Wonderful, but NSFW picture.
twitpic.com/5f5u2p

What blah, blah, etc.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:43, archived)

nsfw no good

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:43, archived)

It's the Queen sitting beside a man with his willy out.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:44, archived)

prince philip is soooo un-PC.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:46, archived)

high phive!

( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:47, archived)

The old scamp.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:47, archived)

that crazy duke of edinburgh!!

( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:46, archived)

LOL.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:47, archived)

bacon sandwiches, crisps, tea, coffee, scotch eggs, trifle, gravy
( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:48, archived)

although it might be sauce :(
( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:49, archived)

Prince Albert?

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:48, archived)

Why is the Queen showing people his willy?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:49, archived)

There's an officers mess joke there somewhere

( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:50, archived)

Why is he wearing a severed badgers head as a sporran?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:52, archived)

WHAT ARE YOU HAVING FOR LUNCH?

( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:35, archived)

I'm going to hire a sandwich
and claim it off binky's insurance.
(MooCow_Byter, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:36, archived)

Dunno
I've got folk coming at tea time for a might feed so maybe just a butty, possibly fish fingers. I just don't fucking know!
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:38, archived)

Also, seeing as I am now a patron of the arts
I've commissioned a four piece dinner service that will have the Comedy Spunking Cock © on the plates. I'm classy.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:44, archived)

Patron of the arts?
What the FUCK?
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:45, archived)

I NO LOL
My mate wot makes pots and that is doing it for me
She has made me these:
Coffee Pot
Tea pot
And I have one of these coming next week
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:52, archived)

I love these.
But you are a massive fucking fairy for having more than one tea pot.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:57, archived)

The pink one was for The Missus's birthday
But that skull one rules. She has an Etsy thing, and a facecock thing too. Frankly some her the stuff she transforms are shit, but these pots are selling like mad. She's having to take time off work to keep up. Incidentally, the glamour girl ones were my idea. Not gay at all.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:00, archived)

*cough*WEDDING PRESENTS*cough*

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:01, archived)

Which one?

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:04, archived)

all of them

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:08, archived)

I'm not sure.
I'm tempted by the pink pinup teapot, just so I can mock Badger every time he makes me a brew...
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:10, archived)

I'll facecock message you the link to her stuff too

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:16, archived)

I'll bet you were too full of fail to suggest the ladies dresses were made out of heat-reactive paint though.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:18, archived)

I did ask for that
But she can't get hold of a cost effective lacquer. Or something
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:25, archived)

I really really want that.
WANT IT.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:01, archived)

poofter

( moohalaa, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:13, archived)

Thing is right, I look gayer than you with a sailor hanging out of your arse right now
But I like tits and fannies and that. So I win.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:16, archived)

Tuna and sweetcorn sandwich
tea, a mandarin yoghurt and saucy daydreams.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:40, archived)

Barbecue and ketchup
respectively.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:41, archived)

don't turn this into a thread about sauces, don't you remember what happened last time
( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:47, archived)

*wipes away a tear*
The Great Sauce Thread Of About Two Months Ago. We hardly knew ye.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:50, archived)

Let's get Kersal back and spark up that argument about whether tomato sauce is gravy.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:56, archived)

What the shuddering what what what what WHAT?

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:57, archived)

Oh my word.
b3ta.com/talk/4316707
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:58, archived)

That couldn't be wronger if it were written by Nick Griffin.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:00, archived)

If he'd written it there'd only be that white gravy you get from KFC.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:01, archived)

Griffin never struck me as a man who'd be picky about what he eats.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:04, archived)

THAT'S NOT GRAVY.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:09, archived)

So you're saying it's Ketchup?
You racist.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:11, archived)

i dunno, to be honest. they all look the same to me.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:12, archived)

That's pretty special.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:00, archived)

^this?
Is this like MGT's 'if you think a rude thought about me it's rape?'
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:58, archived)

Even if one were to accept that premise, she'd still be a virgin.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:00, archived)

It's in the same 'you fucking idiot what are you talking about shut up' vein, yes.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:00, archived)

oh man, i loved that one.
STOP RAPING ME WITH YOUR MIND.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:09, archived)

It's the same as real rape

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:15, archived)

A circle in a spiral, a wheel within a wheel
Never ending or beginning on an ever spinning reel
As the images unwind
Like the circles that you find
In the rapists of your mind
( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:16, archived)

like a knife within a rucksack or a roofie in a gin,
when you find yourself in toilets with a blade under your chin
when you wake to find no memory and the photos in your bin
and the rapist that you get
puts you on the internet..
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:22, archived)

Ha!

( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:23, archived)

This is your best work however.
b3ta.com/talk/7071558
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:57, archived)

i should be on morphine all the time.
i'm BRILLIANT on it.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 14:09, archived)

GRUEL
I'm currently eating a banana
( VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:42, archived)

In order to atone for my below-average performance this morning I am having
Chipotle beef wrap from sainsburys
Ibuprofen
Co-codamol
and two cans of Monster
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:51, archived)

Salad, cous cous, chicken and low fat coleslaw.
It's quite tasty.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:52, archived)

I'm having a buffet.
I must admit, there's great catering here at the mass funeral of binky's road terror victims.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:52, archived)

Chicken and brown rice, when I can be arsed to go and make it.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:55, archived)

beef, mustard, chedder, pickle and salad sandwich

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:00, archived)

Oh man I've got a squeezy bottle of Branston pickle that I've not opened yet.
I need some fucking cheese.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:02, archived)

do it,
my sandwichs are that awesome they are the talk of the lunchbreak, yuo can tell i work somewhere really boring
(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:04, archived)

also sunflower seeds

(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:11, archived)

Alright sunshine?

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:13, archived)

im not too bad thank you
yourself?

ive already finished my lunch due to it being awesomely tasty
(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:15, archived)

I've finished a component of my lunch
I have one component to make and the other to eat.

I'm alright thanks. Are you coming to Xmas bash?
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:18, archived)

xmas bash? i havent thought that far ahead yet
ill say yes. so expect me
(TheFallGuy doesn't it?!, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:20, archived)

YES.

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:24, archived)

The question is Vladimir,
WHAT ARE YOU HAVING FOR LUNCH?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:06, archived)

coffee
( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:08, archived)

it's cold too

( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:12, archived)

go and chat to one of your colleagues and slyly swap your cold coffee
for their fresh hot coffee. if you don't like the colleague, wee in it first.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:17, archived)

I have no colleagues
( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:20, archived)

well, wee in your own coffee then
do i have to think of everything?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:21, archived)

can you order me some colleagues, they sound handy, here in the old people's home they are all a bit dull
( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:23, archived)

You're in an old people's home?
why are you on the internet and not racing wheelchairs around the corridors with your frie...ohhhhhhhhhh. Sorry.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:28, archived)

Hula-hoops and a can of diet coke

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:07, archived)

a mexican chicken shaker thing from motherfucking ASDA.
it sounds grim but it was lovely. although, being from asda, there was a faint aftertaste of fag smoke and despair.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:14, archived)

So what's up?
You got AIDS or summat?
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:16, archived)

dunno yet. consultant haematologist appointment next wednesday.
on the bright side, it's either arthritis or leukemia. i hope it's leukemia. i've always wanted to swim with dolphins.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:35, archived)

the dolphins are all booked up at the moment, I can get you in with some halibut next wednesday, is that any good to you?
( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:39, archived)

A cigarette and a bottle of lucozade.
And it's really my breakfast.
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:16, archived)

a pink wafer biscuit dipped in your mother's cunt

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:20, archived)

I'd like to see you try, she had gender re-assignment surgery in 2003
( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:22, archived)

poached egg on toast
wholemeal bread, very runny yolk
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 13:28, archived)

Insurance
I binged my car with another car yesterday and having never binged it before/combined with an utterly bored and unfriendly insurance phone assistant, i am now scared i didn't put across my statement fully. Do ALL insurers send you a form or can i ring back and clarify? i was all flustered and she totally asked leading questions.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:46, archived)

it wouldn't actually be changing my story just making sure they got all the points, is that ok to do?

