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Top invention

After years of lurking I've come out with this link. I enjoyed it and hope you do too. https://fbcdn-video-a.akamaihd.net/cfs-ak-ash4/79712/82/1758355592627_31237.mp4?oh=ff90d5379bec9b2f59ec9a59f1537807&oe=4EBDA400&__gda__=1321051136_31b9b5ff12ff2673cf91e4481f71b019

(twister, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:50, archived)

To the bunker!

I only have Ritz Crackers but I have about 8 boxes of them.

*Puts crackers in a bag and heads down the stairs*

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:51, archived)

I've got some awesome cheese for those crackers.

Excellent plan, Ms Pot.

(

J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:12, archived)

Ooh I have gorgonzola

Wensleydale and Red Leicester for meltage.

We can have a cheeeeeese party.

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:14, archived)

You have all the cheese skillzorz.

*is in awe*

(

J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:16, archived)

I am at a disadvantage living here (in Cape Town)

and not having access to British cheese so when it appears on the shelves, I tend to go a bit mad.

I also have vintage cheddar. Nice and strong with crunchy bits.

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:21, archived)

surely if you were lurking properly, you'd have figured out how the site works?

(

mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:52, archived)

this^

it baffles me how long time lurkers frequently make such simple fuck ups

(

real i'm not happy 'til you're not happy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:21, archived)

Not downloading your shit.

(

Mu Dinofiddler, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:52, archived)

bet it's all stinky and covered in wees

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:53, archived)

(

Frogbeat, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:53, archived)

hahaha

(

mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:53, archived)

hakuna matata

(benito vaselini no not that one, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:56, archived)

(

Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:01, archived)

Fan-fucking-tastic.

(

J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:14, archived)

he doesn't look pleased with that massive member

ungrateful little shit

(

Spunky McPunk not dead yet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:07, archived)

run man! run!

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:53, archived)

Am trying to link from an iPhone whilst in bed. It's just a video of some bloke that's made a motorised dog amusement toy. Sorry for any offense caused in the local cliques.

(twister, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:56, archived)

Don't you dare flounce!

You haven't had the proper training or rehearsals. But try posting links on the /links board and people don't get upset.

(

TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:04, archived)

^ This. The more established the b3tan, the more monumental the flounce

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:16, archived)

so, are you suggesting that for each post we make we increase our flounce level?

do you think it resets after the flounce, or does it continue to increase

(

real i'm not happy 'til you're not happy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:26, archived)

maybe we should get redeemable flounce points

which means that someone whose been here a while could make a truly biblical flounce by using up all their flounce points at once

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:28, archived)

<<Issues

flounce clubcards to all B3tans.

(

TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:32, archived)

i'm all over this one

(

real i'm not happy 'til you're not happy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:36, archived)

i like it!

so you could kick off, tell everyone they're dick mittens, threaten to burn down the cunt shed and come back the next day producing flounce points and everything would be forgiven?

(

real i'm not happy 'til you're not happy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:36, archived)

I think I tried this once

but in my defence, I had visited /talk, so no-one was too tough on me.

(

TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:44, archived)

did you flounce on /talk and they weren't tough on you,

or had you been on /talk and flounced here on an unrelated subject?

(

real i'm not happy 'til you're not happy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:54, archived)

I flounced from /talk

and most of them weren't interested. One pursued me for quite a while after though.

(

TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:58, archived)

oh?

persued in a romantic way?

(

real i'm not happy 'til you're not happy, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 0:06, archived)

No, in a 4chan way

Posted my details online etc. Thankfully he got most of them wrong. Never did work out what his problem was.

Edit: and this isn't a dig at /talk. I actually worked with a regular /talker for 5 years; one of the few B3tans I have met in person.

(

TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 0:11, archived)

sounds romantic to me!

tbh, people are weird, online people can be moreso.
/talk doesn't bother me, i quite often go over there when /board slows down (i don't often post), but between me and you, it can be quite funny.

(

real i'm not happy 'til you're not happy, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 0:21, archived)

I've found the individuals ok.

the collective an arse.

(

TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 0:24, archived)

that's a fair assesment

(

real i'm not happy 'til you're not happy, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 1:07, archived)

I AM DEEPLY OFFENDED

(

Spunky McPunk not dead yet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:04, archived)

I think what most don't understand is that you say you are a lurker

This board is for original work and not "ooh look what I found on the internet". There are many other sites that do that.

I don't think anyone took "offense" (sic).

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:05, archived)

i took a fence

and i don't know what the fuck i'm going to to with this fence now?

(

real i'm not happy 'til you're not happy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:27, archived)

How do you know if someone has an iPhone?

They tell you.

(

Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:06, archived)

What did The iPhone user say to the other iPhone user?

Nothing, because neither of them could get a good enough signal.

(Mackeson_drinker, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 6:59, archived)

No no no, fuck the shit link not working.

You've been here for 6 years and haven't paid the blindest bit off attention to how the board works. We don't want your shit links here. You're a cunt.

(

Mu Dinofiddler, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:14, archived)

you're not impressed

you're clearly in the clique

(

mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:22, archived)

Bit harsh....

Accurate, but harsh.

(

tim1701 I have no board signature!!!!!, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:29, archived)

(

Spunky McPunk not dead yet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:03, archived)

I heard that www.crazyshit.com , the well-known humorous video site, employ convicted paedophiles to do their internet marketing.

