zuowan, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 5:04, archived)

Well done that man!

( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 5:05, archived)

here.

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 5:26, archived)

my left arm is numb.

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 5:37, archived)

still here

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 7:15, archived)

not queer

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 7:22, archived)

Right, let's have some serious internet.
Who would you ban?
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:44, archived)

anyone who tried to spam

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:45, archived)

Like a certain non-sport-promoting legal-assistant?

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:47, archived)

did he try to sell things?

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:47, archived)

Yeah.
Sure, why not.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:50, archived)

so why mention him?

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:55, archived)

Because it's late and I'm tired.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:58, archived)

i wish there was a themetune to it being late and being tired

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:00, archived)

I tell you who I'd ban from leaving, and that's GMoS!
What a chap!
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:45, archived)

Always in are harts.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:46, archived)

i sometimes see him pop up on some part of the internet and i want to say hi but i get nervous
then occasionally he says hi and i squeal like a girl with excitement.
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:47, archived)

Sometimes we go over shit on MSN..
He keeps his finger on the pulse.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:50, archived)

he could put his finger on my pulse

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:55, archived)

Always in R brooms.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:32, archived)

Your fucking face you fat shitty hippy.
Or probably no one really, because this place is like a mortuary as it is. I don't think it's in our interests to decrease the population still further.
But yeah, mostly your face.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:47, archived)

When you go on holidays you sing "Oh I do like to be the seaside..."
Because you're so fat.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:49, archived)

I don't understand your joke so I'm not going to get dreadfully UPSET ONLINE
you little fucking prick.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:50, archived)

Shut it, you slag.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:51, archived)

What the fuck?
What the fuck did you say to me you little shit?
I just can't believe you went there.
I just CAN'T believe you went there, and here, of all places, in public.
Do you think you're fucking clever?
Well do you?
Fucking little spazhound.
I'm going to brainwound you so hard you literally won't know what hit you.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:01, archived)

Oi, get a room you two.
The flirting's getting a little shameless now.
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:03, archived)

Out of the way, youngster.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:06, archived)

Watch it grandad, she'll snap you in half.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:07, archived)

www.politics.ie/media/163995-michael-healy-rae-won-celebrity-programme-after-3600-calls-dail-phone-mail.html
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:07, archived)

Quick poll, everyone.
Dr Preference aside, does anyone here give a single shit about irish politics?
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:17, archived)

I care in a vague large scale events type way but I don't really know very much so the bits of infighting don't interest me.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:19, archived)

The LOVELY Tee Eff Dee: VOICE OF REASON!
*Panders*
I'm going to be drinking in That Oxford on Thursday and would like to buy you a drink if you're free that afternoon / evening.
This invitation also applies to The LOVELY Windy Pig, The LOVELY Wynoh, The LOVELY Hankster(assuming that he still lurks occasionally) and any other LOVELY Oxfordshire or nearby based /talk types who may be able to attend.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:41, archived)

Sounds excellent.
I'm free that day so whenever you fancy. I shall gaz you my number as long as you don't use it for creepy purposes. Promise?!?
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:43, archived)

HURRAH!
:D
I'm only a BIT rapey and ever so slightly creepy.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:46, archived)

In fact it's probably safer for you if I just GAZ you mine.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:50, archived)

Can't promise
but Gaz me time and place and a secret code for recognising you in the flesh and i'll see what i can do.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:46, archived)

I'll be the one with a penguin hanging from my trousers.
I usually drink in the Glouc but am willing to meet pretty much anywhere that I don't have to wear a suit or smart shoes and stuff.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:49, archived)

I vote Turf.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:53, archived)

Is it tourist season or Student season at the Turf?
Student season is easier because at least they seem to know how to order from the bar, even if they are all drinking piss weak lager.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:02, archived)

It's exams and tourist season unfortunately so worst of both worlds.
But they do have the best selection of beers in the city centre.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:09, archived)

True, 10 handpumps is hard to beat
Have you been to Far from the Madding Crowd, they've got 6 handpumps, and although a little more expensive it's a better atmosphere and the beer has never been bad. (first pub i ever worked in so possibly biased)
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:14, archived)

Do you really live in OX3?
What's your pizza restaurant? I need somewhere to go to eat tomorrow, is it any good?
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:51, archived)

I am in OX3 at my borthers while my house is being done
Was living in Summertown, bought a house in Osney but i work in Witney. Well, when i can walk i work in Witney.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:58, archived)

Nice nice.
Is Witney a bit of a dump? It always seems a trifle dull to me. Excellent pizza though?
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:06, archived)

Witney is O.K
It sure fucking beats Abingdon. But yeah, typically dull Market town with attached council estate. It's amazing the change from lovely sunday afternoon shopping on the high to full on brawling on saturday night. I'm looking to get out of restaurants and back in to some sort of lovely village pub i reckon. I'm not cooking anymore, went front of house to escape the stress, but i can vouch for my head chef and his team as damn good.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:10, archived)

Just down the road from me in Cartoonton then.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:06, archived)

I have been to Carterton once
was running a little gastro-pub in Cassington and fell asleep on the bus home. Luckily you have friendly bar-staff in whichever pub it was i stumbled in to.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:12, archived)

off to bed now Oxford Sub-thread
And to anyone else still awake i wish you a good night. Go to bed soon, or, if you're time zone allows, go out and enjoy the sun.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:31, archived)

Goodnight, flatulent porcine.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:36, archived)

G'night chap.
Woah, crew just coming in.
Later /talk.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 2:07, archived)

I'd ban everyone in the world except me and you, and I'd make the site have webcams in member's showers, and a transportation device that'll warp me....
... and then I'd invent a device that translate my creepy comments to "hello, how are you?"
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:51, archived)

Hi Gonz, how's it going?
I wouldn't mind because I really only have baths so it probably wouldn't apply to me.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:54, archived)

I'm doing good thanks ! Been looking at stuff for my new digs I'm gonna get over the next couple of months, well excited, gonna get all mortgage'd up and all that.
I love a nice warm bath, but always have a shower after. But I don't mind watching you in the shower or the bath, I'm easy going on that, it's up to you =)
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:00, archived)

whoah hold on is this a jewish thing,
bath and shower? yet your sort always look so grubby.
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:02, archived)

I'd sort of rather you didn't watch me if it's alright with you.
I'm glad your new place is going well. I wish I had somewhere real to live or a job or something. That'd be great.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:04, archived)

That's fine, I can understand that.... oh man, I just got what you mean, I meant letting me watch you bath AS FRIENDS, hahah, yeah' right like I.... with you....hahaha. As mates.
Thank you, something will pop up for you to, are you done with uni now?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:34, archived)