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:47, archived)

My anus is rejecting me for some reason
Why do you hate me bumhole, what I have I ever done to you?
( magnum, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:50, archived)

stop trying to put yourself in your bumhole.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:51, archived)

i think he is asking it out
he should try playing hard to get
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:56, archived)

don't know lol

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:51, archived)

dude you old people are supposed to know all this shit.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:52, archived)

I've never driven a car in my life
Or had any kind of insurance policy.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:54, archived)

Just don't admit liability to anything
Always blame the other person even if it was your fault
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:53, archived)

littlebitofpolitics

( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:58, archived)

Go round her house and force her to admit liability at knife point.
I don't charge for advice.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:05, archived)

admit liability undress
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:06, archived)

at hammer point
much classier.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:38, archived)

I advise not doing what the guy in China Zuowan posted something about did, i.e. stab the other party to death because you are concerned they will sue you, but it's OK it seems you didn't do this, well done
www.b3ta.com/talk/7222482
( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:09, archived)

are you all right little Binky Boo?
Even small crashes are upsetting. Here, have a hug and a lick.
*hugs*
*licks*
( jenpots, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:10, archived)

thanks jenpottles. yeah, my first incident, sad times, car in garage, i was all shook up, uhhuhhuh.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:11, archived)

*strokes hair*
It's ok. Most of us will have a bump at some point. Chalk it up to experience.
( jenpots, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:13, archived)

Of course respectable people only get their bump within the sanctity of wedlock.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:17, archived)

oh.... I'm very unrespectable then.

( jenpots, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:21, archived)

Is a wedlock, like a headlock, except more permanent?

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:22, archived)

It's some kind of frightful contraption involving steam and pistons.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:24, archived)

eam and-up
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:30, archived)

s +Broke
( Lord Gnome, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:03, archived)

Steely Dan

( magnum, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:09, archived)

sneezy rider

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:13, archived)

it's a headlock on a wednesday

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:52, archived)

yeah but i fear that the other woman was also at fault and she's not accepting any blame or giving me her insurance details and i think it's harsh on me
simply because i have no experience of bumps, clearly she does, am i going to come off extra bad for being naive?
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:26, archived)

Did you take her license plate number?

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:27, archived)

yeah and she had mine
and i just spoke to her and she says that since she's opened the rear door (which yesterday she said it was probably a bad idea to do) then her car isn't watertight so she's getting a hire car and wants it on my insurance and i just dont knowwwww
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:28, archived)

my car was never watertight, who said watertight is necessary anyway? :(
also i think she's being pushy because she had a shiny car and she was going to the public school for spports day :(
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:29, archived)

She sounds like a right bitch.
It seems that you killing her in a booze fuelled road rage incident was the correct thing to do.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:40, archived)

If she won't give you her insurance details
tell your insurance company that and inform the police.

Don't discuss anything to do with the accident with her. It's your insurance companies' job. If you even vaguely imply that you might think it was your fault they'll take that as an admission of total fault.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:02, archived)

i gave her numberplate and the first line of her address to my insurance company
and they said that is enough but she demanded my policy number and i gave it to her.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:08, archived)

that's fine, you have no worries there
but she has a legal responsibility to provide you or your insurance company with the details of her insurance. If she doesn't, she's technically breaking the law.

She can't claim off your insurance just on her say-so, don't worry.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:15, archived)

as well as the numberplate?
because my insurance company said afterwards that it was my choice to give her the policy details.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:47, archived)

I think she has to provide you with her insurance companies name, at least
as Shambles says, the policy number is meaningless. In any case, do not speak to this woman again. Give as much detail to your insurance company as possible and leave it to them. And don't admit any liability.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:05, archived)

She is an idiot.
That number is worthless and meaningless to anybody outside the insurance companies.
Do not spek to her again. Give your insurer your version ot events. Don't admit liability. Let them decide who is liable for what.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:21, archived)

If the accident is your fault then she's entitled to claim for all reasonable expenses to put her in a position as if the accident hadn't happened
including repairs, hire car etc.

But she is obliged to give you her insurance details. Contact the police saying she's refused and see what happens.

Stop dealing with her directly.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:15, archived)

aw man, you just got that thing OUT of the dang garage!

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:54, archived)

gutted.
and my insurance renewal is up soon. im having NO luck with the car-related finances recently.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:11, archived)

:(
glad you weren't injured, though
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:14, archived)

I read that as "Have a huge dick"

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:27, archived)

I read that as "Have a huge click"

( vladimir, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:24, archived)

Banaw waow bananwaoh banananana ner ner ner

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:23, archived)

too much coffee this morning?
or have your hands swollen to a size making it impossible to type?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:24, archived)

Dr P is closer
I am in fact doing the opening riff to Eat The Rich by Aerosmith as I appear to have it as an earworm :s
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:33, archived)

I had "Dude Looks Like a Lady" playing in my brainz this morning,
Aerosmith must be paying a lot for this.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:44, archived)

It's clearly only affecting the cool kids.
Alright UToL? How was Cuba?
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:53, archived)

Not bad, accidentally fondled a dolphin,
a 22 year old female one though so I think that makes it OK.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:33, archived)

did you get her number?

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:35, archived)

dude, how many brains do you have?
and how come you get to pluralise them with a Z? do they wear shades and talk 'street'?
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:53, archived)

Shit, Blue Star is turning into an electric guitar.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:28, archived)

Bah-weep-Graaaaagnah wheep ni ni bong

( The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:38, archived)

NEEEEEEERD

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:54, archived)

See
I'm reading that as the opening guitar riff to How Soon Is Now by The Smiths.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:06, archived)

did you swallow a radio?

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:08, archived)

I'm glad someone got it :)

( The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:34, archived)

i talk tv

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:43, archived)

My advice is you probably don't want to go to court over it, even if it means assuming liability and paying the excess.
if you pull out of driveway, especially a driveway on a blind corner, it's basically the same as entering a new road at T-junction. you have to give way to existing traffic and wait for a safe time to enter. If the person was speeding, or you were already on the road and driving when she came around the corner, you could make a case that she was driving unsafely. your case would be helped if there were any signs warning of your driveway that she didn't heed. But unless you have these factors, and are able to prove it, I'd just cop it. Im assuming it's a driveway, but if you're talking about an entering road the law is the same
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:55, archived)

i'm not going to argue with what the insurance companies decide, i'm just trying to give them all the information and provide photos.
she, on the other hand, seems to think it's all totally my fault and be arranging hire cars and everything, when it's my car that isn't driveable and hers was practically fine.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:02, archived)

not strictly true
you must drive a road at a speed suitable for dealing with hazards. How fast Binky pulled out doesn't matter. If when Binky started to move she couldn't see the other car, then the other car is by definition going too fast for the road if it then hits Binky's car.