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:06, archived)

It really wasn't worth the hassle....

Apart from the fact that this isn't the links board, that video sucked balls....

Or chewed them....

Or repeatedly shot them....

Now if it was launching a dildo that the dog was excitedly fetching, THAT would justify the thread!

(

tim1701 I have no board signature!!!!!, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:28, archived)

*sigh*

(

..wil, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:58, archived)

Top lurkage that man!

(

Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 0:00, archived)

HA! totall link fail!!

(Fly Projector, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 2:13, archived)

It's only about two years late for the 'making rude words in public' compo.

(

The Togaboy The world will end on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:58, archived)

Ooh

Background info required on this one.

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:59, archived)

this

(

mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:04, archived)

that

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:06, archived)

^ what these bitches said ^

(

mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:15, archived)

Ooooooo..... get you..

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:19, archived)

There we go, that's better...

(

tim1701 I have no board signature!!!!!, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:21, archived)

Ha-ha!

(

Captain Howdy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:29, archived)

Merciless photoshopping...

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:31, archived)

spang!

(

real i'm not happy 'til you're not happy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:52, archived)

I don't even know where I was going with this...

(scruffygit has an enormous clock -, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 0:02, archived)

(

Clueless Egg Cunt ...of course i'm beach ready!, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 1:05, archived)

awaits MNNNG

(

RedHouse over yonder, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 3:39, archived)

*rummages for pink handbag*

Damn, who has it?

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:30, archived)

well, there's a screen, and what looks like some organ pipes

and a guy in a pink shirt, and some red lighting

will that do?

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:25, archived)

oh for fuck's sake

;)

(

mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:27, archived)

also, I particularly like how roadie no.2 has an interchangeable beard/ponytail

either that or he has two holes for a waterfall of hair to fall out of

I've been at work since 4.30am

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:29, archived)

Beardypone

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:32, archived)

Good heavens

When are you likely to go home and what on earth are you doing?

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:32, archived)

this is the trouble

I work at home :(

I think I might have soup

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:35, archived)

"have" as in give birth to?

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:41, archived)

oh god I hope it's not lumpy

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:53, archived)

just think of it as reducing your hourly rate

that gave me motivation to cut down how much work i did from home

(

mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:53, archived)

or a fuzzy brown towel over his left shoulder

(did you sass that hoopy frood?)

(

RedHouse over yonder, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 3:45, archived)

I'm guessing it originally said "mingle"

The lying down letter looks like it could be an L

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:28, archived)

I'm going for IMAGINE

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:29, archived)

That's probably more likely, yes

I'm not very good at spotting anagrams

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:31, archived)

Ah, it's Sydney Town Hall.

It said 'imagine' in a rather tacky way. There... may have still been people in the room when this happened.

(

The Togaboy The world will end on, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 2:11, archived)

Now let's brush a happy little fuck right there.....

(Fly Projector, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:08, archived)

I fucking love this...

and I love artz.

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:28, archived)

THIS BE ARTZ

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:35, archived)

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:10, archived)

hahahahaa

excellent work

(

mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:27, archived)

Hahahahaha

(

Frogbeat, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:51, archived)

But it's still open!

Edit your post and compo it. Compo it HARD.

(

mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:13, archived)

Yeah, I know what you mean, just look at that guy's beard.

What a prick.

(

Mu Dinofiddler, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:50, archived)

Flouncy Castle

edit dedicated to a certain member of the Olympic Flouncing Team

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:36, archived)

Neva 4get

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:38, archived)

whats all this about?

Have i missed something?

(

taters Bah weep grahnah weep ninibong, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:42, archived)

I was assuming el Satan, but I may be mistaken ...

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:44, archived)

no I just thought flouncy sounded like bouncy

no side story oter than another B3TAN has "is in the Olympic flouncing team" on their strapline.

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:45, archived)

Did I miss a good flounce?

(

Wildyles is back to rimming chimps, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:45, archived)

no - see above :)

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:46, archived)

Oh damn

I've just logged on and saw your pic and got all excited.

I love watching a good flounce.

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:49, archived)

sorry

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:52, archived)

YOUR NOT MY REAL DAD! *flounces*

(

Wildyles is back to rimming chimps, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:54, archived)

YOU'RE NOR MINE!

double flounces

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:56, archived)

I am so annoyed with you for getting me excited at the though of a flounce further down the board

and for that...

*pout*
*flounce*

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:58, archived)

"excited at the THOUGH of a flounce"?

*flounces*

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:11, archived)

No I am not!

The lady bumps give it away.

(

Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:00, archived)

How about this one?

(

Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:50, archived)

hehe top flouncer

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:54, archived)

we asked Carlos how he says 'flounce'

and he said MNUNSS

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:27, archived)

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:51, archived)

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:52, archived)

Delightful spangage

(

TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 23:38, archived)

Flouncy Castle!

(

Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:11, archived)

\o/

(

TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:45, archived)

www.surveymonkey.com/s/G5K7BTK

(ahahahahahahahaha, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:09, archived)

I had a couple of requests while I was away....

So here are Ken Dodd (born 8th Nov) for 'Drunken Miss Hopeless' and Lou the big gayer Ferrigno (born today) for 'addickted'.

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:16, archived)

nice man, green man

no cardboard box, though

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:17, archived)

Would this one be ok?