I get my results on Wednesday so not quite all finished, there could be corrections to do, but yeah, essentially I'm looking for lovely jobs now.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:44, archived)

Sounds good, you'll be sorted in no-time =)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:56, archived)

Thanks lovely.
You'll make someone a wonderfully supportive husband someday.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:10, archived)

Come to Oxford on Thursday Gonzy.
:D
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:18, archived)

way to use up all the water

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:01, archived)

I'm formally inviting you to Oxford on Thursday Gobbo. You may bring your Son The Doveston and your Daughter The LOVELY Jaction if you like.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:17, archived)

Rob, just to see if the site imploded as a result.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:48, archived)

Me
I'm dull and have nothing to contribute at all.
(wimbley is feeling hungover, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:48, archived)

We noticed.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:49, archived)

Hahaha fucking hell.
/ac
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:51, archived)

That goes for most of us really.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:49, archived)

Google

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:50, archived)

Are you the one that comes on here and occasionally gets grumpy or is that the one with the similar username?
I can never tell you two apart.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:52, archived)

Actually, while we're asking questions
why do you have such similar usernames. Is it like matching jewellery? LOLGAY.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:55, archived)

He gets upset when he's told to fuck off

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:56, archived)

Silly little munchkin.
I do find it funny when people come on b3ta and then get seriously internet hardmanningly upset about being called a cunt. Does anyone really give that much of a shit?

Do you for example, you cunt?
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:03, archived)

some people don't like the word cunt
they really despise it. i don't understand why
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:25, archived)

Misogynists probably.
I would also suggest that if you really hate the word cunt then b3ta probably isn't the place for you.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:26, archived)

i would have to agree with you there

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:00, archived)

I thought they both did that.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:04, archived)

Is QOTW autism something you are
or something you become after being subjected to it for too long?
I might stop reading it.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:07, archived)

Quite possibly.
Are there actually two different accounts or am I just getting confused.

Who really cares I guess, it's not like this little twazzack is going to bother to reply.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:08, archived)

I dunno, one of them got really upset with me for suggesting it stole its name off the other one though.
That amused me for a few minutes.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:15, archived)

anybody who cannot complete a crystal maze style challenge room for me

( Lightguy hail satan, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:52, archived)

Physical, mental, mystery or skill?

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:53, archived)

riverdance

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:54, archived)

arguably that's all four

( Lightguy hail satan, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:01, archived)

_{AaAaAAaAaaAaAAA}^aaaaaAA_aaaaA^RRRr_rrRrRRrRrdvAAAaaAAaAaAAaaAaaAAaaaAaAAaArRrRrRRrrRr^k!!!!!!!!!!!!!^!!!!!!!!_!!!!!!!!!
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:08, archived)

:D
It's-a me!
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:31, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtYZLOh7rxQ
( Lord Gnome, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:34, archived)

You're my wife now.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:38, archived)

How the hell did they get away with that?
I presume it was because no bugger actually watched it while it was on.
( Lord Gnome, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:39, archived)

No idea.
Though compared to bits of Nighty Night it's quite tame.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:51, archived)

:D
aAaAaAaAAaaAaaAAAaaAaAAAaaAAaAAArRRRrr^RrRrRrrRd_vaAAaAAAAAaAAaAAAaaaAaAaaaAAAAaaaaAa_AaaAAaaa^RRrR^rRrrk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:36, archived)

Hello the lovely stuj!

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:37, archived)

'Ning your AWESOMENESS.
:D
Damn, I'm busy tonight. Although I've wasted time putting together briefing packs for two crews who haven't bothered to tell anyone that they've cancelled their flights. Bloody contractors. *Mutter, grumble*
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:44, archived)

They deserve no better than death.
Stone them into a bloody pulp for wasting your time.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:48, archived)

I've found you a theme tune
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tDJe4gmxlbI&feature=fvst
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:36, archived)

That's fantastic
And I'm not an aardvark.
( Lord Gnome, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:38, archived)

I'm afraid Joe Raposo overlooked Reichsfuhrer von Gnome
when he was writing his catchy children's songs. Possibly Lord Gnome would have been more feasible but i'm not hopeful. Sorry.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:41, archived)

I have heard this and it makes me smile every time.
Thanks! :D
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:39, archived)

Frisboy?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=KAHG2zxX_rE
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:11, archived)

not only would this man be banned, he'd be trapped forever in a hall of mirrors

( Lightguy hail satan, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:23, archived)

I think this one might be Sammi
www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4GgXzoZ3mo&NR=1
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:15, archived)

Fucking fantastic.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:28, archived)

The end makes watching all the pointless flailing completely worth it.
I bloody love The Crystal Maze.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:46, archived)

That's simply wonderful.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:04, archived)

The crystal maze is an incredible showcase of idiots,
in a hilarious manner, interspersed with the occasional flash of genius. It's no wonder we like it, same as here.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:23, archived)

Autisms
All of them
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:53, archived)

I did ban someone earlier from a forum I moderate.
Told him to take a couple of months out, calm down and come back later and talk to me.

That was after he sent me the charming message "Fuck you faggot," but I'm not really a vengeful type- which was why I told him to take some time out and cool off.
( Lord Gnome, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:08, archived)

You've gone power mad, you fucking despot.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:18, archived)

I know- it goes right to my head,
Still- picked up another 125 subscribers today.

[Edit] Looking at the traffic stats we've had 2k hits in the first 24 hours from 464 unique addresses.
( Lord Gnome, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:19, archived)

Fuck you faggot

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:24, archived)

Take a couple of months out to calm down.
Temperatures are running quite high all round at the moment and I'd rather not exacerbate the situation. If you feel the same way at the end of August then have a chat with me and we'll see if we can't get to the bottom of it and sort it out.

In the meantime, have an enjoyable summer and I'll talk to you later.

Best wishes,
( Lord Gnome, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:29, archived)

am i banned now?

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:44, archived)

No
I doubt you would find that forum unless you went out of your way to look for it.

In which case I would ban you- for a laugh.
( Lord Gnome, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:58, archived)

*Smoke bomb*
Nobody. Everyone's too LOVELY to ban.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:33, archived)

awww *hugs the affectionate stuj*

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:44, archived)

'Ning The LOVELY Womby.
:D
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 28 Jun 2011, 1:05, archived)

It's funny when Mortal Wombat posts a new thread then takes 10 minutes to return to check how it's going..
Let's not make any more fun of him. Or he might cry.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:33, archived)

Somebody mentioned Cricket.. Below.
Handsome Gav wants to try a night at the 20/20..
Plan is to get smashed, then maybe run on and have a bat.
Who's with me?
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:34, archived)

*pads up*

( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:34, archived)

HOLY SHIT, A LION

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:37, archived)

It sounds like a fairly good plan
as long as you keep in mind that at least 3 of the guys are wearing helmets and 2 are carrying bats. Know the danger, win the battle.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:41, archived)

I'm very hard.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:42, archived)

Are we cybering?
Because I don't think I agreed to this. Is this Internet rape?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:42, archived)

*A 90nz0 enters the room*

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:43, archived)

try a night at t 20?
TRY? what?
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:43, archived)

HALF FIVE ON A FRIDAY AFTERNOON!
Oh boy...

