Kings Of Leon are massive racists
According to the producer of The Rakes' last album.

100% TRUFAX
(The Marsh man of 1004 holds, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:48, archived)

FASCINATING.

( SuperMatt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:48, archived)

how thrilling, darling

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:49, archived)

great!
I'd never have suspected the possibility that a band consisting of entirely white working class Tennessee American males might have some kind of racist thoughts!

Well done, there
( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:49, archived)

Amazing

( Anthropos Was making beer on, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:49, archived)

i hear mansun are making a comeback

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:49, archived)

Oh brill
I loved Mmmbop
(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:50, archived)

I GET IT

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:51, archived)

I hope not
I don't want old regional accented whiney indie competing with new regional accented whiney indie.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:51, archived)

LIES

( executiverocker only wears C&A, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 18:12, archived)

A friend was in Poland at a festival and he said they were the most boring band he's ever seen. didn't even look up or say hello.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:49, archived)

I saw them live and they were ace

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:50, archived)

But also tried to fuck my dick with your dick so your opinion is...
INVALID
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:51, archived)

they tried forced docking?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:53, archived)

You tried to dock me through your trousers :'(

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:54, archived)

damn those trousers

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:57, archived)

Was it the Open'er?
My missus just came back from that and said she fell asleep on her feet during them, which was a shame as Lilly Allen was on before and no-one was paying her any notice because they were waiting for the KoL.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:50, archived)

that is was :)

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:52, archived)

Apparently the audience was 80% English people
primarily because Poles can't afford to take that long off work to sit in a field having their ears pounded.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:53, archived)

e

+e

go on, work it out. It'll take ages.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:55, archived)

this had better not be a football-related joke
because it will be wasted on me
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:58, archived)

does half a second count as ages?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:58, archived)

it does, yes.
in your world of speed.

i thought it was quite good as strikethroughs go.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 18:06, archived)

Oh nooo
Ohhhhh nooooooo
( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:49, archived)

i need to start a list of which ones of you are merely idiots and which ones are idiots that think they are funny

( well, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:49, archived)

well

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:50, archived)

I AM FUNNY

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:52, archived)

SSG is funny.
That's all anybody needs to know.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:53, archived)

See my name.
That's you that is.
(shitcunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:50, archived)

This is not relevant to my interests.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:52, archived)

You can't argue with sources as reliable as The Producer of The Rakes' Last Album, can you?

( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:53, archived)

who the fuck are the Rakes anyway?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:54, archived)

Yes.
Another reason why none of you fall out with me as much these days is because you can't huddle your fat selves into groups, like you used to.
Especially now Mykey has me on uber-dooper block. He was practically a shoe-in.

I'm prepared to offer myself now as the VICTOR in the fight against miserable, fat people's internet.
No longer do you people have to suffer the indignation of turning up on the internet to read about some fat fucker's day on World of Warcraft.
No longer must you sit here and wait out the time between the start of a lunch thread, and the long, tedious drawn out process whilst a man in the Midlands goes through the contents of a Heinz tinned pudding.
NO LONGER must you fear coming in at night to find four to five fuller-cheeked, muffin hipped internet w4rlords using their best comic book insults on your hero.

JMG has won.
Another victory over shit people's internet. *JMG Anthem*
Everybody on your feet.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:39, archived)

What about a skinny fuck's day on World of Warcraft?

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:40, archived)

There's remnants of dull remaining, DG.
But in time we, the better internet hope to eradicate such practices through the introduction of sexier internet, and GMoS Thursday.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:42, archived)

Jammy, you will also be please that I got a 1st round 13 second KO with Hatton vs Manny on FN4

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:44, archived)

That's very impressive, yes.
I've hardly had a crack at it.
However I'm a three belt holder. I could attach them all together and sell them to ********.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:45, archived)

It was a mighty RB Left Hook fluke. It's only the demo. I may still have to buy.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:47, archived)

I played that on the demo
and hardly grazed the opponent.
( executiverocker only wears C&A, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:47, archived)

I was playing the demo too.
It's all about just holding down R1 and left hook right hook left hook right hook and then finishing with uppercuts. jabs does fuck all :)
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:48, archived)

VIVE LE CHATEAU NOUVEAU! VIVE LA TOON! VIVE JMG!

( ArthurTheRat, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:41, archived)

PLANTIN' ME FLAG MAN JIMMY NAIL PET.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:42, archived)

FOUND IT!
www.b3ta.com/talk/4574680
(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:41, archived)

WHAAY HEY!!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:42, archived)

Why did you explode at me?
Everybody has said similar at some point.
Friz :(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:44, archived)

I do apologise
I can't believe that was March 08 though. I thought it was like, 2006. There we go.
(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:46, archived)

*fireworks*

( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:41, archived)

i can fall out with you if you like
how does it work? i imagine it's like professional wrestling, we discuss before hand on msn roughly how it's going to go and then we head over to /talk to duke it out?
( well, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:42, archived)

Have they brought the coffin out yet?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:42, archived)

Yay!

(Woggy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:42, archived)

alright woggy

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:43, archived)

Is it Tuesday already?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:44, archived)

apparently so :(

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:45, archived)

How do new 'whose name I'm not sure is racist or not so I won't say anything as that might make me a racist' person

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:46, archived)

Hello new person!

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:46, archived)

Sod off.

(shitcunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:47, archived)

alright shitcunt

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:48, archived)

not just a clever name then

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:48, archived)

Oh splendid stuff!
Top notch internet ribaldry and messageboard banter.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:51, archived)

well said, old fellow

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:52, archived)

Rather, what what?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:54, archived)

Peterborough

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:42, archived)

never been
is it nice?
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:43, archived)

no, it's shit

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:44, archived)

Crusty rolls from Morrisons are disappointing :(

( executiverocker only wears C&A, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:46, archived)

did you check the date on them first?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:48, archived)

Fresh as a daisy
If the daisies were fresh out of the oven.
( executiverocker only wears C&A, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:50, archived)

*gets to feet*
*salutes*
*sheds a single tear*
( SuperMatt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:47, archived)

Oh JMG, this made me smile a bit.
MORE HAPPY PLEASE.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:49, archived)

I AM A 37 YEAR OLD MAN GOING DANCING
/ac

I was going to say "I am delighted" but this seems equally appropriate.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:49, archived)

FATTIES!
Who's got you all a-grumblin'?
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:02, archived)

i feel ill
who should i blame?
( well, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:03, archived)

I feel like I'm around 85%.
You may wish to thump your keyboard with remarks of unrest.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:04, archived)

I've just found a magnificent 'I'm not falling out with JMG' thread that I've gazzed to Mike Woz Ere.
www.b3ta.com/talk/4665805
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:16, archived)

when you say found,
how exactly did you find that?
( well, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:17, archived)

He spends all day looking.

(shitcunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:20, archived)

i want to distance myself from the idea that i was implying this
i was merely curious
( well, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:21, archived)

SexFace is always MSNing me, now.
:(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:24, archived)

www.b3tards.com/u/ae794ee1094f93ba0605/jmg_final.jpg
(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:31, archived)

GANGING UP!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:32, archived)

I just searched my posts for a flounce I did at you when I was new here
But I can't find it anywhere :(
(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:33, archived)

That's efficient flouncing there, Friz.

( thealternativefact, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:34, archived)

There's got to be loads of threads or instances now of 2, 3 or even it being 4 or 5 on to JMG at a time in these arguments.
Mykey's usually one of them.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:33, archived)

haha
you're still near the topping well. try a subfred daaahn love
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:33, archived)

hah, he is actually living with his mum!
i get it!
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:36, archived)

also,
you are way better at hands than devil duck.
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:36, archived)

I didn't draw that

(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:49, archived)

you stomach, hire someone to give it a good kicking

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:17, archived)

I'm blaming JMG, right now

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:03, archived)

It's only natural.
I've won, and made healthy gains all over the shop, today.
Somebody's going to be livid.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:04, archived)

I'm always livid at you,
especially when you're not online to see me.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:08, archived)

...
...
(shitcunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:04, archived)

The good thing about b3ta is I am in control.
Of the mood, the fashion, the popular terms.
All of the important bits.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:05, archived)

I'm happy, I can have a lie in tomorrow
after getting up all week at 4.30am.
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:04, archived)

*Firm handshakes*

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:05, archived)

I've just made pasties, I'm as happy as can be.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:04, archived)

cornish?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:05, archived)

Too right.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:06, archived)

I bet you're a side crimping cunt.

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:19, archived)

Is this bad, then?

( thealternativefact, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:30, archived)

Yes.

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:38, archived)

OHH INTERNET.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:05, archived)

It's raining.

( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:05, archived)

Chin up.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:05, archived)

HAIL!

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:19, archived)

AND LIGHTNING AND THUNDERS!

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:24, archived)

And car alarms going ape shit.

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:24, archived)

FATTY
i31.tinypic.com/1zlsw2s.jpg
( Lightguy hail satan, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:06, archived)

Moohalaa?

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:06, archived)

hahaha

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:08, archived)

I remember that show, it made me feel really sorry for that kid
Especialy when he Asked that girl to marry him and she said no.

I was quite turned on too.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:15, archived)

www.b3ta.cr3ation.co.uk/data/jpg/jmgineedcake.jpg
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:20, archived)

newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/42839000/jpg/_42839973_newcastlefan270.jpg
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:25, archived)

HAHAHA!
FUCK YES!
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:28, archived)

Pffffft
/officelols
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:31, archived)

I had to give a presentation at the Joint Managment Group today
shortened to JMG.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:07, archived)

Did you all fall out with it?
You should have had some kind of internet uplink so you could find out new, fresh terms to use against the JMG.
Like, it lives with his mother.
Or that it lives with it's mother.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:10, archived)

There were two balds in the meeting.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:13, archived)

Oh JMG!
It was my day off today but I had to go to work for a training course. An hour across town, I get there and THEY'VE CANCELLED THE FUCKING COURSE WITHOUT TELLING ME. Naturally, I blamed JMG.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:09, archived)

Buggers!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:11, archived)

Did they eventually get someone to come in and train you?

( Mrs Sp@m, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:32, archived)

Microsoft have given me 50 gigs of storage on their Azure cloud storage preview
I might write a web application involving breasts and bumholes to test it
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:10, archived)

You STILL refuse to make that Internet McTruth Generator you promised.
I'm considering taking Baldmonkey hostage until you meet my demands.
By "hostage" I mean bowling. But it's still terrifying in itself.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:12, archived)

I've got something very similar waiting to go live, when I can be arsed getting a webshite together again
this cloud storage thing might be the answer, I'll have a look at it and report back
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:13, archived)

Hooray!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:14, archived)

I bought some crusty rolls and PREMIUM meat earlier in Morrisons
I can't wait to feast.
( executiverocker only wears C&A, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:11, archived)

Careful there.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:12, archived)

PREMIUM meat, JMG
PREMIUM
( executiverocker only wears C&A, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:13, archived)

Premium meaning 'contains a few more animal products and less ash'

( moohalaa, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:22, archived)

There is now less than 89% fat and eyes

( executiverocker only wears C&A, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:25, archived)

I hear Gonzo tried to buy some of that but he came home with perineum meat

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:23, archived)

i'm going to get my results tomorrow
i'm going to fail each subject, and IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!
( weaver., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:12, archived)

*Fists on hips. General laughter.*

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:15, archived)

Look on the bright side
KFC are always hiring
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:16, archived)

Don't get me started, I'll be here all night.

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:18, archived)

The internet needs more happy stories.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:30, archived)

nothing at all.
I'm getting £50 cash in hand for an hours worth of 'focus group' later on today. Score.
( moohalaa, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:20, archived)

focus group?
look into my eyes, look into my eyes, the eyes, the eyes, not around the eyes, don't look around the eyes...?
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:28, archived)

TAX AVOIDING TRUMPET TICKLER!
Good luck with this.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 17:31, archived)

+N
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/8137849.stm
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:03, archived)

Shit, who kidnapped the pope?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:05, archived)

Cats

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:06, archived)

i think i fancy tim minchin.

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:15, archived)

I fancy you.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:19, archived)

I think I fancy him morer, or even morest.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:22, archived)

Like propper fancy him.
I'ld like to introduce him to my family.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:22, archived)

I want him to hold me in his big arms and snuzzle my face agmonst his chesthair.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:23, archived)

I would feel so safe against all the horrible things in this world.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:23, archived)

I'm also gazzing the mods over Friz's disgusting hijacking of SSG's Tragic Illness in a bid for yet more unfunny, large-faced attention.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:27, archived)

I think it's quite out of order.
If ♥S♥S♥G♥ has asked him to stop, then he should.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:31, archived)

i hate to disappoint you,
but i don't really have very much chest hair at all :(
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:46, archived)

CURSE YOU CHEMOTHERAPY

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:48, archived)

As long as I find out, offline, I don't mind.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:49, archived)

Stop it.
You have a girlfriend. She is very beautiful!
( The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:21, archived)

No Baroness, YOU are beautiful.