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:22, archived)

yes. yes it would.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:24, archived)

i'm now clean and bored.

i'm going to watch telly.
g'night all!

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:02, archived)

'Night!

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:03, archived)

You left your curtains open again...

My, you are clean and I love those slippers.

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:29, archived)

Ken Dodd is like a role model for me

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:23, archived)

That's a bit worrying...

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:32, archived)

Like a role model, but not actually one

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:33, archived)

(

Elvis impersonator, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:38, archived)

Haha

DANCE!

(

cowcat Bituminous squeegee, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:12, archived)

(asciifaceofbob bob bob bob bob bob bob bob, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:01, archived)

And, predictably...

(

mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:14, archived)

Hey! Lou's from my home town. Thanks for the post. He speaks quite well considering the neighborhood.

(

BorisKarloff is in the back of the classroom forever, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:13, archived)

(

atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:18, archived)

Get the London FUCK

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:22, archived)

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:35, archived)

And there was me hoping you'd 'do' Hedy Lamarr?!

Woo to Lou!

(

addickted has attained freedom, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:51, archived)

there is no pleasing some people!

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:59, archived)

this is my planet. i have made it. i shall answer any questions you have about my lovely planet.

QUESTION TIME IS NOW OVER! SHOWER TIME HAS COME!

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:26, archived)

How come the gravitational field produces an irregular ring around it?

(

taters Bah weep grahnah weep ninibong, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:27, archived)

the ring didn't start out irregular

but nasa sent a shuttle right through the ring last week and it hasn't got itself back in shape yet

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:29, archived)

the bastards

Were NASA impressed with your planet's 100% luminosity?

(

taters Bah weep grahnah weep ninibong, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:30, archived)

no, the cunts

they said the luminosity interfered with their navigational equipment

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:32, archived)

fucking hell

i'd best keep the planet to yourself then. Dont get falling over yourself trying to impress those NASA cunts.

(

taters Bah weep grahnah weep ninibong, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:33, archived)

they're all barred

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:34, archived)

UR ALL B&

(

taters Bah weep grahnah weep ninibong, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:03, archived)

YEAH! TAKE THAT, NASA!

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:07, archived)

lets hope it doesn't end up like this

(

Elvis impersonator, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:55, archived)

we intend to have the whole planet de-wormed next week

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:57, archived)

It's a circle of poo

floating in the stratosphere it's all down to Global Warming or something science-like

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:44, archived)

it's not poo :(

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:44, archived)

That's what they want you to think

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:45, archived)

it's tomato soup

a costly reminder of The Great Soup Wars. many loyal Spoonians lost their lives in this tragic conflict.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:46, archived)

Was the Soup Dragon involved from the Clanger's home world?

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:49, archived)

he was a conscientious objector

fucking fence-sitting dragons

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:50, archived)

does your planet have breasts ?

I like breasts

(Fat Ballbag, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:28, archived)

it has breasts

in the sense that females living on it are generally betitted.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:29, archived)

this is good

where can I buy a ticket to your lovely jubblie planet

(Fat Ballbag, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:31, archived)

you can't

if i decide you deserve to go there, i put your name on the list and you wait to be contacted.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:33, archived)

I beg you to reconsider

With your planet full of breasts and my Fat Ballbag we could have lots of fun
Well I would

(Fat Ballbag, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:41, archived)

you may be on the list

you'll just have to wait and see

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:42, archived)

Can it be milked?

(

Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:30, archived)

yes

but the milk is toxic and slightly gritty

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:31, archived)

hmmmm sounds like my

man muck

(Fat Ballbag, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:32, archived)

does your man muck have the ability to eat through titanium rivets?

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:35, archived)

To be honest I have not tried

(Fat Ballbag, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:39, archived)

you should

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:41, archived)

I have tried now,I am all sweaty

But all I get is a little tarnishing of the rivet heads.
This means my spooge is safe for space craft and the trip to your planet

(Fat Ballbag, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:17, archived)

*checks list*

well, i'm not promising anything, but there may be a seat left in steerage

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:18, archived)

Why does it have dandruff?

(Ravenous Bugblatter Beast This content may not be working. Please try again., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:35, archived)

it's not dandruff

i blasted millions of tons of sherbet into space, to cheer up astronauts

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:37, archived)

*Raises hand*

(

Jahled Three shades of black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:35, archived)

Politeness on b3ta?

What is the world coming to?

(Ravenous Bugblatter Beast This content may not be working. Please try again., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:36, archived)

you there, the lad with his hand down his kecks

what's your question?

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:38, archived)

Umm, does your planet grow datura? This is of the upmost importance

www.b3ta.com/board/3759265

(

Jahled Three shades of black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:39, archived)

there is a thriving datura industry

on 2 continents

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:41, archived)

This is fantastic news

I shall invest heavily in your planet as I think datura is the answer to society's problems

(

Jahled Three shades of black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:48, archived)

indeed

and it gives us many pirates

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:54, archived)

Oh great ruler of this planet....

What is it's name?

(Lip Up Fatty Fatty Reggae still loves BBQ food on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:38, archived)

spoon

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:42, archived)

So....

Are you the ruler? God? Goddess of the planet Spoon?

but most imporantly....what is the planets anthem?