I'd have to get a last train home, unless I find a designated driver.
:(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:44, archived)

maybe he'll enjoy it and be CONVERTED

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:45, archived)

I'm just going to stop replying to him JMG.
If everyone followed suit, he'd soon get bored and that would make for better internet.
( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:34, archived)

yeah fuck off
you tried to add me as a friend on facebook don't get narky just because i told you to do one
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:35, archived)

Told me to do one?
You mean accept my friend request then delete me?
BOY! THAT SURE SHOWED ME!!
*yawn*
( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:36, archived)

Don't worry mns, we're all here for you at this difficult time.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:37, archived)

so, what's imaginationland like these days?

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:37, archived)

Surely you'd know, what with it being where your girlfriend lives and where you work.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:38, archived)

you're right i'd have to visit imaginationland
to have my girlfriend fucked up the arse by SF
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:40, archived)

imaginary girlfriend, let's not forget

( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:43, archived)

That really wasn't a very good zing MW.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:43, archived)

he's a WRITER you know

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:45, archived)

That'll be why he hasn't got any in three years then.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:46, archived)

It wouldn't have been a good zing 3 years ago.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:46, archived)

sorry watching peep show

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:49, archived)

Well, thank you for the apology at least.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:51, archived)

Hold on..
You add friends from b3ta on Facebook?
Hahaha..
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:45, archived)

haha facebook fanpage haha lol bald

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:46, archived)

Oooof, you WENT there.
There are just some things it's not kind to point out MW.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:48, archived)

i would feel so ashamed if something that happened to basically all men
happened to me, a man,
how embarassing!
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:59, archived)

I had a period once. I was MORTIFIED.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:06, archived)

spare me your life story

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:27, archived)

That's not friend finding on Facebook, though..
That's a fan page, about me.. JMG!
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:48, archived)

..and you still haven't calmed down.
:(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:49, archived)

i bet he's GUTTED

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:44, archived)

The internet turns in to a silly place, when one of them takes things seriously..
:(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:36, archived)

it's pathetic how you post above me every night
it seems you're actually wating for me to post before posting above me, you sad spastic
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:34, archived)

I really don't..
You've got it in your head that I do.
You've got to let it go. I don't care.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:35, archived)

yeah yeah whatever you sad twat

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:36, archived)

I'm being completely nice, and you're getting wound up again over nothing.
Absolutely nothing.
You silly little man.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:37, archived)

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:32, archived)

( FIEND, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:37, archived)

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:39, archived)

CHEVRON RUINER!

( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:02, archived)

Ooooh yeah.
Look at us using MW's thread just like he used all those kiddies. I'm going to stick my chevron right up here. That'll teach him.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:20, archived)

BOING!

( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:03, archived)

I HATE YOU MNS

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 0:18, archived)

mini chevron with a thread all to itself!
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:45, archived)

Wimbledon..
It's getting me by without the football..
How are you coping in the build up to pre-season?

It's almost time for Copa America!
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:22, archived)

Of course, I'd like to see Murray win Wimbledon...

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:23, archived)

I don't really follow wimblydome
but I don't really like murray, he's not a nice chap like that last one
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:25, archived)

I don't think there's many nice sporting superstars..
:(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:26, archived)

amy williams seems to have a lovely face

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:33, archived)

Canny form..

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:35, archived)

I like that some people are chanting
"COME ON TIM" during his matches.

Bonus pig fact: Tim Henman's dad used to live next door to my dad and once slept on our sofa when he locked himself out of his house while his wife was away.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:28, archived)

By watching River Plate fans smash the shit out of their stadium.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:24, archived)

That was a bit ropey, like..
See them all rush on in the first leg to "offer advice" to the players?
Scary..

Mad, those Argies..
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:25, archived)

With testosterone and anger pumping, wont be long before they go for the Falklands again....

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:27, archived)

It's the first time they have been elegated in 110 years
Unlike Newcastle where it's a biannual event.

/Leeds fan who should really shut up about this sort of shit.
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:29, archived)

I'm coping well thanks JMG
kind of you to ask.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:24, archived)

*Firm handshakes*

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:25, archived)

no world cup for jmg?

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:25, archived)

Lasses..
I can't get excited about their football.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:25, archived)

i have tickets to the olympic womens football final, my kids wil fucking love it or else

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:26, archived)

Is this in your remit?
koibirth.blogspot.com/
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:33, archived)

I've been enjoying kicking stuff at shit.
It usually slakes my sporting desires.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:26, archived)

I make do with cricket in the meantime
Although I do actually watch test cricket in preference to football when they clash.

Wimbledon? That's when I appreciate having the Sky Sports channels.
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:27, archived)

Are you a fan of the T20 stuff?
I've come to enjoy it after a sceptical start.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:29, archived)

Not really.
I understand why it's popular but I'd rather watch a 5-day match or even 50 overs a side if they have to be limited.

That's just my preference though.
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:31, archived)

I agree
Test matches are proper cricket, and a good one day is great.
But as a way to fill the days when there is little else it is still good cricket at times.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:35, archived)

Try cricket*
*May be boring
(wimbley is feeling hungover, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:27, archived)

what's for supper?
do any of you still do supper?
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:21, archived)

Not feeling terribly hungry
But if I do fancy a bite I guess I might finish off the Pad Thai I made earlier rather than keep it for tomorrow.
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:24, archived)

I had sausage butties
and old speckled hen.
( CowJam, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:33, archived)

What's your favourite apple?
I like Greensleeves or James Grieve
( spesh., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:28, archived)

An apple question after all that ifighting down there?
I like granny smith.

If this was a sexual preference question I hit two birds with one stone.
( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:30, archived)

I like all apples equally.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:30, archived)

Fucking Hippy

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:32, archived)

Except the Brayburn, which you like more equally, 'cus your a decent person.
BraynBurn is what you get if you eat too many and it gives you acid refulx.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:33, archived)

I dunno, if I had to choose one it'd most likely be Gala.
Just the right sweetness.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:34, archived)

I can't remember what that one is like.
I totally dig all melons though, I could eat them all day long.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:37, archived)

pffft, melons eh? i bet you do

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:39, archived)

Can't go wrong with a couple of nice, firm melons.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:44, archived)

Why stop at 2?