( TonyUNDERSCORE from the Internet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:52, archived)

I don't get the +N

(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:07, archived)

I think it's meant to be NUN
But I could very well be wrong.
( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:07, archived)

yes.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:09, archived)

Didn't want to be the first to say this.
Probably alright to call Godzuki a shit cunt now.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:07, archived)

:D

(shitcunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:09, archived)

haha who are you?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:11, archived)

i'm shitcunt

(shitcunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:14, archived)

Hello comedy name newbie.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:11, archived)

Totally Gilgamesh here.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:14, archived)

Sounds like something on the cartoon network that makes children cry.

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:15, archived)

you fat gay spastic

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:24, archived)

lol shut up Gilgamesh.
Or should I say SHITCUNT
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:27, archived)

you know what, right, this place would be rubbish without me

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:37, archived)

Totally not.

(shitcunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:28, archived)

I like the cut of your jib.

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:25, archived)

_________ShitCunt____________ShitCunt
______ShitCunt ShitC_______ShitCunt ShitCun
____ShitCunt ShitCunt S___ShitCunt ShitCunt S
___ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitC_______Shit
__ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitC_________Shit
_ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt _______Shit
_ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt Shit______S
ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt__Shi
ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt Sh_S
ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt Shit
ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt Shit
_ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt Sh
__ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt
____ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCu
______ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt S
_________ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCunt Shit
____________ShitCunt ShitCunt ShitCun
______________ShitCunt ShitCunt Sh
_________________ShitCunt Shit
___________________ShitCunt
_____________________ShitCu
______________________Shit
_______________________Sh
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:27, archived)

This is shit, you're shit and your face is shit.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:32, archived)

And for that reason, I'm out.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:34, archived)

haha!
THIS IS A NEW MEME.
( TonyUNDERSCORE from the Internet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:53, archived)

YEAH
SHITCUNT
(shitcunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:40, archived)

it's never wrong.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:09, archived)

press control>alt>delete>+N

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:08, archived)

Holy fuck!
They're gonna wheel out Jacko's coffin on stage!
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:07, archived)

What telivision do you have?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:09, archived)

They just announced it on bbc five live

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:09, archived)

So you're anouncing something on telly you're not even watching?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:41, archived)

Have they greased up the stage so the coffin can slide backwards slowly?

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:09, archived)

Couldn't really get him to do it himself.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:10, archived)

I hope a tornado comes and he pops up and starts screaming and holding onto shit like he does in the Earth Song.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:12, archived)

A bit of his skin would just catch on a nail in the wall
and his bones would clatter together like wind chimes.
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:14, archived)

then the last 2 bars of 'Bad' plays
dun Dun DUN...WHOSE BAAD.

followed by a post death prolapse
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:17, archived)

..and the crowd goes wild

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:29, archived)

How nice

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:12, archived)

Hopefully he'll burst out and do the Thriller dance

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:12, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/6281904
( Jenk Neptune is a pedant and now I can't fit my sig in, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:21, archived)

www.collegehumor.com/video:1916427
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:37, archived)

What the fuck?

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:44, archived)

Hahahaha

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:44, archived)

Why do fat people always try to copy that dance?

( SuperMatt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:47, archived)

Is she fat?

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:54, archived)

It's funny because the Pope has more power than the UN :/

( ArthurTheRat, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:09, archived)

www.b3ta.cr3ation.co.uk/data/gif/unwteeth.gif
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:12, archived)

Good news time.
Panic At The Disco have split up.

Tell me something good.
( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:59, archived)

I'm moving house tomorrow

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:59, archived)

HUZZAH!

this has made my day, thankyou
(front_2_back is further inland from the coast than anyone else, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:59, archived)

The singer and drummer are carrying on the band name and replacing the guitarist and bassist.

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:00, archived)

It won't happen.
And at any rate, won't be the same band. They've lost their best member
( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:00, archived)

Did you receive my Random Burn disk?

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:03, archived)

Yes I did! I forgot to update the sig!
EDIT: Done! Thanks for the CD!
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:04, archived)

no worries
saw your sig and thought you hadn't had it yet
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:07, archived)

I'm going to see that new film tonight with that bloke in,
I'm going with a girl I find attractive.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:00, archived)

I have unpacked, hurray.
I might dye my hair in a bit. It's all go.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:00, archived)

I'm house-hunting.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:00, archived)

-hunting in'
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:02, archived)

we're doing that too
it's a PAIN IN THE ARSE
( crazyjude is very happy with happytoast and his skill, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:02, archived)

^sadly this.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:04, archived)

I found it quite easy
I went outside and I saw this sign that said 'To Let', so I rang the number and I said "Can I live there please?" and the lady said "Yeah, alright then."
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:09, archived)

As would I.
However, I'm going to be sharing with a couple, and the female is, as females are wont to be over certain things, neurotic over the issue.
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:14, archived)

Fucks sake
Slap her about a bit
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:24, archived)

Wormulus has died.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:01, archived)

It's not true but wouldn't that be something special if it happened.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:01, archived)

:(

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:02, archived)

Happy candleday Lully.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:04, archived)

I went through such a range of emotion reading those two posts.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:03, archived)

*walks out from a massive crowd*
*stands in front of them all*
*opens hands*
*reveal a white dove*
*releases the dove*
*the crowd watch the dove fly away*
*I quietly whisper... "Peace"*
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:04, archived)

*the dove is then killed by a massive cock tuesday riding on the back of a double-headed comedy account*

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:07, archived)

I'm hereby throwing my hat into the ring to take the mantle of Wormulus.
The previous Wormulus, Sebastian Winnett, scarf-wearing cockhound, served us well.
( ArthurTheRat, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:08, archived)

Utah Saints
U U U U U Utah Saints
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:01, archived)

I met them at a club in Northampton.

( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:02, archived)

I met them when I did work experience
at a local radio station when I was 15.

OLD.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:03, archived)

I wasn't really sure who they were.
My 2 mates were like "FUCKING HELL YES"
( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:04, archived)

My norks look GREAT in this tee shirt

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:01, archived)

Shame about your fat camel toe in those jeans.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:02, archived)

It's true, you know.
Still, the tee shirt is long enough to cover that. YES.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:03, archived)

Your norks look Great in any tee shirt you wear.

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:02, archived)

Is it a space invaders t-shirt?