(Lip Up Fatty Fatty Reggae still loves BBQ food on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:43, archived)

i am both ruler and goddess

and the anthem is i can't decide by the scissor sisters. it replaced winger's battle stations.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:47, archived)

What is it made of?

(

Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:42, archived)

rocks, water, datura and magic

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:43, archived)

That's a nice flower. does it have a Sainsbury's?

I'm only visiting if it has a Sainsbury's

(

Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:45, archived)

it has a sainsbury's

but no kfc

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:48, archived)

thereby limiting the plebian population

Hook me up a datura drip, I'm there!

(

Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:50, archived)

What is the gravitational pull relative to our own earth's, expressed as a direct ratio?

Please.

(

Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:43, archived)

hey, i'm just the ruler/goddess, not a bloody scientist

i pay people to work that shit out for me

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:45, archived)

What are Spoon's natural resources?

(

Mr. Oleary MAKE MONEY FAST $$$, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:48, archived)

big-titted women, sherbet booze and luminous plants

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:51, archived)

I think this is the tune...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMervViId6w

...wandering around through spoon's jungle continent, past the luminous plants, drinking booze, looking at the big titted women. oh yeah.

(

Mr. Oleary MAKE MONEY FAST $$$, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:32, archived)

can't get youtube

but if you're going drunkenly through the jungle, you should be listening to the lion sleeps tonight by tight fit.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:34, archived)

What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:48, archived)

an african swallow?

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:52, archived)

I have a question.....

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:49, archived)

what is it?

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:52, archived)

WHERE ARE THE BLOODY FISH!!!!!!!!!!!

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:18, archived)

fish are sooooo last week

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:19, archived)

Does Keanu Reeves recognise that this is Planet Spoon?

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:51, archived)

he has denied the existence of Spoon

since we changed the anthem from a song that was on the bill and ted's bogus journey soundtrack

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:53, archived)

What about Planet Spork?

(

Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:54, archived)

who do you think started the soup wars?

WE WILL NEVER ACCEPT CHUNKY VEGETABLE!

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:56, archived)

That's what Planet Fish Knife said

And look at them now. LOOK AT THEM NOW.

(

Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:58, archived)

i look at them regularly

they won't piss me off again, the cunts

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:59, archived)

Oh, OK

Also, I need something to draw. Anything of artistic interest on your planet?

(

Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:00, archived)

there are always the water mice

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:21, archived)

what do they look like?

(

Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:23, archived)

they're hard to spot

but they have glistening green wings like a dragonfly and their sparkly mauve fur is waterproofed. they have snorkel-noses, which make them resemble the star-nosed mole somewhat. their tails are longer than those of normal mice and have flattened ends which are pierced. unfortunately, this has led to them being hunted almost to extinction and used as air fresheners.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:26, archived)

I'll see if I can find one...

(

Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:29, archived)

Does your planet love to jump rope?

Also, I was going to 'shop a similar planet with a "No Vacancy" sign. But I don't know how to do it, and will therefore miss the weekly compo.

Nice stars.

(

cowcat Bituminous squeegee, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:54, archived)

jumping rope is a popular pastime among Spoon's more athletic men

and the stars are nice, aren't they?

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:58, archived)

How many questions about your planet do you think it will take,

Before you get bored of ansering questions about your planet?

I shall try to guess what your reply is while I am at the shop, and see if my guess was right when I get back....

(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:02, archived)

i don't know

but i'm off to get a shower at about 8.45

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:03, archived)

You'll never get to go to the academy and learn the force and stuff with an attitude like that ;-0

(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:06, archived)

but i'll be nice and clean

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:10, archived)

Mmmmmm clean, clean you say? what know you of clean? for nine hundred years I'v been clean...

(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:28, archived)

i bet it takes ages to clean between those green wrinkles

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:29, archived)

I only need to know one thing: where the dirt is...

Is yours gonna be a standup fight, Miss, or another bughunt?

(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:37, archived)

i don't know

but a xenomorph may be involved.
now i go shower.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:38, archived)

Rub'a'dub..................

(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:39, archived)

Where is Planet Spoon?

It doesn't appear on any known astro-navigational charts

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:02, archived)

that's the point

it's hiding behind the crab nebula

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:04, archived)

how do you account for an irregular ring ?

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:14, archived)

NASA stretched it

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:15, archived)

ooof !!

(

The Twisted Omentum vidi vici veni, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:44, archived)

Are there any significant harvestable resources on your planet?

I was thinking precious metals, naqua'da, mattresses called Zem, that sort of thing.

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:15, archived)

that sounds a very invade-y kind of question

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:16, archived)

Not at all, we wish only to live in peace and harmony with the inhabitants of Planet Spoon

and we promise not to enslave them and make them work in mattress processing facilities. Absolutely. We don't do that sort of thing.

Incidentally, got a hypothetical question. How big a spaceship do you think would be needed to lift your planet's gold reserves? Just asking, no reason.

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:22, archived)

i have banned all gold from entering Spoon's atmosphere

as i'm allergic to it.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:27, archived)

Ah, you're a cyber(wo)man

One of the original ones, not this parallel-universe nonsense.

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:29, archived)

why do people keep calling me that?

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:31, archived)

Spoonrise

(scruffygit has an enormous clock -, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:16, archived)

oh, now i like this

*clicks*

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:20, archived)

sci-fi films

mandatory viewing or optional?