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:55, archived)

you'd probably get the shits, i can link to a picture of a women being shitted (or shat) on if you would like? the mods are asleep i feel

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:01, archived)

They haven't done anything about my terrible racism, so they must be.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:06, archived)

i think the mods are mostly racist, the site is littered with racist images and comments by the mods in neither an funny or ironic manner, it just looks tired

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:10, archived)

Do you feel it would educate me as to the dangers of too many melons?

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:23, archived)

they call it a waist because you can fit at least two more boobs in there.

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:02, archived)

you could just go out with fat chicks, you pervert

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:04, archived)

these are called love handles

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:05, archived)

haha

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:07, archived)

Have you seen Total Recall?

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:07, archived)

Deffo, just noshed a whole packet of ASDA Mellon Medley instead of eating tomo's lunch that I said down there.
Not enough watermellon in ratio, but still very good.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:09, archived)

Watermelon is the best melon.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:10, archived)

You ever Vodka'ized it? You cut a hole in the top and fill the hole with vodka, leave it in a fridge for half a day and the vodka would be soaked through.... keep on doing for a week 'till the bottle is gone.
Well nice way to get pissed.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:12, archived)

I have always wanted to try this
but don't have the self control to let either a watermelon or a bottle of vodka last long enough.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:16, archived)

Get a mate involved in on it for a BBQ.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:21, archived)

and an egg right down the middle,
how do they do that?
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:39, archived)

it's a "long egg"
try mining an entire large pie. very odd to wear an eggy halo.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:41, archived)

I thought you would be more an Aga type

( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:35, archived)

*confuses*

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:36, archived)

Same thing.
www.rayburn-web.co.uk/?gclid=CJn0n6aH16kCFcIMfAodlyunzg
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:44, archived)

Ahhhhh, coolio.
Given the unlimited budget, I'd have a Range Master, my Ma' has one and it's the best oven/hob I've ever used.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:51, archived)

Sounds like a really bad super hero
So I'm in.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:52, archived)

*Ma with a Rangemaster fives*
You know what Gonz, I don't rate them.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:53, archived)

this shit just got real

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:55, archived)

I'm a Bosch/Siemens fanboi.
How do you like them apples?
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:01, archived)

if their domestic appliances are as good as their trade products i wouldn't chose to use them

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:03, archived)

Mongs, you might be able to anwer this, just ballpark figures.
In my new digs there is a partition wall, between the kitchen and the living room. Feels like cardboard or whatever when you tap it, should be easy to knock down. The flooring is the same in the two rooms.

How much do you reckon it would cost to knock it down and put in maybe something like constentina doors? The wall is about 2-3m long and however high a standard room is.

I'd guess I would have to do something about the flooring of the point where the wall currenty is too, don't know what exactly, but they'd be a sofa over the floor gap most of the time so it's no big deal if it doesn't match properly.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:12, archived)

Hire a QS if you want construction cost advice.
Skinflint cunt.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:15, archived)

Got a builder looking at the place this week to give us a break-down and estimation, trusted family friend and all that.... I was just wondering if Mongs has a ballaprk.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:18, archived)

Oh mongy, they're so much better than the power tools.

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:15, archived)

I have a Rangemaster double hob, double oven and extractor fan combo.
It's alright, but I agree. It's no Bosch/Siemens.
( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:06, archived)

Sweet ! I'm not sure what model she's got, but it's got 4 normal and 1 really big burner, and the oven has a big one (with a shelf on the door) and a small one...
... which is perfect for her, she only uses the big one at Christmas, so she's never paying shitloads to run it. I think it's this one here in black.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:05, archived)

I love the look of those ones that look just like a flat glass surface with red rings that heat up almost instantly, forgot what they're called and never used one, but they look good.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:07, archived)

Induction Hobs
We use them a lot in the restaurant for pastry as you get the most even heat across the base of the pan possible.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:09, archived)

PASTRY IN A PAN?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:14, archived)

Tart-ta-Tan, I made one a couple of weekends ago, was well lush.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:15, archived)

Reminds me of
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARfARi-gpWc
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:17, archived)

do you boil the meat before you put it in?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:20, archived)

well, tarte tatin as mentioned already
and when melting things, or caramelising, or reducing, if you have evenly distributed heat you don't get hot-spots so you can wander off and do something else and it won't burn so easily.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:22, archived)

That's the one ! You work in a resturant? What kind?
I think they look the buisnes.

In my new place, I'd also like taps you can turn on/off with your elbows, and I'd love one of those instant hot-water taps (what are they called? how much are they?).
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:14, archived)

Currently working in a rather lovely little pizzeria
I've just bought a house and we're having the kitchen done, and I'm having loads of fun making it perfect for cooking at home. It's basically going to be a mini version of a proper restaurant kitchen as that's the only way i know how to cook. Taps with elbow control, racks for knives and chopping boards. But price has me stuck down to hotpoint gear as i am not a rich man.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:20, archived)

Sweet, sounds good.
Do you mean those magnatized strips when you say knife rack? If so, I want one. Decent chopping board are pretty ace, I got some wooden ones for about £15 each but they already started to split with dishwasher use. I think it'll be sweet to get a granit block for the oven too.

My fave kitchen I've seen on telly is Nigel Slatter's one in that food-for-a-week show he does, I wrote him an email over the weekend and his publicist is gonna pass it on. I think he's a great man, love his views on life/food.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:27, archived)

I'm definitely with you on Nigel Slatter.
And yes on the knife racks. Chopping boards never last long, but i use plastic ones, again i think just out of habit from work.
Granite block for the oven, I hadn't even thought of that. Totally gonna find a way to get one of those in to the budget.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:32, archived)

Sweet, I think plastic is more hygeenic too, but there is something nice about cutting bread on wood.
The granet block is ace, I've not tried it but seen them use it to create a base for something like a pizza-oven, you can get them cheap from places like B&Q.

Another chef who I really admire is Micheal Canes. My friend pointed out his hand after I was watching him on telly for a year or soo and I never realised. He's _that_ good.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:40, archived)

shit temperature control you can easily burn milk on them

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:11, archived)

Must be easy to clean though, donno how much they are when they go wrong, thinking about it.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:17, archived)

knickers
Pink Lady or Jazz

Brayburn are just too inconsistent.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:40, archived)

it's a shame you don't apply that philosophy to all races and genders.

( spesh., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:33, archived)

yes she should adopt a more appley philosophy

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:35, archived)

Alright. Where's a good place to buy black turtle necks?