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:03, archived)

It's a t-shirt with a picture of some great norks on it.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:05, archived)

No.
It's a Take That tee shirt.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:07, archived)

fucking hell I was almost killed trying to get my missus a take that programme at the Cardiff gig
those girls get very angry.
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:11, archived)

THAT THAT
NURR, THICKO
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:29, archived)

To compensate for taking two days off
my secretaries have given me a double work load for tomorrow. I have to do a full 8 hours.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 16:04, archived)

Oh fucking hell.
Just to push him down the board.

Hello. What's shaking, you gorgeous beings?
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:29, archived)

My fist.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:29, archived)

Oh aye?

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)

INNN RAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEE

( TonyUNDERSCORE from the Internet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)

AT THE THUNDER

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:36, archived)

I AM THE LAW.
/judge-dredd.
( TonyUNDERSCORE from the Internet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)

THERE IS NO SPOON
/SuperMatt
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:47, archived)

I'm surprisingly well moneyed
I might buy a toy
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:29, archived)

Ooh Monkey with cymbals!

( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)

Nice one

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)

BUY ME SOMETHING

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)

Alright
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)

I don't know.
Get me something fabulous.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:32, archived)

Some Polos

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:32, archived)

PEEP-HOLE BRA

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:32, archived)

I've seen her tits
There'd be no peeping
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:33, archived)

YUK

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:36, archived)

WITH FIRECROTCHLESS PANTIES

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:41, archived)

You're a sick man

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:42, archived)

My extremities.
/low blood sugar.
( The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)

Get this man a doughnut.

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)

With chocolate icing!
STAT!
( The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:33, archived)

I'm like a victim of a sexy crime, only I've been stabbed with the hot knife and pummelled with a phwoar bat.

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)

PHWOAR!

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)

... I've not got anyone on ignore so I don't know who you want to push down because no one shit has posted
apart from you, twatfeatures.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)

*shrug*

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:32, archived)

Not much. I hung out loads of washing, unpacked and will clean the bathroom whilst the Sims 2 Nightlife is installing.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:30, archived)

WOWSERS

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:32, archived)

lol i got locked on a empty train
i had to bang like a mong on the drivers window to get someone to let me out
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)

Each time you mention this I will call you a mong
MONG
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:32, archived)

lololol i so am
well disappointed with the drivers cabin bit. fucking dull, i wanted some buttons to push
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:33, archived)

You need a key for cool shit to happen and beep and that

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:34, archived)

I saw that.
I did do LOLS
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:33, archived)

i sat there for fucking half hour

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:34, archived)

Were you on the only train IN THE WORLD
With no emergency door release handles?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:36, archived)

£50 fine for improper use though

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:37, archived)

Ultimate shame for being fucking spasticated enough to get locked on

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)

Yes this

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:42, archived)

nein.
it was my platform. and it was their errrrrror.
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:43, archived)

How did you get locked on a train?

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:47, archived)

The guard walked through and mistook her for an old bag.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:54, archived)

Michael J Fox

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)

I'm deeply in love with you.

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)

You bum lords.
I see your double Michael J Fox and raise you a Muhammad Ali.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:34, archived)

Shakey J beats Muhammad Wobli hands down.

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:37, archived)

*splorf*
ahahaha!
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:42, archived)

We talked about this and we both agreed no.

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:45, archived)

Michael J Fox

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)

A guy added me on FB and his hobbies include collecting Weebles
WEEBLES
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)

OH THEO.
Did you add yourself?
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:35, archived)

I collect porcelain fairies
AS WELL YOU KNOW
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:35, archived)

I'm organising the SSG Farewell Tour
Who wants to do sound?
(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:31, archived)

Who is SSG anyway?

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:32, archived)

I'll perform "Rhythm is a Cancer"

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:33, archived)

Excellent

(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:36, archived)

FUCK YOU FRIZ
STOP TRIVIALISING MY ILLNESS, FUCKING SERIOUSLY.
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:44, archived)

This funky, funky beat.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:33, archived)

I can't bake cookies.
I just can't.
( Bats, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:35, archived)

I haven't tried baking cookies yet.
I might try on Friday.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:35, archived)

it's staff training day
so far, it's going BRILLIANT
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:36, archived)

I'm going to make myself a billionaire.
When I do that, i'll buy a road and you can have one of the houses.

If anyone pisses me off, I'll rent out one of the houses to smack-heads at £1/year.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:37, archived)

My hips



I think the screws have come loose :(
( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)

I'm excited for a party tonight, and for when I can get home and read a new book.

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)

I'm mooshing my boobies together as well speak

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:38, archived)

My gigantic quivering testicle.
I keep it in the loft.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:39, archived)

Half of the Sinai Peninsula

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:40, archived)

THE CRICKET!
THEY ARE DOING THE CRICKET JUST ROUND THE CORNER FROM ME, A WELSH!
very exciting.
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:43, archived)

I am in a good mood
My car isn't costing as much as I thought it would and tomorrow is my last day at work this week. Yey. *does a little dance*
( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:45, archived)

My Nan

( The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:47, archived)

I'm considering a part-time job working in a mortuary
Money's good and I'm not put off by dead people but it's just the smell that bothers me. What do you think?
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:28, archived)

Dead people can't smell, you'll be alright

( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:29, archived)

I don't think they'll mind

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:29, archived)

That Mykey's joke down there was good

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:29, archived)

209.85.229.132/search?q=cache:AnYuteDJjacJ:www.whatthetrend.com/trend/P%2BJade%2BGoody+What+are+Farrah+Fawcett+and+Michael+Jackson+expecting+for+Xmas%3F&cd=10&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=uk
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:41, archived)

I think I'm going out for a while,
and if there aren't any better threads than this when I get back, I'm going out again.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:29, archived)

I think you should go for it
put up stiff upper lip
( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:29, archived)

steer clear, it'll only be a dead-end job
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:29, archived)

Who's going to watch the farewell concert for Jacko on tv?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

nope.

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

I don't think he'll turn up.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

ha ha

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:25, archived)

actually, he will..
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/8137700.stm
( Jenk Neptune is a pedant and now I can't fit my sig in, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:37, archived)

Whos on the bill?

(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

Reg Hollis?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:20, archived)

June Ackland?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:20, archived)

The rest of the duck!

( The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:24, archived)

I shall be starting work just as it kicks off.
I'll have to watch it on Youtube or something.
( Bats, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

ram it up your nan

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:19, archived)

HAHA TRAIN FAIL

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:21, archived)

This too
We check ours for mongs like her when we lock up
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:23, archived)

''Driver! Driver! Please, I'm locked in the train!''.
Fucking hell.
( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:23, archived)

no cunt was in there
I WILL TELL THE FULL STORY LATER
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:26, archived)

The Truly Fascinating one you were trying to read?