(

Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:20, archived)

sci-fi films are optional, but highly recommended

horror films are mandatory on saturdays and hallowe'en.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:22, archived)

sign me up to the next shuttle!

err am I going to like the shuttle ticket price?

(

Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:23, archived)

i'm sure we can come to an arrangement....

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:28, archived)

your anus!

(

prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:21, archived)

we've been through this

when i saisd NASA stretched the ring, i wasn't talking about my personal ring

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:23, archived)

Never Aggravate Stretched Arses

(

prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:27, archived)

pfff

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:33, archived)

Bad day to be a spoonanaut...

(scruffygit has an enormous clock -, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:26, archived)

NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

*smites the fuck out of you*

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:30, archived)

Do the residents get bothered that the land and sea clash?

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:29, archived)

not at all

they have as much sense of taste as i do

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:32, archived)

Do you have to go to school on your planet?

(

BorisKarloff is in the back of the classroom forever, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:38, archived)

yes

stupidity is frowned upon

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:55, archived)

FUCK!!!!!

(

BorisKarloff is in the back of the classroom forever, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:58, archived)

does your planet have landing facilities for bread based interplanetary craft?

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:04, archived)

yes

NO MORE QUESTIONS! I GO NOW!

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:13, archived)

that's handy :D

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 21:15, archived)

bugger

I was just about to ask when a cat is

(

Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:24, archived)

Badum tisch kaplop!

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:38, archived)

and he looks like old gregg's younger brother

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:39, archived)

oh, and *spang*

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:41, archived)

would you like a baileys?

(

Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:44, archived)

smooth and creamy baileys

yes i would

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:47, archived)

would you like a generic sainsburys "ostensible cream sherry"

at least it's not tudor rose :D

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:49, archived)

that sounds acceptable

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:50, archived)

Top tip: If you think you're going to be sick, drink some baileys. It makes your sick taste nice.

(

Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:50, archived)

Top Top

Tudor Rose tastes like a mix between Lager/Sherry Optimism/Piss

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:53, archived)

Top Tip

fill your shoes with rice krispies. you'll feel like you're walking on a tropical sandy beach without ever leaving your home.

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:55, archived)

I actually use rice crispies as carpet, thus giving me this feeling continually in the safety of my own home

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:57, archived)

Wise beyond your years, both of you!

More top tips here: www.viz.co.uk/toptips.html

(

Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:58, archived)

ah, i used to love the viz

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:59, archived)

Top Tip

Visit a tropical sandy beach, it's nice.

(Pie of Meat ___°¬¯O¯____\o/_____/\_,____Y¯¯Y, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:58, archived)

don't really like beaches

but i've woken up on a few

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:59, archived)

but they are always filled with heavily armed robbers

who at best are going to leave footprints with little arm-ruts in the wake and at worst kill you in the face and steal your pants

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:59, archived)

what beaches have you been going to?

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:00, archived)

tropical beaches with hugely armed robbers

and no other kind

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:04, archived)

Lloret beach isn't nice

very gritty sand and overpriced refreshments

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:05, archived)

Sand is a cunt OR Sands are cunts.

(

Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:01, archived)

it's hot and it makes your feet feel nasty

but it does smooth rough heels

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:02, archived)

lol, mostly this is true;

the exception being if you run out of baileys and hook into beer and bourbon after.......

(

Zank Frappa Who let the lefties in?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:24, archived)

I'd say he has the figure for it, but not the face...

Top spanging maiden!

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:43, archived)

BRA!

Edit: Also, is half of b3ta on strike or something? Wait...are we scabs?

(

Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:45, archived)

no we are young scabs so we are scabies

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:50, archived)

oh dear, god.

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:51, archived)

Hahaha, shame on you!

(

Lord Kronos Go Team Pachyderm, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:52, archived)

I have no shame

which is a shame

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:53, archived)

i got rid of my shame years ago

there really was no use for it

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:54, archived)

(

h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:55, archived)

Where are all the frying pans

when you need one?

(

edjogs Collared doves are shit., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:57, archived)

haha

also: b3ta.com/links/Europes_First_Transexual_MP_takes_her_seat

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:20, archived)

hahaha

(

Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:29, archived)

Can you put me in touch ;-)

(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:04, archived)

Well, it really doesn't match my eyes :(

(

mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 22:18, archived)

Sloppy and most likely bindun...

(Beh3moth The devil's advocaat., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:05, archived)

HAHHA PDF FILES IF YOU SAY IT IT SOUNDS LIKE PDF FILES WHICH IS AHAHAH AHAHAH

AHAHHA PDF FILES

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:43, archived)

AHAHAHA!

AHAHAHAHA!

(

Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:46, archived)

AHAHAH AHHAAahahahAHAHAAHAHAha

AHAHA

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:47, archived)

^Ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha
^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha ^ha_ha......

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:22, archived)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA DAMN THOSE PORTABLE FILE FORMATS HANGING'S TOO GOOD FOR THEM

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:46, archived)

HAHAHA AHAHAHA hahaha I MISPRONOUNCE AS POTTABLE HAHAH AHAAHAHHA FEEL FORMANTS

HAHAHAhahahah
ah

hAHAHA

HHAhaahhaah HAHAhahahahahahaAHAHAAHAH!

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:48, archived)

Ahahahaha it's funny because it sounds like stuff!!!! hahahahaaahahaha!