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:36, archived)

I dunno but I got mine from H&M.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:37, archived)

NOW HE IS HAVING A DIG AT BLACK TURTLES
MMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!1
( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:40, archived)

It's always the racist ones....
That's how I spot them.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:45, archived)

I bet you like the lighter coloured ones better.

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:52, archived)

Golden Delicious.
Don't judge me.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:31, archived)

They aren't golden and delicious is an opinion.
They should be called redder than most, but taste different and maybe better.
( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:42, archived)

*Likes golden delicious fives*
I'm judging you, and it's all good.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:54, archived)

I'm a Braeburn man.
simple but satisfying.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:32, archived)

fuji apples

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:32, archived)

I've found they are the watermelon of the apple world

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:07, archived)

Quite fond of a pink lady.

( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:32, archived)

GET IN
Goodest choice. well done.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:41, archived)

They are good aren't they?
Only fucking apple mentioned here that has to pass tests to achieve the name.
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:46, archived)

They can be too sweet if i think about it...
but they're just totally irresistible. Them and Jazz.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:47, archived)

Jazz you say?
Guess I must be In a Sentimental Mood.
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:52, archived)

smooth

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:57, archived)

and
casual.
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:05, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FvAqohYOp8
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:06, archived)

+1

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:07, archived)

Red delicious.
I used to call them Snow White apples.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:34, archived)

Because you're relatives were trying to poison you with them?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:35, archived)

I like them but I often find them disappointingly mushy inside.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:36, archived)

I know what you mean.

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:51, archived)

Orleans Reinette
Trufax.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:35, archived)

i haven't seen so many people come out of the woodwork in a while, how'd you like them apples, lulz

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:37, archived)

I may have just saved the board

( spesh., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:41, archived)

with a food thread, think on

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:42, archived)

it was more horticultural tbf

( spesh., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:43, archived)

I bet there's never been a thread about the commercial cultivation of pomaceous top fruit

( spesh., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:45, archived)

i bet there has, these foody cunts will talk any old bollocks if they can eat at the end

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:52, archived)

I might start one about hop picking, see who the pikeys are.

( spesh., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:54, archived)

They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away.
So how come Steve Jobs has cancer?
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:39, archived)

I thought he was just a bit of a brain wrong.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:40, archived)

as in I'M BRIAN WRONG?

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:41, archived)

Pleased to meet you, my name is Lizzie.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:43, archived)

because he didn't see a doctor for ages.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:40, archived)

BA DUM CHAAAAA

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:44, archived)

Too many apples give you cancer.
Like everything else, ever.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:45, archived)

Apple Corps

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:39, archived)

Fiona

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:42, archived)

There is some great apple chat here...
www.radiolab.org/2008/nov/17/

How to choose (or totally fuck up choosing) an apple.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:44, archived)

this is exactly how i imagine what frisbee adam's life is like
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zxgxa1GJlnI
( Lightguy hail satan, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:45, archived)

He was in the
paper the other day (he's the furry one)
( spesh., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:48, archived)

I see it as being more like
this.
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:49, archived)

I think you'll find his life is more like
this.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:55, archived)

If his competency on here is any indication of his ability its
this
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:59, archived)

Clickin' all these

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:29, archived)

None of them, they're all bad apples
I do like good eggs though.
( executiverocker only wears C&A, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:46, archived)

I seem to be the only one here who doesn't like apples.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:46, archived)

You prick.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:56, archived)

Piss off you apple harlot.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:01, archived)

what do you eat after you realise you can't remember the last time you ate something that wasn't coated in cheese dust?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:24, archived)

Golden Delicious.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:52, archived)

Is that a reference to the Golden Bum of Ding?

( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:54, archived)

you really should have got over Ding by now
(take that to mean what you will)
( spesh., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:56, archived)

I tried asking this a while ago
cunt don't know their apples
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 23:06, archived)

To comply with minimum posting regulations this post has been automatically generated as there have been no new posts for five years
there is no question - there is no question - there is no question there is no question - there is no question - there is no question - there is no question - there is no question - there is no question
/END
CAUTION! RECENT ARRIVALS PLEASE NOTE THIS THREAD NOW CONTAINS POTENTIALLY HARMFUL LEVELS OF APPLE DRONEBOREYAWNING,
PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE AN IDENTIFIED INTOLERANCE TO APPLE DRONEBOREYAWNING
/END UPDATE
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:32, archived)

NO FATTIES.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:33, archived)

JMG JMG JMG
JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG - JMG
/END
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:34, archived)

J'dawg, I made a really fucking nice dinner, so lush, really simple, quite healthy..... but thing is though, I made enough for lunch tomorow too.
But I didn't portion it right and there isn't enough for a full lunch tomorow and it is really really really nice, do you reckon it's alright for me to have it as like a second dinner tonight instead?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:39, archived)

Knock yourself out, 9 man..

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:40, archived)

Cheers dude.
How you doing? the new iOS5 stuff is pretty rawkin' I dare day myself, gonna install the beta 2 later, they switched on a lot of stuff.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:44, archived)

I might get an iPad later in the year, if they haven't announced a new one.
Technology with JMG.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:45, archived)

technology?
Bullshit. Fanboi bandwagon jumping more like.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:45, archived)

Applefag.
They don't even have a Vimto app you know Jammie.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:49, archived)

i dunno much about i pads but if i compare it to bivvys, normally the bivvy is designed well, but now days there is a gimmick with some issues, they solve them, it is ok for a bit, then the quality goes down hill and they do it all over, hope that helps

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:50, archived)

It would not supprise me to see one at the iPod event in Sept, but it would suprise me to see one before then.
Apparently, and it's all just speculation, that an iPhone4s/5 will be on the cards in august, I reckon this time I might skip a generation and get my contract soo much cheaper, I can't think of any hardware upgrade that would make me want to upgrade. Sure, I'd like them, apparently bigger screen, better camera, and battery life... but not much more than that. It already does everything I want it too.

I'd like an iPad 2, but they did a really shit move by flooding the iPad 1 market with cheap stock making the second hand iPads worthless.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:51, archived)

or you could get a decent phone that doesn't fuck you over as a matter of course.

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:52, archived)

What do you mean?
I'm just wondering, because I love my apple products, and I dont' feel fucked over by them. Sure, they're expensive, but they hold their value well. A high end Merc is also expensive, might not go faster than a porche, but they do other things better.

I can honestly say, Mac products have changed my life, in the respect that I work on them and use them for more hours of the day than not... and it makes things easier for me.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:01, archived)

The more they build up their small world of aspirational products
the more it restricts other technologies, and makes the masses pay through the nose for nothing. Keeping up with the ludicrous stuff they do with their iPhones, it's just horrible. Sure you can put your app in our app store, but you must give us 30% of all your take on it, and it must be no more expensive than anywhere else, and you must not give your users any simple way to get the content from somewhere else... ugh cunts.