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:28, archived)

People interested in watching the farewell concert who couldnt be there in person
I'd imagine
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:19, archived)

I'm going to do my own tribute.
I'm going to black up and then get in the shower and turn white again. I may sing a song about Rats.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:19, archived)

Not him, I expect.
Which rather defeats the object.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:19, archived)

I'll be watching Farewell Farrah Fawcett on Friday on Five From Five

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:19, archived)

What are Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson expecting for Xmas?
Patrick Swayze
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:21, archived)

Haha

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:22, archived)

haha oh dear

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:22, archived)

Pfft
Nice
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:24, archived)

I'm sad now :(
but I did lol
( J-Rod chortled as he came, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 19:22, archived)

Oh I might watch this

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:21, archived)

I'm going to sound my Michael Jackson klaxon whilst driving in my Datsun.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:21, archived)

is it an anglo saxon jackson Klaxon?

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:23, archived)

With wax on?

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:24, archived)

it's a bit late now, isn't it?

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:19, archived)

no
it starts at 5.30pm
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:23, archived)

oops wrong jacko
www.youtube.com/watch?v=N5iTMiUZctM
( Zank Frappa Who let the lefties in?, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:20, archived)

Fuck no.
I'll wait for the DVD.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:21, archived)

Do you live your whole life through the television?

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:21, archived)

no he lives his social life through the internet.
this is important.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:22, archived)

Awwww:)
www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1197823/Pure-white-Bengal-tiger-born-stripes.html
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:23, archived)

she looks really sad

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:25, archived)

2.bp.blogspot.com/_7y8Jhm8GiGw/SJTGIfnquAI/AAAAAAAAAlU/-2GFTPQNaXc/s400/pug8.jpg
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:25, archived)

haha he looks well fucked off.

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:26, archived)

I YAM TRYIN MY BEST TO MAKE MY NECK STRETCHY

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:27, archived)

:(

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:27, archived)

Well, she has no stripes. Wouldn't you be sad?

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:26, archived)

I've got no stripes.
I manage.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:27, archived)

You're not a tiger, silly MGT.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:32, archived)

If it couldn't rip my throat out, I'd give it a hug.

( The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:26, archived)

In fact, one of the things I'd like to do before I die is hug a tiger.

( The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:26, archived)

Which is, funnily enough, probably the last thing I'd do before I die.

( The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:27, archived)

:)

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:26, archived)

To be fair, it's more interesting.
at 8:30 I'm Ben 10, at 9 I'm the news, at 10 I'm jermy kyle...etc.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:22, archived)

I saw something on telly once, true story.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:21, archived)

It's too late, he's already gone

( The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:22, archived)

ME OH ME I'LL DO IT

( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:22, archived)

Oh actually on second thought, no. Never.

( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:23, archived)

Why, where's he going?

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:23, archived)

Michael Jackson,
from his underground hyperbaric chamber.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:23, archived)

I'm headlining the SSG Farewell Concert

(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:26, archived)

he'll never die
the cancer will make him stronger.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:26, archived)

If he doesn't beat the cancer
I'll beat THESE DRUMS.

SSG FAREWELL TOUR XMAS 2009
(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:28, archived)

Things really are bad then

( The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:47, archived)

How long is it until the day where we get to tell everyone how much we dont care about their A-Level results?
That cant be far away now. I like that day, its one of the long standing traditions of b3ta.
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:07, archived)

I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR A-LEVEL RESULT

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:09, archived)

Noone told me it was today
I feel so under prepared:(
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:09, archived)

I'm just practicing
sorry I forgot the 'TEST' tags
( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:10, archived)

I'M OFF TO INDIA ON FRIDAY

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:10, archived)

I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR GAP YEAR RESULTS

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:10, archived)

If you see any elephants with big ears there
they're imposters and should be shot immediately.
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:11, archived)

In my pyjamas?

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:13, archived)

With one of those massive trumpet shaped rifles.
Bonus points for yelling, "TALLY HO!" as you do.
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:14, archived)

I'M GOING TO HANG OUT WITH THESE PARTY ANIMALS
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Muslim_men_bombay1867.jpg
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:17, archived)

I GOT AN A STAR - IN NOT CARING!

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:10, archived)

I don't care about anyone's results for anything
BEAT THAT, CAPTAIN APATHY
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:10, archived)

Or y'know, don't
Whatever
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:10, archived)

Girlfriend's HIV test results?

( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:11, archived)

Theo is allergic to girls

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:14, archived)

Other way round
I walk down the street and I can hear their fannies clanging shut like airlocks.
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:25, archived)

...their biggest mistake was shouting "Save us, Captain Apathy!"
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:12, archived)

I always enjoy seeing pictures of beautifull, doe-eyed, blonde home counties twins who
are waiting to see if they get good enough results to go to Oxford or Cambridge to be doctors or laywers.

And a plucky dark skinned kid from deprived flats in London who against all odds and coming from a no-parent family gets a clean sweep and is going to study at MIT.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:11, archived)

i dont do no book learnin

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:11, archived)

Where da white wimmin at?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:12, archived)

I AM HERE.
me bread bin.
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:14, archived)

Rispick, innit.

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:15, archived)

I READ BOOKS WITH MY EYES

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:12, archived)

I HAVE CUTTED HAIR

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:14, archived)

lemme see

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:17, archived)

i will when i get in.
i look like a ginger cleopatra.
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

This is relevant to my interests.
[edit] Now i've looked at your profile this is no longer relevant to my interests. Do you hear me FBI?
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:19, archived)

haha
i said GINGER
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:20, archived)

Nowt wrong with ginger

(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:21, archived)

Your anal mane?

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

sometimes you make me want to do sick

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:21, archived)

are you a cheerleader?
failblog.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/fail-owned-cheerleader-fail.jpg
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:13, archived)

top troll

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:15, archived)

Tumbling?

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:16, archived)

it's what they call floor gymnastics innit

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:17, archived)

That thing with the ball or the silk on a stick?

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:19, archived)

more like legging it across from one corner of a square, throwing themselves into the air in a ridiculous show of LOOK AT ME I'M WELL COOL
and then landing and throwing arms up in the air casually, whilst wearing a leotard and looking like a smug prick.
( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:20, archived)

I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR GAY-LEVEL RESULT
well, I do a tiny bit...gaz me
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:15, archived)

6% :(

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

6% hetro
GAY*
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:20, archived)

YAY!

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:24, archived)

I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR GAY REVEL INSULTS

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:22, archived)

blah blah blah blah blah blah

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:16, archived)

tomorrow i'm going to be told
THAT I'M A FAILURE
( weaver., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:25, archived)

That's a lie though, cos we know everyone cares about me and my escapades.