You're dead right about it being your responsibility to make sure that the road is clear, but all you can possibly do is look. If the bend is that bad that a driver pulling onto the road can't see, the resposibility lies with the driver already on the road to slow down.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:07, archived)

anyway, hill start round the corner for me, it was about 3-5mph maximum, just to get over the top.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:09, archived)

Think of it this way
if she'd come round the corner and hit a person standing in the road it would be her fault. What's the big difference? So, some blame must lie with her as she is driving too fast for the visibility. You'll have to take some of the blame I'm afraid, because since the police weren't called no-one can actually be sure entirely who was to blame. Even then, these days there are never skid marks so speed is harder to assess.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:13, archived)

You're right, but as I said, it depends on how far out on the road she was when the other driver hit her
An existing hazard doesn't include someone suddenly pulling out in front of you. however binky did say 'scraped my panels', which suggests she was already pulled out and on the road when the other driver hit her. In this case, you are right, the other driver should be driving at speed where she can safely avoid (brake) even stationary hazards
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:16, archived)

yeah, it's a difficult one
as how far out she was needs to be balanced against the visibility for the junction

Oh, a cunning idea. Binky, is there a sign on the road where the woman was driving warning of the junction you pulled out of? as in, you know, the usual triangle with the black road junction on it? if so, it's a very strong argument to say that she should have known there was a junction just around the corner and should have slowed down.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:20, archived)

nope, country lanes
but she lives faiiiirly local, so she should bloody know that you can't go along them faster than 20, or 30 on an exceptionally visible bit.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:43, archived)

scraped her panels, on the corner of my car.
she didn't stop in time or pull over into the hedge away from me.

i dunno i can see it all being called my fault.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:51, archived)

It seems pretty straightforward from what you've said.
If she was going too fast to go around you, around a blind corner, then she was driving too fast for the road and it's her fault. As tmb has said, there could have been a tractor round the corner and then she would have been fucked.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:57, archived)

she wasn't going round a blind corner, she was going past blind entrances.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:58, archived)

Then it's still her fault, she shouldn't have been so far over to the left.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:12, archived)

to the right.
but it's a single lane, it isn't exactly wide.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 12:42, archived)

and i will accept that i pulled out without having a clear view, because you actually need to pull out to see
so yeah i did drive into her a bit, but she wasn't exactly slow and oh god i don't know.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:58, archived)

Usually they do, as they need a written statement and you get to draw a sketch of the junction and positions of your cars
I had to do it when an old man turned right across a junction when I was going straight on through a green light (because "he made that turn every day without someone else being there before"). He admitted liability to the insurers but his daughter (who wasn't there) wouldn't let him settle the claim without receiving some money himself (claiming suddenly that I was speeding and wanted an 80/20 split)

EDIT: It's also worth taking some photos of the site, especially from your point of view as a driver so that the insurers can see that you had limited visibility.
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:14, archived)

i have photos, my insurance people took my statement over the phone and they do not want a form or anything.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 11:47, archived)

Crap, I hate wishing I hadn't just done something
You'd think that when I manage to fix my android phone after assuming it was bricked and would cost me hundreds to buy a replacement that I'd stop fiddling??? Oh no. Dick.

Morning all. Who had bix for breakfast?
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:35, archived)

I have a windows phone and it works

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:36, archived)

I can't think of anything better right now than
the toast with dairylea spread I'm having.

I recently returned a faulty brand new android after 31 days to be told I would get a refurbished one. Bastards
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:39, archived)

I had Dairylea triangles for the first time in fucking ages last week
They've changed the packaging so you pull a tab and the whole thing opens up presenting a perfectly intact triangle of 'cheese'. One of the few practical problem solving opportunities left to modern kids and the cunts have dumbed it down.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:46, archived)

dairylea on spaghetti with back pepper
Droooooooooooooooooooooooool
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 10:01, archived)

i didn't have any breakfast
now i am hungry. i shall be even hungrier by lunchtime, i reckon.
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:40, archived)

I had some breakfast and now I am hungry
You just can't tell what will happen in this crazy world.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:41, archived)

I had late for work and can't remember anything sleeping pills and probably going to be signed off work bix
whinge
( moohalaa, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:42, archived)

*late for work fives*

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:47, archived)

oh boy, it's a 'cr3 replies to everyone' thread!

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:46, archived)

Bix for breakfast?
What next, marmalade for lunch?
( magnum, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:46, archived)

Oh sorry. I thought this was a reply.
You know, because it says Post a new message.

Carry on.
( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 5:28, archived)

oh shit, what's this?
this isn't the "fucking toss it in the fucktruck, you bellend" button
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 6:29, archived)

Whats this?
no fucking free cider? that is the last time I ever click on the `click here if you want free cider` button
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 7:19, archived)

[click here for free cider. no really]

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:51, archived)

you're so mean.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:06, archived)

hmm, the link is broken
not enough htmls, probably
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:15, archived)

Try internetting it to your ROM.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:19, archived)

Have you backtraced it?

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:22, archived)

i might reverse the polarity

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:25, archived)

An engineer's wife asks him to go the shops.
"Pick up a carton of milk," she says, "and if they have eggs, get six."
A while later he returns with six cartons of milk. When asked why, he says "They had eggs."
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:18, archived)

that's actually pretty good

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:49, archived)

Yeah, it's not bad.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:49, archived)

have you heard about that new book on poltergeists?
it's flying off the shelves
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:51, archived)

Really? Sounds interesting. Who wrote it?

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:52, archived)

The same guy who wrote the book about the Yellow River.
I.P. Freely.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:55, archived)

A ghost writer

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:57, archived)

ghost rider?

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:15, archived)

No time to read that
I'm reading a fantastic book about antigravity. I can't put it down.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:56, archived)

I've been reading e-books for the past week
And I'm afraid I'm never going to come down.
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:07, archived)

i started one about recycling and waste disposal in a modern society.
turns out it was just rubbish.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:07, archived)

I read one about canine genitalia.
It was the dog's bollocks.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:08, archived)

calling something the dog's bollocks originally meant it was obvious, ie. sticks out like a sore thumb or the testicles of a hound.
it is only recently (well, 1980s) that it has come to mean good.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:10, archived)

your joke still works though, doccy P

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:13, archived)

So if dog testicles are made of thumbs how come they didn't evolve into hands?
Looks like your precious science doesn't have ALL the answers.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:13, archived)

into hands, YET.
jeez. give them time.
( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:14, archived)

i heard it was something to do with lego. or is that just a myth?

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:14, archived)

no, that's a female moth.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:14, archived)

According to Jeremy Paxman it's an old printers' term.
Are you calling Paxman a cunt?
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:16, archived)

sure, why not
www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/dog's%20bollocks.html (this one supports what binky said and what you said)
www.phrases.org.uk/bulletin_board/43/messages/1022.html (this one debunks what i said)
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:25, archived)

it's a good myth, though.

( sleepybinky, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:47, archived)

female moths all look the same to me

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:53, archived)

I don't get it.
Do the eggs produce the milk?
( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:08, archived)

Eggy cup.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:10, archived)

as an accredited engineer
I resent this. Even if it is accurate.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 9:18, archived)

I'm not sure I can, this has messed up my whole day now

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:26, archived)

He should set up a phone line for people affected by this incident.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:28, archived)

It's a definite topic for a liveline call in

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:32, archived)

JOE, HE PRESSED THE WRONG BUTTON, JOE.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:34, archived)

MY LIFE@S ALL OVER THE PLACE NOW JOE, I@M IN BITS

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:39, archived)

And now we have Ben Dunne on the line, for some fucking reason.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:41, archived)

"MY BROTHER RYAN DIED"

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:43, archived)

Hahahahahahahahahaha

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:44, archived)

Hahaha

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 8:41, archived)

COME ON THEN
I'M PISSED. WHO WANTS SOME??
i'm not really pissed like that, i'm pissed in a more mellow and thoughtful way, but come out of the woodwork and say hello anyway, even if it won't be quite as much fun.
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:34, archived)

I've been drinking wine all evening
But I'm not angry, sorry
( Theoban What of it, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:43, archived)

i'm not angry either
i thought i said that, in my post. people can't read anymore. sad times.
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:52, archived)

I didn't say you were angry
I said I wasn't angry.
People can't read anymore.
Sad times.
( Theoban What of it, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:54, archived)

at least people can still drink
happy days
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:56, archived)

ecstacy has just been rated 1/8th as dangerous as alcohol

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:56, archived)

in fact, everything is less dangerous than alcohol, according to the bbc

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:57, archived)

british bumfucking corporation

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:57, archived)

I thought it was Big Black Cocks.