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:50, archived)

HAHHA AHAHAHA ahaha SOMETHING SOUNDING LIKE SOMETHING ELSE THAT ISN'T THE SOMETHING THAT IT IS

AHAHAHA ahah aHa HAHAHAHaHaHAhA

*cries*

HAHAHAHA AHAHAHA HAHA AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:51, archived)

this discourse

needs more clicks!

lol +1/ilike! rolf penismail!

(

Zank Frappa Who let the lefties in?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:19, archived)

HIS ASS

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:56, archived)

HIS ASS!

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:58, archived)

Party time at the Met

(

Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:45, archived)

daisy chain?

(likeajackhammer, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:55, archived)

Prepare for exploding truncheons

baton rounds sparying everywhere

(

Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:56, archived)

This makes me think of the conga (not the Black Lace one - the other one)

which makes me think of the Spurs lyrics to the conga.
Which makes me think of Chas n Dave singing Spurs are on their way to Wembley.

There's my earworm for the rest of the day. I hope you're proud of yourself!

(

Joliet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:57, archived)

I got lost at "- the other one"

So yes, I'm very proud of myself!

(

Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:59, archived)

*shakes fist in your general direction*

(

Joliet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:01, archived)

Antidote for you

www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVaEPx_VyXs

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:02, archived)

I blame Chas & Dave for how I learned to remember the correct potting order of snooker balls

(

Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:41, archived)

second time today i've had snooker loopy in my head :(

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:50, archived)

I shouldn't laugh* because it's horrible when you get a tune stuck in your head

*but I am

(

Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:02, archived)

i blame bargain hunt famous finds

today's celebs were willie thorne and dennis taylor

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:05, archived)

The Thin Blue Line - WOO!

~~Blue~~ Bumming

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:58, archived)

(

atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:29, archived)

That balloon is doing an impression of the mirror in the Ringu video...

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:45, archived)

the parties go on so regularly they've had to put up signs...

(

Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:39, archived)

perfect

(

Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:08, archived)

gives new meaning to getting pulled by the fuzz

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:54, archived)

When the foeman bares his steel,
Tarantara, Tarantara!
We uncomfortable feel,
Tarantara!
and we find the wisest thing,
Tarantara, Tarantara!
is to slap our chests and sing, Tarantara!
Tarantara!
For when threatened with emeutes,
Tarantara, Tarantara!
And your heart is in your boots,
Tarantara!
There is nothng brings it 'round
like the trumpet's martial sound,
like the trumpet's martial sound.
Tarantara, Tarantara, Tarantara, Tarantara, Tarantara, Tarantara, Tarantara, Tarantara, Tarantara, Tarantara,Tarantara, Tarantara, Tarantara, ra, ra, Tarantara!

(

Whiffert Support the Free Balogna Movement!, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:31, archived)

i prefer to kick them in the bollocks and run, myself

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:32, archived)

They're at it again!

www.b3ta.com/board/10591168
www.b3ta.com/board/10576276
www.b3ta.com/board/10577351

(

Ian Woosnam, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:28, archived)

Hahahaha!

Best dogsmile eva.

(

edjogs Collared doves are shit., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:31, archived)

^ agreed

(GforGermany looks like some sort of retaining plunger, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:38, archived)

hahaha

what a bastard!

(

alpaca muffalo bozzerella, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:34, archived)

Bwahahahahaha......

...breathes...hahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

*Click*
:D

(

Ninj, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:34, archived)

Hahahahahahahahaha

(

mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:35, archived)

hahaha

great expression on the dog

(

Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:50, archived)

That dog is entering a world of pain!

(

Joliet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:57, archived)

hehehehe

weenderful

(

Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:05, archived)

Haha!

Best one yet.

(

Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:45, archived)

Hahaha, when will this senseless war end?

(

Lord Kronos Go Team Pachyderm, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:50, archived)

when the hurly burly's done

(

unclepills Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think., Thu 10 Nov 2011, 2:24, archived)

(

Elvis impersonator, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:11, archived)

Can someone sort me an Autoclick..

...for everytime this bloody fella posts please?!!

:)

(

Ninj, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:15, archived)

You are Australian

AICMFP.

(

Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:19, archived)

That's a horrible accusation

(

emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:23, archived)

^ this

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:29, archived)

Woo!

This is fab

(

mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:17, archived)

haha

Yes!

(

Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:23, archived)

Smashing. *clicks*

(

edjogs Collared doves are shit., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:27, archived)

Ha ha ha!

Ace!

(

Smallbrainfield, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:45, archived)

Yoink!

Marvellous!

(

Joliet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:58, archived)

bloody ace

(

taters Bah weep grahnah weep ninibong, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:22, archived)

*naked lunch flashbacks*

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:52, archived)

I need a poster of this for my office! :)

(Beh3moth The devil's advocaat., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:07, archived)

(

Captain Howdy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:42, archived)

hahahahahaa

(

h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:57, archived)

COMPO IT!

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 19:18, archived)

bad lad from X Factor signs new deal..

Click for bigger (181 kb)

(CjR Mix, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:59, archived)

Hahahahahahahaha!