As far as all the iPad shit though, I heard an interesting soundbite in that there is currently NO market for tablets, only a market for iPads. Whilst some people will look at an Android or WinPho7 phone there is no one looking at other tablets. Not because they're not as good or anything, just because no one *needs* one at all, so you've only got the iFactor to make you want one. Mind control is aces.

they also heavily over promote device specific content. WTF should there be an app for anything? Again it just creates silos to lock users away. Hopefully HTML5 will address it but until then whilst a flash page would suffice for most apps, they have to pick either android or iphone and then get on with it, and whilst android has a larger market share, the apps still appear on iPhone as that's what's seen to matter.

BUT... iPhones do have a nasty habit of "just working". My Galaxy S is definitely a better bit of kit than an iPhone, but it does kinda need fiddling with to get the most out of it. I'm sure there's a decent paedo joke there, but I'm far too respectable for that.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:05, archived)

tl;dr

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:11, archived)

^ this

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:12, archived)

i've clicked i like it tho because it is a lot of words

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:14, archived)

watch it, this is how the bible started

( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:15, archived)

If you read my reply
you'll see me starting to recite the phone book for a while.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:23, archived)

SORRY - AUTOMATED POST ACCOUNT HAS GONE INTO SLEEP MODE

( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:29, archived)

The 70/30 split is fair enough, it costs money to host the programs and create the archtecture.
Retail shops have like a 50-100% markup. I'm not sure what technologies you think they've restricted without valid technical reason. They make good products, I 'd say that Blackberry is far worst at creating unvalid fan-lust, they create corporate products yet sponsor T4/MTV etc. Getting content is very open for developers, they libaries for XML/RSS feeds are all there. Their limitations in respect to the App Store (not Mac App Store) allows for security and ease.

iPad is fantastic, it _is_ a new market, but a valid one. You can't stand up on the tube, for example, on a laptop. I use mine all the time. There are alternatives, but in pretty much every tech compairson I've seen in the media, the iPad eaither wins or is on top.

They're slow to release what some call standard features, such as copy'n'paste and notifications, but they do them right. Did WinMo7 come with C&P?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:13, archived)

bollocks is it fair enough!
an app provides content from a third party. They paid to develop the app, and very very rightly pay royalties to the content provider, a magazine publisher or whatever. Content cost money, so you're possibly paying them 70% of your revenue in the first place, so apple then just take the rest, and you're left with... NOTHING. absolutely fucking nothing.

And you can't just NOT have an iPhone app... how gay does that make you look? You can't compete without an iPhone app... and you cna't compete with no viable revenue stream.

As for WinPho7 I know very little about it, and while Nokia are slowly fading away (See the N9 runs Meego???!?!?! WTF?!??!) I doubt I'll need to.

It's been fun listening to Buzz Out Loud and seeing how the Apple iCould stuff works out, turning out to just be a tin pot file sync service and nothing couldy in the slightest. Yet compared to Google & Amazon it'll probably still be heralded as not utter shit as no one else will be aware of the alternatives. Oh, sounds familiar!
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:16, archived)

The app store costs a lot of money to run, not saying it isn't profitable, but it still costs to run.
It also handles a lot of things that smaller developers couldn't handle such as credit card stuff securly. They have created a whole new ethos of application revinue; sale them cheap and sale them lots. There are plenty of apps that create huge profits for their companies.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:23, archived)

There are plenty sure
but plenty that just instantly go out of business.

Stuff costs money. I know. 5% sounds fair. 10% maybe.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:26, archived)

They just have to budget it into their buisness plan, in the same way a physical product has an RRP and Wholesale.
Yeah', sure, it's quite a sizable cut, but the amount of reach it gets is soo much greater that it makes it financially worth while.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:32, archived)

pfft
their business plan for every other outlet of their stuff has to be underpinned by apple?? If they could increase the iPhone app price to cover the additional costs then fine, but they can't without making the app / service more expensive *EVERYWHERE* W T F?
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:36, archived)

As far as RIM go
I found out last night that there are like NO podcast apps for my wifes Curve. RIM chose to disable their apparently excellent Podcasts app for non US / Canada users... wtf???? Now that's REALLY bollocks.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:19, archived)

I honestly can't think of a reason for a home user, esspecailly young teens, to have a RIM product.
OK, I admit the PlayBook looks nice, but that's it.

There isn't a single thing they do 'the best', in my opinion. My cousin had a batmizah last year and had a giant blackberry cake.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:25, archived)

wife swears she will get another one when her contract runs out
don't get it. it's horrible!
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:27, archived)

Yeah', about 25% of my friends go from BB to iPhone, but that remaining amount love them, and I can't work out why.
I had one sitting in a draw for the last 3 years and a girl at work broke hers last month so I gave it to her and she was estatic... but to me it felt horrible to use, even for the 15 minutes I spent getting my data off.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:31, archived)

RIM usually do battery life pretty well, but that's because it doesn't really do anything.

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:29, archived)

even the 9900 that's coming out is laughable by low end smart phones.
Reverse in Motion.
( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:32, archived)

Actually yeah', I'd give them that.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:35, archived)

A giant blackberry cake sounds nice.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:29, archived)

baked cheesecake
That's how to do a blackberry proud.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:36, archived)

Copy and paste skill level up.
You now have the ability to edit some of the text on your clipboard.

Your title is now C&P:TL;DR warrior.
( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:26, archived)

The only apple product I care about is cider.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:25, archived)

I never appreciated how nice Magners is
compared to Strongbow. I didn't want to vomit or anything. Really nice.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:27, archived)

try Cornish Rattler

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:30, archived)

send me a sample
i'd be delighted to.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:37, archived)

i have to question the 'It already does everything I want it too.' surely it does everything the inventers wanted it to at the time, eh

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:56, archived)

fuck no
it did everything Steve Jobs told you you wanted it to do at the time. The amount of stuff it *could* do that didn't fit with his vision must be soul crushing for their dev team.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:57, archived)

Did Steve Job's kill your family?
Let it go.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:58, archived)

Baaaaaaaaaaa
You reckon he just happened to get cancer by chance? Oh no.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:59, archived)

The only real difference between Apple and every other computer manufacturer
is that Apple are more gobby about all the shit they didn't include the first time round.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:59, archived)

is this a racism thing? you maybe stretching your hatred for strong black women a bit here