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 5:26, archived)

Man I dunno about you, but I'm doing well on the drinking front

( Theoban What of it, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:56, archived)

yeah man i'm all good
got me some gin and a glass and a mouth to put it in
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:58, archived)

I had some beers then I started drinking the wine.
WOOO TUESDAY
( Theoban What of it, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:59, archived)

yay tuesday boozers!
you used to have a FANTASTIC picture of you, pissed, on here and it made me love you instantly and i have loved you ever since and also because you seem really nice as well i also love you cos of that
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 4:01, archived)

ALL the pictures of me are of me being drunk. I don't do other kinds of pictures.

( Theoban What of it, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 4:06, archived)

ur my hero

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 4:08, archived)

I'ma bout to go to bed
not pissed but just had some wine. yes, so what....sue me. drawing crocodiles atm.... don't ask.
( --- ---, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 4:01, archived)

CROCODILES!?!?!?!!?!?
You disgust me. Sexually.
( Theoban What of it, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 4:06, archived)

a girl liked me the other day
possibly
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 4:10, archived)

how much did that cost?

( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 5:29, archived)

Hi.
What's your favorite color?
( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 5:23, archived)

anyone alive alive-o?

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 2:25, archived)

that's funny because the song is about a ghost
 
what did she die of? I'm thinking TB, or possibly the dropsy
( Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 2:55, archived)

ghosts no existe

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 2:58, archived)

it's just a song
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Molly_Malone

I never liked it, really
( Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:03, archived)

just a fever, they say.
 
possibly the boogie fever.
( Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:04, archived)

i've got a fever and the only cure is extreme fever! ha ha! get it?
it's ironic because the cure for my fever is actually more fever
( Lightguy hail satan, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:34, archived)

i prescribe 500mg of fever thrice daily

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:35, archived)

goodnight JMG you big stupid attention seeking fanny
leave the late talk to the real nightcrawlers eh?
i totally have gin. envy me.
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:51, archived)

'Night Nonce!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:52, archived)

is that like night nurse?
but for kids?
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:53, archived)

if your kids can't sleep try Night Nonce

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:54, archived)

That sounds like it would have the opposite effect of what you're intending.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:57, archived)

i thought people often fell asleep after sex

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:58, archived)

I'm trying out google's new speech to text thing.
Oh shit, it worked.
( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:58, archived)

blanket with f***** hello

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:59, archived)

that 1 didn't work

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:01, archived)

What happened to all this "I'm giving up booze" shit you trot out?
Or are you just being a good alcoholic deluding yourself?
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:59, archived)

i don't hardly drink
i'm treating myself. i usually just have a pint down the local, i only have a wee bottle of gin (35cl) so i can't get hammered.
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:01, archived)

Keep telling yourself that.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:28, archived)

shut up you stupid irish twit

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 3:32, archived)

if you were a dog, i would not put you down i would let you suffer as long as possible

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:00, archived)

if you were a person i'd post you to a scat site and have mongy poo into your mouth all day

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:02, archived)

good one

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:03, archived)

yeah i know right i am well good with like, putting people down
cos putting people down makes me cool, y'all
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:04, archived)

Is it Bombay Sapphire?
IS IT?
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:07, archived)

yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:08, archived)

YOU BASTARD.
I hate you...

No

No

You are lying, like TOTALLY..
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:10, archived)

I've got a box of wine, a bottle of vodka and a crate of cheap cider in cans.
But I can't drink any of it. All that's left is some dodgy Serbian 'grappa', some cheap aquavit, and some...oh that's it. Sadface.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:26, archived)

why can't you drink any of it the LOVELY rnuk?

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:31, archived)

grappa?

( FIEND, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:45, archived)

here's a photo of me gettin' buzzed
i.imgur.com/jXEsE.jpg
( Lightguy hail satan, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:56, archived)

haha i love cockateils
used to have one, she was ace
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 1:58, archived)

Night lads and lasses..
It's all downhill from here. All the way to Christmas.
Nights are drawing in. Lap up all the sun you can.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:41, archived)

Stark realism, here

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:43, archived)

It's best to get people on the internet prepared well in advance.
Real life situations thrust upon them can lead to sweating and staying indoors.

I'm a healer.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:43, archived)

This lot should be more grateful
You're a true man of the people
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:45, archived)

I should do foreign visits on behalf of the government.
Teaching the good British ways. Or having big fight with that particular nation's hardest bloke.
Whichever is easiest to kick off.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:46, archived)

I'd like to see you take on The Hulk

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:47, archived)

He can't do any worse than Ang Lee.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:49, archived)

That's the kind of ask that's going to require GMoS in my corner.
It's claimed GMoS doesn't even bring a towel to the ring. He's got that much faith in his fighters.
What a man.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:49, archived)

GmOS wouldn't even need to raise a finger
The opposition would simply fall at his feet in the presence of such pure masculine charm. They'd probably even get a semi.
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:51, archived)

That's the French for you..
Fairies.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:53, archived)

In other news
I just spazzed out when a moth landed on me and hit my hand on the desk on a pre-existing wound. OUCH.
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:43, archived)

Let's not piss about here, none of these people are going to be going out in direct sunlight.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:45, archived)

*Firm handshakes*
It's a good job we have a secret club where we discuss about people behind their backs, you and I..
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:45, archived)

Why has that site been down this week?
Am I banned or something?
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:47, archived)

I think the internet is falling apart, SSG..
Running out of domain names for starters.
:(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:49, archived)

Soon enough we'll be able to change this place to b3ta.jmg.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:51, archived)

I predict tears.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:52, archived)

oh man i am not going to glastonbury
who else is well excited about not going to that infested poohole?
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:31, archived)

Me!
On account of not liking any of the acts, liking civilised things such as hygiene and shelter too much to give them up for the sake of said acts, and not having the money, the North London address or the liberal values for it anyway.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:36, archived)

Yep, this.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:43, archived)

I'm neither excited or disappointed.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:37, archived)

I say this every year
but then I see it on telly and it looks fucking awesome
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:37, archived)

I didn't care
then I have just sent the kids off...and I am well jealous. I could have gone too. I also have to work down here on Thursday to make matters worse and the traffic is going to be TERRIBLE.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:40, archived)

Can't say that I do.
A festival atmosphere is up there with a football crowd and the banter of a kitchen in full flow for sheer fucking craic, for me.
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:40, archived)

Meh
since the opportuinity of meeting John Peel is no more, I'm not fussed. give me a smaller festival over a big one.

Boomtown looks ace
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:46, archived)

i agree

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:51, archived)

I'm off to Croatia in August
for a tiny beach special. I can't WAIT!
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:53, archived)

why would i have even thought about it?

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:47, archived)

I'm off to Glastonbury soon.
Does anyone have any messages for Bono?
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:02, archived)

Yes, I've got his milk, bread, children and toilet paper.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:03, archived)

Bollocks, you don't know Bono.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:04, archived)

That's a daft message to pass on to Bono.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:35, archived)

I like this.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:40, archived)

Russ is ignoring us
now he is all 'Glamping' at Glasto. I don't know why he bothered.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:02, archived)

Glamping?

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:06, archived)

Camping for cunts.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:08, archived)

I was assuming that was a given, I still want to know what word got shortened along with camping befor poating a reaction.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:11, archived)

Glamorous...
*cringe*
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:14, archived)

What?
Do those fuckers not realise camping isn't meant to be glamorous? It's meant to be muddy, smelly and fun, not trying to impose middle-class values on it.