Brilliant CJ *Click*

:D

(

Ninj, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:04, archived)

I don't get it

also, adblock, you fucking plum

(

emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:09, archived)

that'll get complaints

perhaps you should cover up the huge bell end

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:09, archived)

man on man

......................gay

(

atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:12, archived)

you can't tell where one hair starts and the other hair ends

(

crazyjude is very happy with happytoast and his skill, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:15, archived)

*switches off webcam*

Also OP: Don't be such a ballbag.

(

Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:35, archived)

I think that's why people are getting upset.

This little wanker's face was made to be on the end of a cock.

(

Bourbon Fox Bourbon is a moron, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:35, archived)

COCKFUZZ

(

crazyjude is very happy with happytoast and his skill, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:58, archived)

He's the wrong way around

if he had a cock in his mouth the useless knob-end couldn't keep making noises with it

(

..wil, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:49, archived)

About a million years too late, but...

I knew I'd seen Cave Johnson somewhere before. Angus stole his image, the greedy fuck.

(

the_other_jeff_lebowski Croutons on my tits, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:51, archived)

I now need to play this all the way through again immediately

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:59, archived)

Same.

God dammit...

(Haz, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:41, archived)

very good spot

Cave Johnson - a tragic life. A sad legacy.

(

revmoola was thinking about a software problem, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:13, archived)

This just in from Jackson trial...

(

Ninj, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:38, archived)

John Malkovich was there?

(

addickted has attained freedom, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:46, archived)

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:47, archived)

Anything with Guy Goma in gets an instaclick!

(

thecrapgatsby isn't listening LALALALALALA, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:53, archived)

for my boss

(

shiro_kuma, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:15, archived)

brilliant :D

clicks

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:17, archived)

^ what she said

(

barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:21, archived)

I like this

(

emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:21, archived)

JUMP IN URINE

LIKE A BOSS

I like this

(

mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:24, archived)

Wot no unimpressed crab?

www.b3ta.com/board/10543794

(But it's fab anyway)

(

thecrapgatsby isn't listening LALALALALALA, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:34, archived)

haha, found out

i wonder what i can do with this next week

(

shiro_kuma, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:44, archived)

Yes!

my virtually every

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:39, archived)

almost always

(

crazyjude is very happy with happytoast and his skill, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:11, archived)

yay

(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:30, archived)

Unperturbed Space cat remains unperturbed

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:38, archived)

MOAR OF THIS SORT OF TOSH!

(likeajackhammer, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:39, archived)

have a totally related pea

(likeajackhammer, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:41, archived)

yes...the relationship is clear to me

LOL :D

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:43, archived)

(likeajackhammer, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:43, archived)

yeah, totally! :D

(

Mr. Oleary MAKE MONEY FAST $$$, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:52, archived)

Awwww!

(

Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:20, archived)

is it Catnipp teim?

(Fly Projector, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 16:44, archived)

I gotta bad feline about this...

(

barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:42, archived)

well, why not

(

shiro_kuma, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:43, archived)

Meanwhile Space chimp is faring less well...

(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:53, archived)

he's definitely perturbed

him

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:55, archived)

pew pew

(

crazyjude is very happy with happytoast and his skill, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:56, archived)

Corncob attack!

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:41, archived)

Ha-ha!

(

Captain Howdy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:14, archived)

This is an Orang Utan

(not a Chimp)

(

Rafi took last proton-pump inhibitor on, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 11:28, archived)

This is exactly the sort of thing that "Save for web" is for :)

I like everything about this, from the unpeturbedness of Space cat to the ceaseless determination of Space giraffe. And I want a Hovis loafrocket.

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:06, archived)

well xmas is coming

who knows what will be in your stocking :D

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:09, archived)

Ooooh fingers crossed!

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:36, archived)

There's some top unperturbulence

going on there!

(

edjogs Collared doves are shit., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:07, archived)

Yes...

(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:31, archived)

(

JollyJack - a stench from the past, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:21, archived)

A letterbox, a litter bin and a drinks machine...

WHATEVER NEXT!?!?!?!LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

(

emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:23, archived)

I hope it has tits

(likeajackhammer, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:32, archived)

Me too.

There's only so many squirrels with tits you can look at before you start needing something... more.

Vending machines with tits are definately the way forward.

(

Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:55, archived)

(

emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:19, archived)

And balance is restored.

(

Bourbon Fox Bourbon is a moron, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:25, archived)

Now THAT's a quality webcomic

(

Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:28, archived)

Sequential Roboobs...

...Hello there indeed!

(

Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:47, archived)

Never drink anything blue,

that's a rule I live by.

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:25, archived)

That's a good rule.

(

JollyJack - a stench from the past, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:38, archived)

+10 AP

1 2

(

barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:40, archived)

I'm tickled pink

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:10, archived)

The music in Fallout 3 was brilliant :D

(

Bourbon Fox Bourbon is a moron, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:25, archived)

If you mean the actual score as opposed to what you hear on the in-game radio:

I concur....and own it.

(

JollyJack - a stench from the past, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:36, archived)

The ambient soundscapes? Definitely.

Especially this one.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=eLh7e2IjD9g&feature=related

(

Bourbon Fox Bourbon is a moron, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:44, archived)

Enclave Radio now keeps saying "we stand now, at the precipice" over and over :(

Oh well, it wasn't worth listening to anyway

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:42, archived)

I like how the Enclave was what was left of the US Army/Government

Without any rules, they were free to be as oppressive and ruthless as possible.
SYMBOLISM!