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:10, archived)

to some extent
Still interesting to remember that I think smart phones are still largely prototypes, and these companies are still trying to suss out how to do it, and the technologies required to do it well still don't exist half of the time.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:11, archived)

if someone killed my family i couldn't let it go

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:59, archived)

what if it was someone you really liked?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:03, archived)

i doubt i would like them much if they killed loved ones

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:07, archived)

what if they were one of your loved ones?
Your favourite son bumps of the unwanted middle child, the one with the squint and the runny nose? Sure they were "loved". but you also "love" your wank sock.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:10, archived)

ok, let me put it closer to your emotional remit
What if it was a horrendous bivvy accident?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:11, archived)

are you expecting me to blame my bivvy for an accident? why would i do that

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:17, archived)

to be honest mongy i hadn't really thought it through
i was going to say it wasn't properly fire retardent but that would be the development teams fault. Then i thought about being lolwaki and coming up with some sort of magical walking killer bivvy, but i doubt you'd buy one of those, so let's agree to drop it.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:25, archived)

Steve Jobs from the future did.
That's why Acid Kewpie has come back to the past in a quest for pre-emptive revenge.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:04, archived)

Time Cop?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:05, archived)

It's ten oh seven pm Citizen.
Now be on your way. Curfew starts at ten thirty sharp. If you're on the streets after that we WILL use lethal force.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:07, archived)

Never interrupt me when I'm talking to myself

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:13, archived)

Dry hair is for squids.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:17, archived)

Well, yes and no, I guess if you want to be technical, it was everything the inventors 'could do', within budget restraints and all that.
What I meant is though, with iOS5, there is no functionailty that I want that isn't there.... well, when they open up the SDK for Notification Widgets.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:02, archived)

Notifications? like Android has always had?

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:13, archived)

Yes, they were slow to bring them to the table, but they _are_ done right.
see above.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:13, archived)

It's always had notifications, they were just over-looked and not updated in the 5 years since it's first encarnation.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:14, archived)

The stupid things I an make my phone do with apps like Tasker that iPhones can't even begin to think about...
I was so glad that I didn't bother buying a smart phone 2 years ago and waited a bit longer for android to come along. It's the lesser of the evils, but I'm soooo glad I will never feel resigned to just buying an iPhone ever.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:25, archived)

I really like Android and WinMo7.... and my fave if they fucking well bought out some decent hardware/support for it, is WebOS.
but I just find things easier with apple products, they're all compatible with eachother for starters. Ohhh, I forgot another thing that iPhone needs which it doesn't; custom message-tones.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:28, archived)

WTF ever happened to Jamster?
So nice the lack of stupid ringtones now.

I've not written anything for any phone. iphone apps are meant to be conceptually easier to understand as a single entity whilst android apps are lots of disparate unconnected things under a single icon apparently. Keep thinking about having a go at an android app, but I doubt it'll happen.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:39, archived)

is there a question?
I'm lost.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:35, archived)

yes
/END
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:36, archived)

Ah man, was looking forward to a three hour thread.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:36, archived)

get used to it pops, nothing much to look forward to from now in but hoping they'll choose you a so-so care home
/END
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:37, archived)

You'd have thought the Mod's would have added a question for this sort of disaster.
But who am i to Question them?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:38, archived)

please leave your feedback here, we will take your ideas into consideration
/END
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:38, archived)

hang on
i found that suggestions and bug fixes page thing, and i'm not sure any of that has been instigated. Apart from fixing search and that took about 40 years.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:40, archived)

Fuck off back to QOTW.
/ac
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:41, archived)

Oh god,
Have you read QOTW? How can a group of people be so incapable of having sex? We've been doing it properly as a species forever.
Who votes to have QOTW chemically neutered to save them from themselves? They're not breeding anyway by the looks of the amount of LOLANALOL going on.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:43, archived)

I've said it before Windy, but once I'm in charge, after the Ding-haters, the Ginges and the Witches, The QOTWeakers will be straight into the shower blocks.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:48, archived)

this is harsh, all they have done is misunderstood the question, which is about bedroom disasters, not, as they have collectively decided, about how they threw up over everywhere and everything and everyone at just SOOO the wrong moment, hahahawatamesslol
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:57, archived)

I'm not basing my plan on the results of this week's QOTW.
I'm basing it on the fact that they are vermin who must be eradicated FOR THE GOOD OF THE MASTER-INTERNET!
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:01, archived)

And I'm harsh but fair.
But mostly harsh.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:09, archived)

you are all about the sieg hail

( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:14, archived)

i question this remit

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:41, archived)

at last, a question

( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:46, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=9-dofRbktUc&feature=related
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:48, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ji_C94OXZc
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:52, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwCYBJe0o2M
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:56, archived)

sinatra was a fucking awful singer

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:58, archived)

Fuck you he wasn't
Sinatra was ace. Dean Martin and Bill Crosby were better, but you can fuck right off hating on Sinatra.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:00, archived)

no no no
i'm right. Just like My Way is a seriously fucking awful song. At my funeral? No thanks...

And now... i'm about to snuff it
I was a dick, and people kept telling me so
but i didn't listen to them, and fucked everyone over
cos i'm a toooooossssssss pottttttttt
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:14, archived)

I'm not going to argue you with over this
Because you're wrong. And him being a dick has nothing to do with his singing voice. Dean Martin was a horrible alcoholic, but you don't piss on him.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:22, archived)

YEAH!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=bLmqoGaPvRI
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:59, archived)

This is possibly one of the most hilarious bits of Dean Martin's career
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktL0vsO-8rQ
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:02, archived)

brilliant, if only Parky had conducted all his interviews in song
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:09, archived)

There's another one with the pair of them on Phil Harris' show
almost as good but i can't really be bothered t search for it.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:15, archived)

don't worry, I would link you to a great book on motivation, but you know,

( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:17, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SEfkpGA7vI
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:27, archived)

That's it.
Funny pair those two. Drunk as Lords.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:31, archived)

Is it boozes time yet?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 18:43, archived)

is for me, i'm off up the pub

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 18:43, archived)

down the pub, surely.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 18:56, archived)

not if it's at the top of a hill.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:22, archived)

It does not make good business sense to put your pub at the top of a hill.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:27, archived)

tell that to the folks who run the Tan Hill Inn

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:28, archived)

Not if it involves walking up a hill.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:34, archived)

well think of it this way,
if you go down to the pub, you have to walk up again on your way home. Which way round would you prefer it, walking uphill drunk or sober?
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:40, archived)

This is why when Lemmy out of Motorhead moved to L.A. he chose to live downhill from the Rainbow bar and grill.
True Lemmy out of Motorhead story.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:42, archived)

A pub run by Bungle,
sounds like a great idea.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:11, archived)

I've been there.
It's OK, not great. The bar staff weren't very friendly. Nice windows though.
(MooCow_Byter, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:19, archived)

i'm back now, you can stop all this shit

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:23, archived)