*Seriously fucking annoyed at that now*
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:17, archived)

It's a great example of a clumsmanteau.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:28, archived)

I'm not sure those are middle class values, more values of cunts.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:31, archived)

It makes me puke..
YES I want to buy a tent ready made for 500 English pounds please with a flushing toilet and electricity..and and...Oh GOD I want to go to GLASTONBERRY.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:13, archived)

I want to go too, but I have a servicable tent in the garage for the pleasure.
Way I see it, if there's going to be torrential rainfall, I'd rather be lumped in with the 79,000 who got fucked by the weather rather than those stupid few who paid for the pleasure of trying to maintain an air of "status".
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:19, archived)

"Glasto"

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:20, archived)

You mean "Glahsto".

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:21, archived)

*Twitches*

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:24, archived)

*Passes killing knife over*

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:25, archived)

"Glahsteaow"

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:27, archived)

Im not fucking american....
Only they call it glastonberry
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:27, archived)

Oh, what a load of bollocks.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:30, archived)

No.
I'm not talking to that cunt until he apologises.
( jenpots, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:05, archived)

It's time for you to get over this nonsense.
Just because he didn't know the name of your street, that's no reason to hold a grudge.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:06, archived)

he still hasn't found it either

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:08, archived)

Humph!

( jenpots, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:11, archived)

Dear Bono,
Die in a fire.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:05, archived)

I'm going to bed soon
any messages for oh god I don't know a young jenny agutter or something
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:06, archived)

Yeah, tell her that the Olsen twins if they hadn't turned out all wierd looking are round at my place.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:08, archived)

She should have
got naked in The Railway Children.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:10, archived)

No message, just this bottle of cold piss.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:06, archived)

do you piss irn-bru?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:07, archived)

I don't know what that is.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:08, archived)

I'll go for probably.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:15, archived)

what do you drink in places you can't trust the tap water?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:16, archived)

What has water got to do with drinking?

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:18, archived)

Lemon fanta.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:18, archived)

Booze

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:22, archived)

*lines up crosshairs*
Tell him to duck the fucking horrible cunt that he is. Actually, don't bother. Just tell him I hate his fucking face..just before I get him between the eyes.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:09, archived)

i dont like dogs

( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:09, archived)

I have just sent off mini-me
with his mates...god damn I am now so JEALOUS! I HATE YOU.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:17, archived)

Already?
Christ, it doesn't start til thursday
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:22, archived)

He is stayin at a mates tonight
then getting there for gates opening at 9 tomorrow. GET with it GRANMA! WEDS IS WHERE ITS AT!
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:26, archived)

Ohh the gates open on Wednesdays now?
Back in my day etc.

(Oh no actually I went to Reading on a Wednesday. Nevermind.)
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:39, archived)

They do...
and it gets full pretty quick. I wanna go now...I'm going to be a moaning cunt all weekend...
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:44, archived)

Think of it this way
House to yourself = stereo on full blast with the garden door open listening to full on loud reggae. Set up a tent and get some mates round.
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:48, archived)

I just found out the lodger is away too!
AND I just had my garden done...PARTY ANYONE?
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:52, archived)

"Stop it"

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:19, archived)

He won't listen
HE NEVER DOES..
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:26, archived)

I don't really know why people hate bono so much.
Especially with pricks like Sting running around still.
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:25, archived)

Mmmngngngnnhh???
Sting is a mere irritation compared to the horror that is bongo.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:27, archived)

So what you're saying is you fancied Sting and bono when you were younger, but bono never wrote back to you and sting was his usual cunt self?
Let it go, it was 20 years ago ffs.
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:33, archived)

But I cant!

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:36, archived)

i.imgur.com/OGBDG.jpg
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:47, archived)

I hope that's bongo
when the hedge tries to play more than the usual 3 chords.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:55, archived)

If we, as Irish people, have learnt anything from Christianity, it's that we have room in our hearts to hate as many people as we want.
Oh, and if we have the right collar we can fuck kids and all.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:27, archived)

Dear Bono,
Why songs so rubbish?
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:30, archived)

aye
How's he fancy killing those scum cunts in Kilmarnock on the telly?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:39, archived)

Not really.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:47, archived)

yo niggah

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:48, archived)

*shakes hand*
Hows your body part for ailment.
( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:53, archived)

well tired

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:55, archived)

I know that one.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:57, archived)

tell him i liked him in that south park episode

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 23:51, archived)

bono, your solo work lacks an edge

( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:09, archived)

This
maddox.xmission.com/c.cgi?u=11worst
( WormuIus, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:14, archived)

I fucking hate that cunt

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:16, archived)

I don't.
I mean, it's an american who suffers delusions of not only adequacy, but also of superiority.
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:22, archived)

I did like his point about jobs being 'stolen' from americans by cheap illegal labour.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:29, archived)

Which one.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:24, archived)

bongo
especially. I'm no fan of U2 but bongo really grates my loins.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:30, archived)

Hahaha

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:24, archived)

A simple punch in the face will do

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:21, archived)

I don't advocate or endorse your statement.
But cannot fault its simplistic approach.


Hello Doll-face, got any class new musics I should go listening to?
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:24, archived)

Err
Burial. I'm late on this bandwagon, but LOADS OF BURIAL.

Also - this youtu.be/mg-x8RU7kio
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 0:27, archived)

I just ate a meal cooked by a psychiatric patient.
What's the bravest thing you did today, you fucking coward?
I'm surprised you people ever won a war, I mean, really.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:36, archived)

We won a war?
Wasn't that the Russians?

I picked some raspberries. They're quite prickly and I didn't even wear gloves or owt.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:37, archived)

Oh, you people won lots of wars.
Just not that second one your soccer fans chant about.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:38, archived)

I think Sting said it best
I hope the russians make love to their children too
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:02, archived)

Are raspberry canes prickly?

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:39, archived)

That was sort of the joke.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:40, archived)

It's been a long day.
I shall sit here wearing a hat that has 'Thickums McThicky' written on it in drool.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:45, archived)

are you talking about spackers knobs?

( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:59, archived)

At our nearest PYO strawbs and rasps place they have a little collection box for Help for Heroes
with a note saying if you tried a few while you were picking leave some cash in the box. So there, discussion time.
( magnum, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:39, archived)

My mate is doing the Ride Across America thing where you cycle non-stop coast-to-coast raising money for military service charities.
And all those cunts can do is stuff a few soft fruit in their gobs? It's a fucking liberty. Bring back national service.

/discussion
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:41, archived)

first off you don't have any mates
and no way is it riding non stop coast to coast, unless the cunt is street hawk, which you may as well pretend he is as you are making it all up
( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:45, archived)

http://www.raceacrossamerica.org/
It's a team thing. Four hours on four hours off or summat. It's still pretty fucking hardcore.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:47, archived)

yeah, whatever, at wot point would i open that site? or care about a non stop/stop start wank fest of your pretend mate, nice try hambles

( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:53, archived)

doing shit for charity is a fucking waste of time.
Just give the money, it's not about you sacrificing or sweating, because nothing you do could ever compare to the tragedy of the victims of whatever cause you're raising money for, which means your fucking bean bath or pseudo run just cheapens the whole principle of human suffering and turns it into a joke.

If you care about suffering, dig deep and cough up, but don't turn it into a fucking lark with your mates, you morally impoverished scumbag.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:45, archived)

I can't decide which would be more tragic
you actually thinking that was a coherent argument, or you pretending that it was a coherent argument as a feeble attempt to sound edgy.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:49, archived)

I do want to see an end to charity

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:51, archived)

Well you can't.
So building arguments around it is an exercise in idle sophistry.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:52, archived)

yeah but it does wind up the bleeding hearts who think their grunting and sweating will ever achieve anything ever

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:53, archived)

Yeah. Oxfam and Wateraid and Cancer Fucking Research never did nuffin.
FFs. I'm actually indulging you in this like some sort of prick. I need to get off the internet.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:55, archived)

still got water problems and cancer, haven't we

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:56, archived)

YES!

( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:57, archived)

why? charity enforces power

( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:54, archived)

i agree with you both, in so much as so far as you a both wrong cunts who need to fix up and look sharp

( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:52, archived)

sweet as a nut mate, sweet as

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:57, archived)

where did cowfoot go?

( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:02, archived)

yeah, why did the wrong cow stay and the wrong cow leave?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:04, archived)

Probably the EU and it's farm subsidies.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:06, archived)

I'll let the rogue apostrophe slide
but considering France gets something like 20% of the entire EU budget for its paltry million farmers, I'm really glad they're going to lose nearly a trillion euros when economies of Spain, Greece, Portugal, Italy and your own pestilent island collapse.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:09, archived)

Fucking hell, you must be sick.
Really, go see a doctor. And not me or Shambles.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:11, archived)

not bothered, living in Europe's only growth economy, right here

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:16, archived)

Yeah, I'm very annoyed about our last government forcing AIB to sell off their Polish bank just before the election.
We owned a profitable bank, in a strong economy, and on their way out the door the fucking gangsters sold it at a knockdown price. Cunts.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:18, archived)

Yeah, Bank Zachodni's going great guns, best bank on the market right now
your lot really ballsed that up.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:22, archived)

No, they didn't.
They were gangsters. By their standards they got that right. It was the last bit of looting they could do.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:26, archived)

Fucking hell.
I mean, even I did a gig for former British servicemen/servicebirds.
And I didn't either charge, or claim expenses.
And, while you might not have noticed, I have "issues" with the whole Brit Imperialist Armed Forces fandango.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:47, archived)

Palestinian Yiffer Organisation strawberries are shit.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:43, archived)

you shut your whore mouth

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:25, archived)

I CAN'T HEAR YOU BECAUSE OF ALL THE FUR IN THE WAY OF YOUR FACE

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:40, archived)

Badger did epic trolling on this subject on the TWTD website.
I was amazed at how humourless some people are.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:50, archived)

Have you got a link to that?
I asked him yesterday, but after the board had moved on.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:54, archived)

It's lurking in their archives I think.
www.twtd.co.uk/mb.php?m=v&t=132386#132386

See if you can spot him ;)
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:09, archived)

Most of the responses seem quite civil.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:15, archived)

Fuck forums that require one click per reply.
Fuck them to infinity.
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:27, archived)

Well, you can't expect good technology from the British armed forces.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:32, archived)

Ipswich, you mean.

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:33, archived)

Either/or

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:37, archived)

GiffGaff offered me a fiver of credit or a fiver to give to Help for Heroes
I only pay a tenner a month anyway and the credit wouldn't go towards that so I opted for the charity option so I can feel smug and superior. Also some of my mates are trained killers.
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:26, archived)

I'm not surprised you never did

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:37, archived)

I've been meaning to ask you something.
You clearly know a lot about cars, and have obviously taken a long time to build up that store of information.
When was the last time someone asked you a question, about cars, to which you didn't know the answer, but felt obliged to make up some bollocks to hide your ignorance?
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:40, archived)

I'm not afraid to say "I don't know"
but I do give people bullshit information if they didn't ask me politely, and then they fuck off and buy an Alfa.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:47, archived)

I figured you'd be like that now,
but I also reckon your interest in cars predates such maturity.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:48, archived)

oh yeah
but there was a time where I had to speak to a members club for an article I was writing, and in the pub where they met they all brought along a bit of their car, and the others had to identify what the bit was. It was when one guy put down a washer on the table and another guy said "ahhhh, that's the olive sleeve for the thrust bearing in the gearbox" that I thought "nah, fuck it, whatever happens I'm not going to turn out like that."
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:50, archived)

That's the problem with hobbies, right there.
My father has recently started getting back into model trains.
It's something he's wanted to do since he was a kid, and why not? He's got the time and money now, but he's quite rightly terrified of being associated with model train people.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:53, archived)

Oh no, here come the french and spanish
"FUCK YOU FRENCH AND SPANISH"
"CONFIDE THIS MONSIEUR"
"IN YOUR FACE"

*Ten years later*

"Bonjour Mr Exile, back for more"
"Yes"
"IN YOUR FACE"

*BRITAIN WINS*
( magnum, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:38, archived)

I have done nothing brave today.
I am a chicken shit.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:38, archived)

[something about the blitz]

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:41, archived)

I went to work..

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:41, archived)

And then a hero comes along, with the strength to carry on

( magnum, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:44, archived)

Some of us have scary jobs you know..

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:45, archived)

Flapping your hands about is scary?

( CowJam, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:54, archived)

It can be...
only in that some jobs are really hard and and I can be totally unprepared, and might be shit and not understand what anyone is saying and the Deaf people might not understand me and the other interpreter might think I am rubbish, *sweats* and one job made me cry today because it was so sad.
Only in that way.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:59, archived)

awww
*hugs*

I never realised it could be so hard.
( CowJam, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:00, archived)

that's ok
most of us feel totally inept in this job and often feel a lack of confidence, it usually works out OK. :-D
But yes, there are sad times for other people sometimes..
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:12, archived)

are you saying that deaf people have better language skills than you?

( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:00, archived)

I don't believe I was making that comparison.
and it's Deaf not deaf.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:09, archived)

Why's that then?

( magnum, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:18, archived)

Why's what?

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:25, archived)

Deaf rather than deaf
Seems a bit patronising to give it a capital letter, not sure the blinds or the limping do the same
( magnum, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:27, archived)

Not really, it's just to differentiate
Deaf people see themselves as a cultural group as they have a shared language, history, experience that is unique. They are a political bunch, who have an identity different from 'deaf' people. Those who can't hear but will probably have English as a first language and are deafened or become hard of hearing at a later age.
The same idea doesn't apply to the blinds or the limping as they generally have a shared culture and language with us hearies.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:36, archived)

I think you mean Hearies.
If they get to do it then so do we.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:40, archived)

So what is the definition of
Hearies and hearies?
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:45, archived)

I don't know, I was being facetious.
Now I feel bad about it.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:48, archived)

AaAaARrRrddDDVVvVVvvvVAaaAaarrRRrKKKKKKkkKkkKkKKKKK!!!!
Stand in the corner and think about what you have done.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:52, archived)

I'm thinking about all the things I've done.
*evil grin*
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:58, archived)

Thanks for clearing that up.
I'd presumed it was a difference between profoundly deaf and hard of hearing.
( CowJam, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:05, archived)

pardon?

( vladimir, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:28, archived)

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

( vladimir, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:29, archived)

had the deaf person wet themselves and there were no spare pants around?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:09, archived)

They throw theirs away
after 9 years so they were sadly lacking in the pants department.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:14, archived)

poor deafos, not having the joy of cotton that cups the buttocks like a loving friend

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:17, archived)

It's discriminatory
against old pants is what it is..
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:21, archived)

Have you been to a physiotherapist? They don't let you quit.
I walked without crutches which was fairly brave, turns out my knee is jelly, and i'll limp forever. Like a mong.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:42, archived)

I'm stuck between offering sympathy to a stranger and mocking an internet cripple.
I'll let you decide.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:44, archived)

sympathy is for the cunts on QOTW.
if i wanted sympathy i'd go see my nan.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:46, archived)

*removes mask*

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:48, archived)

whoa, let us leave nans out of it, shambles gets upset and i'm having a hard time of it

( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:56, archived)

I wasn't aware nans were taboo
is this like that thing that might get you banned if you mention it?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:46, archived)

mongychops killed his nan for attention?

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:21, archived)

too far

( mongychops, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:59, archived)

Just add some custard
then it will merely be a trifling problem...
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:47, archived)

i wasn't trying to start a food thread
I'm on shaky ground as it is, you're not helping.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:50, archived)

You mentioned jelly...