( ArthurTheRat, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:41, archived)

It's you isn't it? *points*
You're the human shrub aren't you?
( NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:50, archived)

Leaf it out

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:51, archived)

Or are you pollen my leg?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

You're barking up the wrong tree

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:00, archived)

TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE
TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE
TREE TREE TREE TREE
TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE
TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE
TREE TREE
TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:02, archived)

Pfft
I proclaim you the new Gonzo.

Can someone please dispose of the old one?
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:04, archived)

no let's keep both, it can be like a hilarious country house farce, with one running into a thread just as the other one disappears, saying "have you seen my brother? We're going to play tennis!"
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:06, archived)

It'd make a great sitcom
Like the odd couple. But with great hair.
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:07, archived)

TREE
TREE
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:08, archived)

TREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeee
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE*breath*EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:08, archived)

P P
O A
P G
L E
A
R
||
||
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:10, archived)

*takes Gonzo outside*
*ties his leash to the old tree in the field*
*tell Gonzo to sit still*
*sheds a single tear*
*...*

*digs hole and buries body*
*returns to house*

... it's done...
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:07, archived)

OH BOY ! OUTSIDE !
Oh man, oh man, I can't wait, are we going to see squirals? I think I can smell some squiral piss, they're soo cool. Look at that, a tree ! *sniffles around*, oh wow, that's so cool, look at all this grass, I think I can smell.... yes.... THERE'S A SQUIRAL ! YES !
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:11, archived)

aww
this is so adorable
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

at first I didn't get any of those jokes
But now i have just twigged
( Gooch Is neither here nor there, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:05, archived)

....
...

..

....

...

Tree?
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:06, archived)

Sorry
But they had me stumped for a while
( Gooch Is neither here nor there, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:08, archived)

SHRUB

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:08, archived)

Bastards the lot of you:(

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:02, archived)

Why don't you make like a tree and get out of here?

( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:51, archived)

Make like a banana
and go.
( NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:53, archived)

we established yesterday that i am a tree, not a shrub
that guy looks like the thing on the cover of a young knives album
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

that's a privet matter
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

I'm not clicking that

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

Why are councillers such fucking mong tards

“If the Human Shrub is crossing dual carriageways in order to make a political point then I think he is being very irresponsible.”

“He could get himself injured or killed, or even worse could lead to someone else being injured or killed.

“At least when he was outside the town hall he was amusingly stupid.

“This is not funny at all.” 

What a lot of shit. "Man can't cross road" spaswank
( magnum, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:53, archived)

It's not a man
it's a shrub.

And they're good at roads. I often see 'Plant Crossing' signs.
( NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:54, archived)

haha
"heavy plant turning ahead" makes me think of an oak tree on a turntable.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:56, archived)

But I might think there is a tree in the middle of the road and try and drive through it...

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:54, archived)

Indeed.
It just reads
"waaa waaa waaa, we are being pointed out as cunts and now we feel obliged to try to deflect that by making some harmless, and indeed probably beneficial, person seem like the bad guy"
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:57, archived)

local councils see themselves as the nannies of the community,
if some member of the community only goes and voluntarily does something for their own community, that's like stealing their thunder.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:59, archived)

And none more so than Edinburgh city council.
We moved two sets of the communal bins together (about 35ft apart), to allow a much better organised and easier to use street parking, after checking for disabled, or even just unhappy residents.

A few weeks later (and much better parking from the residents) there was a series of big angry neon orange warning letters posted on the bin saying CCTV might used to catch the culprits.
The bin men like it as it saves them a few minutes work.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:07, archived)

This is the old
"I am the master of where things should go, you will respect my authoriteeee" effect.

What would you even get charged with? Is "moving a bin" even an offence?
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:08, archived)

According to my laywer (srsly) it would be someting about vandalising road furniture,
but there is a slight grey area with wheeled bins on roads, apparently, that would mean the CPS wouldn't even entertain it.

In short, they would be furious and would issue all sorts of threats, but it would be toys out the pram.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:13, archived)

see if you can organise for everyone on the street
to go out at the same time and move it together.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:16, archived)

I was thinking
of Guy Fawkes masks, and blaming 4chan.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

They would have to prove actual damage and malice for that to stick.

( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:20, archived)

Apparently 'moving' can be construed as vandalism.
But, again its just hissy fit stuff.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:22, archived)

Vandalism is covered by the Criminal Damages Act 1991, section 2:
[where a person] without lawful excuse damages any property belonging to another, intending to damage any such property, or being reckless as to whether any such property would be damaged shall be guilty of an offence.
( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:27, archived)

Fair enough.
They might whine about the placement of the bins could lead to them beocming damaged (it's on a straight piece of road.....), but I certaihly won't argue with your quote.

In which case my previous point, as seemingly enshrined in local Council law, stands: big squealy hissy fit, waa waa waa.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:35, archived)

Ah. I've just spotted that this is Scotland,
the Common Law offence of Malicious Mischief therefore applies, although they'd still need to establish malicious intent.
( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:39, archived)

And, of course,
if it's on Council property you may be guilty of Trespass as soon as you breach any prescribed conditions of consent, which could reasonably include "Not fucking About With The Bins".
( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:42, archived)

It's comments like that, that reconfirm that polititions are humourless cunts... 99% of the time.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:01, archived)

and the other 1% of the time it's Boris Johnson,
who's a veritable cornucopia of comedy in himself.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:03, archived)

Exactomondo.
And the whole Expense-gate thing, it shows they do have a smidgin of a sense of humour.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:04, archived)

I wish they'd stop it with the "gate" thing,
one day there's going to be a scandal about a gate, and the media are going to have to change their naming scheme or look very silly calling it "gategate".
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:06, archived)

Oh hai Nobby.
How's the parrot?
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:57, archived)

Haha, he's a national hero in my eyes.
I love stories like that.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:58, archived)

The shrub of our hearts
in haeven with babby p and maddy?
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:59, archived)

Mikale jaykson.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:00, archived)

Baby Peat

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:00, archived)

A++++ post, would LOL again.

(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:02, archived)

Oh man, I want to get a little bush and dedicate it to Maddy.
So I can call people sickos for looking at Maddy's bush.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:03, archived)

I am formaly requesting that you start linking to your comic again, maybe in a Near The Top if shitcunts are complaining.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:59, archived)

I post on the off topic board
From my wonderful Honda Accord
While I'm fucking a model
Even though as a toddle

r

My uncle rummaged in my drawers.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:46, archived)

I hope you can all see this image.
photos-e.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/hs110.snc1/4814_115230732256_505237256_2513260_936754_n.jpg
( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:48, archived)

What. The. Fuck?