Not after last night

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 18:46, archived)

Depends where you are. For example, if you are in Australia it is 4 in the morning and most Australians won't start drinking for another 4 or 5 hours.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 18:47, archived)

Don't be silly, they won't have stopped yet.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:36, archived)

They've got time for another 5 or 6 Fosters before driving home.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:54, archived)

then picking up several cases at a drive-through off-license

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:51, archived)

Not after Glastonbury.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 18:49, archived)

Did you see byonce?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:11, archived)

apparently at the exact moment she emerged from the pyramid the vigilant citizen server exploded
( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:31, archived)

After Friday's shenanigans?
Yeah, why the fuck not.
( CowJam, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 18:54, archived)

Fucking right it is, the missus has just told me she thinks she's pregnant.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:00, archived)

I'll run the bath, you grab the gin
and send planearm out for a wire coathanger
( CowJam, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:01, archived)

This idea is definitely cheaper than buying a one way ticket to south america and running away.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:04, archived)

he could use a TV aerial instead

( The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:11, archived)

and miss itv3!!!! have you gone mad

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:26, archived)

if he's finished within 60 minutes, he can catch up with ITV3+1

( The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:33, archived)

Well, he better not drink too much Gin.
Mess with his aim.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:34, archived)

Whose the dad then?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:12, archived)

who's

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:14, archived)

Hopefully someone lovely enough to pay child maintenance.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:18, archived)

:(
I've never even MET your mrs.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:38, archived)

Stuj's Stud Farm
offering you the world's most in-demand semen, delivered to your door in a pre-loaded turkey baster within 24 hours GUARANTEED!
( CowJam, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:07, archived)

JC

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:44, archived)

i wonder why he has never had a child like his dad? i hope he is ok

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:26, archived)

I was thinking Johnny Catfish
but I suppose old zombie hippy would do at a push.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:29, archived)

I heard a rumour somebody had him killed?
If it's true i reckon the guilty party will be punished for doing something so horrible.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:33, archived)

Dude, you had sex? Nice one, what was it like?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:02, archived)

Like defeating a level 1000 wizard troll on one of those games after an epic battle.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:28, archived)

Man, I'd create a game-save just before I was about to make the final blow so I can show it to my mum.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:42, archived)

Nah, use the 'save this moment' key like they have after you've killed someone in TF2. Really captures the moment.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:51, archived)

i'm not getting my condoms from you, no offence

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:23, archived)

It's fine, I'll have a read up on Ebays T&Cs and see if I can sell my used ones on there now.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:28, archived)

Congratulations.

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:43, archived)

Also,
have I missed something here? Why is everyone assuming this is a sad occasion? Surely this is a joyous time.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:44, archived)

I'll be happy either way.
She's already done a pregnancy test which came back negative but the doctor today said he still reckons she's preggers. Blood test done, will find out soon.
( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:50, archived)

Best of luck either way then.
And for the poor Cornish kid.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:59, archived)

it's what grrrmachine would have wanted, if he was still with us

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:53, archived)

Fuck sake, I always miss B3tan deaths.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:55, archived)

aww man, sadtimes

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:56, archived)

He killed himself just to get a bit of attention on here.
/joke that's getting a bit old now.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:59, archived)

Filthy breeders

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:04, archived)

How is babby formed?

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:25, archived)

Tempting
Which single malt should I crack open when the sprogs are asleep?
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:02, archived)

Sarson's

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:06, archived)

what have you got?

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:14, archived)

Bells. White Horse. Black and Whites. Co-op. Napoleon. Gordon's.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:45, archived)

i think he's got a boy and a girl, and should fuck off back to mumsnet

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:28, archived)

Laphroig, Dalwinnie, Arbelour.

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:32, archived)

Laphroaig

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:53, archived)

The Singleton

( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:30, archived)

not got any right now
Dufftown thingy, right? nice bottle, nice booze.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:33, archived)

All of them,
and mix them together in a big bucket.
(MooCow_Byter, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:21, archived)

with a wafer thin mint?

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:34, archived)

Isle of Somescotchcunt

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:46, archived)

I find this answer most amusing.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:08, archived)

Racist.

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 21:12, archived)

Half ten for me after work
The missus brought me some cider from Normandy that I'm hoping won't be too disappointing.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:11, archived)

I wish it was, but I'm at work, so no.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:37, archived)

Piss off down the pub for a bit
Then see if you can get all the dots in the small circle when you get back.
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:39, archived)

I've got a busy night ahead Gnomey.
:(
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:41, archived)

Massacre over Oxfordshire!
How's that for a death metal title?
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:02, archived)

Pretty spiffing.
:D
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:02, archived)

Mr. Booze
www.youtube.com/watch?v=wv4N5g2GYMA

takes a while to get going, but worth it.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 27 Jun 2011, 20:32, archived)

my brother is older and getting married this year
he talks a lot but is a very nice guy

my little sister has just finished law school
she is more judgmental but still very nice.

i am in the middle i do not talk a lot and i worry about judging people.
( sleepybinky, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:08, archived)

also, you don't know how to reply to a thread?

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:09, archived)

Teehee.

( rosie posie tingly bongly, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:10, archived)

Wigham

( vladimir, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 17:03, archived)

relax, you're two tents (too tense)

( Lightguy hail satan, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 18:25, archived)

then maybe you should stop judging people

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:12, archived)

but she's a high court judge

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:24, archived)

that makes it even worse that she thinks she can drink drive and get away with it

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:26, archived)

Hahah.
This made me officelol.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:27, archived)

awww i dun made a giggle

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 17:50, archived)

or maybe she should start.
People who judge people get a lot of stick these days, I think it's quite unfair.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 17:35, archived)

But she looks fucking LOVELY in her home made Judge Dredd costume Gobbo.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:39, archived)

I'm not sure what I can add to this threaD.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:16, archived)

a misplaced capital D

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:17, archived)

Stick a pic of your tattoos up
That usually seems to work.
( Lord Gnome, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 17:49, archived)

Like hell you worry about judging people -_-'

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:25, archived)

you don't count as a person

( manolith hooray for me, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:31, archived)

He's more a people.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:33, archived)

*sad whines* :(

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:38, archived)

I've never seen a whining bacterium before.

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:40, archived)

meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep :(
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:48, archived)

Woah there, Binky genuinely cares about judging people.
Lets have less bullying of Binky.
( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:32, archived)

I just checked,
I'm still an only child
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:34, archived)

i'm home from work now, i didn't buy a kindle as tesco looked too busy

( mongychops, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:51, archived)

you sound a lot like me
I bet you don't look like me.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:53, archived)