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:59, archived)

i did, and i can't take it back now
can we just move on?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:02, archived)

SPONGE FINGERS!
I'm done now..
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:03, archived)

I really hope you're proud of yourself

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:07, archived)

*pats self on back*

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:13, archived)

I'm watching this thing on the Royal Ballet.
I've had a bit of stick with my shoulder but those poor bastards are physical wrecks. They retire cripples at forty. It's grim as fuck.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:51, archived)

They destroy themselves for their art.
In a way, they're committing protracted suicide for your enjoyment.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:57, archived)

You could be all like House and smash someone in the knee with your cain and go "Awww, does your leg hurt too?"

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:24, archived)

Does it count as asssault?
If not, i'm well in.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:36, archived)

negotiated the Redditch Ringroad

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:12, archived)

I fought Phantom Ganon and Volvulgia.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:12, archived)

AWESOME.
How's you, chief?
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:16, archived)

I'm good, been a shitty day here so just chillin'.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:20, archived)

Totally GAZzed you.
And, Al Jazeera calling us bothersome, I mean really.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:24, archived)

That sounds like you beat off some massive
scary vagina monster.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:17, archived)

Well, I did need to use a hammer to pound it...

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:20, archived)

Dude, how much have you been playing it? I'm only just finished the gorron temple (as a kid) on the tube home.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:25, archived)

Bought the thing saturday, played it 8 hours saturday night, probably the same sunday night and most of monday.
In ice cavern atm, at the start of it.
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:37, archived)

Wow, sweet

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:52, archived)

Hahahahahaha, chronic mental health issues, hahahahahah, it's not a _real_ illness... it's the 'bad back' of the times, innit. hahahahha, good for a few weeks off. hahahha.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:23, archived)

Shut up, bellymental.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:31, archived)

Sat in an NHS hospital for two and a half hours.

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:33, archived)

Fuck me, two and a half hours in a hospital must have cost you a fortune.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:41, archived)

I've never even fought in a war.

( WormuIus, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:39, archived)

You should try it sometime.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:42, archived)

I demanded to speak to the manager
turns out it was my fault, but still, it took some form of bravery I guess
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:00, archived)

nager dam
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:05, archived)

I drank a load of free wine in the name of advertising tonight
it was hard but someone had to do it
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:26, archived)

Wine shouldn't be hard
are you sure it wasn't dicks?
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 22:32, archived)

I'm giving you 23 quid.
Now you've got 50 quid. Buy yourself something nicer and remember that it was me that gave you 50 quid not that cheapskate polski and his 27 quid. Who the fuck gives 27 quid? Not me. You've got 50. Big and pink and crinkly. Like your vagina.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:07, archived)

With the queen's head on it.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:08, archived)

5000 penny sweet shrimps
if they are still a penny and not 4p or summink
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:08, archived)

They're probably illegal or something.
They're also shit. I bet you're only saying shrimps because you know they're shit and want people to hate you.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:10, archived)

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:08, archived)

Eaither kid's rates have gone up, or you're gonna have the orgy of your life.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:14, archived)

hmm, Dalmore or Talisker?

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:09, archived)

Highland Park.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:09, archived)

What's the one with the black and white scotchie dogs on it?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:10, archived)

shortbread, you daft twat

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:11, archived)

My shortbread tin has a really bad picture of Edingburrow Castle on it.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:12, archived)

Stop it.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:15, archived)

Ye no ken fit am on aboot?
The castle in edingburrow.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:19, archived)

Stop it now...

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:20, archived)

I once caught a train from Birmingham to Glasgow with an american couple on their way to Edinburgh
and I swear I couldn't get them to pronounce either fucking name properly for the whole fucking trip. Edinburrow? BirmingHAM? BirmingHUM? Edinbow?

They'll never find the bodies.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:23, archived)

Edinbarooga

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:25, archived)

I went to primary school at George Heriots in Edinburgh
We had a "Royal Visit" and someone wrote that the Jookie Embra had visited, and got their ignorance in the school magazine for all to mock for eternity. Like I'm doing now, many decades later.
( Three Dog Man, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:50, archived)

Hahaha.
Jookie Embra is my favourite minor Star Wars character.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:53, archived)

Ha ha!

( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:21, archived)

no, the castle really does look like that

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:18, archived)

I bet you've got one of those drummer boy dolls in a plastic tube as well.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:19, archived)

I'd fucking love one of those.
And an och aye jimmy wig. And a stuffed highland coooo.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:21, archived)

Fuck knows.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:15, archived)

Black and White Scotch.
If only I'd put some sort of clue in the question.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:16, archived)

Never heard of it.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:18, archived)

It's what people buy when they can't even afford Bells.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:20, archived)

Bells is horrific.
A glass of piss would be better.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:21, archived)

It's pretty good in a Manhattan.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:25, archived)

If I could only afford Bells I'd stick to Irn Bru,
it tastes about as much like whisky.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:22, archived)

Irn Bru is pretty shit in a Manhattan.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:26, archived)

I don't know what a Manhattan is.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:27, archived)

It's a cocktail. Whisky/whiskey, sweet vermouth and angostura bitters.
A proper cocktail. Not a massive fucking glass of ice and coke served by an over-preened teen who genuinely thinks that juggling bottles doesn't make him worse than a cunt.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:29, archived)

Is that a Manhattan?
doesn't sound too bad.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:32, archived)

PURE BOOZE.
And you get a cherry. Which isn't gay if you have it in a Manhattan. Because there's only booze in a Manhattan.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:34, archived)

I don't like cherries.
You've ruined it.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:34, archived)

to be fair,
for a proper Manhattan, it's both sweet and dry vermouth in equal measures, with twice as much blended whisky as vermouth combined. Just sweet vermouth is for ladies.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:34, archived)

Fuck off back to wikipedia.
You probably have fucking lime in your g&t.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:38, archived)

Fuck off yourself
I was a cocktail barman for a long time. You can have it sweet if you want, it just makes you a girl.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:43, archived)

I bet you were one of those over-preened juggling cunts serving iced coke and cheapshit rum to cunts with their fucking ben sherman shirts untucked and too much fucking hair gel.
Like some sort of cunt.

There's no point putting dry fucking vermouth into whisky and fucking bitters, you tongue-spaz.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:46, archived)

Never flared, it's a waste of time
I enjoyed mixing drinks, i still do, and prefer my manhattans perfect, not sweet. Fuck, it's a drink.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:53, archived)

Untucked Ben Sherman Shirts.
And too much coke.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:57, archived)

to be honest
it was big fucking tips when they were showing off, and some decent customers when it wasn't the weekend, and i enjoyed learning to mix decent drinks. Some people who drink cocktails aren't cunts.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 21:06, archived)

I prefer a Vatican
it's like a Manhattan but it's with Catholic bitters rather than angostura ones. The taste has a bit more conviction.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:35, archived)

I am quite fond of Manhattans.

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:37, archived)

They are the future.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:39, archived)

I think it's called Black and White.
Haven't seen it for years though.