( Bats, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:48, archived)

I know the one on the right.
She doesn't know Ms. Tango.
( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:49, archived)

Is Tango why the middle one looks so scared?

( Bats, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:50, archived)

I think so.

( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

and so?
"person in photograph with person they don't know shock"

that NEVER happens.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:51, archived)

Every time someone takes a picture with me in it, I have to vet the other participants
They have to sign disclaimers
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

why?

( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:49, archived)

SickRik is a transvestite?

( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:49, archived)

That girl on the right's heat vision burnt the woman on the left

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:49, archived)

*terminator theme*

( ArthurTheRat, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:49, archived)

pfft

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:50, archived)

Orange

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:50, archived)

the one in the middle looks like she really doesn't want to be there.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:50, archived)

I like the way she's tanned her teeth too.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:51, archived)

I tried a limesikrick, do you want to read it?
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:53, archived)

No thanks.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:56, archived)

that's nearly the right answer, do you want to try again?
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:58, archived)

I graduated yesterday.
What rites of passage have you been through recently?

Edit: www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=30126159&l=62305de117&id=195000023 PROOF
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:28, archived)

the number 25 from whitechapel to holborn

( Jenk Neptune is a pedant and now I can't fit my sig in, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:29, archived)

well, it felt like a fucking epic journey of shitness.

( Jenk Neptune is a pedant and now I can't fit my sig in, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:29, archived)

thats funny
cos I threw 19 first years off my course yesterday. felt good to ruin their shitty little lives.

I tried contact lenses for the first time yesterday as well, it was wrong on so many levels so I took them out.
(Goatse not a comedy account, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:29, archived)

you must have strong arms to throw 19 19 year olds around like that.

( Jenk Neptune is a pedant and now I can't fit my sig in, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:30, archived)

The best part is there's 19 of them.

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:33, archived)

n-n-n-n-nineteen

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:41, archived)

What do you teach and why did you toss them off?

( magnum, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:34, archived)

Masterbation Studies

(Is this a good idea? ... Yes this is definitely a good idea, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:38, archived)

Way to reilliterate the joke there.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:40, archived)

hahahha reilliterate.
I LOVE GONZIO.
( sleepybinky, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:42, archived)

ME TOO
let's form a fan club!

gonzonholicks anonnimouse
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:45, archived)

Do you want to be my best man?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:47, archived)

not if you're marrying binky
unless you don't mind me poisoning your booze at the stag do and usurping you
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:51, archived)

As long as I get a slice of the cake, i'll be a happy man.
It best not be one of those fruit'n'marzipan affairs though.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

done deal
*handshake*
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:58, archived)

LET'S GET MARRIED !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:46, archived)

did it really feel good? if so, you're a cunt
if you're just saying it felt good, to try and impress people. you're a cunt.

which is it?
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:35, archived)

Hee hee this^

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:41, archived)

I'm going for a little bit of column A
a little bit of column B.

It's OK, if he really did throw out 19 students he'll be fucked trying to explain his retention statistics to University managment.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:43, archived)

alternative possibility
(though this being b3ta, not a probability I'd go for)
is that they weren't actually working on their studies at all, and had an unrealistic expectation that attending occasional lectures was sufficient to pass the course. short sharp shock in reality later, they would stand a chance at either working out what they need to be doing, or aiming a smidge lower.
*shrug* still somewhat c*ntish bragging about it, however
( evilstevie misses the Orange Place of late, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:46, archived)

yeah
except we don't do that by throwing them off the course except in extreme circumstances where all else has failed. It takes time to adjust to the Uni way of working, our job is to help them adjust. Otherwise the failure is ours as much as the students.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:49, archived)

no
ejecting the chaff makes sense if they're clearly doing the wrong thing

this was my problem:

"felt good to ruin their shitty little lives"
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:49, archived)

which Uni did you get kicked out of then?

(Goatse not a comedy account, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

You also work in a University
and secretly, it didn't really feel good, I was indifferent but saying that wouldn't be in the spirit of /talk would it?
(Goatse not a comedy account, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:50, archived)

I'd say the spirit of /talk
was more along the lines of brutal honesty than lying to stop people from liking you.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:56, archived)

Oh whoops
I actually thought it was a competition to see who could say the most abusive and inflammatory thing ever
(Goatse not a comedy account, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:59, archived)

no that usually only happens by accident,
but once you've started a hole, you've got to keep on digging.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:00, archived)

you are correct and have a great big arse
do you see what i did there?
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:00, archived)

you ain't seen my arse,
but actually I rather like it.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:01, archived)

correct
I'm a cunt but since I tell everyone that up front at least I'm a fair cunt
(Goatse not a comedy account, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:47, archived)

you didn't ruin their lives,
you only sent them on a different path.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:40, archived)

Your course must be (very expensive)

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:41, archived)

D: in 5 years there will be a national shortage of dog groomers and it will be ALL YOUR FAULT!

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:42, archived)

PUG STUDIES.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:43, archived)

FUCK YES!
I would soooooo get a 1:1:1:1
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:44, archived)

surely you'd be the lecturer
HEAD OF FACULTY EVEN
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:45, archived)

I YAM HERE TO DO TEACHING YOOOS
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:48, archived)

Hey, pups
want to look at some babies?
( magnum, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:44, archived)

errr FILTH.

( sleepybinky, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:31, archived)

Same here.
My own.

Lol.
(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:31, archived)

la la la
*innocents*
( sleepybinky, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:32, archived)

just chopped it off eh?

( sleepybinky, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:32, archived)

or just worked out how to angle the mirrors?

( sleepybinky, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:32, archived)

*wide eyes*

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:36, archived)

WHUT

( sleepybinky, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:37, archived)

oh nothing. nothing...

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:38, archived)

i wide-eyed too actually.

( sleepybinky, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:38, archived)

*boggles*

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:47, archived)

i didnt do that, there wasnt time.

( sleepybinky, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:48, archived)

you have to MAKE time

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:55, archived)

Three years of Performance
Got a first, yo
(__, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:31, archived)

*first fives*

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:33, archived)

I got my first pube yesterday
Mummy says I'm going to hell now :(
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:32, archived)

I'm reverse ageing instead of getting white pubes
they're going black.
(Bababoon, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:39, archived)

Choosing a school for my firstborn.
old old old/
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:32, archived)

If it were your 8th child I would say OLD
firstborn isn't too bad... unless it's secondary school.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:34, archived)

It's driving school

( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:35, archived)

Happy Candleday
it's actually a seminary.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:36, archived)

Thank you.
3 years though, so I'm still a young un.