(

Bourbon Fox Bourbon is a moron, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:46, archived)

'lo JJ :)

I'd like to see a wasp, a moth and a dragonfly re-enacting the Death Star Destruction scene along a creased duvet please :D

/old skool

(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:25, archived)

Haven't I already drawn that one?

(

JollyJack - a stench from the past, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:27, archived)

did you do the Glaswegian ostrich trying to make an omelette?

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:30, archived)

I tried.

But it got glassed while trying to buy eggs.

(

JollyJack - a stench from the past, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:36, archived)

Quite possibly!

I rediscovered the Wolf picture you did me the other day - that's going on the wall when I've decorated :)

(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:31, archived)

typical man

woo!

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:39, archived)

draw a picture of a balding old man with glasses drinking a glass of wine in a life jacket

(likeajackhammer, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:39, archived)

Dammit

have I left my webcam on again?

(

NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:49, archived)

I can't be the only one curious as to who came out on top in the letterbox standoff?

Those letterboxes are tough cookies.

...or is this a deleted scene awaiting the blu-ray release?

(

barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:40, archived)

I wouldn't bother with the Blu-Ray.

They've added loads of stupid shit in, like CGI postmen walking past, etc.

(

Bourbon Fox Bourbon is a moron, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:41, archived)

(

atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:10, archived)

WOO!

(

Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:14, archived)

Yay, this makes me smile

*clicks*

(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:24, archived)

hooray for cats in space

i shall go and post my new one now

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:35, archived)

Cor

(

mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:24, archived)

*sigh* I'm so jealous of that cat.

I'm watching it with this in the background too...

(

Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:51, archived)

(

atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:57, archived)

Excellent.

(

Captain Howdy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:15, archived)

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..............................

(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 20:32, archived)

Can I post this here? Just came into my head, sorry.

(robneymcplum spiced up his life on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:10, archived)

Giggady...

(

addickted has attained freedom, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:24, archived)

perfectly acceptable

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:36, archived)

Jimmy Spudface has been eating girders again

(

Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:03, archived)

It's a bit too 4chan for b3ta, but I like it

(

mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:25, archived)

バーカ

(

Death is the Eternal I have not my ally, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:37, archived)

FOREVER ALOOF

(

Bourbon Fox Bourbon is a moron, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 15:26, archived)

4chanは商用作品の無断転載があるから嫌い。出て行け。

There are upload many commercial works "without original author permission" in 4chan. So I hate it.
GET AWAY.

(

Death is the Eternal I have not my ally, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:21, archived)

I've never been on 4chan

I did try once but couldn't even get to the board so gave up.

(robneymcplum spiced up his life on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:39, archived)

It's alright at times.

There's just way too much sludge to wade through. A bit like comments on youtube, just without a video of a cat doing something stupid.

(Haz, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 19:45, archived)

Mr Greedy

(

Smallbrainfield, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:08, archived)

He slimed me...

Hugely good!

(

barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:08, archived)

I can emagine him saying....

"Fuck off, I'm Full!"

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:10, archived)

I can imagine someone shopping this very soon

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:12, archived)

.............

................. waits

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:59, archived)

it's not happening is it

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 17:32, archived)

Woo!

This is better than good.

(

mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:11, archived)

WOO!

that am splendid.

(

Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:12, archived)

dark and scary

well done!

(

Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:13, archived)

He's eating guts pie

GUTS

GUTSGUTSGUTSGUTSGUTSGUTSGUTSGUTSGUTSGUTSGUTSGUTS

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:17, archived)

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:34, archived)

YUM!

(

discomeats This canoe, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:36, archived)

WHAT YOU TALKING BOUT....

(

Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:00, archived)

SHAFT

(

Victor Meldrew, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:38, archived)

This would make

an ideal image to promote World Diabetes Day. Woo!

(

splorp ®, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:23, archived)

They would make a fine range of t-shirts

although I'd stay clear of WWW.SHOTDEADINTHEHEAD.COM , the well-known humorous garment manufacturers, as I heard that they employ convicted paedophiles to do their internet marketing

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:13, archived)

ACE!!

(men boles Benea, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:31, archived)

I assume the scantily-clad Little Misses are just out of shot

(User #86772, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:35, archived)

oh god

*spluffs*

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:42, archived)

I withhold my click until I know whether that's jelly or blancmange

(

thecrapgatsby isn't listening LALALALALALA, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:49, archived)

Jelly.

Blancmange is opaque.

(

barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:50, archived)

*squints at pic*

Oh yes, I'm going blind apparently. Well hoorah! Jelly is all of teh win! (Blancmange is Satan's breast implants).

*click*

(

thecrapgatsby isn't listening LALALALALALA, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:03, archived)

I am loving these sir...

(

tokyosexwhale Straight From my Mind Penis..., Wed 9 Nov 2011, 13:51, archived)

WOO as per sir!!

*Click*

(

Ninj, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:13, archived)

excellent stuff

have you done Mr Strong yet?

(

Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:19, archived)

Mag Jabba The Hut FTW!!!

Awesome as always SBF.

(

addickted has attained freedom, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:24, archived)

I see he's gone for the set meal, there

(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:27, archived)

would have prefered to see a pasty

nevertheless most woosome

(

cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 14:40, archived)

Brilliant addition to an excellent set.

(

Captain Howdy, Wed 9 Nov 2011, 18:33, archived)

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