[Edit] Damn- too slow.
( Lord Gnome, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:16, archived)

sorry MGT, Ascot was last week, it's too late to place your bets now

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:10, archived)

Fuck off topping up my gift and calling yourself the better uncle, you cheapskate
your just money laundering my good strong Polish currency and passing it off as your own crippled pound, ya tax dodger.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:10, archived)

50 quid.
Match that Uncle Zloty.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:11, archived)

Sisters of Mercy had a line that went "counterfeit dollars or the English zloty"
and now every time I hear that I'll think of you, you money-grubbing bastard
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:18, archived)

I like the way he didn't top you, he's only put in £23, but looks like the better person.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:15, archived)

no ta
can't stand all that 'yo yo yo, we gon' party like it's ya birthday' rubbish.

oh shit wrong currency.
( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:12, archived)

A used pair of Katy Perry's tights. Off the internet somewhere.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:13, archived)

She's quite attractive.
But stale cunt on nylon is never a winner.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:14, archived)

This is what I would do, if I came into that sum of money.
I'd phone up my mum and say "Hay ma, what are you doing on saturday? Fancy getting a maternay?" and if she was free, she'd get the train up to southgate from cockfosters where I'd meet her, give her a hug and a kiss, and then back on the train - don't worry, I have a monthly Oyster and she has her Ken Livingstone Prezzy. So we'd make our way up to lecster square and see those booths that sale tickets that haven't been sold yet, you can pick up good tickets for £20ish, espesh on a maternay. The trick is not to have anything specific in mind, last one we saw was Wicked, which was marvoulous, really amazing set, buetiful costumes and singing and oh god this morphine and diazipam is kicking in and I'm about half an inch above my body right now as I haven't had any all day. I think we'll go and see Ghost maybe, or Les Mis would be good to see if that bloke from Little Britain is in it. I'm easy going, I don't mind what we see. But that's what I would do, and if there is any change, actually, if there isn't I'd pay anyway, we'd get a coffee and share a slice of cake. Oh no, I forgot about getting some malteezers for the film, I've gone over budget, but I'll get that anyway, I don't mind really, anything to make my Ma' happy.

I think that would be a splended day, hold on one moment while I call her to let her know my friend on the internet has given me some money to take her out. She needs it, close family friend died this week, she could do with the day out. Thank you so much.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:13, archived)

39 Steps is good gonz, take yer ma to see that. I paid a tenner for that too.

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:15, archived)

What's it about?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:18, archived)

four people join Narcotics Anonymous
one guy drops out.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:20, archived)

comedy remake of the John Buchan novel/Hitchcock film, spiffing 1930s thriller involving spies and a dashing hero who gets the gal in the end.
only 4 cast members, they play all the parts, hilarity ensues. It's at the Criterion, Piccadilly Circus.

www.love39steps.com/
( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:20, archived)

I'm soundsless where I'm at, at the mo', but it looks good.
I want to see that one with the horse.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:25, archived)

War Horse? I want to see that too. maybe we should have a romantic evening at the theatre together cuddling up and snogging in the back row.

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:26, archived)

That's the one, the movement on it is amazing, they had a thing on it on BBC Breakfast. I'd be up for that.
If Shambles increases his budget I want to go to see the spiderman one in New York, I don't care how shit they say it is, for that kind of dosh the sets and stunts will be amazing.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:30, archived)

Save your money and watch the Batman show instead.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:36, archived)

You'll only spend it on smack, you fucking junkie.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:15, archived)

She's delighted, thank you so much, it's made her so happy.
I'll bring you back reciepts if you want.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:18, archived)

Good Doctor
Make it another tenner and me and cowjam have got a a spaceship.
www.b3ta.com/talk/7222998
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:14, archived)

An autographed picture of Britain's Sweeheart, Cheryl Cole!

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:15, archived)

*kicks in door of newsagents* SHOPKEEP! 5000 OF YOUR FINEST PENNY SWEETS PLEASE!!

( Lightguy hail satan, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:24, archived)

Fat

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:28, archived)

'why certainly sir. 5000 black jacks? that's a lot of black jacks sir. that's immigration for you sir, gor blimey, send em all back I say'

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:29, archived)

I'm giving you 27 quid, buy yourself something nice.
What have you bought, you revolting commercial shopping scum?
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:33, archived)

Curtain poles.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:35, archived)

for 27 quid? how much do they cost per foot?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:38, archived)

Fuck knows.
I dare say I could get 2 for that.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:38, archived)

2 feet? that's a very narrow window

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:40, archived)

I meant 2 poles. Sorry for the confusion.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:40, archived)

I'm sure grrry can kidnap you a couple and send them over bound and gagged

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:41, archived)

there's plenty here thanks.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:42, archived)

WHOOP WHOOP!
CASUAL RACISM ALERT.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:42, archived)

casual racism always sounds so half-arsed. you could at least try and do it properly.

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:46, archived)

Formal racism.
Black Thai.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:48, archived)

very good

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:50, archived)

bravo

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:03, archived)

Haha

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:07, archived)

nice one MGT! :)

( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:19, archived)

racist

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:43, archived)

I'll send him a couple of fat ones
now that we've got bacon in the supermarkets, we're also getting muffin tops.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:43, archived)

POLSKI SKLEP

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:47, archived)

Polski sklep sells artykuly spozywcze
swieze kazdego dnia, so you know it's not shit
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:51, archived)

I don't know what any of that means, I only know Polski Sklep :(((((((((((

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:52, archived)

well what does a sklep sell?
it sells foodstuffs, fresh every day. Polish isn't hard*.


*it's arsebendingly impossible
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:53, archived)

is sklep shop then? I thought it meant food. Fuck, I don't even actually know what polski sklep means after all :((((((((((((((((((((((((((

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:55, archived)

Polski Sklep is Polish Shop
a shop that sells Polish stuff like flaki (pig guts), kiszel (a sort of readymix fruit jelly like Angel Delight) and klopsiki in a jar (meatballs).

Now we've got bacon over here, I reckon we got a much better deal.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:58, archived)

We got quite a few in Bristol
Lot's of stuff in jars that look a bit scary.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:59, archived)

that's what I was thinking of - the dodgy looking sausages in pickle jars

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:01, archived)

the polski skleps round here seem to sell a wide variety of suspicious looking meat products.
is bacon only a recent innovation in pooland then?
( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:00, archived)

yeah
millions and millions of pigs, but they don't know how to slice the fuckers up. Or rather, the premium grade meat gets sold to the Krauts, and the Poles eat the leftovers, because they love hooves and guts and lard. Ham's good though.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:09, archived)

Me nana
used to feed me pigs trotters and cold tripe covered in vinegar. Nowt wrong wi'that.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:15, archived)

It was her way of telling you that she wished you'd die in a concentration camp

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:23, archived)

I'm not that fucking old..

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:44, archived)

So that's what flaki is
I had a suspicion that it was something along the lines of tripe. It looks rather unappetising floating around in jars of brine.
( Lord Gnome, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:16, archived)

27 digital copies of Swagger Jagger.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:35, archived)

Or 1.3 physical copies.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:37, archived)

I just don't know why you'd do that, I don't even know you any more, or ever did.

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:47, archived)

Awwww..and I wasted mine on nuts.

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:50, archived)

The Back To The Future trilogy, some popcorn and a bottle of lemon Fanta.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:35, archived)

pco
( broadsword now that's fresh, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:38, archived)

yeah, for that I'll even throw in a back issue of Delorean Monthly

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:47, archived)

petril

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:36, archived)

That's cheese.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:37, archived)

:(

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:40, archived)

Go kill self with petril.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:40, archived)

LOLDRUGS

( spesh., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:48, archived)

I dunno it's not quite enough for a decent bottle of whisky,
but rather more than I'd usually spend on anything else.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:36, archived)

although my Amazon wishlist probably adds up to about that.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:39, archived)

and I could do with some new underpants

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:42, archived)

I approve of new pants
I reckon most people own at least one pair that's a decade old
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:45, archived)

I think the last time I bought any was about four years ago,
I occasionally have to throw a pair away because the elastic has gone, and I now have to do my washing a lot more often than I used to.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:47, archived)

My oldest pair at the moment are six years old. I love them.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:49, archived)

That's just you
you tight git.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:53, archived)

I think I still own a pair that I had when I moved over here
and that was seven years ago, and they weren't new then.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:54, archived)

Do they now have a life of their own?

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 20:00, archived)

wine

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:37, archived)

9 bottles?

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:38, archived)

I'm not homeless.

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:39, archived)

you just look it.
and act like it.




and smell like it.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:48, archived)

fine but I don't drink piss wine!

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:55, archived)

you just drink, then piss, then whine

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:58, archived)

Wine not?

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:42, archived)

That's the sort of attitude we need 'round here

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 21 Jun 2011, 19:46, archived)