Excellent career options in a seminary.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:36, archived)

being buggered
or just touched up?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:44, archived)

Send them to Galaxy High!

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:37, archived)

Mainly very rubbish ones.
I'm very proud of you. What are you going to do next?
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:32, archived)

An MA in The Gothic Cathedral
I figure it's wise to do such a vocational and transferable postgraduate course in these turbulent times.

I'm sure you've done plenty of ACE things Wicca.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:36, archived)

I haven't done anything very ace for the last couple of weeks.
I do have Druid and FF and BlueStar and Chicken visiting at the weekend. That will cheer me up.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:38, archived)

I dunno about that, well done to you though
The good news is I had a look at my current account and found a fuckload more there than I thought I had :)
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:33, archived)

I fought with my team through a field of 21 teams
and we won. Which is nice.
( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:33, archived)

*waves Team GMOS banner*

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:38, archived)

*organises Team GMOS cheerleading*

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:40, archived)

I'm now 26 and I got ID'd by a girl in Game when buying Bioshock, she thought I was 17...

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:40, archived)

hahah
little iddly widdly DG
( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:42, archived)

It made me feel good that I look young as I'm only 4 years from 30
But then it probably just means that I looked a bit greasy with a terrible beard :(
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:43, archived)

I got IDed a few weeks back, at 32.
Mind you they're up to "challenge 25" in some places now.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:45, archived)

hah, that sounds pretty similar to my style.

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:45, archived)

News and Assignment Location Safety course

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:41, archived)

So basically
avoiding what the cameraman does here? (within the first 10 seconds)
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:48, archived)

None whatsoever.

( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:43, archived)

Buying D-cup bras for my not-such-a-baby-any-more daughter...

( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:44, archived)

I know the feeling mate, I had the same problem with her




*fucking runs like the clappers :D*
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:45, archived)

Dude.
She's not quite thirteen...
( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:47, archived)

Oh, great, set a playah up yo'.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:49, archived)

D:
I'll go hand myself in
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:51, archived)

Ha ha, oh dear.

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:06, archived)

The woman who measured her made her an "E" at first
and revised it down under appeal...
( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:07, archived)

aside from the Bruce Lee films, which don't even tickle me all that much
are there any decent kung-fu/ninja films?
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 13:58, archived)

Machine Girl
it's a modern classic, ahead of its time.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 13:59, archived)

In all seriousness
I like House of Flying Daggers and Kung Fu Hustle.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:10, archived)

Kung fu hustle is the business
Shaolin Soccer is great as well :D
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:13, archived)

Kung Fu Hustle.

( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:00, archived)

Kung Fu Panda

( WHARRGARBL, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:00, archived)

and Shaolin Soccer

/edit: i've answered your question. now, are there any one-word band names that begin with V or Z?
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:05, archived)

Zia

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:08, archived)

i've just had a google
their website has a LOT of text and they don't even warrant a wikipedia page

still, current winner
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:11, archived)

Most obscure band I know,
I only found them by looking into unconventional tuning schemes.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:13, archived)

Veatles

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:09, archived)

HAY THAT'S NOT REAL

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:15, archived)

Vaporhead

( Jenk Neptune is a pedant and now I can't fit my sig in, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:10, archived)

fuck it..
www.findthefun.com/bands/lists/blv.htm
www.findthefun.com/bands/lists/blz.htm
( Jenk Neptune is a pedant and now I can't fit my sig in, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:11, archived)

i was hoping for something that anyone has heard of

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:12, archived)

Zwan.
They're Zhit.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:15, archived)

brilliant!
i've heard of them and everything!

ta.
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:21, archived)

now do V please

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:22, archived)

VISAGE!
"Fade To Grey"
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:24, archived)

Also, 80s hair-rock girlband Vixen
my mate was desperately in love with the singer.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:25, archived)

this rings a faint bell
i'm going with it

ALPHABET COMPLETE
i have also done films
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:29, archived)

Verve?
Or was that The Verve? Are we allowed "the" as a free extra? If so, The Zombies.

Ooh, Vangelis.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:22, archived)

nope. if 'the' is allowed
it's a piece of piss

i've got the whole alphabet aside from V
i'm really hoping there is one that i have heard of
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:26, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=cznha2YTTh0
www.youtube.com/watch?v=y9aR2jKiFQs
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:28, archived)

Verve have been both in their time
so I think that would be excusable

Vixen is the obvious one though.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:32, archived)

never 'eard of 'em

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:39, archived)

but you are YOUNG.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:50, archived)

Venom?
They're shit, but they have been going for a long time. Sort of a black metal Status Quo.
( Lord Gnome, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:27, archived)

what a hideous idea
no, never heard of them

going with visage

THANKS FOR THE HELP EVERYONE
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:30, archived)

The Legend of Fong Sai Yuk

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:00, archived)

China O'Brian does dallas

(likeajackhammer, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:00, archived)

apart from the acting
Ong-Bak is ok, if only they didn't repeat every single punch

Early Jackie Chan films are cheesy but good.
( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:02, archived)

Yojimbo is an amazing film about a Ronin, but I suspect it doesn't have enough action for what you'd consider a proper 'kung-fu' action film
although obviously they do Kenjutsu.
( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:03, archived)

Early Jackie Chan
Especially the one where his autistic brother keeps getting him into trouble.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:05, archived)

happy furry candle dinosaur day

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:07, archived)

look at you with your candleyways

( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:09, archived)

happy candle!

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:10, archived)

happy candleday deary!

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:12, archived)

Happy Candlejack, whoops, I meant candled

( ArthurTheRat, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:13, archived)

Sod off with that Candlejack shit, it's not even funn

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:16, archived)

I don

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:20, archived)

You're doing it wrong, you have to say Candlejack first and then you cut out at the end of the sente

( ArthurTheRat, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:44, archived)

I know, I just didn't get far enough to actually say Ca

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:44, archived)

This
Also the ones he made in Austrailia/New Zealand when his English was still sketchy are silly but still very entertaining.

Also, happy candlemas!
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:22, archived)

THANK YOU ALL FOR THE SACRED CANDLEDAY GOOD WISHES

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:28, archived)

The one I dreamed about the other night was damn awesome
Doesn't exist though. But man it was cool.
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:06, archived)

I've been having dreams about fighting recently,
I wonder what it means.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:07, archived)